Page 18

CHAPTER EIGHT

IN WHICH THE HEROINE’S ICY HEART SHOWS SIGNS OF THAWING

When the sun dipped out of sight, bathing the terrain in shadows, I made my move.

A change of clothes bundled in my arms, I stepped out of my tent.

Quiet voices chattered away in the tents beside me, only just audible above the deep croaking calls of the fae equivalent of frogs.

I was paying too much attention to where my feet landed and not enough to my surroundings.

As a result, the sound of a throat clearing made me jump.

“Sorry! I didn’t mean to startle you.”

I whirled about, ready to give the offender a firm scolding, but the words died in my throat when I saw it was Luthri.

His still-damp hair framed his square face in waves.

He sat by the fire pit, which was a nest of sand and ashes by now.

The location put him only a few steps from my tent.

My eyes narrowed as he sprang to his feet.

“Were you waiting for me?” I inquired. Maybe we’d be having that ‘talk’ sooner than I’d expected. Starting with “I don’t like to be surprised at night while heading out to bathe.”

Lu brightened. “Oh, yes!”

At the way my brows drew down in warning, the smile dropped from his face. “Er… no? Not exactly. Well, I hoped to ca tch you, but it didn’t have to be now. If you’d rather… It’s just that Daethie said the other day that you liked the scent of vali soap, and I…”

He fumbled for a moment before thrusting out a handful of fabric.

“Daethie has a big mouth. What is this?”

“It’s an oil for the skin and hair,” he explained with some degree of pride, quickly unwrapping the fabric to reveal a small, stoppered jar of golden liquid.

“It cleanses and softens. Moisturizes. I wanted to offer it to you, in case you didn’t have…

Well, no, I’m sure you have something, but in case you wanted to try something new. It’s a gift.”

The jar stared me down. Was it innocent or a bribe? Could I trust that if I accepted this, there would be no expectations put upon me later? He’s being nice, you pessimist, just being nice. Like with the salve, only this time it was more personal. That was the part I didn’t care for.

“Ah. So this is the secret behind your good looks.” The quip broke the silence but did little to mitigate the uncomfortable lump that had developed in my chest.

“Well, no, that would be my father. A bath oil can only do so much, I’m afraid.”

I blinked, so deep in thought that it took a moment for his response to register. Once it did, the tension drained from my body. At least he didn’t seem bothered by my hesitation… Then again, he had no idea what thoughts circulated behind my skull.

“Thank you.” I reached for the oil.

Lu pressed it into my palm. “You’re welcome.”

He held it there for perhaps half a second longer than was necessary, a full second after my fingers had closed around it. I wasn’t sure why that was something worth noticing, but it was. He kept speaking, his tone light. “If you need a hand applying it, you know where to find me.”

That was the Luthri I expected. Letting the hand that held the bottle fall to my side, I allowed the smile I’d been pushing down to rise to the surface.

“Oh, we’re not nearly close enough for me to inconvenience you like that,” I crooned, each word dripping with saccharine sweetness. “But I appreciate the offer.”

“It would be my pleasure, truly,” he countered, similarly sweet.

Shaking my head, I turned to go.

“When was the last time you let someone else take care of you, Mar?”

His soft-spoken question hit me in the back like an arrow tip, making my shoulders tense and my steps falter. I recentered my thoughts to keep my temper in check.

“I don’t need someone to take care of me,” I said without turning around.

“I know,” Lu assured me. “But most of us are social creatures. We’re meant to have not just company, but family, comrades. People who look after us when we’re unwell or lacking energy. People we rely on to have our interests at heart. Is that not also true for hyumin?”

Branches snapped underfoot as he made his way over. He left a degree of space between us, but somehow I could still feel his breath against my nape. A shiver ran down my spine.

“Humans.” My free hand balled into a fist at my side.

I wasn’t antisocial; I was selective about whom I trusted.

Who would blame me? Since I was a child, everyone I came across wanted to use me for their own gain.

Right now, Vee, Jük, and Ked were the only people I considered real family.

The others I enjoyed having around, but as far as trust went…

“And what about you?” I swiveled back around to face him.

Lu was closer than I had expected, only an arm’s length between us.

I refused to fidget under his piercing gaze.

Releasing a shuddering breath, I continued.

“You travel by yourself. Flirt with anyone who’ll lend you an ear.

No doubt you had a different person in your bed every night, yet now you sleep alone.

Does that superficial half-life give you the right to judge?

The way I see it, you and I aren’t all that different. ”

“The difference between you and me is that I would let another person close.” Luthri’s hand came up, reaching for my face.

Without intending to, I recoiled. Something flashed across his face, gone as quickly as it had appeared, but he withdrew his hand and let it fall.

Clearing his throat, he continued. “Being vulnerable is not always a weakness.

Most people hope for a connection with someone they can be vulnerable around, whether they realize it or not.

“If I had a person like that in my life, I would cherish them. My priority would be to learn them so completely that I could anticipate their every need without a word. I would consider it a blessing to have them invade my waking thoughts and be the last thing I think of before sleep takes me. I would give everything I have and everything I am, even if fate itself stood against us, because there is peace to be found in that kind of surrender. Would you?”

Luthri knew how to hit where it hurt. Rather than dissect the thread of sadness his words elicited, I kept my attention trained on a pretty five-pointed leaf to my left. “I haven’t met anyone who deserved that.”

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Lu’s expression soften.

He swayed ever so slightly, almost as though he wanted to haul me into an embrace but stopped himself through sheer force of will.

“I hope you’ll let me know when you do,” he said softly, the words hanging between us as frail as a strand of spider silk standing against the breeze.

I didn’t respond. If this was a dance, it was done far too close to danger and with no regard for consequences. There was no inviting whatever this was. No giving in to temptation, no thinking about what this could be, no chance of making an irreversible mistake.

He was an attractive man, and a charming one. But couldn’t be more than that .

Without giving him an answer, I whirled around and made for the water. Each step fell heavy with the weight of my emotions. Luckily, Luthri knew what was good for him and didn’t follow. I wouldn’t have appreciated having to put him in his place.

My bath was only somewhat satisfying, but the oil did smell wonderful.

With Yrra’s help and some attractive trinkets provided by Lu, we convinced the waterfolk to take us across the river on floating rafts they used as beds.

Their assistance saved us a couple of days of travel and a host of headaches.

No sooner had we landed on the other side than the male passed the trinkets to his most favored wives.

They began to purr—an odd, sultry clicking not unlike the sound of a spinning bicycle wheel—and rub themselves against his body.

We got the hell out of dodge before the orgy started.

The days after that passed uneventfully, thank the Goddess. We rose with the sun each morning and walked until dusk, stopping for bathroom breaks and meals. Before I knew it, it had been another week, and our limited supplies were nearly depleted.

With a sizable distance before the next town, we were forced to dedicate a large portion of time to foraging for food.

Most of the edible plants near the road were picked clean, but Luthri redeemed himself for his past hunting failure by catching a young forest pig.

It was none too soon, judging by the dark clouds on the horizon, as beautiful as they were ominous.

We were prepared to call it an early night, but the pig was not the only surprise Lu came back with.

“I saw a building out that way,” he said, raising an arm to point. “I’m not sure if it’s inhabited. It didn’t look that promising from a distance, but it might be worth checking out. It’s another span’s walk, but not too far out of the way. ”

“Think there’s food there?” Daethie’s wings fluttered with excitement.

“I have no idea,” Lu answered. “It wasn’t on the map, so it could be an old hunter’s shack, a rural cabin, an abandoned woodshed, anything. At the least, we could have a solid roof over our heads.” He studied our grim expressions. “You find anything?”

“Not much. A few handfuls of bitterweed and some bark that will be edible once we boil it to death.” I nodded at Vyrain, who carried our disappointing haul. “I hoped for something more nutritious, but this area is picked clean. I guess it makes sense, being so close to the road.”

“I’m not complaining.” Hohem eyed the carcass dangling from Lu’s hand with undisguised hunger. “Let’s get a move on so we can get that thing cooked. Lead the way.”

Daethie made a rough landing on Yrra’s pack and tucked her legs under the handle like a seatbelt. Looking forward to a break, we trudged after Luthri into the darkening woods.