Page 36

EMMA

TEN YEARS AFTER THE WALK OFF

“ M om, come on, we’re gonna be late!” Alice shouts down the hall as I finish getting dressed. Jax is already at the soccer field, holding down the fort and saving seats for the rest of the family, and Mackenzie is getting ready for her final match of the season with our local developmental pro soccer team, a part of the same league that I spent my summers playing in during college.

When Mackenzie was approached to play, she sat her dad and me down and listed the pros and cons, and asked us for our input. I’m biased, as I’ve spent time in this league and am grateful for the experiences that I had playing in different settings than school fields and university teams. Mackenzie is one of the youngest on the team, and I stressed to her that there was no pressure from me, and never will be. If she doesn’t want to play in college, or after this summer, that is fine with me. And her dad.

It has been a joy to watch her this season. Alice and I have been to every single match, even the ones on the road, and Jax has come to the ones that his schedule allows. We’ve all blocked out time tonight. Mackenzie’s team has made it to the league championship after a hard fought season, and tonight the whole family is coming to cheer her on. Marcus and Jenna have flown in from Montana, my parents drove over from Boston, and all three sets of grandparents have matching jerseys to wear tonight.

“I’m coming!” I yell down the hall, slipping into my shoes and grabbing my keys as I meet Alice at the door. “You ready?”

“I’ve been ready,” she rolls her eyes and walks out the door, smiling all the way.

Alice and Mackenzie have grown into such amazing young women, and I’m overjoyed at the strides they are both making. Mackenzie is making waves on the pitch and Alice is excelling in music. Our girl realized that music helped her focus on her schoolwork, and wanted to learn to make music herself. She started by working on guitar with her dad, and when the time came to try out band instruments at school, she fell in love with the cello, and we’ve been listening to her fall more in love with it ever since.

She’s heading to fine arts college in a couple of weeks and I’m trying to prepare myself for moving her to the city, and I know I’m not ready for it. It was hard enough moving Mackenzie to Michigan to attend her dad’s alma mater, so at least Alice will be nearby…but the house will be so quiet without them both here; without Alice’s constant music and Mackenzie’s soccer analysis. But I can’t think about that today, today we have a match to get to.

Alice and I find our way to our seats and are greeted by the whole family with hugs and high fives, just in time for the announcement of starting lineups and the embarrassingly loud cheer that erupts from our section when Mackenzie is introduced.

“She looks good out there,” Jax wraps an arm around my waist after sitting down with a box of popcorn to share. “Reminds me of you.”

“I can’t take any credit for this,” I laugh reaching for the popcorn, my fingers brushing against my husband’s. “This is all Mackenize.”

The clock ticks toward ninety minutes, and Mackenzie hasn’t slowed down, the game is tied and I know their coach is thinking ahead to stoppage time and potential penalty kicks, going easy on late game substitutions, and I’m growing more and more anxious. I haven’t coached above middle school age in years, and can’t imagine making game time decisions in the heat of a game like this, with everything on the line.

The ball is passed to Mackenzie who streaks toward the goal, looking for a shot, for an open teammate, any opportunity to get the ball in the net, and I recognize the minute she finds it. With a few touches, Mackenzie rockets the ball to the center forward who shoots at the goal, sending the ball into the back corner of the net. Mackenzie and her teammates wrap each other in a quick hug, celebrating for just a moment before getting back to the game. They still have time on the clock, and only lead by a single goal.

We’re all on our feet as the final whistle blows, and no one leaves or sits down until the cup has been presented and we’ve all seen Mackenzie hoist it over her head. Alice is giddy to find her sister after the match and Jax and I hang back as the girls celebrate together.

It’s been ten years since Jax and I married and I adopted the girls. Ten years of learning how to be a mom, how to navigate the pre-teen and teenage years, the reminders that I’m not the one who gave birth to them – and reminding them in turn that while I didn’t give birth to them, I chose them, and will continue to choose and love them until the end of my days.

Them, and the man whose hand I’m holding. The man who has been a rock for me these last ten years. Jax wraps an arm around my waist and pulls me close, pressing a kiss to my cheek before we’re joined by the girls.

“Mom!” Mackenzie squeals, throwing her arms around me.

“Great match, kid!” I squeeze her tight. “What a way to end your season.”

Mackenzie pulls me aside, away from the gathered crowd and our family, with tears in her eyes she takes something from her pocket, holding it tightly in her hand.

“I never would have gotten here without you,” she says, fidgeting with whatever is in her hand. “I want you to have this.”

Mackenzie holds out the captain’s armband that she wore tonight while on the field. I take it from her hands and run my fingers over the familiar bit of fabric, similar to one that I wore so many times over the course of my career, and one that I know she’ll find herself wearing again.

“I am so proud of you,” I wipe tears from my eyes as I wrap my daughter up in my arms, “and I can’t wait to see where you go from here.”

“You wouldn’t be disappointed if…” she trails off, eyes not meeting mine. “If I didn’t…”

“Mackenzie,” I grip her shoulders, looking her in the eyes. “The only thing that would disappoint me is if you did something because you thought you had to. Or because you were afraid you’d disappoint me or your dad.”

“I’m not going to quit,” she laughs. “I was going to ask if you’d be disappointed if I took Alice and the cousins to dinner tonight, instead of going out with you and Dad.”

“I suppose,” I pretend to be offended. “Your dad and I will fend for ourselves.”

Mackenzie waves Jax over, and he joins us, wrapping an arm around my waist and pressing a kiss to my cheek. “The reason I want to take Alice and the cousins to dinner tonight is because I’m leaving earlier than we thought.”

“Leaving?” Jax asks. “Like heading back to school?”

“Not exactly…” Mackenzie smiles, tears rimming her eyes. “I’m heading to Chicago for a match. You guys can come if you want to. We’re playing Canada.”

“Mackenzie,” Jax is barely containing his emotion. “Who is we ?”

“The National Team.”

I’m as nervous as I’ve ever been as we sit in the stands pre-game, and the stadium bustles around us. I remember what it was like to be on that field. What it was like to play in this stadium. Wearing the national team emblem on my chest. And tonight I get to watch my daughter take the field and do the same thing. In this place where I spent my entire professional career. This place that holds so many memories, and tonight, as a family, we get to make new ones.

I’m sandwiched between Jax and Alice, and Alice is buzzing with nervous energy that outmatches my own.

“When I talked to her this morning she still didn’t know if she’d be starting,” Alice bounces her legs up and down. “Do you think she’ll get in the game?”

“It’s hard to know,” I put my arm around Alice’s shoulders and she stills her nervous movement. “But look down there at the field…”

I point at the group of players wearing green vests over their kits, the subs, and then direct Alice’s attention to the group nearby, the group kicking the ball around in a passing drill. No vests.

“Is that her? Is she starting?”

“Looks like it.”

And she does.

My girl is a force on the field. When she’s taken out with a bad tackle, she jumps to her feet and keeps going. She defends the ball well and strikes even better. Even in my prime, I didn’t play as well as Mackenzie is playing tonight. And I couldn’t be prouder of her.

Jax sits beside me, tense, for the entire game, breathing a sigh of relief when the final whistle blows and we watch as Mackenzie celebrates on the field with her team. Alice stands and lets out an ear-splitting whistle before high fiving everyone around us. I watch Mackenzie turn and survey the stadium as the crowd begins filtering out, the minute she sees the three of us in the stands she waves us down to her and we make our way to the front row of seats.

“Mom!” She throws her arms around my neck as I lean down to meet her. “Coach wants to see you.”

“I always knew you’d get here someday,” I tell the young coach as she approaches Mackenzie on the sideline before reaching up her hand to shake mine. “I’m proud of you, Lorena.”

“Thanks . If you ever want to…I’ve got a place for you on my staff.”

“I appreciate the offer,” I take Jax’s hand in mine and wrap my other arm around Alice’s shoulders. “But there’s only room enough for one Hutchinson on your team. You don’t need me.”

“Special consultant, maybe?” Lorena grins.

“Maybe. For now, I’d like to let Mackenzie stretch her wings.”

Lorena nods, walking away and corralling her team into the locker room, as Jax, Alice, and I get ready to meet up with Mackenzie. When Alice spots her sister, the two run to meet each other with wide open arms, and Jax draws me against him as we watch the girls celebrate.

I never dreamed I’d be a mom, let alone a soccer mom. And I never dreamed that one day I’d be back in this stadium, where I got my profession start, watching my daughter start for the National Team.

“Can you believe it?” Jax asks, pressing a kiss to the top of my head. “Look at our girl.”

“She’s pretty great, isn’t she?”

“They both are.” Jax turns me in his arms and presses a kiss to my forehead. “We never would have gotten here without you.”