Page 5

SHANE

I felt like I was losing my mind.

The way Calder had looked at me after our fingers touched…

But I knew that I was just projecting again. So, why couldn’t I stop doing it? And why couldn’t I stop thinking about him?

I shook my head as I stared down at the Canyon Creek Diner menu. I’d come out here to avoid Calder for a few hours at least, giving him some excuse about needing to do some work in town. I just needed some space today, some time to get any thoughts of him out of my system?—

“Virgil told me about that cowboy of yours.”

Jolene was suddenly standing next to my booth, a pot of coffee in her grip. “Said something about memory trouble?”

“Right. Calder.” I groaned. How was talking about him going to help me stop thinking about him?

“Virgil told me he keeps staring at you.”

“What? Why is Virgil staring at me?”

Jolene huffed. “Not Virgil! Your cowboy. Calder.”

“He’s not my cowboy—wait. He’s been staring at me?”

“Un-huh.” She grinned. “Staring at you like someone who’s trying to figure out why the rules don’t make sense anymore.”

“Rules?”

“Shane. You’re the smart one. Don’t make me spell this out for you.” Jolene poured me a cup of coffee, her attention still on me. “And don’t be stupid. This is a sensitive situation, sure. But you know better than to let a good thing pass you by.”

“Jolene, Calder’s not?—”

“Nope. I’m not doing this with you.” Jolene waved off my words. “Do you want your usual? Two eggs, three pieces of bacon, hash on the side?”

“Maybe a stack of pancakes, too.”

“Of course. Anything for you.” Jolene playfully pinched my cheek before she made her way to the kitchen counter.

That was the sort of thing I allowed from people who’d known me my whole life, although, there was really no stopping Jolene’s cheek pinching either way.

By the time she’d returned with my food, I was ecstatic about the chance to chow down, eager to get Calder off my mind, even if it was only until the end of the meal.

And then, he would occupy my mind all over again.

“How’s Calder?”

It was the first question Levi asked me as soon as I stepped into his office. I was still trying to avoid Calder, wanting to kill more time before I ended up around him today. I’d decided to check in on Levi, giving myself something to do in the meantime.

Of course, I hadn’t been expecting him to bring up Calder, first thing.

“He’s fine. Why?” I replied, my tone slightly off.

Levi noticed. He looked up at me as he leaned across his desk. “Shane?”

“Yeah?”

“You do realize that I haven’t seen Calder since you decided to play babysitter.”

“I mean, he’s been on the property the whole time.”

“Right. And you’ve been territorial. The whole time,” Levi replied, with a smirk. “No one else gets to hang out with him, except for you. Not to mention you two are always hanging out together, anyway.”

“I don’t know if I’d call that being territorial. He needs someone to look after him, at least until he’s got his memory back?—”

“I have another theory.”

“Which is?”

“That you like spending so much time with him,” he continued. “That you don’t want anyone else getting in there, cutting into your days together. My theory is that you don’t want anyone else taking him away from you?—”

“Stop.”

“Stop what?”

“You’re wrong.” I let out a deep sigh. “Calder and I aren’t anything, Levi. Not even friends. I’m just his caretaker and I’m doing my job. You know me. I’ve always been a thorough worker when it comes to my assignments.”

“But you assigned yourself to Calder, Shane. Didn’t you?”

“That doesn’t mean anything.”

“Huh.” Levi stood from his desk, coming around the side of it. He took a seat on its wooden edge. “And I thought you were supposed to be the smart one.”

“You’re the second person to say that to me today.”

“Was the first person who said it Jolene or Virgil?” Levi chuckled. “Either way, they’re right. This is… extremely uncharacteristic of you, Shane. And may I dare suggest you seem a little flustered during this discussion?”

“I just came here to check on you, see how things were going. I didn’t ask for all of this.”

“You don’t have to ask me to care about you, Shane.” Levi playfully shrugged. “I’ll do that, free of charge, forever.”

“Okay, well, it seems like things are good here, so I guess I’ll head out?—”

“Shane?”

“Yeah?”

“You’re smart. Don’t be dumb.”

“Is there a script all of you are working from or what?” I rolled my eyes before I walked out of Levi’s office.

It was frustrating hearing the same thing twice in one day, especially when I’d wanted to avoid thinking about Calder today.

I wanted to brush off Jolene’s words and Levi’s, but instead, I felt them digging deep inside, tunneling underneath my skin.

Still, I knew something that they didn’t. I knew that Calder was straight .

It was an important piece of the puzzle that everyone seemed to be conveniently forgetting, except for me.

Honestly, it was all I’d been able to think about, the impossibility of the situation, the way nothing could’ve ever come from it.

It was the exact type of thing I’d been trying to shove all the way down, forcing a door closed between us, regretting that it’d ever opened in the first place.

The sooner I stopped thinking about Calder, the better.

I was on my way back to my cabin when I spotted Calder.

He was tinkering with something mechanical, a box of borrowed tools at his side. He was so focused that I wondered if I’d be able to sneak past him into my cabin, completing my goal of avoiding him for the day. I took a few steps in his direction, staying quiet, my head held low…

But of course, as soon as I got a few steps away from him, he looked up at me with a grin. “Shane! Hey! There you are.”

“Here I am.” I tried to hide my unease. “How, uh, how has today been for you?”

“Same old, same old.” He shrugged. “Except for this thing. I heard it rattling and decided to come check on it. Looks like the generator might be about to go on the fritz.”

“Have you worked on generators before—” The question came out before I could stop myself.

But Calder just smiled. “You know, it’s the strangest thing. I can’t seem to remember…”

“Sorry.”

“No worries.” Calder playfully knocked against the generator. “This might drive me crazy, though. I feel like I’m so close but still so far away.” He looked back up at me. “What were you up to today? Handling business off the ranch?”

“Something like that, yeah.”

“Do you have anything left in the tank? I could use some help down here.”

“Oh… uh…” I hesitated, trying to come up with a good excuse.

“Wait. Do you not know how to fix a generator?” Calder’s mouth fell open. “Sorry, that’s just really surprising. You seem like you’re the whole cowboy package.”

“I know how to fix a generator, Calder.”

“Prove it.”

I inwardly groaned. Even though I needed to keep my distance, my pride wasn’t going to let me pass up an opportunity to show Calder that I knew what the hell I was doing. Conflicted, I took a seat next to him on the ground, reaching for the toolbox. “Here. Let me get a good look at it first…”

Calder shifted closer to me, his body way too close to mine. “What do you think?”

My mind blanked at the question.

He smelled so perfectly earthy, the scent warm and refreshing.

“Shane? What are you thinking?” Calder’s eyes were on mine. His gaze was soft but focused, almost like he was trying to memorize what was right in front of him.

Which was my face.

Is Calder trying to memorize my face? Why?

“I’m thinking that I need to… do… something.

” My words came out vague, as I forced myself to concentrate on the task at hand.

After about thirty minutes of silence, the deed was done, the generator no longer making any strange noises.

I immediately stood from the ground, wanting to put as much distance between us as possible.

“All right. I’ll be seeing you,” I said, already walking to my cabin.

“Tomorrow, right?”

“Tomorrow?”

“Yeah. You’re still letting me shadow you, aren’t you?”

“Sure. Of course.” I nodded, still unsure. “Tomorrow it is, then.”

I continued moving away from him, getting back on the main trail.

Fuck.

Why’d he have to look at me like that?

There was a storm brewing inside me with every step away from Calder, one that was getting harder and harder to ignore. I didn’t want to know what was going to happen when it finally touched down, when the winds picked up, when the sky darkened overhead.

I just quietly hoped that we’d never have to find out.