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When Hardin spoke, I needed everything else to go silent just to hear him. He was quiet, almost like he was keeping his mouth closed as much as possible. June didn’t seem to have any problem hearing what he said, and from her reactions, most of what he said was funny as she would burst into short laughs.

Before coming to the ranch, I had looked it up online. I’d have been crazy not to, not more crazy than turning up to the ranch without proper shoes or even a coat, but those were major oversights I was never going to live down in either June or Hardin’s eyes.

Hardin lived at the main house which was close to the gated entry road. From there, there were branching paths in different directions and not a single signpost in sight. Hardin first showed me to the cabin. There were two guest cabins close to each other and sharing of one large wood hut where all the wood was kept and shared between the two for kindling.

The cabin was one story with two bedrooms, a large living area with a fire, and an wood-burning stove. I’d never seen so little technology before, I barely knew how to use half of the stuff in here. And it was freezing. I rubbed my hands together, remembering I’d also forgotten mittens too.

“Let’s get a fire started,” June said. “So that you’ve got somewhere toasty warm to come back to later.”

Hardin stood by the open cabin door. “You know how to do that?” he asked me.

“Not really.”

“I best show you then,” he said, “the last thing I want is you to catch your death in the cold from not having a working fire or stove.”

It took him and June around thirty minutes to show me the best way to chop firewood with the axe in the hut, and then how to use the best wood. If it was even a little wet, it was useless until dried out, otherwise it would smoke the cabin out and followed by a cautionary tale on someone they knew, not the same person, but they both died from smoke inhalation.

“Understood,” I said, feeling the need to also salute them like a private in the armed forced.

“Best practice is to cut the wood, bring it in, keep it close, and then you can use it. There is nothing worse than a fire going out because you’ve used all the wood,” he said. “It’s a rookie mistake, but in these weather conditions, I don’t want you to make them.”

June nodded along to everything. “I can’t relate to that exactly because I live in town, but it’s very important that you keep an eye on your wood stores.”

It wasn’t like I had much more to do other than work, and if I really was trying to get in my own way of not getting any work done, then I’d be staying on top of the wood stores and making sure there was always a fire burning. “I can do that,” I told them both with a big smile.

It was pretty easy to light the fire, using the accelerant and a flame. I was told that was only for starting the fire and never to add anymore of it, otherwise the entire place could go up in flames, and rescue wouldn’t be easy under these weather conditions. That was another reason to be scared about this whole thing, I knew going out in a blaze of glory was a thing, but going out in a blaze wasn’t something I wanted part of.

In some ways, they were good cop, bad cop as they explained how to manage the temperature of the house, and the only thing connected to any electrics was the water boiler that had to be turned on an hour before I wanted to use it, that meant baths and showers needed to be planned.

“Let’s continued the tour,” Hardin said as he head out of the door. “This place should heat up before you get back. And don’t, for the life of all that you hold holy, do not bang the door when shutting it, or the posts. I’m not always going to be around to come and save you if you get snowed in.” He rested a hand on the post of the small porch. “That includes banging your shoes on these as well.”

“Understood.” My face grew warm, maybe from being so close to the flames, or now from recalling the embarrassment of banging my boots against the wood fence and having snow almost cascade on top of me. “Do you have bears around here?”

Hardin smirked. “In Montana, we do. We’re home to both the grizzly and the black bear. I wouldn’t be worried too much about them. We have permitters up around the land, so we haven’t had a sighting on land in a couple years. Besides, it’s winter, they’re all most likely hauled up in some den somewhere. Definitely not on any open plain of land.”

“I’ve never seen one on the land personally,” June said. “Which is a shame because I think if I met one for reals, they’d want to be my friend, and I think we could create quite a unique bond.”

“Don’t listen to her,” he said. “Bears do not want to be friends, they want to tear you limb from up.”

“Not the type of bears I’ve been around then,” I remarked quietly.

“What’s that?” he asked.

I repeated myself, and he took it seriously, almost interrogating me on all my bear knowledge. “Well, one type of bear I’ve been around are of the teddy variety,” I said. “I write about teddy bears that come to life.”

Hardin hummed and turned, continuing on the tour.

June hooked her arm into mine. “What about that other type of bear?” she chuckled.

“Those are known to tear you up in a different way,” I giggled. I’d had my fair share of bigger men with hairy bods.

I caught Hardin giving us side eye as he turned his head slightly. “It’s mostly a loop,” he said as we approached a large red barn. Only the excitable dog had followed and ran ahead to the barn. “We have this barn, which is where all our animals are housed. The horses are in an adjoining stable.”

Recalling the animals June had mentioned, I was nervous to see how they would react to me. I wasn’t known to be an animal person, unless, again, we’re talking about beary men. “And they all fit in there?” I asked June who was closer.

“Yep,” she said. “The goats and chickens live together, although the chickens bully the goats. It’s large enough for them all to live.”

“And the cats, you mentioned, they live in there as well?”

“Yes, they do, they’re adopted pets,” she said. She turned quiet, pulling me in closer as we walked. “Hardin actually rescued them off the side of the road. He took them to the pet center in town but they had no room. They were going to euthanize them, but he wouldn’t let them, so he took them in and now they live here. Don’t tell him I told you that though. Remember, he likes to look tough.”

He looked back again, almost telling us he’d heard what was said. It seemed like he knew the role he had to play. I wouldn’t expect a cowboy any other way. I was still coming to terms with the fact that I had actually met a real life cowboy. I might have thought they died out with the whole western times.

The red barn had a large doorway and a smaller segmented doorway within it. “We don’t open the full door until spring now,” he said. “The animals stay inside most of the time, but if the ground is thawed, I will let them out on the ground for a little enrichment.”

Entering the barn, I didn’t know what I expected, but it was far different from this. It was a small animal city behind a small fenced area within the ground. The chickens had little houses dotted around and a small network of steps and planks so they could run around at different elevations. And in the corner of the barn, the two goats were at the fence, bleating at Hardin.

“Daisy, Marigold,” he said, dipping to a squat in front of them. “I hope you’re keeping out of trouble.” They fought with each other over who would get closer to Hardin as he tickled and stroked under their chins.

The flock of chickens rushed toward him, scaring the goats away.

“I thought chickens would run away,” I mumbled.

His dog yapped up at the ceiling.The two cats, one black, the other white teased from above in the rafters.

“Oh yeah, you’ll have to watch out for them,” June said. “They’ll sneak up on ya.”

I wondered if the network of wooden planks had been made for the cats benefit instead.

“They probably think I’ve come back in to feed them, or milk them,” Hardin said, snapping his fingers at his dog who hushed immediately. “They all get fed once a day, and the goats get milked twice a day. Which is what I’ll need your help with.”

“I’ve never milked a goat before.”

“I’d be surprised if you had,” June laughed. “There’s really nothing to it. In fact, it’s a bit like, you know, when you’re alone at night, and you don’t have anyone around, well, you just go in, grab, squeeze, and then—”

“Please,” Hardin stopped her before she got carried away with the visual, and what a visual she was painting to, but I actually understood it might not have been as difficult. “I’ll show you later. I use goat milk as milk and to make cheeses. The eggs are also used too, so you can help yourself.”

“Will I need to collect the eggs as well?”

He nodded. “Each morning, but they’ve been collected today.”

“Speaking of, I’ll be happy to take some off your hands while I’m here,” June said.

“Already fixed you a carton up at the house,” he said. “And the cats, Midnight and Snowflake, they do their own thing, and they live in here.”

We went from the barn to the stable off at the side. That’s where I came face-to-face with a horse, sticking its head out of a small window. It neighed in my face, flashing it’s very large and scary teeth at me. I almost stumbled back into the snow. I didn’t want to make face planting a thing while I was here, thankfully June was at me side, keeping me standing.

“That’s Scout,” he said. “And this window should be closed. Did you open it?” he asked, I glanced to June, but he was talking to the horse. “Horses are intelligent animals, especially this one.”

Each of the horses had windows, all but Scout’s was closed. The stable itself was almost the same size as the barn. There were rooms for each of the horses. Two of them laid on the hay, while Scout was making most of the noise, sticking his head out of the fence on the inside.

“We have Belle,” he said, gesturing to a white horse with black markings. “She loves people. She’s the one we get people to ride when they’re new.”

“I’ve never ridden a horse.”

“I know,” he said. “But I like to get them out, so you’ll be able to help me with that as well.”

My crotch hurt at the idea of it. I’d seen people ride horses on TV, and it never looked comfortable at all. How did people keep their balls from being swallowed back up inside themselves? “I guess there’s a first time for everything.”

June snorted. “That’s the spirit. When my kids were younger, they would come up here and help out with the horses. They’re very friendly. Even Thunder.”

Thunder was the last horse aggressively neighing. I didn’t want to get too close. I’d heard stories of the damage a horse could do, and I didn’t want to be on the receiving end of it. “I’ll stick with Belle.” The only horse that didn’t look like it a burning passion to buck me off in its eyes.

“That’s pretty much it,” Hardin said. “And then, if we go back out and around, we’ll come across the workshop and garage area. There’s a snowmobile in there, which I’ll probably need to utilize at some point, and a plough for the times when a shovel won’t do.” He led us back out of the stable, and gestured to the large metal shed. “You won’t need anything from there.”

“Understood.” I didn’t really understand, but it was an easy way to end things. I just wanted to get back to the cabin, unpack, and tell my friends all about this place. My stomach, slowly unknotting itself after coming face-to-face with Hardin. The dread continued to exist in the pit, but it wasn’t quite as intense.

June’s instincts said what I felt, and we walked back to my cabin, where I was left with a goodbye and wave, and some words I knew I was about to hear, but thought it might never come. June with her wholesome smile, delivered the blow. “You’ll have plenty of time to work because we don’t have much signal or WiFi on the property.”

My smile visibly faded as I walked into the cabin and the immediate warmth hit me. “Fuck,” I grumbled. I suppose this is why my agent sent me all the way out here then. He was forcing me to get the work done but packaged the idea with a cute bow, telling me it would be a nice vacation.

As I got out of the large coat and pulled away the tight binding of the boots Hardin had fixed on my feet, I realized I’d left my shoes on the porch. And then the knot came again, recalling the way I’d banged my shoes against the wood beam and called forth that cascade of snow from the roof.

I sat in front of the fireplace on the shag rug. It was almost like being on a beach with the heat blasting me. Relaxing for a moment, I knew I had to double check whether they were telling the truth about the awful cell service conditions.

From my bag, I pulled out my phone. No service. No signal. No life. I had to assume my friends and manager would put their feelers out into the universe and just know I was fine, or maybe they assumed like I’d been living for the last couple of months and I become a hermit the moment I landed.

Laying back on the bed, I stared at the wooden beams of the cabin ceiling. This was all going to be ok. What was the worst thing that could happen? I find a bodice ripper novel hiding somewhere and let it consume me, or I actually got on with work, and surprised even myself by hitting a deadline.

“No distractions,” I mumbled. “I am the distraction.” At least I had some stuffies to play with, and most of my clothes where lined onesies to keep me warm for the colder nights. There were worse places for me to let my little side out. And being alone gave me the freedom to find a little more fun.