Page 1

ONE

emmanuel

AGED SIXTEEN

Eleven Years Ago

"You're a motherfucker, Jacob Dellinger," Ma hisses. "Christ, you're a useless motherfucker," she snaps, her eyes filled with tears as she glares at the drunken fool who stumbled into the house only minutes ago.

He's drunk as a fucking skunk—something that's normal for him these days.

I honestly can't remember the last time I saw my da sober.

It must have been over six years ago because it's been at least that long since he was last able to hold a job down.

Ma's basically a single mam at this stage.

I have no idea why she allows the asshole back into the house, but he's her husband—is what she says to me in his defence.

The man stopped being my da the day I watched him put his fist into her face.

The sound of her cheekbone crunching is something I will never forget nor forgive.

Thankfully I managed to get to him before he could try and do it again.

I may be young, but I'm not small nor am I weak—unlike the man who has the title of being my father.

All it took was me getting in his face once for him to back off and apologize, sobbing like the little bitch he is.

"Who the fuck are you talking to?" Da snarls as he starts to make his way toward Ma.

I step into his path, my fists balled up by my sides.

"Don't fucking try it," I hiss in his face, allowing him to see my anger and disdain for him.

He's known for a few years now that I hate his guts.

It's a fucked up thing for your sixteen-year-old son to hate you, but that's what happens when you're a bastard who doesn't understand what family is.

I hate that he has the title of my father, but thankfully, I'm nothing like him.

The only thing I did get from him was my eyes.

They're identical to his. Other than that, I'm pure Ma.

"Move out of my way, you little shit," he growls as he tries to go around me, but I continue to stand in his way. "Emmanuel, fucking move. That bitch can't talk to me like that. Ain't no fucking way she's talking to me like that."

I laugh. I can't help it. He's really trying to play like he's all that.

"Why?" I ask. "It's not like what she's said is wrong, is it?

You are a useless motherfucker. I mean, look at the state of ya.

You're drunk and stumbling about the place.

" I glance down at his pants. "And I'm hoping you spilled a pint over yourself, but let's be real, you'd never spill alcohol, which means you've pissed yourself.

So tell me, what is it that Ma said that was wrong? "

His face turns a putrid shade of red as he glares at me. "You no good for nothing cunt," he spits, his eyes wild as he tries to stumble toward me. "I'm your father."

I laugh once again. "Yeah? When did that happen?

You've never been someone I can rely on, nor are you a role model.

Hell, the only thing you've shown me is what not to be.

You're a fucking asshole, Jacob, a disgrace, and I wish like hell you'd just fucking leave and never come back.

You make Ma miserable. You'd do everyone a favor by leaving and never coming back. "

He turns to Ma, his red face blotchy as he clenches his fist. "Is this what you want?" he asks her.

I watch as she swallows hard, tears streaming down her face.

"Yes," she says, her voice a little shaky.

She coughs, and I smile as she stands up tall, straightening her shoulders, and stares my dad square in the eye.

"I loved you once," she tells him, her voice a lot stronger now.

"I had so many dreams of us being together, Jacob, but each and every time I gave you another chance, you'd just let me down.

I have no more dreams. You've shattered every single one of them.

I'm done. I can't keep doing this. I want a divorce. "

Fuck, that wasn't what I was expecting, but it sure is the best thing for her.

She deserves to have her life back, rather than being tied to him.

He doesn't care about anyone but himself.

Ma's still in her early thirties. She has time to start again.

She deserves a hell of a lot better than Da.

He never gave her back an ounce of what she gave him.

"Fine," he stammers. "Fuck you, Emmanuel. You've done this. You'll live your life knowing you broke our marriage. I hope you're able to live with yourself."

"He didn't break our marriage," Ma counters.

"You broke it a long time ago, Jacob. You really did.

I was foolish enough to think having a baby would solve all our problems. Having Emmanuel was the best decision of my life and I'm so happy I have him, but it showed me just how little you cared about me. You destroyed us, not our son."

Jacob turns his back on me, not saying another word. I watch as he stumbles out of the house and I hear Ma exhale deeply. "Ma?—"

She shakes her head. "That was a long time coming, hun.

Trust me, I've been putting it off for the longest time.

I can't keep doing it anymore. I'm done.

I just needed the push. Thank you." Her tears stream down her face, and I know she's trying her hardest not to break down right now.

Ma will do whatever it takes not to show me how much she's hurting.

She's always done it. Even when Da punched her, she was more worried about me than herself.

I shake my head. "Go," I tell her, pressing a kiss to her cheek.

"Go to Patty. You'll need her." Patty is her best friend.

She's also the aunt of my best friend, Maverick.

Our families are extremely close. It makes me wonder why my da was that stupid.

Patty's brother—Jerry—is the head of the Houlihan Gang, one of Ireland's leading organized crime groups.

If he finds out what my da's done, I wouldn't be surprised if he has some of his men—or himself—send Da a message.

"Are you sure?" she asks.

I nod. "Go, get drunk," I tell her with a smile. I know that the moment she tells Patty she's asked my dad for a divorce, Patty will open the tequila to celebrate. Patty hates Da just as much as Ma hates Patty's husband, Thomas.

"Call me if you need me," she tells me as she wipes the tears from her eyes. "I know you're almost a man now, Emmanuel, but I'm still your ma and I care about you."

"I will," I assure her. "I'm going over to Mav's to hang out."

She reaches for her bag. "Do you think he'll stay gone?

" she asks, her voice trembling. She's scared of what he'll do next, and while I want to believe he'll just walk away without a fuss, I know he won't. He's not that type of man.

He hates losing and he's lost Ma, who pays for everything for him.

He'll be back. But I have a plan formulating that will stop that, one that'll make sure he won’t return.

I just need a little help getting it sorted.

"We're going to be fine. We'll get security up on the house. If we need to, we'll get the gardai involved." With what I have planned, that's not going to happen.

She gives me a soft smile, and I know I’ve somewhat reassured her that it'll be okay.

The moment she leaves the house, I race upstairs and grab my jacket, phone, keys, and the bag that contains the gun I purchased two weeks ago. It's time to ensure I'm ready if he returns. There's no way in hell that he'll get the chance to hurt Ma again.

* * *

"Talk to me, son. What's going on?" Jer asks, his brows knitted as he glances from me to the gun in my hand. "What's brought this on?"

"Will you help me?" I ask him. I don't want to explain how much of a dick my dad is, but knowing Jerry, he's not going to let this go unless I tell him. Still, I'm hoping he'll just leave it be.

"Emmanuel, if your ma or da found out that I taught you how to shoot a gun, let alone that I knew you had one, they'd want my guts for garters, and rightly so. You're sixteen, for fuck's sake."

"Da wouldn't give a shit. He never has. Besides, it's him I need it for."

Jer's brows furrow. "Explain, please."

I sigh. "If I tell you, you have to promise it won't get back to Ma. She's been hell bent on no one finding out. Also, you'll promise to help me."

His lips twist into a half smile, half snarl.

"Sure, why the fuck not. But, son, you have to realize that if I do this, this means you work for me, and there are rules to be followed when you do.

" He crosses his arms over his chest. "This isn't something you take lightly.

Joining the Houlihan Gang isn't for fun; it's a lifetime commitment.

The gang comes before all else. When I tell you to do something, I expect it to be done. No questions asked."

I nod. I knew asking him for help would come with that condition.

I'm not naive—hell, nowhere fucking near.

Jer's never going to give someone something for free.

Everything in life has a cost, and me learning how to use a gun to ensure my father doesn't come near Ma again is well worth the price of working for him.

I explain at length what's been going on and how bad things have gotten with my da; how today was a relatively normal day but his abusive behavior—the constant degrading of Ma, along with breaking her shit whenever he's drunk—is getting worse.

But when I tell him about Da hurting her, Jer looks murderous.

"Right," he says thickly. "I'll have my boys sort out security on the house while your ma’s at Patty's.

We'll make sure she stays there until we have the place secured.

I'm decent with a gun, so I'll show you the basics.

But I know a guy who's better. I'll contact him and get you set up with him once you have the basic knowledge down. That sound good to you?"

I nod. "I appreciate it, Jer," I say gratefully. I know he could have turned his back and done whatever the hell he wanted, but he's taking the time to help me and Ma out, which I'm extremely grateful for.

He shakes his head. "No thanks needed. You’re family and this is what family does. Now, what happens when Maverick finds out?"

I sigh. Mav and I have always told each other everything. We're as close as brothers. But this is something he has no idea about. "I'd prefer if it was only you who knew about this and about me working for you. For now, at least."

His smile is wide, like a man who’s pleased he got his way. "My thinking exactly. The last thing we need is for Maverick or even his ma finding out. Christ, if anyone could give me a damn headache it's Nichola."

I laugh. Nichola is Jer's sister and Patty's twin.

She's Mav's ma, and she and her husband have welcomed me into their family with open arms, but she's bossy as hell and hates to be out of the loop about anything.

It's better if she doesn't know anything.

It would save everyone having to listen to multiple lectures.

"Now, let me call my boys and we'll get you started with the gun."

I take a deep breath as he exits the room, his phone to his ear as he calls his men to organize cameras and alarms around the house.

I know that today is the day my life changes, but it's needed. My ma needs to be protected. My da is a drunken bastard with no money and nowhere to turn to. He'll blame us for that, and then there's no knowing what he'll do next. But whatever it is, I'll be ready and waiting for it.