Page 105 of The House Guest

“Don’t say that. You can’t help how you feel. The right answer is always to be true to yourself.” She looked overat Rosie playing in the corner. “You’d give her the same advice if she were older and in your situation.”

“Pretty sure my mother gave me that advice, too.”

She tilted her head in confusion. “Your mother?”

I told her about the rosebud at the gravesite.

“Wow.” She smiled. “See? That’s amazing. You needed that.”

“I sure did. It was the sign I asked her for.”

“Okay…” She rubbed her palms together. “So what’s the plan?”

“Which plan?” I asked.

“When you get to California.”

Nervous butterflies came alive in my belly. “I have no idea.”

“Are you calling him first?”

“I don’t think so.”

“Why not?”

“Something is telling me to just wing it.” I thought for a moment. “Because I’m afraid he’ll discourage me now that he’s involved with someone. But I think he needs to see me either way. We need to look each other in the eyes and figure this out once and for all.”

“Okay.” She scratched her chin. “But that sounds risky to me.”

“I don’t want him setting up a scene for me or trying to protect my feelings, you know? I want to see things as they are. Even if it hurts. No better way to do that than just show up. If what we had is still there, nothing should stand in the way. And if he’s moved on, I need to know that, too. Need to see it for myself.”

“Well, I’ll be crossing my fingers that you get the outcome you desire.”

“Whatisthe desired outcome in this mess?” I countered. “A custody arrangement? A long-distance relationship? I don’t even know what the future would look like. I just know I need to see Dorian and tell him I made a mistake.”

She smiled sadly.

“I appreciate your support and the fact that you’re being so understanding, given how I sprung everything on you today.”

“A true friend is not going to judge you for how you feel,” she said. “All the way through the wedding planning, I’ve sensed that something wasn’t right. Now it finally makes sense. The fact that you’d been thinking of him right before he showed up proves you two have some kind of soul connection. It was almost like you could sense him.”

I nodded and looked over at the kids playing. Was I delusional to think Dorian would meet me with open arms? He had a girlfriend now. I looked at the time and stood. “I’d better get going. I have to start getting ready.”

“Where does Casey’s mother think you’re going?”

“She thinks I’m going out there to meet up with old college friends. Sort of like a mental-health break. Casey hasn’t told her the truth, and neither have I. But as long as I’m being up front with Casey, I won’t worry so much about holding things back from anyone else.”

“Totally. And hey, it’s not a complete lie. You were in college when you met Dorian. So he could be considered a college friend.”

“Nice try.” I chuckled.

***

A couple of days later, the moment I’d been dreading finally arrived. I was dropping Rosie off at preschool, knowing I wouldn’t be here to get her this afternoon.

“Grandma will pick you up after school, okay?”

“You’re gonna be on the plane?”