Page 18 of The Sins That Bleed

The Lovers

VALESKA

I stay pressed to the wall, blending in with the shadows as I watch him sleep.

Rai lays on his front, hands tucked underneath the pillow his head rests on. His back is on full display from where the sheets have slipped down, and I admire the hard lines of his exposed muscles. He’s magnificent in the low light of the room, my vision heightened by the beast I’ve become.

I shouldn’t be here, but I couldn’t stay away from him.

I want to trail my fingers over his skin as the burning warmth of life that thrums beneath his flesh attempts to warm up my frozen hands. Drawn to him like a moth to a flame, I stalk closer without making a sound until I’m standing beside him.

I extend a finger and gently ghost it across every line, curve, and dip I can see. His skin is soft under my fingertip—it makes me wonder how it would feel to be pressed up against him. To be caged inside his large frame and be held.

Would he be able to thaw the frozen wasteland of my soul?

It’s been a long time since I’d been wrapped up in the arms of a lover, since I’ve had a true connection with someone.

I think back to the times when my now-dead husband would hold me and quickly erase the thought.

I was a possession to him, something to be owned and controlled.

My body was an object to be used when he commanded it and nothing more.

My idea of love was killed the day Kian asked me to be his wife.

It could be why I long to be a hopeless romantic, no matter how futile it is. To be considered worthy of a love so true that the very essence of my other half will bring me comfort and love, their aura wrapping me in a blanket made from their soul.

I sigh, knowing that kind of relationship isn’t in the cards for me, it’s not in my fate. I am cursed to walk this existence alone, my cold and bitter heart nothing but a hardened lump in my chest.

I move to the other side of the bed and crawl on, laying down next to him so I can see his enthralling face as he rests. He doesn’t stir, and I enjoy the quiet moment to take him in. The lines of his face smooth as he sleeps, none of the thoughts that plague his waking hours anywhere to be found.

“Sleep well, mon chéri.”

The words are so quiet, he wouldn’t have heard them if he was awake.

We stay like that for a while and it’s peaceful, his masculine aroma swirling around us as I breathe him in, relishing the notes of rosewood and cinnamon.

His bodywash mixed with his natural scent and the sweetness of his life source.

Bloodlust is threatening to pull me under, but I made sure to overindulge before I came to him tonight, not wanting to take the risk of falling into a frenzy and draining him of his blood. I suppress the feelings and trace a finger down the bridge of his nose.

I freeze, locking my entire body into place as the sensation of my touch has him stirring. I wait to see if I’ve woken him up or if he’ll fall back to sleep. He surprises me by shifting over, forcing me to roll onto my back.

I don’t fight it, allowing my body to flow with his movement as his head settles in the crook of my neck. His large palm is tucked under my back as he clutches me to him, a leg tossed over mine.

“Mon cauchemar, I missed you,” Rai breathes into my neck.

He must be dreaming about me. Otherwise, he’d have plunged the knife I now know he keeps under his pillow straight into my heart.

“Mon chéri, I missed you too,” I whisper.

The words don’t feel like a lie on my tongue. I have no idea why I climbed into bed with him, letting him snuggle into me and whispering those words back. None of this makes any sense and I won’t fool myself into believing the words he murmurs in the dead of night.

He’s confused is all, the same way that I’m trying to understand what is happening to me and why he has me ready to carve out the eyes of any person who may try to harm him, emotionally or physically.

He’s a man for fucks sake; I shouldn’t want to protect him.

But even though he has me acting this way, we can never be. If he knew what I was hiding, he’d tear out my dead heart with his bare hands and set me on fire. I know because I want to do it to myself for what I’ve done and who I’ve become.

I hum softly to him, holding him close and running my hands over his back and through his hair.

Indulging in this moment where I’m not a vampire queen and he isn’t a human who hates me.

Maybe in another life, another universe, my wretched soul will be worthy of a man who is willing to sacrifice living his life to save others.

We stay like that until the sun starts to rise and brighten his room, prompting me to slip out from under him and leave through the window like I always do. But not before I press a light kiss to his lips, committing another sin that only I will carry the burden of knowing.

I don’t stop thinking about how right it felt to put my lips on his the whole way home.

“Is everything set for tonight?” I ask Sunny as we sit in our office.

“Yeah, you shouldn’t have any problem getting into the facility.

Security gets light after midnight when the skeleton crew goes in.

From what I’ve gathered, they mostly stay in the security room monitoring the cameras.

One of them will get up every hour to do a quick sweep, but it’s always on the hour. ”

“Easy then. I’ll be in and out with no issue and the case will progress.”

I kick my feet up onto my desk, relaxing now I know it will be an in-and-out job.

Everything has been quiet since the incident at the strip club, so we’ve had more time to focus on the case to help Rai and Nico, since they couldn’t get the suspects to talk.

After tonight, they’ll have even more to go on, and then they’ll be forced to work with me.

I sensed Rai’s apprehension when I’d offered the deal—he doesn’t trust me and thinks I’ll screw him over or back him into a corner. If this wasn’t so important to me, I might have done it for fun, but it is important, so I’ll give him whatever he needs.

I smirk to myself. I’m just not telling him that.

“Don’t do that, V. You know I hate it when you do that.”

I shoot her an innocent look that causes her to stand abruptly, her red-and-pink lob swishing with the movement.

She plants her hands on her hips. I’m in trouble.

I sit up and meet her eyes; there’s no point trying to argue with her when she is right, and instead brace myself for the incoming lecture.

She pops a bubble of gum before ripping into me.

“Every time you say it’ll be easy or a quick job, something goes wrong. You were only meant to drop the files in Rai’s office and yet you were seen by him. You were only supposed to free me for somebody to find my body, and yet you risked exposing yourself to save me. This is serious!” she fumes.

Another bubble blown and popped. She’s really mad.

“I know, Sunny. I am taking this seriously. I promise you and I’ll take every precaution to not get caught.

I don’t want you to worry about me. You were the only risk ever worth taking and I don’t regret it with a single fibre of my being.

So, let’s go over the blueprints one more time to be sure I get in and out. ”

She nods in agreement, satisfied with my answer, and relief courses through me as she spreads the blueprints out on her desk.

I stand and make my way over to her and study it again, noting all the exits and cameras I’ll have to avoid by using the vents.

It’s risky, but it’s the easiest way in without raising the alarm.

Most people try and break out of a prison, not in, but I imagine it’s pretty frowned upon.

We repeat the course I have to take out loud after she rolls it up: left, straight, right, straight some more, and continue until I can repeat it back to her with no mistakes. Aside from crawling around in the vents like a rodent, I am comfortable with the plan.

“Do you fancy a bit of retail therapy, Sunny? I think we deserve a break after all our hard work.” I grin at her, sensing her answer already.

“Absolutely, I’ve worked myself to the bone today.”

Our cackles bounce off the walls in unison. We’ve only been working for a few hours but both of us love to shop so we always find any excuse to go.

“I think a new outfit will make it better, where to?” I wait for her answer as I fire a text off to my driver to get the car ready, and one to Zyon to let him know we’re heading out.

“Fifth Avenue; I’ve seen some new boots with my name on it.”

“The car’s ready and Zyon knows. Let’s do some real damage to the coffers today.” I hold out my arm and she takes it, linking us together as we skip down the hall toward the elevator.

Spending a dead man’s money feels like we’re doing our part for the feminist agenda.

“Which car are we taking today, V?”

“The Maybach, darling.”

We don’t stop laughing the whole ride down to the garage. It’s so fun being ridiculously rich and having someone to share it with. We meet Zyon in the underground garage and he escorts me to the waiting car, my driver already holding the door open for us.

“Thanks, Zyon. Is there anything you would like us to pick up for you whilst we’re out?” I throw the offer out casually; I wouldn’t offer to do it for anyone except him and Sunny.

“No thank you, ma’am. I hope you and Miss Sunny have a delightful time.” His warm smile tugs up one of my own.

“I’m sure we will, be in touch if anything happens.”

His stiff nod is the only response I get as I slip into the black Maybach that’s been polished within an inch of its life. My driver closes the door, and I sink into the red leather seats that are softly lit by the hundreds of stars decorating the interior roof.

We’re soon moving through the city, the pace languid as we hit the city traffic, until we pull up to our favourite designer department store. We’re guided around the back and into an underground car park where I have a spot reserved.

We step out and thank the driver. I dismiss him so he can take a couple hours off whilst we distract ourselves from what we need to do tonight.

Once in the elevator, we head straight up to the shoe department so Sunny can get the ones she’s been eyeballing for a while.

I end up picking up a few new stilettos and boots for myself.

We continue like that throughout the day, going through each floor and shopping to our heart’s content.

The staff helps to pull everything for us and store it for delivery later today.

We get matching white-gold chain bracelets, custom-made in front of us in an infinite loop that cannot be removed.

Our first initials dangling from it, the tiny V and S next to each other, mimicking how we are always together in life.

I make a pitstop in the floral department while Sunny is busy trying something on, picking out roses saturated with the deepest of reds.

The bouquet is made up of thirteen roses, wrapped in black paper and tied with a silk ribbon that matches the colour of the petals.

I give them the address I have memorised by heart and pay for them there and then.

I scribble down a note to be included with the delivery.

I’m back outside the private changing suite as Sunny comes out to show me another piece of clothing that caught her attention, unaware that I’d even left.