Page 4 of Tell Me Your Desires

Chapter Three

Roused from her sleep by a car horn outside her bedroom window, Jaime groaned and rolled over, taking her pillow with her.

This was the very day she wanted to sleep away.

This date…two years ago, was the date that changed her life.

Jaime knew she couldn’t go back and redo the past. She knew she couldn’t do anything to ease the guilt she felt.

But she could work hard and give closure to other people out there.

And that was precisely why she drove herself into the ground day after day.

Only today, she didn’t want to leave her bed.

What was the point? She would only be faced with death and loss.

She had no trouble dealing with those things for the rest of the year, but not now. Not this weekend.

Same shit, different day.

Jaime dragged herself from her bed, squinting as she opened the blinds, only to be met with bright sunlight.

They would have been married by now if this date didn’t exist. Taylor would wake her with a cup of black coffee.

Jaime would complain about the type of eggs they’d have for breakfast…

ultimately choosing whatever Taylor preferred.

Not this. Alone, while she stared out onto the street.

Cold, even if the humidity in Nevada was kicking her ass lately.

None of this. Jaime—whether or not she imagined a future with a wife—never wanted this.

“Okay, come on. You’ve got this. You can handle today.” She scoffed. Just another thing she’d mastered lately. Talking to herself. But talking to herself beat drinking a bottle of scotch before breakfast.

As Jaime walked barefoot through her apartment and towards the kitchen, she caught a waft of something familiar.

A reminder of Taylor. It was only the vanilla diffuser she kept on the shelf by her apartment door, but considering it had been empty for six months, the scent presented itself now and then.

And today, of all days, it had to mean something.

Jaime rested against the counter while her coffee brewed, and there was a deep ache in her stomach when her mind refused to shift from those mostly happier times. It wasn’t always perfect, but they’d come so close.

“Tay? Are you home, babe?”

Jaime heard a soft hum coming from their bedroom as she kicked the apartment door shut, an arrangement of flowers cradled in one arm.

“Tay?”

“In the bedroom.”

Jaime kicked off her boots and shoved them out of the way with her foot.

Taylor was forever complaining about Jaime leaving her boots lying around.

It could have been the fact that they’d both come close to tripping headfirst into the door on more than one occasion, but Jaime couldn’t be sure.

She grinned when Taylor came from the bedroom and smiled in her direction.

Her fiancée had the most beautiful smile.

One of those smiles that lit her eyes up.

Jaime was a sucker for everything and anything Taylor did.

“I didn’t expect you home for dinner.” Taylor suddenly frowned, leaning against the doorframe. “You told me you were up to your elbows in a case.”

“I…am. But it’s our anniversary, and I had to at least try to make it home to you.”

Taylor softened immediately, pushing off the frame and stalking toward Jaime. She took the flowers and leaned in, kissing Jaime slowly. “Thank you. They’re beautiful.”

Jaime watched every move Taylor made as she rounded the counter in the kitchen and placed the flowers in the sink. When Taylor turned back, she sighed. Jaime didn’t know what was wrong. “What’s up?”

“I didn’t make dinner. I didn’t see the point if I was eating alone.”

Jaime opened the apartment door, lifting two brown paper bags from the floor. “That’s where I come in. I picked dinner up from our favorite restaurant on the way.” She wore a broad smile as she spoke those words, settled by Taylor’s suddenly relaxed shoulders.

But then Taylor sniffled, shaking her head lightly as she brushed a tear from her cheek. “Did you have this planned?”

“Maybe.” Jaime lowered the bags to the coffee table, opening her arms to Taylor.

When they embraced, the atmosphere felt far less tense.

Jaime knew how Taylor felt about her job, how she would drop everything to rush to the precinct or a case out there in the dangerous underbelly of the city, but this was her safe place.

In Taylor’s arms. “I’m sorry. I know I’m a terrible fiancée sometimes, but I’ll always be here for these moments.

Our moments.” Jaime pulled back, cradling Taylor’s chin in her fingers. “Okay?”

“Okay.”

“Now, should we eat before we relax for the rest of the night? I…had some plans.”

Taylor narrowed those deep brown eyes. “Plans?”

“Naked plans. You…me…chocolate sauce on those crisp white sheets you love,” Jaime said, watching in slow motion as Taylor’s features changed.

That would never happen, but the getting naked part absolutely would.

“Okay, we can leave the chocolate sauce and sheets out of this for the time being, but I can’t promise you it won’t get messy at some point.

” Jaime leaned in and kissed Taylor, smiling against her lips.

“You taste sweet. You’ve been eating cookies. ”

“I had some time on my hands. I thought I’d do some baking.”

Jaime swooned all over again. “You are really not what I imagined in my future, Tay. But do you make me happy? So unbelievably happy.”

Taylor’s brow creased. “I-I don’t—”

“You bake cookies. You make sure we have crisp sheets. You want to cuddle and relax and watch movies together.”

“So?” Taylor rested her arms around Jaime’s waist.

“So, that’s not the woman I saw myself with. Though if I’m being honest, I didn’t see myself with anyone. I know being with me is difficult, but we love one another enough to deal with any issues we have, right?”

Taylor smiled weakly, lowering her eyes between them. “We do. We always work it out, even if I hate it when you leave suddenly.”

“Because we love each other. And this time next year, we’re going to be married. Another thing I didn’t imagine happening to me.”

Taylor held Jaime close, toying with the buttons on her open blazer. “I can’t wait to be your wife, baby.”

“Right back at you.”

“So, about those plans. And that food.” Taylor narrowed her eyes, pulling Jaime flush against her. The way Taylor’s body felt, lean and supple, had Jaime wanting to remove her clothes in this very spot. But she wouldn’t. She’d do the decent thing and set the table for dinner.

While she could…

“Jai?”

“Don’t worry. We’ll get to those plans.” Jaime shed her blazer, hanging it over the back of a stool at the breakfast bar. “I need to fuel that body of yours. We’re in for the long haul.”

“Maybe…I could get dinner set up while you go to the corner store and pick me up some smokes?”

Jaime lifted her head, eyeing Taylor. “Yeah, that’s not happening. You know I’m not doing that for you. If you want to continue your habit, you can go yourself.”

Taylor groaned. “But, baby?”

“No! Not doing it, Tay!” Jaime was about to expand when her phone rang in her pocket. She sighed, taking it out. “Baros.”

“We’ve brought him in. I know what day it is, but you told me to call if we had any leads.”

“You’ve got him?” Jaime’s brows rose.

“He’s in interrogation now. Your call. Do you want me to wait?”

Jaime swallowed down the guilt she knew was rising. Taylor wasn’t going to like this, but they’d been looking for William Glover for five days. This was Jaime’s case. She wanted to see him trip himself up. “I’m on my way.”

The sigh Jaime heard from Taylor didn’t require any follow-up conversation. Her fiancée was looking at her with disappointment as their eyes met.

“Tay, I’m sorry. But we’ve got a breakthrough, and I have to be there. I can’t not be there.”

“Yeah, I know. It’s your job. Whatever.” Taylor turned her back and shook her head. “Take dinner with you. I’ll find something else.”

“Babe, come on.”

Taylor spun around, her long dark hair whipping around her face and shoulders. “No! Don’t! It’s one night, Jai. One night. Our anniversary.”

“I know. And I’m sorry, you know I am, but—”

Taylor lifted a hand, silencing Jaime. “Yeah, I know. You’re always sorry. Just go.”

Jaime turned her watch towards herself as she grabbed her blazer.

Taylor wouldn’t even look at her, but what did Jaime expect?

Time and time again, she let Taylor down in some way.

Plans were constantly interrupted. “Taylor, you know who I am. What you were signing up for. I’m a homicide detective, and when I get the call, I gotta go, babe.

Give me an hour…two, max. I’ll be back, okay? ”

Taylor cleared her throat and crossed the kitchen, kissing Jaime’s cheek. “Bye, Jai. Be safe.”

Taylor turned to walk away, but Jaime held her wrist. “Hey, I love you. Not just today but every day. And if we have to celebrate our anniversary for the next ten days until you forgive me, then we’ll do that.”

“Just go.” Taylor cast her gaze on the floor, pulling her wrist from Jaime’s grip. “I’ll see you whenever I see you.”

Jaime grabbed her keys and rushed towards the door. But something felt off. Not Taylor’s attitude—this was standard when Jaime was called away—but something else. Jaime just didn’t know what. “Hey!”

Taylor turned. “Yeah?”

“I love you.”

“Yeah. I know.”

The shrill of Jaime’s phone jolted her from her depressing thoughts, and as she reached for it, her partner’s name was flashing on the screen. “Baros!”

“We’ve got another one.”

Jaime ducked under the crime scene tape, flashing her badge at the uniform on crowd control.

She glanced up at the building the parking lot was attached to, her eyes narrowed when she immediately got a sense of the kind of place this was.

Another brothel, Jaime thought as a heavy dread sat deep in her stomach.

She hated these places… and the stuff that went on in them.