Page 2
Story: The Governess of My Heart
“ H urry now, Jane dear. We are not to be late for the evening,” Mrs. Bennet cried.
“How do I look, Mamma?” Jane asked, looking at herself in the mirror.
“You look beautiful as ever, my dear. You are the jewel of Hertfordshire.”
Jane smiled in agreement, she was the eldest of the Bennet girls, and Mrs. Bennet was still worried about why she had not gotten any eligible suitors.
The Bennet family was leaving for Lucas Lodge for a supper party that night, and Mr. Bennet declined the invitation and wanted to spend time in his library.
The youngest daughters were also excited about the evening.
But Elizabeth, second to Jane, sat with a book without any excitement.
She was somehow different from the rest of her sisters.
Her interests were uncommon to young ladies of society.
She loved to be outdoors and explore nature.
Her love for books always stopped her from other womanly pursuits, and her mother was always critical of everything she did.
“You are useless to this family,” she often criticized. Although hurt by her words, Elizabeth tried not to be affected, and Mrs. Bennet frequently compared her looks to Jane’s.
“You are no match to my Jane’s beauty,” she said, with the only intention of hurting Elizabeth. Jane was extremely satisfied whenever she heard this comment.
Elizabeth had always been fond of Jane as they shared a room since childhood. But somehow, Jane did not value her as much. Her mother detested everything she did and openly acknowledged that she was devastated when Elizabeth was born, as they had expected a boy.
“Papa! Why does Mamma behave like this with me alone?” Elizabeth had always reasoned with her father.
“What do you mean?” Mr. Bennet asked, not looking at her.
“I returned later than usual from my morning walk. She said I am disobedient and arrogant, just like my blood. I do not know what to make of it,” she said, sounding hurt.
“I have no time for all this, Elizabeth. Take your book and leave me in peace,” he said.
She left the library unable to understand her father’s neglect towards her.
There were days when he would talk to her with affection and suddenly distance himself from her, but Elizabeth loved him a lot.
She understood that he was always worried about their finances. The estate of Longbourn was not flourishing as before and to add to his worry, it was entailed to a distant relative.
“How horrible it would be if you were to die, Mr. Bennet,” his wife would often worry.
Elizabeth loved her family, no matter how they behaved.
Her youngest sisters, Lydia and Kitty, did not like to obey her, nor were they well-mannered.
They flirted with every eligible bachelor they met in the village and social settings.
But Mary was of a different disposition.
She loved to play and was very silent. Though silent, she was very observant of everyone around her, and she loved Elizabeth a lot, admiring her intelligence and kindness.
That evening, they left for Lucas Lodge for the party.
In the past, Elizabeth had always loved to visit Lucas Lodge, but this time it was different.
Her best friend Charlotte, the daughter of Sir William, had married a wealthy gentleman in town some months ago.
Elizabeth missed her very much as Charlotte had been her friend and confidant since childhood.
She was sensible, and both shared the same interests in life.
“Lizzy, I am sad to leave you and Hertfordshire. I hope you can visit me in town,” she said before she left.
“Papa hates town. He hardly allows us to visit our uncle. You have a beautiful life ahead of you, and I am happy for you, Charlotte,” Elizabeth replied despite her sadness in losing such a friend and confidant. However, they kept in touch through letters.
Charlotte had a sister, Mariah, who was very much like Mary.
That evening, Lady Lucas had invited the local families for an evening of gossip and merriment. There was music, and Lydia forced the other girls to dance.
Jane enjoyed the attention she received from all the bachelors but was not impressed by any of them. She knew they were not wealthy, which mattered to her more than anything.
Charlotte was an old maid, and she married someone rich. I will get a wealthy man, too, with many estates and carriages.
Jane had slowly adopted her mother’s views on marriage as her own. She was the most selfish of the Bennet girls as she wanted everything best for herself and seldom cared about others, especially Elizabeth.
As for Elizabeth, the evening was tedious, and Jane gave her stern stares when any of the men spoke to her.
Lydia and Kitty flirted shamelessly, and her mother was oblivious to their behavior.
By the time she came home, Elizabeth had a headache. Her sisters had behaved poorly, and she overheard Kitty asking one of the men to take her for a walk. Elizabeth, who did not want to leave her unchaperoned joined them, much to the anger of her sister. The next day, she addressed the matter.
“Kitty, it was inappropriate to ask Mr. Johnson to take you to the gardens for a stroll without a chaperone. I wish you could understand this.”
“Oh! Do not be so bossy. What is wrong with spending some time alone with him? Are you scared that he may propose to me and I will get married before you?”
“Marriage is not everything in life, and you are too young to understand that. As your sister, I forbid you from doing this again. This is not appropriate behavior for our family,” she said strictly.
“Mamma! Mamma! See what Elizabeth is saying. Come here,” Kitty yelled and ran out of the parlor.
Within minutes, her mother came inside, fuming.
“What did you say to Kitty?” she asked with anger.
“Mamma! She behaved inappropriately yesterday evening. She wanted to go for a walk with Mr. Johnson without a chaperone. It is not the first time I have seen her asking men to take her away from the gatherings. I asked her…”
Before she could complete the sentence, Elizabeth was shocked by the slap that had landed on her cheek and this was not the first time her mother had hit her.
Tears swelled in her eyes.
“Mamma! I was trying to correct her flaws,” she said, unable to control her tears in shock and shame.
“Who are you? Who are you to correct her flaws?”
“I am her sister, and I am doing what you are supposed to do,” Elizabeth cried angrily.
“Be quiet! You are the last person to advise anybody in this world about morals. You and your uncouth behavior. You always wander outside even before we wake up, and I can accuse you of meeting someone and having an affair.”
“Mamma! Stop it!” Elizabeth cried, unable to bear the accusation.
“Enough! Don’t you dare utter another word to Kitty? You are not her mother, and she can do what she wants. Go to your room, and don’t join us for supper, as I do not want to see your face.”
Elizabeth ran upstairs and collapsed into the bed.
Her mother was always unkind towards her, but getting abused physically wounded her beyond measure. She wondered what she had done wrong to instigate such a reaction. She wanted to find her father and talk to him but did not have the strength to face anyone.
Elizabeth was utterly mortified by what had happened. She had always thought her mother hated her for her impertinence, but deep down, her heart whispered to her that there was some other reason.
She cried herself to sleep, unable to fathom what she had done wrong to get such treatment in life. The next morning, she met her father in the library and showed him her face. Elizabeth’s cheek was still red.
“What have I done to get this treatment from her, Papa? I know I am not her favorite child. As a sister, I corrected Kitty. Is that a crime?”
Mr. Bennet looked at her without emotion.
“Your mother told me what happened. She was angry and expressed it by slapping you; do not dwell on it. Now, leave.”
“Papa, are you serious? How can I tolerate such treatment from my own mother? I am not a child.”
Mr. Bennet looked at her with irritation.
“Yes, you are not a child. We have raised you for all these years with care and affection, but you are not grateful for anything. You always want to correct your sisters or point us out wrong; I am tired of that. Have you seen your mother behave like this towards any of your sisters? You are at fault, accept it and leave,” he yelled at her.
Elizabeth walked out of the library, and for the first time, she understood that her mother would never treat any of her sisters that way. She did not know what to do.
Why does she hate me?
She wondered for the millionth time in her life.
Table of Contents
- Page 1
- Page 2 (Reading here)
- Page 3
- Page 4
- Page 5
- Page 6
- Page 7
- Page 8
- Page 9
- Page 10
- Page 11
- Page 12
- Page 13
- Page 14
- Page 15
- Page 16
- Page 17
- Page 18
- Page 19
- Page 20
- Page 21
- Page 22
- Page 23
- Page 24
- Page 25
- Page 26
- Page 27
- Page 28
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- Page 39
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- Page 57
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- Page 86
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- Page 89