Chapter Seven
P erian woke to the feeling of being warm and comfortable, and it took a moment for the events of last night to come back to him. He had literally fallen asleep on Brannal and then needed the other man to take him to bed—and not in the fun way. He lay there and pondered if that was completely weird and unacceptable. Without really thinking about it, Perian had imagined they’d be having sex every night, but it wasn’t like they hadn’t had sex yesterday. Perian had really enjoyed the night they shared, and perhaps that was what was actually making him feel a little awkward this morning.
Cozy cuddles were definitely not something he was going to get down at the pub. This had always been more than those fleeting encounters, and that left him both uncertain and wanting to greedily keep it forever.
And he was maybe a little worried that less sex would mean Brannal would tire of him sooner. It was true that Brannal hadn’t suggested yesterday evening end the way it did, but he hadn’t seemed irritated when he’d woken Perian and led him to bed, not that he’d really been been in a fit state to notice. Maybe—
“I can hear you thinking over there.”
Brannal’s voice was a bit lower than normal, scratchy with sleep, and it made Perian smile to himself. Whether or not Brannal had been irritated yesterday, he didn’t sound irritated this morning.
“Is that one of the abilities that is conferred with controlling elements?”
Brannal huffed a breath. “It’s too early for that many thoughts.”
Perian twisted around so they were facing one another.
“Out of curiosity, how early is too early for how many thoughts? Is there a specific number that is acceptable, and at what time precisely are more allowed?”
Brannal made a disgruntled face. “Too early for all of that .”
Perian could only snort with laughter, imagining what everyone would think of this delightful version of yesterday’s formidable man.
“Well, if it’s too early for thinking, what could we possibly do to pass the time?”
“Sleep?” Brannal asked.
But there was a gleam in his eye. Perian pressed closer.
“Oh, I think we can come up with something a little more enjoyable than sleeping.”
“Like what?” Brannal asked with mock innocence.
Perian took this as an invitation to crawl on top of the other man. Perian rocked against the hard body beneath him, enjoying the way Brannal sucked in a sharp breath, his fingers coming to dig into Perian’s hips.
Yes, this was definitely a nice way to begin the morning.
Once they cleaned up and dressed, they had breakfast in the sitting room. Perian wasn’t sure if this was a standing arrangement that dated prior to his injury or if it had been instituted then, but he was very much enjoying all the one-on-one time. It had been good to separate yesterday, though; it showed that Perian had some independence and that he could—mostly—fend for himself. He didn’t want Brannal to think he had to keep him constantly entertained.
As they were finishing breakfast, Brannal said, “I have business I must attend to again today.”
Perian widened his eyes. “Your very important work in your very important position keeps you busy multiple days in a row ?”
Brannal rolled his eyes. Perian grinned at him.
“I can keep myself occupied, I promise.”
Brannal rose to his feet. “Well, let me show you the lending catalog, at least, so we don’t keep you trapped in the library. Only the elements know what you’d get up to.”
“I’ll have you know I’m very well behaved in the library,” Perian told him primly.
Brannal’s lip curled up. “I’d like to see that.”
Perian winked at him. “You wouldn’t, actually. It’s very boring.”
Brannal shook his head, but he looked amused.
The library was once again deserted, and it was but the work of a moment for Brannal to show Perian where the catalog was, open it to the current page and point out the entirely prosaic way that books were signed out: author, title, who borrowed it and on what date, and the date when it was returned.
And then Perian caught sight of the last book that Molun had signed out.
“‘Unnecessarily long and extremely boring book that Brannal made me take out,’” he read. In the spot that was reserved for date of return, he’d scrawled in tiny script, “I’ll be keeping this sucker forever because it’s so boring I’ll never get through it but that shouldn’t matter because I can’t imagine anyone else ever wanting to read it”.
Brannal sighed. “Molun’s is the example not to follow.”
“Uh huh.”
“You said you were well-behaved in the library,” Brannal reminded him.
“I absolutely am,” Perian agreed, moving over to the window embrasure and jumping up to see if his books were still there. “Yes! Nobody found them.”
Brannal sounded long-suffering. “I don’t know why I even bother.”
With his armful of books, Perian turned back to Brannal with his most engaging smile. “I am going to sign out these books just like I’m supposed to.”
Brannal rolled his eyes. “I am daily delighted that you and Molun can’t set things on fire.”
Perian raised an eyebrow. “You know, your amazing ability to ‘poof’ fire into existence with no more than a thought notwithstanding, the rest of humanity is actually able to produce flame as well.”
Brannal made a face. “That came out wrong.”
Perian gave in and grinned as he set the books down by the catalog. “No, I know exactly what you mean. I should definitely not be someone who can manifest fireballs with a thought.”
Shaking his head but still looking amused, Brannal said, “Try not to get into too much trouble today.”
“Hey,” Perian protested, “I was totally not in trouble yesterday!”
“I’m not making any assumptions about your current behavior based on your past behavior. This is a pure wish that you not get into any trouble today.”
Perian laughed, tugged the man closer by his sword belt, and kissed him. It was meant to be entirely chaste but got a bit too involved. Reluctantly, he pulled back before he could find out if there was more they could do in the library.
“Have a wonderful day.”
Brannal looked a little bit dazed as he said, “You too,” and headed on his way, leaving Perian feeling rather proud of himself. Before he could get distracted, he carefully signed out the handful of books. He wouldn’t put it past Brannal to come and check if Perian had done it, solely with the intention of being able to tease him if he’d failed. Once that was done, Perian triumphantly carried the books back to Brannal’s rooms.
The rooms were very nice, but they weren’t nearly as enjoyable when Brannal wasn’t in them. After Perian had carefully tucked the books on a corner of the bookshelf where they would probably be consumed by the rest of Brannal’s books and then never be heard from again—and then Perian would have to go tear the page out of the lending catalog and pretend it had never happened—he stared around the room and tried to figure out what to do. After the mostly successful day yesterday, he thought he probably shouldn’t bother the Mage Warriors in training this early. Then he caught sight of the bed, and that was when he remembered his promise to Renny to bring her a blanket.
That was when Perian realized this was actually a harder promise to deliver on than he’d anticipated. He had no problem carrying a blanket through the entire castle, but he couldn’t very well take the blanket off Brannal’s bed, plan to sit on the ground, and then just bring it back and return it to the bed.
Perian hadn’t brought any of his own blankets because he’d known the inn would provide them. He could send for one of his blankets, but that would certainly not produce a blanket for him to give to Renny today. He could go buy a blanket, but that wouldn’t be quick, either. Of course, he was a guest of the castle. He could probably ask for a blanket… somehow.
Perian weighed his options and then decided to start with trying to find the person he knew was good with clothes and could probably get him a blanket as well. Perian was entirely confident that Nisal had skills. This led him back to the Mage Warrior training after all, where Perian found that they were in seated lessons. He would totally have sneaked away again when he saw they were busy, but Molun spotted him first. So then Perian interrupted the entire class after all, because it would have taken him longer and surely been more annoying to explain that he’d interrupted them but wasn’t going to say why.
“So sorry to bother you. I was really hoping to talk to Nisal, if they’re available.”
It turned out Nisal was working with the doctor, and before Perian could protest that it really wasn’t that important, and he could definitely wait, one of the novices had been dispatched to retrieve them. Molun seemed like the sort who would welcome random interruptions, actually, so it wasn’t all that surprising he was aiding and abetting Perian.
A few minutes later, the novice was slipping back into the lecture, Perian was waving goodbye to the class, and Nisal was looking at him curiously.
“I’m so sorry,” Perian told them. “I was just wondering where you were, and before I knew it, Molun was retrieving you. I didn’t mean to interrupt.”
“It’s no problem,” they told him, looking at him curiously. “How can I help?”
“Well, it sounds totally ridiculous now, especially when weighed against you helping a doctor, but I, uh, need a blanket.”
They just kept staring at him for a long, blank moment, and then their face split into a wide smile.
“You need a blanket ?”
“I told you it sounded ridiculous,” he said, groaning with embarrassment. “But yes, I really do need a blanket. Can you help me find one?”
They still looked indecently amused, but they nodded.
“Of course, I can help you get a blanket. The cost, of course, is the reason why you suddenly need a blanket. Does your room not have enough? Are you worried about next winter? Have you heard that there is about to be a sudden blanket shortage?”
“Shut up,” Perian told them, trying to sound serious.
They mimed locking their lips with a key, but that didn’t last very long.
“There are supply rooms,” Nisal told him. “You can get as many of those sorts of supplies as needed. And you can always ask the castle staff.”
“That just seems rude,” Perian told them. Now that they said it, though, he vaguely remembered Brannal mentioning supply rooms in the public wing. “I mean, I don’t know where the staff normally are, but if I find one in the corridor, you can bet they’re not there to get me a blanket. So that means I’ve interrupted whatever they’re supposed to be doing, and they have to run to wherever the blankets are, and then they have to run back to me, and then they have to go do whatever it was they were supposed to be doing before they were waylaid by a random guest who wanted a blanket.” He made a face. “Which, now I think on it, is sort of what I’m asking you to do, but truly, if I’d known you were busy and if Molun didn’t have a ridiculous sense of humor, I wouldn’t have bothered you.”
“I don’t mind,” Nisal assured him with another smile. “Honestly. How are you going to be comfortable here if you don’t get the chance to get to know where things are and get help when you need it? And, seriously, what if you got really cold? You should always know where the extra blankets are.”
Perian couldn’t help but grin at them, because they seemed perfectly willing to make up ridiculous reasons why he was not being an imposition.
They showed him where the supply rooms were, and they were on the scale of a large royal castle. So, where Perian had been envisioning a linen closet, he found a fairly large room that came complete with staff to help you find what you needed as they folded, sorted, and organized the contents. There were multiple different blankets to choose from. Remembering Renny’s dress from yesterday, Perian selected a smaller blanket of various oranges and yellows and a larger blanket that was blue.
“Thank you so much,” he told Nisal.
“You’re very welcome. And just to be clear, this is not an indication that I don’t want you to ask me for help any time you need it. But for your knowledge, at the corner of every wing on every floor, there’s a runner stationed. Their actual job is to stand there until someone needs something and then run around to get them what they want.”
Perian gaped at them. “You’re kidding me.”
They laughed. “No, I’m being entirely serious.”
And now that Nisal had said that, Perian did have a vague memory of passing some stationary staff yesterday and the day before, but he’d dismissed that as having nothing to do with him. Brannal clearly thought nothing of asking for whatever he needed when he needed it, and it didn’t seem to have occurred to him to point these people out to Perian.
“Well, I’m glad I know now. But thank you for your help anyway.”
“Anytime,” they told him. “Is there anything else I can help with?”
“Absolutely not,” Perian told them. “Go back to saving people’s lives. I’ve got these.”
He held up the blankets, and after a moment, they nodded and headed back the way they’d come.
Perian took the blankets to Brannal’s room. Once he’d dropped them off, he decided that his knowledge of the castle was obviously weak, and he really needed to become more familiar with it. He looped through the wings, just turning around and switching floors whenever he hit the royal wing so he could avoid it entirely.
It was good for exercise, it confirmed exactly what Nisal had said about those runners, and it made him feel like he had a slightly better idea of where many things were.
There was a gallery in the public wing that had a vast array of paintings and sculptures, and Perian spent some time strolling through there, looking at portraits of people he didn’t know and landscapes of places he’d never been and comparing them to where he had spent the majority of his life.
His father had chosen a beautiful area to retire. There had been gardens, forests, fields, water, and a nice-sized house. Perian was very grateful for where he’d grown up, and he wasn’t sure he’d ever want to live somewhere as large as this, but it had the advantage of all the people in it.
Perian would never want people bothering him all the time, but the knowledge that he wasn’t alone was welcome. Not that he’d been entirely alone on his estate, either, but they’d had only a handful of staff, and they’d gone home at night. It was definitely not the same. He liked the underlying hum of activity and energy in the castle. It made him feel alive.
The rumbling of his stomach alerted him that it had to be around lunchtime, and a glance at his pocket watch confirmed it was past midday and nearing one. Perian flew back through the hallways and rushed into Brannal’s rooms, completely surprised to find Brannal there.
“I thought we might—” the other man started.
“So sorry,” Perian said, grabbing up the blankets, detouring to smack a kiss to Brannal’s lips, and then heading for the door. “I’ve got another engagement, and I’m late, I’ll see you later!”
Perian rushed to the kitchen, begged for another basket of food, and then made his way back out to the garden, rushing as quickly as he could and so glad he could find his way back to the bush in question.
Renny was waiting, and her face lit up when she saw him.
“Sorry if I’m late,” he told her. “I was in the gallery, and I lost track of the time.”
Perian laid out the larger blanket on the ground so they had a more comfortable place to sit. The blanket filled most of the space, with a narrow strip of grass in front of the bench, and a slightly larger border on the other sides, where the bush sloped up around them.
“I could double it up,” he suggested, “since there’s only two of us.”
It would offer a little more of a cushion as well as more warmth.
But Renny shook her head. “My brother needs a seat.”
Perian was tempted to ask if this brother blew his sister off a lot, but that didn’t seem very polite. Renny wanted a space for her brother to sit, and it really wasn’t difficult for Perian to make that happen. Once they were both settled, Perian arranged the other blanket around Renny’s shoulders. She rolled her eyes.
“Don’t fuss.”
“I’m not fussing, I’m simply preventing the possibility of yesterday’s shivering. In advance.”
“It’s warmer today,” Renny told him.
It was about the same temperature, but it didn’t seem worth quibbling over, especially because Renny hadn’t actually cast off the blanket.
“You haven’t heard about the effort that was made in the retrieval of that blanket to ward off your shivers. That blanket is practically famous.”
She raised an eyebrow and then spent a lot of time giggling as Perian relayed his absurd morning.
“You’re silly,” she told him.
“I am most definitely silly,” he agreed.
Her smile softened, less humor and more fond , Perian was pretty sure. Well, he liked her too.
Perian wondered if she perhaps didn’t have enough silly in her life. In his experience, you couldn’t really tell an adult to make life more silly. But you could try to inject it into the lives of others.
Accordingly, Perian told Renny all about Molun’s borrowing of the most boring book ever, and they spent a few minutes coming up with the most absurd non-titles for pretend books.
Renny looked more alert and less drawn after they had eaten, and Perian wondered if he needed to suggest to someone that they make sure she was better fed. He didn’t really know enough about the situation to start making demands at this point, but he was definitely going to keep an eye on Renny. He would not hesitate to rudely leap in and make recommendations if necessary. But given that he had only known her for a couple of days, he’d reserve judgment for now.
They talked about a variety of books that they’d each read, no doubt put in their head by Molun’s silliness. Then the discussion ranged over a variety of topics: favorite seasons, favorite foods, even why demons attacked people.
“From everything I’ve ever read or been told, I don’t think they’re capable of reason like us,” Perian said. “I suppose they’re hungry.”
“They’re killing people!” Renny said angrily, her whole body tense.
Perian nodded. “And leaving people behind.”
“It isn’t fair!” she protested.
“No, it isn’t,” Perian agreed sadly. “But that’s why Brannal and the other Mage Warriors exist, right? That’s why the Warriors fight. To prevent the demons from attacking us.” He tapped her on the collar bone. “That’s why you’ve got your earth talisman, right?”
She nodded. “To stop the nightmares.”
“And why the castle is surrounded by water.”
She sniffed. “To stop the wraiths.”
And she didn’t need to worry about the carnalions, at least not yet. It took sexual maturity for them to be able to steal energy from you. Fire was one of the best protections against them, but most people couldn’t conjure fireballs, nor was it practical to threaten anyone who wanted to have sex with you with flames. Carnalions could hide amongst humans, completely unrecognizable as a threat—but they also seemed to be the rarest and the least likely to simply attack and kill people. Perian’s father had actually suggested they really weren’t much of a threat at all, but Perian knew that was an extreme view.
They were so lucky that most of the demons had been driven back during the Great Cataclysm centuries ago, but unfortunately, they weren’t all gone. Fortification protected against the lesser demons, as did the regular patrols of the Mage Warriors, Warriors, and District Wardens. Not that they could be everywhere at once. They could only take so many precautions. Sometimes, it just wasn’t enough.
Perian sought for a change of topic.
“In all the excitement of today and the blankets, I didn’t tell you about how my day ended yesterday.”
Not ended ended because Perian was talking to a twelve-year-old, but there was that whole absurd portion in the afternoon. Sure enough, the image of Perian being pelted with dirt and water and buffeted with air was enough to have Renny in stitches of laughter, lightening her whole demeanor and making her look almost entirely well. She was still too thin, but at least she was eating food while Perian was here.
“You are very silly,” was her pronouncement on the subject.
Well, she wasn’t wrong.
The castle clock tolled the hour, and he began to see her eyes darting more than once to the sun.
“Are they going to announce you missing again?”
She sighed. “Probably.”
“Had you better get back?”
“I suppose.”
“Shall I bring you a blanket again tomorrow?” he asked as he began to clean up.
“I can’t tomorrow,” she told him. “The day after?”
“I would be delighted,” he agreed.
She was staring at the spot where her brother had been supposed to sit, and Perian said carefully, “Perhaps your brother will come then.”
Renny gave a nod that looked very unsteady, and it was with difficulty that Perian didn’t ask where her brother was now so he could go talk some sense into him.
He helped her up, then folded up the blankets and piled them in the basket on top of the now empty containers. Renny insisted he take them both back.
“I’m heading right inside. I can’t take them every day. Oh, I forgot about your coat! I’ll have someone deliver it to Brannal’s room.”
“Only if it’s not an inconvenience,” Perian said, glad that she was unfazed about where he was staying. It hadn’t occurred to him to censor the story he had told her beyond leaving out the intimate details.
“Have a good rest of your day, Renny.”
He wished very much that whatever made her sad would diminish. There was rarely an easy fix for sadness, though; Perian knew that from first-hand experience. Some days were perfectly fine, and some days weighed you down like your whole body was filled with rocks. Sometimes, you could distract yourself, and sometimes, you wanted to throw the rocks at anyone who tried to get you into a better mood.
“Goodbye, Perian.”
He headed back inside, wondering if it was too soon to ask Renny more about herself. There was probably no subtle way for him to ask about her family situation. But if her brother kept not showing up, Perian was going to intervene.
He dropped the basket off in the kitchen once more and then carried the blankets back to Brannal’s rooms, brushing them off as he went. He made a mental note to give them a proper shake before he brought them back inside next time. He really didn’t want to leave dirt anywhere.
Once he’d tucked the blankets carefully away in the corner of the sitting room, he decided to go take a look at what the Warriors were up to in the training yard.
It turned out that while the Warriors were not as literally magical as the Mage Warriors, they definitely had an appeal of their own. They practiced everything from hand-to-hand combat to archery to sword fighting, and with the afternoon sun shining down on them while they exerted themselves, some of them stripped off their shirts.
Perian wasn’t the only one watching, either. It looked to him like a number of people found a reason to cross the quadrangle by the training yard. Practically speaking, cutting through the quadrangle would in fact shorten the route—although if you stopped to stare for a while, that might cease to be true. Perian didn’t know about the rest of them, but he certainly had no excuse for why he was here. If he said they had excellent form, he really wasn’t talking about their fighting skills.
They worked into the early evening, when the light waned from the courtyard. As they were breaking up, Delana appeared, heading for the man in charge, but she stopped when she saw Perian and then headed over to him instead.
“Summus was looking for you,” she told him.
Perian perked up. “Oh?”
“He’s busy this evening. You’re on your own for dinner.”
Perian deflated. “Oh, of course.”
She hesitated for a moment, an expression he couldn’t quite parse crossing her features. “You’re welcome to join us.”
Perian shook his head immediately. “Oh, no, don’t worry about me. I’m not very hungry.”
“Well, if you change your mind, the Warriors have a dining hall on the second floor on the west side, and the Mage Warriors usually join them.”
Delana lingered for another moment, and Perian forced a smile that he hoped looked halfway genuine.
She nodded and made her way over to the captain of the Warriors. (Perian didn’t know his name, but enough people had said “Yes, Captain” or “No, Captain” to make his title plain.) One look at their body language told Perian those two definitely weren’t going to miss him. He was pretty sure Delana still didn’t much like him, but the offer had been kind.
Perian stood there, watching as everyone who had been a spectator like him dispersed, a few of them pairing up with a Warrior who had been practicing, but most going on their way alone. The Warriors headed off in a clump together, perhaps to get cleaned up or to go straight to dinner.
Delana cast a last lingering look at Perian as she and the Captain headed in the same direction but then split up, her going one way and him heading off with the Warriors. Getting clean almost for certain, then. Perian was confident they would meet up again. He didn’t want her to think she needed to renew her invitation because Perian looked pathetic, so he quickly headed off at a brisk pace as though he had somewhere he needed to be.
This couldn’t be further from the truth. He tried to analyze his thoughts. Was he really this upset because Brannal couldn’t have one meal with him? He’d known Brannal for mere days, he reminded himself, and he had been injured and slept through many of them. Yes, it felt as though they connected in a way Perian had never felt before, but that didn’t mean Brannal felt the same way.
Even if Brannal did , his time wasn’t altogether his own. He was extremely important and not at loose ends like Perian. For all Perian knew, the Queen herself had asked for Brannal.
Only it turned out that wasn’t it. Perian hadn’t been watching where he was going, and it was the rising tide of sound that made him realize he was passing by the Warriors’ dining hall, now filled with people Perian had been watching such a short time ago. He spotted Delana, the captain of the Warriors… and Brannal, sitting and eating with them.
Perian made himself keep walking past before anyone could catch sight of him. He reminded himself there could be any number of reasons for Brannal to be eating there today. Perian shouldn’t feel upset, but… wasn’t it a little odd Brannal hadn’t invited him?
He was doubly glad he hadn’t accepted Delana’s invitation. He could only imagine the awkwardness if he’d shown up after Brannal had excluded him. Maybe all they did was talk about Warrior things and Brannal had thought Perian would be bored. Maybe Perian’s brain should just stop thinking about this, and if he really wanted to know, he could ask Brannal the next time he saw him.
Part of Perian winced at the very idea. Since when did he get himself into knots like this? He didn’t expect anyone he met at the pub to be inviting him to dinner with their friends. Was that it? Maybe Perian wasn’t a secret, but Brannal didn’t intend their lives to intersect all that much? Perian was for the bedroom, and everyone else was for the rest of Brannal’s life?
Thoroughly confused, Perian found himself back at Brannal’s rooms. He wished he had more experience with relationships. He sank into one of the chairs by the fire. He reminded himself that Brannal had seemed to genuinely like the time they spent together. It took time to integrate someone new into your life. Brannal must have dozens of habits and typical ways of functioning.
That made sense. The weird, unsettled feeling in the pit of Perian’s stomach told him that his emotions weren’t at all convinced.
He made himself grab one of the books from the library, back when things had been going fine, as far as he knew. Or was he being naive and missing the signs?
“Don’t be an idiot!” Perian told himself.
He was not going to turn himself inside out or behave any way other than how he was. If Brannal didn’t like Perian like this, then this liaison was going to end sooner than later.
He nodded to himself resolutely, then rose to get a lamp, light it, and sit it on the side table by the chair. He made himself look at the book… and spent a long time re-reading the same page, trying to actually take in any of the information with a marked lack of success.