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“In the meantime, you need to stay off social media. People are going to have a lot to say about this, so please don’t go digging your hole even deeper, and respond back to them.

Right now, the focus needs to be on your apology, and getting ready for your album that’s getting ready to release.

Before I let you go, I want to give you a heads up with something.

A lot of these brand deals that you currently have, be prepared for some of them to drop you.

A lot of the deals you have, they’re tied to major companies that have LGBTQ representatives, customers, and they take that kind of disrespect seriously.

Personally, I feel like the album will do well.

It won’t hurt your music that much, but some of your bags?

Be prepared for them to stop,” I had to keep it real with her, so that this shit didn’t come out of nowhere later, when shit started going viral about some of her brand deals choosing to part ways with her.

When I explained that to her, she grew quite, and I knew that she was hurt by my choice of words.

“Give me about an hour and a half, and I’ll call you back with something,” I let her know. She responded that that was fine, and then we hung up.

I tossed the phone on the table, and I slouched down in my chair, wanting to scream.

I took one day off from work yesterday, so that I could finalize my divorce, and I walked back into the office today to bullshit.

I thought that today would be a smooth, quite day, especially since it had started off right with the flowers, and everything waiting for me in my office, but I guess not.

8:49 p.m.

“Creed, pick those shorts up! You would think that you would get tired of me saying the same thing to you all the time, and just do it without me having to correct you!” I went off on my son the second that he walked his ass in the kitchen.

He’d been upstairs, taking his shower, and everything, and now he was walking into the kitchen with his blue, cotton material Ralph Lauren shorts, and they were sagging slow, showing off the white, Calvin Klein briefs that were under them.

He came in with his shirt off, and because it was off, you could see just how ripped my son was.

His arms were huge, he had a six pack, and he was overly strong.

The boys didn’t play about the time that they would put in at the gym.

Law was in the gym faithfully, and he would often take the boys with him, and that was one of the many ways that the three of them would bond.

“It’s actually the other way around, ma. I be thinking that you going to get tired of telling me to pull them up, and eventually stop doing it,” he shot, coming over to me, and I reached my hand out, and hit him on his chest for being a smart ass.

He came behind me, and he wrapped his arms around me, putting me in a bear hug, and placed wet kisses on my cheeks.

My boys were very affectionate, just like their dad, and I were, but Creed had it worst. Since he was a baby, if he could live in my skin, he would try to do it.

No matter how hard he was, or how mannish, this boy loved his mama, and he wasn’t afraid to show it, or say it.

Even though he was my most affectionate child, he was also the child to try me in ways that Legend would never.

I drank wine out of the bottle because of Creed.

He had his days where his mouth would be too slick, he could be very rebellious, and he thought that he was grown, and it was always my duty to bring his ass back to reality.

“I thought you said that by the time I took a shower, and washed my face and stuff that the food would be done? I’m starving,” he complained the second he let go of me.

I think I heard ‘I’m starving’ from him, and his brother at least one hundred times a day.

The two of them were going to eat me out of a home.

I was standing over the stove, doing one last mix of the dinner that I’d prepared tonight.

My boys loved any kind of seafood, so tonight, I’d opted on blackened salmon alfredo with spinach.

Inside, I’d added sun- dried tomatoes, and we were having this over fettuccine.

As fancy as it sounded, it took under an hour to prepare.

My boys loved garlic rolls, so I had that in the oven, and in about another minute or two, it would be ready to come out.

“Every time I see you, you’re talking about your starving. Me vuelves loco con eso, Creed,”( You drive me crazy with that, Creed).

When the boys got me to star speaking Spanish to them, that’s when I knew that they’d managed to get me fired up.

I spoke Spanish fluently. The first five years of my life, when my dad was living with us, he made sure that Sarai and I were not only fluent in English, but Spanish as well.

This man was so head strong on us knowing Spanish, just as much as we knew English that even when he was locked up, and deported back to the Dominican Republic, he would call Sarai and I, and we would literally have lessons over the phone.

My mom loved his ass so much that he’d taught her Spanish as well.

Long before we even came into the picture, he’d taught my mom how to speak his language, and I felt like that was so adorable that she was willing to learn a different language for her man.

I’d dropped the ball with my kids because I didn’t teach them how to speak it fluently, but they understood it though.

They could say the basics, carry certain conversations, but it just wasn’t fluent enough.

“I saw your girl showing out on Instagram live. I can’t wait until I turn eighteen.

I’m going right for her. That’s the kind of ladies that I’m into.

I love those pretty girls that be ghetto like that.

Autumn so fine to me,” he shared, as he jumped up on the counter, and I rolled my eyes at his choice of words.

I’ve been hearing about his and Legend’s crushes since they’ve been in daycare.

“Your ass needs to focus on school. You don’t need to be worried about Autumn, or any other girl for that matter,” I said, and at the same time, Legend had made his way into the kitchen.

He’d been upstairs, showering too. He went over, and he stood by his brother, ready to take part in the conversation that we were having.

“I saw that stuff earlier about Autumn on social media. She was talking crazy on that live, but I personally feel like she redeemed herself when she went live earlier, and she apologized. I see it’s a lot of controversy about it, and I really don’t think that girl is homophobic.

Her delivery was just wrong. To me, her apology seemed authentic.

Ya’ll did a good job with cleaning that up, ma.

I did see some people say that they weren’t going to support her new album, but I can’t wait for it to drop.

She already previewed one of the songs on TikTok other day, and it sounds like it’s going to be one of those albums where it has no skips,” Legend responded.

I smiled at my son, loving his take on the situation.

Around six this evening, Autumn had gone live.

I’d joined the live as well, and I saw that she had over one million viewers tuned in.

We’d given her clear instructions to turn the comments off because people were still mad at her, and they were going to be trolling her in the comments, purposely saying stuff to get up under her skin.

She touched on the key points that I’d given her earlier, and she made sure to take accountability of her choice of words, and she sincerely apologized.

It felt real. It looked real. So many people had given her grace, just calling it out, saying how young she was, the guidance that she lacked, and they could even spot out that the people she was hanging with just weren’t in her best interest. I had faith that my girl would shake back from this, and hopefully after this, she would stay her ass off fuckin Instagram live.

Five minutes later, the boys were at the table, and I’d fixed their plates, bringing them over.

If Law was here, he would have cursed me out for doing that.

According to him, they were grown men, and could fix their own plates, but my boys were my babies, and I didn’t mind doing it for them.

The way I saw it, I only had two more years of them living in the house with me.

They both had plans of going off for college.

I wanted to soak up every second that I had left with them because it was going to break my little heart when they left.

I fixed my plate as well, coming over with a glass of wine for me. Legend blessed the food for us, and they immediately dug in, telling me how good the food was.

“Dad texted us earlier. He wants to take us one of these weekends to see grandma. No offense ma, and I swear that I’m not trying to be rude, but nobody wants to see that crazy lady.

Man, she be tripping. The last time he took us to see her, she was wilding.

She started screaming when we came in the room, and she tried fighting us.

I feel bad for her, and everything, but dang, I don’t like going down there to see her,” Creed shared with me.

Back when the boys were younger, Law wouldn’t take them to go and see his mom.

Because she was in a facility, you just never really knew the kind of state of mind that she would be in.

Law thought that it would be something that would scare the boys, so he didn’t start taking them to see her until they were around 7.

She had her days when she would sit there, and be stubborn, not even acknowledging the boys.

Then, she would have her days when she would cut up, screaming and stuff, like what Creed had just mentioned.

Over the years of me being in Solace’s life, I’ve gone to see her plenty.

There were even times that I would go without Law.

I wasn’t afraid of her. I just had to remind myself that she was different, and she couldn’t control her actions.

Her mind was different from ours. She lost Knox, and from the love stories that I’ve heard about them through people in Miami, or even Dutch, who was Knox’s best friend, I knew that Knox was Solace’s person.

Shortly after losing Knox, her mom died two years later.

I prayed for her all the time. There were times that I would have to thank God that I didn’t lose my mind to that extent after my daughter died. That shit broke me, but for whatever reason, I had been able to keep my sanity.

“Creed, I know. It’s hard seeing her like that.

You just have to remember that her actions aren’t being done purposely.

Her mind is different from ours, so she can’t control her actions.

She loves you both. I’m sure she does. She just doesn’t know how to show it.

Give her grace,” I let him know, reaching my hand out, and putting it on his back, since he was sitting right next to me.

He nodded his head, dropping it, and finished with his food.

“So, you miss pops, yet? Be honest, too,” Legend broke the silence, and I laughed at his question.

“No, I don’t,” I replied.

“Yeah, aight. I don’t believe that,” he was quick with his response.

“Me, and Law haven’t been together in over a year. Nothing has changed. The only difference is that we’re divorced now,” I shared.

“So, if pops were to pull up right now, just to drop something off for us, and he had a girl in the passenger seat with him. You wouldn’t feel any kind of way about that?” Legend asked.

“For one, your daddy would never come to my house with another woman. He wouldn’t even try me like that-

“That’s not the point I’m making. Would you feel some kind of way in general if you see him out with another woman?” Legend asked, cutting me off. I laughed at his question, as I added a piece of the blackened salmon to my fork, and I mixed it around with the fettuccine.

“Your dad is single, and free to do what he wants. I wouldn’t care,” I said.

“That don’t even sound convincing. The second you see pops out with another woman, you gone get on the phone with grandma, auntie Shai, and Milan, and you gone be crying. Your chest gone hurt. Stop trying to play big gangsta with us,” that was Creed that jumped in, giving his two cents.

I just waved him off. I wasn’t too gangsta to admit that I probably would get in my feelings if I saw Law out with another woman.

Just like Creed said, my chest would probably hurt, but I would eventually get over it.

Law was a handsome man. He was successful, good looking, and he had good dick, just to name a few.

He would have no problem getting a woman, just like how I wouldn’t have any problem getting a nigga.

I just wasn’t in the market of looking for one right now.