Page 19

“Levi. Have you got a minute?”

“Gus! What the hell are you doing here?”

“Well, it is my bar still, isn’t it?” Gus flashed a sly grin.

“You know what I meant, old man. You’re retired and should be relaxing. Anywhere but here.”

Gus laughed. “Why would I do that? It’s easier to give you a hard time in person. You can ignore calls and texts, but here I can go anywhere you can.”

Levi shook his head. “What can I do for ya?”

“We need to talk. Can you step away for a sec?”

“Sure thing. We can go to the office.”

Gus’s smile faded. “Not the office. Upstairs.”

Levi felt the blood leave his face. Surely Gus only wanted to go up there to be sure that no one interrupted or overheard, but he could feel a knot forming in his stomach.

“Sure thing, Gus.”

Neither of them spoke as they ascended the stairs to the apartment. Levi was terrified. Gus seemed somber.

As they entered, Gus motioned towards a chair. “Levi. Sit.”

That didn’t ease his nerves one bit. He simply nodded and did as he was told.

“I’ve tried this the easy way, but now I think it’s time to be a little more direct.”

“What do you mean?”

“Jon.”

Levi’s heart dropped. “What about him?”

“I have my suspicions about how you feel about him, but I want to hear you say it.”

Levi looked down, avoiding making eye contact.

“Levi? How do you feel about him?”

Levi opened his mouth to speak, but nothing came out.

“I’ve known you for what? 12 years now? I’ve never seen you like this. I’ve seen the way you’ve looked at him from the moment you saw him when we walked through that door onto the landing.”

Levi hung his head. “Gus. I can’t.”

“Yes, you can Levi. Let the words come out.” Gus was pleading with him now.

“Damn you, Gus! I love him. Is that what you wanted to hear?”

“All I wanted was for you to speak your truth.”

“Why?”

“Because I had to be sure before I said what I thought needed to be said.”

Levi looked confused.

“How do you feel about Jon being gone this week?”

“I hate it. I miss curling up with him after a long shift. Sure, I get to see him on his lunches on those stupid video calls, but it isn’t the same. I can’t touch his face. I miss the warmth I feel when he smiles.”

Gus smiled. “I know what you mean. You miss him the way I miss Betty.”

“I don’t think it’s quite the same.”

“Oh? But in a way, it is.” The grin on Gus’s face dropped to a scowl. “And you still haven’t told him, have you? You’re just hiding behind your little wall. Well damn it Levi, it’s time to tear the fucking wall down.”

Levi couldn’t respond. He wanted to scream. To run out the door and not look back, but he couldn’t. Gus was speaking the truth, no matter how much he wanted to avoid it.

Gus was glaring at him. Waiting.

“What.”

“I’m sorry, son. I just felt like you needed some tough love.”

Levi shook his head. “Damn. Gus, I just…were you a cop in another life?”

Gus laughed. “No Levi. I just know you. I may not have raised you, but damn, you are just like Timmy.”

Levi looked down. “You never talk about him.”

“No.”

“Why?”

Gus gave him a half-smile. “Guilt. Just like I know how you feel about Jon, I knew he was in love with a boy. The night he died I thought about hinting, ya know. Not scaring him. Just saying ‘I love you, no matter what’ or something like that. I was scared, and I told myself that I could put it off another day.”

“Gus I…”

“Let me finish. Please.”

Levi nodded slowly.

“I don’t want to see you lose Jon because you kept thinking that you would wait another day just to be sure that you’re strong enough. But you know what? You are strong enough. I’ve watched you grow from a broken young man into something that you should be proud of. I wish you could see it.”

“What do you suggest I do? I don’t want to lose him, and I don’t know how to take that next step.”

“Well, you told me you love him. All you have to do is tell him. It’s not rocket science. It’s three words. That’s it. Three. Damn. Words.”

Levi laughed. “Might as well be three million.”

“Well, you still just have to say them. I don’t want to see you lose him.”

Levi panicked. “What? Did he say something?”

“Lord no Levi. I wouldn’t have staged this intervention if he had. Like I said, I’d just hate to see you keep avoiding the obvious until it’s too late.”

“Thank you.”

“So, what are you going to do?”

“Tell him I love him the next time I see him. Which will probably be Saturday morning.”

“Well. I’ve been thinking…” Gus handed him an envelope. There was an address written on the outside.

“What’s this?”

“When Betty and I moved to Derecho, we also bought a beach house in Galveston. Figured it was a good weekend getaway for the family. After Timmy died, we never went back. We hired a property management company to take care of the upkeep and rent it out. I called them right before I left for Tennessee and told them to take the rental off the market for this season.”

“Your trip to Galveston was to get the key.”

Gus smiled. “Guilty. I’m planning to spend a lot of time there soon. I can’t just stay here all the time. If I don’t get out of town, I’ll end up coming here every night. You’ll think I’m getting a crush on you.”

Levi laughed. “I don’t think that could happen.”

Gus just shook his head. “Anyway, I want you to take off this weekend. I’ll step in and fill in for you here. This place seems to mostly run itself with whatever infernal machines you and Jon conspired to get. Go down Friday morning and get the place ready. Do whatever you need to do, then pick him up when he’s done at noon. Tomorrow you tell him I needed your help with something around the house and that you hate you won’t get to talk to him on the phone, but he can come by the bar as soon as he gets off the bus. Ya know, throw him off the trail.”

“Gus, you are a devious motherfucker.”

“That’s why you never want to piss me off. Oh, and two things. Sunday evening y’all are coming to my house for supper again.”

“Ok, and what’s the other?”

“You might want to find his swimsuit if he has one. If you can’t find it, go buy one for him because I’m pretty sure he didn’t pack one.”