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CHAPTER THIRTEEN

SEVEN YEARS EARLIER

A nika hurried along the street. Her hands carrying the shopping bags were numb from the cold. Above her, the grey clouds were threatening snow.

‘Nippy, ain’t it?’ said Martha, her neighbour.

‘Going to get colder,’ said Anika. ‘They say snow is coming.’

‘Cheer us up, why don’t yer.’

Anika laughed and crossed the estate to her house, the shopping bags knocking against her legs as she walked. It would be good to be home and in the warm. I’ll unpack , she thought, and then I’ll go and check on Brenda and make sure she’s got some heating on.

When Brenda opened the door, Anika had to fight back a gasp. Brenda had lost even more weight. ‘Cold out today,’ she said, stepping into the hallway that needed a good vacuum. ‘Arthur at work?’

Brenda nodded. ‘I’m making dinner.’

Anika touched the radiator as she followed Brenda to the kitchen. It was stone cold. ‘Put the heating on, love,’ said Anika. ‘It’s bloody freezing.’

Brenda smiled. The word bloody coming from Anika’s lips in her Indian accent always sounded strange. ‘The electric heater is on in the living room.’

It seemed to take Brenda forever to walk to the kitchen. The state of the kitchen stopped Anika in her tracks. The rust-stained sink was full of dirty dishes. Anika glanced at the cluttered kitchen counters and began collecting half mugs of tea and empty beer bottles. ‘You sit down,’ said Anika. ‘I’ll put these in the recycle bin and then put the kettle on.’

I’ll also give the place a good vacuum before I leave , thought Anika. A casserole dish sat on the kitchen table, surrounded by onions, carrots and stewing beef.

Anika clicked the kettle on and opened the cupboard to get mugs.

‘Behind the boxes of teabags is a bottle of painkillers. Can you get them for me, love?’ Brenda asked.

Anika turned. ‘Brenda?’ she said worriedly, seeing that her friend was breathing heavily.

‘Give me two of those, darling,’ said Brenda.

Anika shook out two capsules from the bottle and gave them to Brenda. She made the tea in silence and then sat opposite Brenda, who hurriedly swallowed the capsules with the hot tea before relaxing back in her chair.

‘Let me finish the casserole,’ said Anika, jumping up again and busying herself with chopping carrots and onions. ‘Or better still, I’ve made a large batch of lamb biryani, Arthur’s favourite. I’ll drop some in. You have your tea, and I’ll wash up those bits.’ She nodded to the sink.

‘Anika, sit down. I need to tell you something.’

The tone of Brenda’s voice turned Anika’s body cold. I don’t want to hear it , she thought. I can’t listen to what you’re going to say. But she dropped back into a chair, realising she still had the knife in her hand. Gently, she laid it on the table.

‘I’m very unwell, Anika,’ Brenda said softly.

‘Let me call the doctor.’ Anika went to get up from the chair, but Brenda’s hand stopped her.

‘There’s no point.’

Anika swallowed the lump that had formed in her throat. ‘Of course there is.’

‘I’ve told no one, Anika. I don’t know how to tell Arthur. He’s not very strong, and Laurie mustn’t know. You know how badly she’s doing at school, and I know she’s drinking. I’ve made such a mess of things, Anika. I was dealt a bad hand of cards. That’s what it was.’

‘Don’t be silly. You’ve not made a mess of anything.’

From Brenda’s face, Anika could see the pain had eased. Brenda slipped her hand from Anika’s and sipped at her tea.

‘Have you seen a doctor? Do they know what’s wrong?’

‘I’ve seen them all, pet, all the quacks. I’ve had the scans. It’s my liver. The drinking, you see. I’ve got advanced liver cancer. They’re not sure how long I’ve got.’

Anika let out a small gasp before she could stop herself.

‘Now, don’t start feeling sorry for me. If you’re going to do that, you can fuck off now,’ snapped Brenda.

‘Brenda…’ Anika faltered.

‘No fucking crying, either. I’m depending on you.’

Anika took a deep breath. ‘I’m not crying.’ Inside, though, her heart was breaking. Brenda had been her best friend from the day they first moved to the estate, and if anyone had ever made one racist comment, Brenda had shot them down in flames before they had time to open their mouth again.

‘I want you to take care of my girl. Arthur will bugger off, and I can’t blame him. I’ve been lucky he’s stayed this long. He’s a good sod. Got a good heart, but she’s not his. You’ve been a good friend, and I know you won’t let me down.’

‘You should go to the hospital,’ Anika said. ‘They can take better care of you.’

‘I’m staying here. I don’t want strangers looking after me. Make sure Laurie finishes school and gets a decent job.’

‘You’ll be here to see to that. Now I’ve had enough of talking this rubbish. I’m going to call an ambulance.’

‘You do that, girl, and we’re not friends.’

‘You’re an awkward cow. I’m going to clean up and then get that curry for you. Dil and I will never eat it all; the kids always want pizza. Pizza, pizza. I ask you.’

Brenda smiled.

Anika got up from the kitchen table and began hoovering the living room with tears rolling down her cheeks.