Page 41 of Unscripted Love
“It’s a saying that Josh is prone to use on occasion. That one and ‘calm your tits.’ So, what did you do?” Gabe asked again.
“It’s not me,” I said, holding my right hand up like I was swearing in before giving testimony. “I thought we were finally heading in the right direction, butheput the brakes on when I asked him on a date. He turned me down flat.”
“You asked Chaz on a date, and he turned you down flat? No explanations or nothing?” Gabe asked to clarify.
“Nothing,” I said, shaking my head because I still couldn’t believe it. “One minute he was looking at me with eyes that begged me to kiss him again, and the next he was telling me that he couldn’t go out with me, but didn’t say why. I think I’m just going to give up.”
“Don’t do that, Kyle,” Gabe said firmly. “If you weren’t upset about it, then I’d agree with you, but you are upset. That means you do care and brushing away your feelings isn’t the right thing to do.” I knew Gabe was thinking about all the twists and turns he and Josh had taken before they fell madly in love with one another. “I promise you that it’s worth the battle.”
I inhaled deeply and released my breath slowly. I turned my head and looked over to where Chaz was sitting next to Emory. Chaz looked up just then, and our eyes met and held for a few seconds before he looked away again. Our connection didn’t last long, but I saw the same yearning in Chaz’s eyes that I felt in my heart. I recognized the sadness and loneliness looking back at me and wondered why we were apart if we were both so damn miserable. “Yeah, okay.”
“Good man,” Gabe said and patted me on the shoulder.
That didn’t mean it was easy for me to be patient and bide my time while Chaz sorted himself out. I fought with myself every day not to call or text him over the next two weeks. My conviction flew out the window when I showed up at Josh and Gabe’s Halloween party and saw Chaz wearing leather pants. It was the icebreaker I needed though.
“Are you a leather daddy?” I asked him.
“Hardly,” Chaz said and snorted. “I’m Ross fromFriends.” The episode where Ross sweated in the leather pants and couldn’t pull them up was one of my favorites also. “Where’s your costume?” Chaz asked.
I smiled shyly and undid the top three buttons on my shirt. “I came as Chandler,” I said, flashing him my fake third nipple.
“Oh my God! You have a nubbin!” Chaz threw his head back and laughed. I had missed the sound of his laughter almost as much as his kisses. “That’s perfect.” The smile slid from his face, and he looked somberly at me. “I didn’t think you were coming.”
“I wasn’t sure either,” I said honestly. I’d talked myself in and out of it multiple times that day. By the time I arrived at the party, it was in full swing. Hell, I hadn’t even sought out the hosts to say hello before I made my way to Chaz.
“I’m sorry,” he said.
I opened my mouth to respond, but someone cranked up the volume on Bobby Pickett’s “Monster Mash.” I chuckled as the people started getting down to the popular Halloween song before I turned my attention back to Chaz. “I can tell that you’re sorry, but I wish I knew why.” I had raised my voice so he could hear me over the music. “Are you sorry that you hurt me or sorry that nothing has changed?”
Chaz flinched as if I hit him, but he didn’t break eye contact with me. I saw his resolve to talk to me in his expression and in the way he squared his shoulders. “I need to tell you something, Kyle. I should’ve told you months ago,” he said.
“You can tell me anything,” I told Chaz. I was certain that nothing he said would change my feelings for him. “I won’t like you any less.”
Chaz leaned forward and pressed his lips to my ears and said, “I’m Drew.”
I jerked back from him and looked into his eyes. He wasn’t joking as I had first suspected. Anger and humiliation washed over me. Chaz knew this whole fucking time? He made me talk about the situation with Drew during lunch. Oh my God, had he been playing me? First as his alter ego, Drew, until that got old. I was horrified as I recalled some of the intimate things I chatted about with Drew.
I couldn’t think anymore; I reacted instead. I tossed Chaz over my shoulder caveman style and started carrying him toward the door.
“What are you doing?” Chaz squealed in alarm.
Fury rose swift and fierce inside me and I wasn’t sure how to process it. “Not a word out of you,” I said sharply then followed my command with a slap to his leather-clad ass.What the fuck was I doing? I should’ve postponed our conversation until I was calmer, but I couldn’t put him down and walk away. I wasn’t one to anger quickly, or hardly at all. I was always calm, cool, and in control until Chaz Hamilton came into my world.
“Where are you taking me?” he demanded to know.
Chaz didn’t take direction very well, so I slapped his ass again.
“I’m taking you somewhere we can hash this out in private,” I said. “I can’t believe you, Chaz.” As angry as I was at him, the prodominant emotion I felt was disappointment. I had been let down by people many times during my lifetime and I didn’t always live up to my own expectations, but somehow I didn’t expect that from Chaz. I held him to a higher standard even though he hinted that I shouldn’t the morning after we have sex for the first time. I couldn’t imagine Chaz had a good reason, but I knew in my heart that Chaz wasn’t a jerk, even if his actions indicated otherwise. I would hear what he had to say for himself then make a decision on where to go from there.
I carried Chaz to my truck and unceremoniously dumped him in the passenger seat. “Don’t you fucking move.”
“Okay then,” Chaz said agreeably, but it lacked the perky tone of voice he normally used. Then I realized where I’d heard that phrase. Drew! He used it a lot when we played online or chatted. How the hell did I miss that?
Chaz wisely stayed put and didn’t say anything else until we arrived back at my house. “Spill it,” I said after I gave him a few minutes to greet my pets.
“Otis is growing so fast,” Chaz said sadly.
“Chaz,” I growled in a warning tone. “You owe me an explanation.”