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Chapter 17

Team Chat

Ryder: Someone needs to explain to me why Tyler always gets his own room.

Sully: Maybe you should mind your own business.

Ryder: What? Why? Clearly, there’s a way to make this happen, and that’s what I need to do?

Sully: Why, Rookie? You room with me.

Ryder: Exactly.

Sully: What’s that supposed to mean?

Dylan: It means he doesn’t like your superstitious rituals.

Sully: There is nothing wrong with my rituals. They mean something.

Dylan: No, they don’t.

Darius: Bro, are you still meditating in your old college shirt?

Ryder: If by old you mean the one that doesn’t fit him anymore, yes. He looks like a fucking Buddha sitting in the middle of the bed with his legs crossed, his stomach hanging out, and he’s got ten smelly candles lit on the bed with him. He’s just asking to light himself on fire.

Titan:

Bryan: Ten for ten years in the league

Camden: Did you know that meditation has numerous benefits for both your physical and mental health? It’s been proven to improve performance, focus, and injury recovery.

Sully: Thank you, Superman.

Dylan: Shit no one needs to know. This is why you’re single. You bore your dates to death with useless knowledge.

Camden: What makes you think I’m single?

Dylan: You’re not???

Camden: Wouldn’t you like to know?

Titan:

Sully: I once stayed at an eco-village in Costa Rica and learned about meditation and transformation. We all know actions speak louder than words, but when you align your actions with a purpose, magical things can happen.

Rico: Magical things. That’s the grass talking that they slipped into your food.

Sully: There was no grass.

Ryder: Who are you?

Bryan: I remember that retreat. Those pictures of the monkeys were lit.

Ryder: Is that why you have a monkey tattoo? All that grass and you were swinging from the trees together?

Dylan: Since when do you have a monkey tattoo?

Ryder: It’s on his thigh.

Rico: I don’t even want to know how you know this, and we don’t after all these years.

Ryder: Bro, I told you . . . Buddha!

Titan:

Bryan: He wasn’t swinging with the monkeys, but they were definitely chilling together, if you know what I mean.

Titan:

Sully: There was no grass! And I like monkeys and tattoos. You know, we could all get a matching one.

C rickets.

Sully: Hello?

Sully: Anyone?

Ryder: (Whispers . . . Tyler . . . save me)

Sully: What-the fuck-ever. But I’ll leave you with this, “Quiet the mind and the soul will speak.”