Page 196 of The Wicked

I could be fucking the enemy, and the only thought in my mind—the only thought that had been in my mind that night was the fact that I longed for the next time I got to experience being that close to her again.

The heat, the obscene connection that had me wanting to tear off my outrageous affirmation and kiss her back into arousal, the burning need still lingering in me even after I’d had the most mind-altering sex in all my thirty-three years of living.

I’d had orgasms with the few women I’d been with, but I never thought it could feel like that… I never thought thefeeling could soften every nerve ending in a human body and make them feel content with just the sight of the person who had caused it.

If she had been my first, I would have waved it off as the normal way it should feel, but she wasn’t my first. She wasn’t the first woman I’d desired, but she was the first to elicit such emotions from me.

I was craving a forbidden fruit that might very well drag me to the darkest pits of hell—but this was also where my gut feeling kicked in; if she had been trying to harm me in any way, I would have picked it up by now, but I had a feeling that whatever game she was playing had nothing to do with me. She was only using my name and the protection and connections I had to offer.

I wouldn’t have cared. Zahra wasn’t the first to use me or the power my name held. I had no desire to stop whatever she was doing; as long as it didn’t alter my goal, she was free to use me however she pleased. Maybe she would open up later on… or perhaps I was just delusional, and my gut feelings were broken, and she was indeed after something that could alter my goals and stop me from burning this hell to the ground; maybe I should kill her, kill her before I fell deeper into this obvious hole I had been conveniently ignoring… Maybe, I don’t know… maybe I was finally losing my mind. Maybe I should stop thinking about—

A sharp beeping sound, followed by a vibration, had my attention turned to the lit-up phone screen by the bedside table.

It was connected to a charger I didn’t remember putting there.

Angelo, with his creepy behavior, was beginning to crawl his way up my nerves. I made a mental note to have a lengthy discussion with him about the importance of my privacy…again.

I settled on the side of the bed, unplugged the phone, and unlocked it.

There were four messages from Gemma, nine from Zahra, and one from Angelo.

I opened Angelo’s first.

Today

Angelo Mancini (Ex-consigliere):

Casmiro’s awake and doing all right. I didn’t want to call because I knew you were on your pills. I stopped by yesterday afternoon to check on you. I’m about to call again, if you don’t pick up, call me whenever you get this message, or I’ll stop by again.

1 min ago

In the next minute, he was calling. I picked up on the first ring.

“Finally. I was about to stop by with a doctor.”

“How is he?” I asked, ignoring his remark.

“Looking good. He’s resting now.”

I closed my eyes for a few seconds, reveling in the relief that flooded through me. “Did he ask for me?”

“Yes. I told him you weren’t in the compound. He thinks you’re out there with soldiers actively looking for the people who did this. He also chewed me a new one for not going with you.”

“Tell him I’m back and will come to see him soon. Thanks for covering for me.”

Casmiro could not find out about this. About my mental health problems. He was better off not knowing—one less person to worry about.

“Will you ever tell him? About your—”

“Thank you for the information, Angelo. Do not text me next time unless it is for a significant emergency. The keyword there issignificant. Am I clear?”

I heard him sigh from the other end of the line.

“Okay, Marino.”

“In addition, I think it is very weird for you to walk into mybedroom and change its setting to make me feel comfortable. While it is very much appreciated, I would not like it to happen again.”

“What—”