Page 22 of The Spanish Daughter (The Lost Daughters #5)

21

LONDON, 1939

Valentina straightened her shoulders and lifted her hand to knock again on the door of Hope’s House. Inside she was a ball of nerves, but she tried her best to stand confidently as she waited for the door to open. There was a noise on the other side, but just when Valentina thought no one would ever answer, the door swung open.

‘Sorry to keep you waiting,’ said the dark-haired woman. She wore her hair pulled back into a soft bun, with some tendrils escaping around her face, and she was much, much younger than Valentina had expected. She also had a warmth about her that immediately put her at ease. ‘You must be Valentina.’

She nodded. ‘I am. And you are Hope?’ Valentina half expected her to say that Hope was her mother, or that she just worked there. In her mind, the woman running a place like this would be no-nonsense and straight-faced; the complete opposite of the person standing in front of her.

‘That’s me. Now please, come in and let me help you with your bags.’

‘I’m travelling light at the moment,’ Valentina said, trying not to be embarrassed by her modest belongings. ‘I had to leave Argentina in something of a hurry.’

‘Well, I’m just pleased that your English is so good,’ Hope said with a warm smile. ‘I wasn’t certain how well we’d be able to communicate, but I can see that we’ll be just fine.’

‘I learnt as a schoolgirl,’ Valentina said, aware that she had a thick accent despite her ability to converse in the language. ‘But being here in London has helped my language skills greatly. I’ve been here for a little while now.’

Hope indicated where she should leave her bags and led her into the kitchen, and Valentina was relieved that she didn’t ask more about the time she’d already spent in England. ‘Would you like tea? I’ve just made some sandwiches, and I’d very much like to catch my breath outside on the veranda. It’s been a long day.’

Valentina stepped forward to help. ‘Please, let me take these and meet you outside. I can find my way.’

Hope seemed grateful for the assistance. ‘Through the living room there,’ she said. ‘We can make the most of the sunshine.’

Valentina took the plate of sandwiches, her stomach growling at the sight of them, and walked through the house and to the outdoor table as Hope had instructed. She sat down and admired the garden, which was a ramble of roses and other flowers all growing together. It was like organised chaos, and as different as it was to the landscape she was used to back home, Valentina liked it. She often dreamed of the property she’d left behind, of the hours she’d once spent riding across the seemingly endless fields with Felipe, or lying under the branches of low-hanging trees, even just staring from her bedroom window at the only view she’d ever known. The longer she spent away, the more she yearned for everything she’d lost, aching to go back to the country she loved.

Hope appeared within minutes, carrying two cups of tea and a little jug of milk on a tray, pulling Valentina from her thoughts. ‘I was surprised when I received correspondence from your lawyer,’ Hope said. ‘It’s not often I have someone advocating for one of the young women who come to me, but he was very clear about seeking assurances before you came here. I was most impressed by how thorough he was, and how much he obviously cares about you.’

Valentina took one of the dainty sandwiches Hope offered to her.

‘He’s the only person who knows the truth about my situation, and I’m grateful that he was so understanding. I never saw myself in this position, and I would have been lost without him,’ she said. ‘Although I’m sure that’s a common theme among the young women who come through your door.’

Hope’s smile was kind, and she ate one of the sandwiches before speaking again. ‘I helped a young mother give birth today, and she believed right up until she held that new baby in her arms that her lover would come for her. Sadly, most of the women in my care have been let down by a man—just not all of them can see it until they’re faced with the reality of being alone and pregnant.’

Valentina swallowed her mouthful, noticing that Hope glanced at the wedding ring on her finger. Her throat felt suddenly dry. ‘Is my being married a problem?’

‘Not at all,’ Hope said, sitting back and nursing her tea in her hands. It was clear she was tired, her eyes bracketed by lines that spoke of fatigue rather than age, but there was such a warmth about her that she kept putting Valentina at ease. ‘I have little interest in the man who put you in this situation, and more interest in what I can do to help you and your baby. You’ll receive no judgement from me about what you choose to do, or about why you chose to come here in the first place.’

They sat in a comfortable silence for some time as they both ate the sandwiches and sipped their tea, the afternoon sunshine bathing them in warmth. It gave time for Valentina to study Hope, and made her even more curious about how a young woman not significantly older than her had come to run such an establishment.

‘Hope, if I asked you to care for my baby when I leave, to hold off from finding her adoptive parents, is that something you would be able to do?’ Valentina asked. ‘I intend on making a handsome donation to you once I return to Argentina, and?—’

‘What you’re asking is not something I can do,’ Hope said, gently, as if she were trying very hard not to hurt Valentina’s feelings. ‘If it were a matter of days or weeks, perhaps, but I care for women until they give birth, and for as long as it takes them to recover, and then I place each baby as soon as possible with their adoptive parents. I did respond to your lawyer telling him that I’m simply not set up to care for a child long term.’

Valentina took a moment to steady herself before speaking again, looking out into the garden. ‘Do you have other mothers who don’t want to give up their child? Is it something you’ve been asked before?’

‘Many of the women who come here would rather stay with their child. But in the end, most don’t have a choice. They do what they have to do, for both of their sakes, and to be honest it’s why I started this place.’ She paused. ‘I haven’t helped many mothers yet, it’s only early days, but I want to be able to help as many women as I possibly can.’

‘It’s just, well, I can’t take this baby back home with me immediately, but?—’

‘Valentina, may I give you some advice?’

Valentina nodded.

‘Whatever your reason for being here, everything you do from this moment on is your choice,’ Hope told her. ‘I’ll do everything I can to support you, and I will never part you from your baby if you don’t want that, but you need to make the best decision for your child. We can talk through your options and figure out what’s best for you, and don’t forget that you still have time.’

Valentina swallowed. ‘But what if I don’t have a choice?’ She’d been so careful with her money, making it stretch as far as possible, but she knew that the only way she could secure her future in Argentina would be to leave her child behind.

‘We always have a choice, even when we feel that we don’t.’ Hope rose and disappeared for a moment, before coming back with a small wooden box. She passed it to Valentina, and Valentina ran her fingers over the smooth wood before opening it and looking inside. It was empty.

‘What is this?’ she asked, confused at what she’d been given.

‘I had a handful of these made, for those mothers who want to leave something behind. Sometimes it makes the decision easier, knowing that you can prepare a memento or two for your child.’

Valentina stared down at the box. ‘So I would put something precious inside, for my child to be given one day? If I chose to leave him or her behind?’

Hope reached for her hand and held it. ‘That’s right. It’s your chance to leave something for your child, so they might have a connection to you or a clue, if they ever try to find you one day.’

She put her hand in her pocket and found the familiar shape of the tiny horse, the figurine that she’d kept against her body since the day Felipe had given it to her. It seemed almost meant to be that it was small enough to fit in the little box, as much as it would break her heart to part with it. Although she supposed she was going to break her heart the day she left her baby, anyway.

Besides, Valentina had already made her mind up—she was returning to Argentina to follow the plan she’d agreed upon with her lawyer—which meant that she would have to leave her baby in Hope’s care. Without her inheritance, she would be faced with returning to her husband or being penniless in a foreign country, and she knew that her best chance of securing a future for her child one day was to return home. If Hope couldn’t care for the baby in her absence, then she’d just have to cross her fingers and pray that when she returned to London, she’d be able to find a way to get her baby back.

Even if it meant leaving that child behind with only a tiny box of mementos, and the promise that one day, somehow, she would return.

‘How long could you wait, Hope?’ Valentina asked, needing to know the answer to her earlier question. ‘If I asked you to wait before finding adoptive parents for my baby, is there any length of time you could give me? That we could agree upon?’

Hope seemed to study her, and Valentina watched as she took a big breath, as the answer was hard for her to give. ‘In this hypothetical situation, you would be leaving the baby in my sole charge? It wouldn’t be both of you staying?’

Valentina nodded.

‘It would depend on how many other women were in my care, and what other responsibilities I had at the time,’ Hope said. ‘I have no family members or staff to assist me, so looking after a baby isn’t something I could do for long. If I did, I wouldn’t be able to help other women in need.’

‘A few days then?’ Valentina asked, as her hope began to fade. ‘A week or two? I just need to know.’

‘If you were confident that you could return within a week or two, then I would do my best,’ Hope said. ‘I’ve never had anyone ask me before, that’s all, but I suppose there would always be someone staying here who could help. I can tell that it matters a great deal to you.’

‘I would pay you handsomely on my return,’ she said.

‘Valentina, I don’t do this for the money, but I appreciate the gesture. A donation towards costs is always welcome but not necessary, so I don’t want you to ever think you’re in my debt.’

Treat other people as you expect to be treated yourself. Show great generosity to those who are kind to you.

With her father’s words echoing in her mind, Valentina reached out and touched Hope’s hand.

‘I won’t think I’m in your debt, Hope, but if you assist me through childbirth and help me to keep my baby, I’ll want to spend the rest of my life finding ways to repay you all the same. I’ve lost everything this past year, but I’m determined to change that, for the future of myself and my baby, and especially for those who go out of their way to help me.’

Hope’s eyes met hers, and Valentina found herself wondering what she’d seen in her life, what had compelled her to open a house to help young pregnant women. Whatever her reason, Valentina was thankful she had, because she had no idea what she would have done if Hope hadn’t opened her doors to her.

It had been either here or a convent in the countryside, and she doubted she would have lasted at the latter for more than a few days at best.

‘Thank you, Hope, for welcoming me into your home,’ Valentina said, at the same time as Hope nudged the plate of sandwiches towards her. ‘I was forced from my own home, in Argentina, by my family, and yet you, a stranger, you’ve opened your home and your arms to me.’

Hope’s eyes met hers. ‘It’s their loss, Valentina. One day they’ll realise how foolish they were to treat you so poorly, and if they don’t? Then they don’t deserve to have you in their lives.’

Valentina couldn’t have said it better herself, and she had to presume that Hope was speaking from experience to say it with such conviction.