Page 48 of The Sins That Bleed

Family Reunion

RAI

I yawn and stretch. Sleep is something I once knew, now by the time I fall into bed I need to get right back out of it.

Things have been crazy since we took Alaric’s remaining human men in and started dismantling his empire—the one built on the bones and lives of people he stole.

We’re still getting the numbers of how many people were trafficked under his umbrella but, so far, it’s staggering.

All those lives changed and lost, and the lasting damage for those who survived.

A knock on my office door pulls me out of my thoughts. Nico comes in with more folders for me to sign. My hand threatens to cramp at the thought of it. I’ve signed so many this week that if I never have to use my signature again, it’ll be too soon.

Things are strained between us; even though he explained everything to me, I can’t help how much it hurts. I hate myself for understanding why he did it, and that I can’t do the same for Valeska.

I’m a fucking hypocrite, a complete mess. So naturally, I ignore it.

“Sorry, princess, but I promise these are the last ones for today.”

He drops them on my desk at the same time as he sinks into the chair opposite me.

I drag the stack toward me and get started, wanting to get it over with as soon as possible.

I can sense Nico watching me the whole time, his face telling me what he is waiting to talk to me about—I don’t need to be psychic to predict that.

So I slow down on purpose, making sure I properly scan the documents in front of me even though Nico was the one who drafted them, so a quick scan would be good enough. I fight the tiredness as I read. I need to sleep, and not a normal eight hours either because I’m tired down to my bones.

“Quit stalling, you know damn well those reports are good, and we need to talk about her. I spoke with your sister and she’s not?—”

“Stop, Nico, I don’t want to talk about her.

Not here. Let me get these signed and then we can go home and order a pizza.

I can’t promise I’ll talk about her even then, because it hurts so fucking much.

She betrayed me; she knew my sister was alive all along and still chose to use me like a puppet on a string. ” I sigh.

“I betrayed you too, yet here I am,” he snipes.

I glare at him.

This is why I don’t want to talk about her right now, or about what he did.

I hate her for what she has done to me, but I miss her with every fibre of my being.

It makes me hate myself more, but I can’t bring myself to regret falling in love with her.

Like a puppet on a string she’s tied too tight and it’s inevitable that she’ll drag me back to her.

He holds his hands up in a ‘don’t shoot’ gesture and I feel like a dick.

He’s only trying to help me since I’ve been miserable without her.

Work keeps me busy, and I’ve been working all hours to shut out the thoughts of her, but they still slip past my defences.

Especially when Nico gives me updates that I don’t ask for, but secretly hope he doesn’t stop telling me.

I had to practically handcuff myself to my desk when he’d told me she’d woken up and was okay. I’d stayed with her after that night but once the shock and adrenaline wore off, the dark inky hands of betrayal slithered around me until I couldn’t breathe and I had to get out of there.

“Sorry, I know I’m being a dick, so the pizza is on me tonight.” I smile at him. It doesn’t reach my eyes but it’s the best I can do for now.

“It’s okay, princess, I know things are weird right now and there’s a lot to work through, but I’m here for you, always.

If you’ll let me. You probably don’t want to hear this or think you don’t, but Azara said Valeska has been disappearing for days at a time.

She’s left the running of her business to her and doesn’t want anything to do with it.

I’m worried about her. You and your sister need to talk, and then we need to figure out the rest. Don’t respond to that, just finish signing the reports. ”

I force my hand to move over the paper and sign it, my brain processing everything Nico told me.

She’s not my problem anymore so I shouldn’t care.

I rejected the bond that night, I felt myself splinter and fracture into a million pieces, and that should make me happy, I should relish the empty pit of despair that welcomes me with open arms.

If only my heart felt the same way.

I unlock our apartment door. Nico and I have been sharing it since I decided I couldn’t stay at Valeska’s anymore. He would have stayed there, he and Azara have been closer since this whole incident went down, but he showed solidarity by coming with me even though I told him he didn’t need to.

I hate that so much has come between them, but he needs to seriously think about this—she’s a vampire and he’s not. She will live for who knows how long, and he will age, meaning heartbreak is inevitable for both of them.

She also needs to forgive him for what he did.

I flick the light on and stop short at the sight before me.

The largest bouquet of red roses sits on the worktop and next to it stands my sister.

I’m still not used to her being here in the flesh, and the anger I feel at Valeska for turning her and keeping my sister to herself flares each time I see Azara.

“Before you say anything, nobody knew I was coming here tonight. I’ve got some things I’d like to say to you, Rai, and then you can tell me what you want to do.” She’s nervous, speaking quickly in case I decide to cut her off.

It crosses my mind, but I don’t act on it.

Finding my sister didn’t go at all how I thought it would. I expected us to hug and cry and everything would miraculously be like we never were separated. Instead, it’s been awkward and hard, there’s an ocean between us and I have no idea how to get to her.

I hear Nico shut the door behind him; without turning I know he’s blocking it so I have to face my sister. I sigh and decide to get this over with. It’s going to be painful anyway so we might as well go through with it.

I cross my arms and lean against the counter behind me and wait for her to continue.

She looks to Nico for support and I see him nod in my periphery.

I should’ve known he will always support her even if he didn’t know she was coming tonight.

I’m glad he’s looking out for her when I’m struggling to even talk to her.

“I’m not going to stand here and say that Valeska didn’t keep a massive secret from you, because she did, but it’s not the full story and I can’t stand the thought of you hating her when there is more to it than that.”

I stay silent as she talks, convinced there’s nothing she can say that will undo this for me.

“I knew.”

That gets my attention, and I tear myself away from the counter as I take a step toward her. I slam into Nico and he shoves me back to the counter.

“Stay where you are, Rai, and let her talk. You won’t get in her face, otherwise I’ll have to step in and I don’t want to have to do that.” Nico sounds pained but I respect him and stand back, grateful that he’s so willing to protect her.

Even though she can protect herself, but she shouldn’t have to be protected from me.

Her brother.

Once he’s satisfied that I’m not going anywhere, he stands beside me, ready to honour his promise if I don’t stay here and listen to what she has to say. My heart pounds in my chest. She knew and she still didn’t want to get to know me.

It fucking hurts .

I watch her wring her hands together. “I found out a couple of months ago, after that night we found her in the bathroom. I’d—I’d been blindsided and I wanted to hate her but after some time to process it, I understood why she’d hidden it from me.

How could she tell me my brother was living under the same roof when she’d turned me?

She wasn’t sure what would be worse, you thinking I was missing and potentially dead, or actually dead but a vampire. ”

She shrugs, but there’s so much tension in the movement that it betrays how hard this is for her.

I say nothing as she speaks, that night a vivid memory etched into my brain, and now it makes sense. All the guilt she carried and the lie that was right in front of us the whole time.

“After I found out, I made her promise that she wouldn’t say anything to you.

I wanted to be the one to tell you if I thought that would be best, but then she got that stupid letter.

I didn’t get the chance to tell you myself, I needed time to process what I’d discovered before facing you, but days turned into weeks and then it was too late.

” Tears track down her face, but I’m frozen to the spot.

She’d wanted to tell me.

It doesn’t stop it from hurting, but with every word from Azara, I understand the difficult position Valeska had been in. One that drove her so close to a death that is hard to come by, and it hits me how bad she’s been hurting. Now I’m the one punishing her further.

Nico moves to my sister and wipes the tears from her cheeks. She lets him, and he whispers something to her as my mind whirls with this new information. I need to get to ma reine, ask her to forgive me for being so cruel and thinking that she would do this for her own amusement or benefit.

I’m no better than anyone else that’s treated her like shit.

“Don’t take this all out on V, she—” she sobs but I cut her off

“It’s okay, Az.” The childhood nickname I used to call her slips out and her eyes widen in shock.

“It all makes sense now, and I understand how hard it must have been for you both to decide whether to tell me. One day, when you’re ready, we’re going to talk about what happened and how it led you down this path, but I need to earn that. ”

This time it’s me that has tears running down my face. I’ve been a shit brother—all I wanted was to have her back in my life, and I’ve spent this whole week trying to forget about her and Valeska.

Nico turns to me and wipes my tears but it’s pointless, the tears fall faster and all three of us are crying now anyway.

“I’m so sorry, Az, I couldn’t protect you back then, and now that I finally got you back I’ve been a shit brother to you. I’ve missed you so fucking much and I never stopped searching; I’ve spent my entire life looking for you so I could bring you home.”

She comes closer to me and throws her arms around me, so I do the same. We stand there in a kitchen that doesn’t feel like home, holding each other tight as we cry. Cry for all the things we missed, all the memories we couldn’t make, and all the heartbreak we endured.

After a while we’re both enveloped in Nico’s arms, barely able to register his words as he declares, “Group hug!”

We stay like that until Nico’s belly rumbles loudly, making us all laugh. I’m so grateful to have them in my life, but we’re one short, the final puzzle piece to my family is somewhere all alone. A tortured soul that deserves to be loved and cherished, flaws and all.

We all carry secrets, committing sins that bleed us dry and robs us of life.

“You know, we need to tell Mum and Dad at some point. They’ve never stopped searching for you either, and they even set up a charity in your name for other families who need support and resources.” I’m heading toward the door as I speak, because I have no intention of staying here anymore.

My home is with Valeska.

“I thought you’d say that, but I’m scared. What if they’d have preferred for me to die? It’s not going to be easy for them to know I never can.” She speaks fast, panic bleeding into her tone.

“Hey, it’s okay.” I turn to her. “You don’t need to decide yet, and whatever you do end up doing, I will be here with you every step of the way. But for the record, they’d never wish you were dead.”

She looks at me and gives me a watery smile. “Thank you, Rai-Rai.” Her nickname for me heals a part of me in.

“I don’t know about you two, but I don’t actually want to be here anymore, I need to get ma reine back. Nico, we’ll pick pizza up on the way, if you’re coming.” I don’t wait for an answer as I swing the door open.

I’m already pressing the button for the elevator when they catch up to me.

“I thought you’d never ask, princess.” Nico winks at me and I laugh for the first time in over a week.

Tonight, I’m getting the woman I love back, even if I have to beg for her on my knees.