Page 40 of Unscripted Love

I stood tall and proud when the next kid stepped up to the makeshift plate in the gym. I squared my body like I’d seen the other kids do and had my arms up ready to catch the ball that I knew was coming my way. I underestimated the speed of the rubber ball and took a line-drive shot to my balls. It hurt so fucking bad and knocked the wind out of me. I thought I was going to puke all over the polished gym floor. I could still hear the laughter of the other kids in the class as I dropped to my knees holding my nuts.

I can honestly say that Chaz rejecting me outright then walking away was a thousand times more painful than the nut shot in gym class that day. He knocked the wind out of me, and I felt like I was going to be sick all over Gabe and Josh’s lawn. In addition to the searing pain, I was so fucking confused. Not ten minutes before his “I can’t, Kyle,” we were smiling, laughing, and making plans to spend the night wrapped up in each other. What the hell happened to me being better than any fictional book boyfriend?

I don’t know how long I stood there numbly staring before I pulled myself together and went home. I didn’t sleep a wink that night and dragged my ass through Sunday and Monday in a dazed fog.What the hell happenedkept repeating in my mind over and over. I couldn’t answer the question no matter how many times I replayed the night. Chaz was fine until he went to tell Meredith goodnight. I was tempted to call her, but I decided against it. She and Josh were Chaz’s best friends and asking them to betray his confidence was just wrong.

The only available option for me was to accept that Chaz and I didn’t want the same things. He wasn’t going to be my happily ever after. Acknowledging it didn’t make me feel better, but I at least felt a little more in control of my emotions. Even so, I wasn’t as excited about touring the house after work on Monday night. Becker Howard was all teeth, reminding me of the cat fromAlice in Wonderland.

“Are you ready to see your forever home?” he asked.

Are you ready to eat your stupid fucking teeth?I forced myself to snap out of my funk because it wasn’t Becker’s fault that I was in a foul mood. I offered him a small smile and said, “Wow me, Becker.”

Becker looked me up and down like he was trying to figure out if I was still talking about the house or something else. Look, the guy was cute, and his attention was flattering—especially on the heels of Chaz’s rejection. Sure, I might’ve felt better if I fucked him against the foyer wall, but regret would’ve moved in before I could remove the condom. He must’ve seen the true meaning of my words in my expression because he smiled professionally then he opened the front door and said, “Right this way.”

The interior of the two-story spacious home blew me away. The first thing you saw when you entered was a grand staircase made of dark, polished wood. The front level was an open floor plan, which meant I could see the large picture window in the family room wall at the rear of the house from the front door and it offered an amazing view of the pond and wooded acres behind the house.

“Wow,” I said.

“Isn’t it something?” Becker asked, sounding mighty pleased with himself.

“It truly is,” I answered.

“I’m just going to hang out here in the kitchen and catch up on some emails while you tour the house. Sound good?” he asked.

“Yes, thank you.” I was relieved that I didn’t have to attempt inane banter when I wasn’t in the mood. I had one mission: determine if this was the house for me. I was glad I could do that in peace and quiet.

I started upstairs and took my time looking at each of the bedrooms and full bathrooms. There were more bedrooms than I could imagine needing, but I’d rather have too much space than too little. I stood in the smallest of the bedrooms and thought it would make a great home office. It overlooked the pond and trees, and I thought it would inspire a lot of writing. My heart lurched as soon as the thought crossed my mind. No, the room wouldn’t be used to write best-selling novels, but I was certain I could put it to good use.

I checked out the finished basement and the first floor before I met Becker in the kitchen. “I love that master bedroom,” I told Becker. I didn’t tell him that the custom tile shower was exactly like the one I hoped to share with Chaz. I also didn’t tell him that the gourmet kitchen was way more than I needed since I basically only used the microwave.

“Would you like a day or two to think about it?” Becker asked. “I think the homeowners wouldn’t mind giving you that time before they list the house on the market.”

“I want this house,” I told Becker.

He wrote up the offer, and the homeowners accepted it a few hours later. I started working with my loan officer the next morning so that I had something positive to focus on instead of the emptiness I felt with Chaz’s absence in my life. I took my family over to the house a few days later to see it because they were excited for me, plus my mom needed an idea so she could help me decorate.

Mom leaned against the kitchen island and smiled up at me. “I told you that Becker knew his stuff.”

“You were right,” I told her.

“Cute too,” she added.

“Mom,” I said in a warning tone.

“I know the look of heartbreak when I see it,” she said. “I know that you’re not ready to move on right now, but Becker has potential when that day comes.”

Becker was cute, smart, and funny. My brain said he was my type, but my heart said otherwise. My mom might’ve been right, and I only needed time, but I didn’t think that was the case. If I ever got over Chaz Hamilton, I was pretty sure that Becker wasn’t the guy I would seek.

The next two weeks dragged on at a torturously slow pace. I miraculously avoided running into Chaz, which was good and bad. I didn’t want to be around him, but I needed to see that he wore misery all over his face like I did. I knew that my staff worried about my withdrawn mood, but they didn’t say anything. On a whim, I started bringing Sadie to work with me and that lifted my spirits. She was great with my animal patients, their owners, and my staff adored having her around all day. Having her and Otis helped ease my loneliness, but it wasn’t a cure.

I was supposed to go to dinner at Josh and Gabe’s the Sunday after they returned from their two-week honeymoon. It was the last place that I wanted to be, but I went anyway. I tried my best not to even look in Chaz’s direction because I didn’t want to give him the satisfaction of knowing how much he hurt me. I had decided to move on with my life and get over him at any cost. The first step was to suck it up and spend time near him while not really being with him. I sat quietly in a corner and sipped my beer, hoping no one would notice I wasn’t interacting with the others. Of course, I wasn’t that lucky.

“What did you do?” Gabe asked.

“Me?” I was shocked that he asked me such a ridiculous question. “Me?”

“Yes, you,” Gabe said. “You looked like you were so close to getting everything you deserved and now… Well, it looks like everything went tits up.”

“Tits up?” I asked.