Page 43

“What game are we playing next?” Mack asks, around a mouth full of pizza.

“How about the one where I teach you to chew with your mouth closed?” I mutter, using a napkin to wipe up the mess of crumbs on the coffee table. I’m not a neat freak, but grease stains are a pain to get rid of.

“How about your mom teaches me that one?” Mack snickers. I glare at him, but at least he grabs a paper plate.

The guys are always busting my balls about how hot they think my mom is, and yes, it’s weird as fuck to hear.

They mostly do it to get a rise out of me, and I make it worse by reacting, but damn, there’s only so many MILF jokes I can take before my ears start to bleed.

“Let’s just get back to the game before I kick you guys out for overstaying your welcome,” I mutter.

About an hour ago, all three showed up uninvited with cards, drinks, and pizza.

This morning at practice, Sam and Austin quickly realized my talk with Bear didn't go well yesterday. Game night is their way of showing support and rallying behind me. And even though I threatened to kick them out, I’m glad they’re here to distract me from the mess I’ve found myself in.

If I didn’t have a structured routine forcing me to set personal issues aside, I would have crumpled under the weight of the past few days.

I nearly caved and called my mom, but the thought of telling her what happened made me sick to my stomach. I can’t handle another person I love being disappointed in me.

Austin points his pizza at Sam. “Dealer’s choice.”

Sure enough, Sam’s got the stack of cards in his hands, grinning like a loon.

“We’ve already done everyone else?” Mack groans, setting his half-eaten pizza on the plate like he’s suddenly lost his appetite.

“Unfortunately,” Austin confirms.

“What’s wrong? Not in the mood to lose?” Sam says, wiggling his brows.

I raise a brow at him. “Literal kids play your game.”

Mack shakes his head. “It’s the only game you beat us in, so you always pick it.”

Mack’s right. The game started as a joke, but now it’s the only one Sam chooses. And he’s weirdly competitive about it.

“Rules are dealer’s choice is final.” Sam reminds us.

I'm pretty sure we’re all kicking ourselves for making that dumb rule the first night we hung out freshman year for a night like this.

“Just hand out the cards already,” Austin tells his brother.

“Who’s ready to play some mother-fucking Snap!” Sam roars.

We each give him some version of an unenthusiastic grunt, but that doesn’t deter him. He shuffles the cards like he’s at some upscale casino, making a show out of it like millions are on the line. Spoiler alert: there’s not. But I guess his pride is another story.

The game starts, but my head’s not in it. My conversation with Bear wrecked me, and I'm still trying to come to terms with where we stand.

I was physically shaking when I had to close her bedroom door behind me. Afraid it would mean closing the door on us and, ultimately, a future with her.

A life without Bear isn’t one I’m willing to accept, which is why I spent all night going through every possibility of what could have happened.

No one knows me better than I know myself, which is why I can say with absolute certainty: I did not willingly cheat on Bear.

It’s only ever been her. It will only ever be her.

I already have a plan in motion, one that should give me a fighting chance to prove I’d never hurt her like that.

Unfortunately, I need to be patient for another day or two. And then, hopefully, I can get my girl back.

I won’t let this become the biggest regret of my life.

But God, I miss her.

I miss how she’d crawl into bed next to me and we’d fall asleep wrapped in each other’s arms. I miss hearing her soft, off-key singing in the shower. I miss her petal-soft lips on mine.

Bear is my sunshine, and without her, my life is a fucking dreary mess.

“Levi,” Mack nudges me with his elbow, bringing me back to the present.

When he nods toward the growing pile of cards on the table, I realize it’s my turn.

“Right, my bad.” I draw a card and toss it down.

It must be a match because Sam's hand shoots out in a flash, slamming onto the pile of cards.

“Snap, motherfucker!” he yells, sliding the cards toward him.

Before he can start gloating, the doorbell rings. Everyone but Sam lets out a collective sigh of relief, knowing that whoever interrupted us also saved us from having to hear it.

The second I get up, Mack runs his mouth behind me. “That must be the strippers we ordered for you, Levi. Cheer you up a little, buddy.”

I flip him off over my shoulder, not in the mood to entertain his joke, but it only makes him crack up more.

Not bothering to check first, I open the door. My breath catches in my throat when I see who it is.

I grip the door handle tighter to stop myself from reaching out and touching her like I want to. We’re not there yet, and I can't bear the thought of rejection.

Instead, I focus on memorizing her features all over again. Her ocean-blue eyes and smooth golden skin—I take it all in. When I reach her full lips, my heart gives a tiny squeeze of hope.

She’s smiling. Not a full-on smile—just the corner of her mouth pulling up—but it’s enough.

“Who is it?” Austin shouts, and I chastise myself for stupidly staring at Bear.

Clearing my throat, I shift closer to her, using the door as a shield between us and the three pairs of eyes watching from behind me.

“Hey.”

Damn, can I be any more fucking lame?

“Hi, do you mind if I come inside?” Bear asks tentatively, like she’s afraid I might say no.

“Sure,” I nod, feeling the sting of how formal this feels. I miss the ease we used to have around each other. Even in the beginning, it was never like this with us. “The guys are here, but I can kick them out if you prefer?”

“We can’t see you, but we can still hear you,” Mack shouts, causing Bear’s smile to widen, and my heart thumps at the sight.

If it weren’t for me standing here right now, I’d have thought the damn thing had given up on me already.

Unfortunately, her smile fades quicker than I’d like. But when she peeks up at me from under her long lashes, her eyes look brighter.

“It’s probably better if they’re here for this conversation.”

I go from hopeful to worried in a heartbeat at her words. Swallowing thickly, I open the door for her—a silent invitation.

When Bear sees the guys, they greet her with the same enthusiasm as always. If there’s one thing I can count on, it’s that they’ll never make things awkward. Embarrassing? Always. But never awkward.

Maybe that’s why Bear asked them to stay. She’s about to put the final nail in the coffin of our relationship, and she wants them here for me when it happens.

We sit down on the couch, and I'm practically on the verge of hyperventilating. Bear keeps a careful distance between us, and my breathing becomes even more erratic. The unknown is killing me.

“Feel like joining us for a round of Snap, Bear?” Sam asks, tone laced with enthusiasm.

“Fuck, no, we’re putting a lid on that,” Mack grumbles, grabbing the cards and shoving them out of Sam’s reach.

Bear laughs softly, but I can’t even enjoy the sound with how tense I am.

“Thanks for the offer, Sam, but I’m here for a different reason.” Her eyes slide to me, and I try to smile, but whether my lips cooperate is hard to tell.

“Floor’s yours, Teddy Bear,” I murmur, low enough that only she can hear.

Bear sits up straighter, addressing all of us when she speaks. “I’ve been thinking a lot about Saturday night.”

If she didn’t have our attention before, she sure as hell has it now. I swear, no one dares to move or breathe too loudly as we wait to hear what she has to say.

“I don’t even know where to start, so I guess I’ll start at the beginning.

” Her shoulders lift in a small shrug as she shifts to face me more than the guys.

“When I found you at the beer pong table that night, I could tell you weren’t acting like yourself.

You were still you, so it wasn’t enough to justify my paranoia but enough to notice it. ”

“I felt it, too.” My throat is thick with emotion, but somehow, I get the words out. “I chalked it up to not eating enough or having a shitty tolerance, but I was way more out of it than I should’ve been.”

I’m a muscular guy, and I’m tall. I could shake off whatever I was feeling enough to walk in a straight line, but there was no doubt my head was spinning.

“I agree, but we were at a party. I thought you were drunk. And since we were leaving soon, I let you walk off without giving it a second thought.” Her smile is apologetic, but she keeps going before I can say anything.

“Anyway, I kept telling myself that everything was fine. And then I couldn’t find you, and well, you know… ” She frowns down at her lap.

She doesn’t have to fill in the rest. Everyone in this room knows how that night ended.

“I can’t tell you enough how sorry I am that you had to see that video.” My tone reeks of shame, but she needs to know how deeply this is cutting me up inside.

“The video is actually the reason I’m here,” she says, looking up, not a trace of anger in her tone. “Something about the whole thing seemed so scripted. How convenient that the person you were with was blonde and dressed like a ballerina? It’s almost like they wanted you to think it was me.”

“Holy shit, you’re right, Bear,” Mack speaks up. “I didn’t even think about it like that, but it makes sense. If they knew Levi, they’d know there’s no way he’d willingly go off with a girl who wasn’t you.”

I throw my friend a grateful glance, which he acknowledges with a nod. We’re not big on feelings in this group, but we’re loyal to a damn T.

“It was only a theory, but Pia and I, uh, watched the video again, and I spotted something I missed before.”

My stomach turns over itself, knowing she put herself through that again. Bear pulls out her phone, swipes at it a few times, and then hands it to me.