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CHAPTER THIRTY-SEVEN

SEVEN YEARS EARLIER

T he news that Laurie was pregnant had come as no surprise to Anika. Having delivered four children herself, she recognised the signs. There was a slight swelling in Laurie’s tummy, and the long time she spent in the bathroom in the mornings was a clear giveaway.

‘Who’s the boy?’ was her first question, and Laurie had been dreading it. She’d already decided to tell Anika the truth. It was the least she owed her.

‘I was raped,’ she said bluntly.

Bile rose in Anika’s throat. Laurie was speaking, but Anika couldn’t take the words in. It felt as if she was drowning in them.

Locked the door… Drugged my water.

Her temples began to throb, and she massaged them gently.

Laurie handed her a glass of water. ‘I’m so sorry, Anika,’ she said tearfully.

Why was Laurie apologising? She’d done nothing wrong.

‘Who?’ Anika asked, feeling like a sharp icicle was stabbing through her heart. Who would rape her lovely Laurie? Brenda’s Laurie? She wanted to kill him.

‘The social worker I had to see from school.’

Anika thought she would collapse with the shock. It hadn’t even been some drunken slob but a man Laurie had trusted.

‘We have to go to the school and the police,’ she said, standing up and grabbing her handbag.

‘They won’t believe us,’ said Laurie miserably. ‘He’s a well-respected professional man–’

‘Not in my eyes,’ fumed Anika.

‘In everyone else’s. I’m known at school for always getting in trouble.’

‘That doesn’t mean he can rape you. No, I’m going to the school and then the police.’

Laurie jumped up and grabbed Anika’s arm. ‘No, don’t you see, I’ll be the slag in everyone’s eyes? I’ll be the one who drank too much, whose parents were never strict enough, and whose mother had alcoholism. The girl who was always asking for it. He’ll win. He’ll get the best solicitor, and why would they listen to an Indian woman? You know what they’re like, Anika. I could be responsible for other girls not reporting when they’ve been raped.’

Anika’s shoulders sagged. Everything Laurie said was true. Anika knew it wasn’t who you were but what you represented, and in most people’s eyes, they represented the worst of everything. ‘Oh God,’ she groaned.

‘I’ll have an abortion. Then I will try hard and get my GCSEs as Mum wanted.’

‘Oh, darling.’ Anika hugged her tightly. ‘We’ll get through this together. It’ll be our secret.’

Laurie thought My life is full of secrets . But one day, the secrets would be unveiled, and the truth would be revealed. He may have broken her physically, but he hadn’t broken her spirit.