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Jon was in the hot tub, lost in the beauty of the night sky. The moon hung perfectly over the water, framed by a halo of stars. It had been a perfect day, and he didn’t want it to end. They would have to pack up and head home in the morning. Our home . The words repeated to the rhythm of the crashing waves. There was no doubt in his mind that he loved Levi, but there would always be fear that his love couldn’t be reciprocated. He didn’t know what it was like to love and have his love returned unconditionally. He thought his family had loved him, but life had proven him wrong.

He closed his eyes and let himself slide down into the water until he felt the water lapping against his chin.

“Jon? What are you doing?”

He remained silent for a moment.

“Jon? Are you ok?”

He pushed his way back up. He opened his eyes and smiled.

“I’m fine now that you’re here. I was just floating away.”

“You looked like you were about to fall asleep and go under. I mean, I know CPR, but it’s not exactly the most romantic thing.”

“I’d owe you even more than I do as it stands now. You’ve already saved my life once.”

Levi climbed into the hot tub and placed his arm around Jon’s shoulder. “Everything I’ve done for you, Gus did for me. Well, except for the whole falling in love part. I did what I did because it was the right thing to do…and I love you. It was just hard for me to tell you. Part of me wanted to tell you when I woke up and realized that you were real. I was afraid—more scared than I was when I left home. I thought you were out of my league. Hell, you are . I still pinch myself at least once a day because I can’t believe I’m lucky enough to see your smile, let alone go to sleep with you in my arms.”

Jon felt his blood rush to his face. He rested his head on Levi’s shoulder. “For the record, I don’t know why you think I’m out of your league…I thought I was out of yours. I know I’ll spend the rest of my life making this up to you, too. Somehow.”

Levi smiled and kissed the top of his head. “Well, just know that you don’t have to. Everything I do for you I do because I love you,” He sighed, “and this conversation’s going to make the next part more awkward than I thought it would be.”

Jon looked up at him. His brow furrowed and his jaw stiffened. “What do you mean?”

“Well, you’ve got a job now. I know you don’t mind the bus, and you said you’re mostly working from home, but I don’t like the idea of you having to plan to take the bus or be stuck waiting around for a bus to get home like you would have yesterday if I hadn’t surprised you.”

“It was very nice of you, but what are you getting at?”

“Well, I know we’ve really not had any in-depth financial discussions. But if I was a betting man, I’d wager you don’t have much of a credit history, and I know you probably won’t be getting your first paycheck for another couple of weeks.”

Jon felt the world spin. “What…”

Levi interrupted him. “I think you need your own car. I’ll cosign for you if you need it, and I just wanted to let you know that. You need your independence and not have to rely on me to take you places. I think if I cosigned for you, there’s no need to wait for your first paycheck, either. I know having no down payment sucks, but we can cross that bridge once you find something you like.”

Jon inhaled deeply. “So you are saying you want to help me buy a car in the next couple of weeks?”

Levi smiled. “Yes sir. If you want.”

“You don’t have to do that.”

“I know, but I want to. I want you to be able to run to the store if you need to while I’m at the bar.” His cheeks flushed. “Maybe I want you to be able to drop in to visit, have a drink, or see the band. I want you to be able to storm off if I piss you off, even though I hope that doesn’t happen.”

“I don’t know what to say.”

“You don’t have to say anything right now. Just think about it. I wanted to open the door because I am pretty sure you wouldn’t have asked, no matter how bad you need it. You can start looking this week online, and we’ll hit the lots Saturday morning.”

Jon pulled away from Levi and sat across from him. “Ok, I’ll think about it.” He leaned back to gaze at the moon. “It’s so damn beautiful out here.”

“Yeah. I think that’s why Gus isn’t going to rent it out anymore. He said he’d be spending more time here, so he may not be around Derecho much longer. Truth be told, I think he’s finally confronting some ghosts from his past, and this place houses some of those painful memories.”

“That makes sense. Granted, he could just be saying ‘fuck it, I’m gonna live the rest of my life as a beach bum’.”

Levi laughed. “It’s possible, but I doubt that…he’s always been a workaholic, so I just can’t picture him relaxing.”

“You’re probably right.”

“I’m sure it’ll come up tomorrow night. He’s grilling again, and he said we had to be there. Not an invitation. An order .”

“He’s up to something, isn’t he?”

“I think so. But after this, I can’t imagine what.”

Jon smiled and stared at Levi.

“What is it?”

“I was just thinking about this is my last night in the hot tub with my boyfriend…and how I intend to take full advantage of it.” He tossed his speedo out onto the deck, took a breath, and went under the water.