Page 5 of Shielding his Legacy (Shattered SEALs #7)

Eva was humiliated. She knew this was going to be difficult, but the reality of facing Gavin with their child surpassed even her expectations.

He had taken one look at Abby and completely shut down. He didn’t want to hold her—didn’t want to look directly at her, even—and his reaction hurt Eva more than she would have thought possible.

For in her heart, her daughter’s entire life was laid out as a series of hopes and dreams, but more than anything she wanted Abby to have the family she herself had not.

Eight years in foster care had scraped up her insides like a scalpel rolling around in her soul.

She knew what it was to be unwanted, and she physically ached from Gavin’s reaction.

And while she’d thought she’d finally found a family in the Livingstons, she knew now that had been a fever dream that reality couldn’t contain.

She’d been holding out hope for more, and even though she’d told herself it wasn’t going to happen, now it was a certainty. Abby’s father didn’t want anything to do with her.

Suddenly, it was all too much.

Running for her life, being threatened by the man outside the subway, the likely murder of the police officers protecting her, and being rejected by this man. Tears threatened to spill onto her cheeks as she fought for control. It was a battle she was losing.

Damn it, she wasn’t a weeping wallflower. She was in charge of her own life, her own happiness, her own destiny. But she’d forgotten that. She’d walked in here hoping he would fix everything like a knight in shining armor, and she hated herself for it.

Her cheeks burned as she watched the baby drink her bottle, no longer certain she wanted Gavin’s help at all but unable to think of an alternative solution. Anything would be better than this torture.

“Tell me why you’re barefooted,” he said.

She fought her reluctance to speak. “I had to leave in a hurry.”

When she didn’t continue, he said, “I’m listening. Tell me what happened.”

“A police officer was murdered in Central Park.”

“I heard about that. A detective.”

“That’s right.” She lifted her chin, forcing herself to meet the eyes of the man who didn’t want her, surprised by the intensity of his presence.

“I was there taking pictures for a photography contest—thirty-five-millimeter black-and-white film, not digital. I heard the shots and ran like everybody else, but when I developed the pictures, I realized I had images that might help the police find the killer. I had them blown up and dropped them off at the police station.”

He narrowed his eyes. “What were you doing here? New York’s a long way from Phoenix.”

“It had nothing to do with you,” she snapped defensively.

Her shame deepened more than she would have thought possible under his withering gaze.

She knew what he was thinking. That she was pathetic.

That she’d proclaimed her love and begged him to stay with her after the weekend they’d spent in bed, then followed him across the country to ensnare him with their child after he’d rebuked her.

“I didn’t even know you were in New York until this morning. ”

“What was in the pictures?”

Grateful for the change of subject, she said, “The shooter. The photo was dark and far away, but definitely enough to help identify the guy who did it. I even got an explosion from the barrel on film. I thought I was doing a good thing.” She stared at a bookcase behind Gavin, her stare unfocused.

“But the next day I came home and found my apartment had been ransacked.”

“Did they take anything?”

Just talking about it brought back the panic, the violation that had coursed through her upon seeing the mess. “Film negatives. Memory cards. Every last one I had.”

“They were looking for the shots of the murder. They knew you’d gotten photos.”

She nodded. “Yes. But they didn’t get them. I’d brought them to a printer the day before to get the pictures blown up and scanned, and I accidentally left the negatives at the store.”

“Did anyone other than the police know about the pictures? The media?”

She shook her head. “Just the police.”

“A friend, maybe?”

“I don’t have any friends.” Her eyes dropped with the admission. It didn’t matter what he thought of her. Not anymore. “I went to the police again,” she continued. “In hindsight, that was stupid of me, but I did.” She shook her head.

If she had to do it all over again, she never would have brought those pictures to the police station.

It was awful, but it was true. She had no idea she’d been putting her own safety in jeopardy by being a good citizen, no premonition that danger was waiting to strike.

It occurred to her that Gavin would never have been so obtuse, and the gap between them widened in her mind.

“I was so naive. They put Abby and me in a safe house up on the East Side, but someone broke in this morning. I woke up to gunfire outside the bedroom. I think they killed the officers, then they came for me. I grabbed Abby and my bag and went out the window and down the fire escape. A man chased me all the way to the subway, and the subway brought me here.”

“How did you know where to find me?”

She shook her head, annoyed that he had twisted this around, and raised her chin. “This isn’t about you, Gavin. I didn’t have anywhere else to go.”

“But you knew I would be here. How?”

“There was an article in the paper this morning saying you’d joined HERO Force, along with the address.”

He frowned. “I’ll have to thank my boss for that.”

She put the baby over her shoulder and stood, anger fresh and ripe for the picking.

“How dare you? If you don’t want us in your life, that’s your choice.

But you don’t get to make me feel like crap for coming here when I was desperate to keep our child safe.

Our child, Gavin. Both of ours. I had nowhere else to turn. ”

He pushed off the desk. “Whoa, wait a minute. I wasn’t being sarcastic, Eva.

” He put his hands on her arms, the shock of him touching her jolting her senses for an instant before he let her go.

“I’m glad you found me. I can’t imagine how scared you must be.

I can help you. I want to help you both. What do you need?”

He couldn’t even touch her without recoiling. That realization raked her insides raw, even as the promise to help her shored her up. All she wanted was to get out of there and get away from this man for good.

She took a deep breath. “A few hundred dollars to get to Phoenix.” Mentally, she was adding up the expenses of the move, horrified by the total that kept growing. “A little to cover clothes and shoes, some things I need for the baby. A hotel until I can get on my feet.”

She’d need first, last and security for a new apartment.

Remembering how long it had taken to save those up last time, she wanted to be sick.

Warily, she snuck a look at him through shamefully wet lashes.

His brow was heavy, the intense look in those piercing green eyes threatening to be the death of her, annoyance and frustration forming a heady mix.

She hated herself in that moment, for every time she’d missed him or wondered what he was doing, what lucky woman he might be with.

How had she ever felt that he cared for her?

Loved her, even? The man in front of her couldn’t be more cold and angry.

Clearly, he was upset that she’d found him—no matter what he said to the contrary—and in that instant she cursed the flat tire that had started this mess.

If she’d never met Gavin, she would have stayed with her boyfriend, Jake. They might even have been married by now. Her parents would still be in her life, her future laid out before her like a predetermined roadmap to socially acceptable happiness.

Is that what you wish had happened?

If you’d asked her before today, she would have said she’d never be sorry for loving this man, that she gladly would have traded Jake and her family and every last plan she’d ever had for her future for what she and Gavin had shared.

What a fool she’d been!

Her arms tightened around the baby. She couldn’t be sorry for her child, no matter what else had transpired. She would gladly take every ounce of humiliation and ask for seconds if it meant she could be Abby’s mother forever.

“No,” he said, shaking his head. “I don’t want you two at a hotel, not after everything you’ve been through. Besides, there are cameras all over this city. Facial recognition. If the dead police detective was killed by someone in the department, we have no idea how deep this thing goes.”

Eva couldn’t help but notice his use of the word “we,” and she hated how much she liked it.

Because for the first time since all of this started, she didn’t feel quite so alone, and she knew she was stupid for feeling that way.

Still, when she shrugged, she noticed how much looser the muscles of her shoulder had become. “What’s the alternative?”

A muscle twitched in his jaw as his expression hardened. “My house. You two are coming home with me.”