Page 6 of Shadow Boxed (Shadow Warriors #2)

Chapter five

Muriel fought to suppress the anger...the grief.

..to suppress the tsunami of memories flooding up from the depths of her soul.

Memories she’d shoved down for years. Memories of Wolf…

of O’Neill…of the mistakes of her youth.

She’d held onto this secret for twenty years, even while so many of her friends and family had tried to pry it from her.

In her close-knit community on the Brenahiilo, everyone believed they had the right to know the identity of Daniel and Gracie’s father.

Yet now, when it was too late for any kind of relationship between her son and his father, she’d tossed the news out like a weapon. And she’d done so in front of one of the very men she’d tried so hard to keep it from.

She took a deep breath, and then another, trying to calm the anger and the spiraling grief.

As her twin, Samuel could sense her emotions, and strong emotions from her would steal his focus from where it belonged—on him, on healing from his catastrophic injuries.

It was essential to lock down her feelings when she was near him, to cushion him from her pain.

Nor did her brother know Daniel was gone.

The pair had been close, father-and-son kind of close.

The news of Daniel’s murder would hit her brother hard, would interfere with his recovery.

She needed to shield him from that agony for as long as she could.

Long enough to give him a start on his recovery.

Her son was gone now. She couldn’t bear to lose her twin as well.

“Mur!” Olivia’s voice dimly registered.

Why hadn’t Samuel or Wolf mentioned that O’Neill had joined the warriors of Shadow Mountain? To find him here, after so many years of looking, on the heels of Daniel’s death was…soul breaking.

“Mur!”

Of course, Samuel hadn’t known she’d been looking for O’Neill.

Nobody knew. Not even O’Neill. Back in high school, there was constant fighting between O’Neill and Wolf, with her brother aligning with his best friend.

Explaining why she needed to find their enemy meant admitting to everything, which would have escalated the war between the three men.

“Mur!”

Fingers latched onto her arm, halting her plunge across the ER’s waiting room. She swung around, ready to skewer and shred the man who taken her heart and her virginity, only to abandon her once he’d gotten what he’d wanted. Which obviously hadn’t been her heart.

Only it wasn’t O’Neill who grabbed her elbow.

“O’Neill!” Olivia’s voice rose. Shock had rounded her brown eyes and dropped her jaw. “O’Neill is your twins’ father?”

The question hit her like a slap. She stumbled to a stop, her face hot, her eyes burning.

Shit. If Olivia had heard that announcement, Wolf must have too.

His vehicle was right next to theirs. Had he attacked O’Neill?

Twenty years ago, just hearing O’Neill had gotten her pregnant would have been all the justification he needed to beat Angus to a pulp.

Or try to, anyway. The two had been evenly matched back then, with their battles ending in stalemates more often than not.

She spun around and headed back out the sliding glass doors only to find Wolf’s vehicle was gone. So was O’Neill. She searched the parking area, looking for blood, scraps of fabric, or boot scuffs, anything that would indicate a fight. But nothing...it looked like both men had simply driven off.

Didn’t that just figure...she’d finally told O’Neill he was a father, and he’d bailed on her—again.

Of course, Wolf could have tossed O’Neill in his golf cart and hauled him off to beat him up in private.

The pair might have matured enough to gain control over their emotions—enough to even work together, apparently—but she doubted their earlier animosity had disappeared completely.

Especially since Wolf considered her family.

A little sister to his protective older brother.

During her adolescence, Wolf’s brotherly attitude had been a constant source of frustration.

He’d been her first crush, so his attitude had been painful and humiliating.

Until she’d found real love and experienced true pain and humiliation in the wake of her love’s absence.

Still, Wolf would hate that O’Neill had left her pregnant and alone.

Olivia’s gaze dropped to Muriel’s bottom lip, and she winced. “Look, you’re obviously upset. Let’s visit Samuel after you calm down.”

As soon as Olivia looked at her lip, it started stinging. Perfect. She rolled her eyes. At this rate she was going to chew the damn thing right off. She followed Olivia to a set of chairs in a quiet corner of the waiting room, far from the reception desk.

“Wow,” Livvy finally said, sounding stunned.

“Your brother will not be happy to find out O’Neill’s the twins’ father.

He detests that man.” She paused, before adding slowly, “No wonder O'Neill looked so familiar when I first met him. Gracie looks like him. Same brown hair…and green eyes. I’m surprised nobody figured it out.”

Muriel was too. Although Gracie’s eyes were more hazel than emerald and her hair ash brown rather than nutmeg.

There were enough differences between father and daughter to blunt the resemblance.

Plus, nobody had known about their relationship, nor would it have occurred to anyone that she’d betray her brother and hook up with his enemy.

In truth, after he’d bailed on her, she’d expected O’Neill to tell them himself. Wasn’t that why he’d hooked up with her? To take her virginity and toss it in Samuel’s face? In Wolf’s face? By hurting and humiliating her, he’d hurt them too.

“Judging by the shock on his face, he didn’t know, did he?” Olivia asked, her voice slow, like she was connecting the dots in her mind. “You never told him?”

“I couldn’t find him.” Muriel’s voice tightened beneath a wave of ancient frustration. “He up and disappeared. I looked for him for years. Even hired a PI, not that he had any luck tracking O’Neill down either.”

And Shadow knew the billable hours he’d charged during his investigation had been insane.

“You didn’t tell O’Neill about Gracie back in the parking lot,” Olivia pointed out evenly.

There was no judgement in her voice. But Muriel still flinched.

“I never got the chance.” She avoided Olivia’s eyes.

They both knew she was lying. She’d been the one to walk away. She could have stayed. She could have told him he had another child. A living child. A daughter.

But she’d lashed out instead, wanting him to hurt like she was hurting. Shame rose; Gracie had gotten the short end of that tantrum.

“You can’t hide this news from Gracie, Mur. Or O’Neill.” Oliva leaned across the armrests to squeeze her bicep. “He’ll find out sooner or later that Daniel has a twin.” She squeezed Muriel’s arm again. “And Gracie will hear about him. You need to tell her yourself, before word gets out.”

Muriel flinched. “You’re right. I know you’re right.” The admission bruised her tight, hot throat. “I’ll tell her when we return to your house.”

She’d wait to tell O’Neill that he had a daughter until after she told Gracie. Gracie came first. O’Neill could wait. Assuming she could even find Angus. The man was skilled at hiding from her.

“I can’t believe you never told Samuel.” Livvy pulled back in her seat with a shake of her head. “As close as you two are…”

Muriel sighed and massaged her temples, where an ache was forming.

“I couldn’t tell him. You weren’t around back then.

There was so much hatred between Wolf and O’Neill.

They were constantly fighting. Samuel always held back during the fighting, but he was clearly on Wolf’s side.

I was afraid if they knew O’Neill had gotten me pregnant, they’d think he targeted and used me to get back at them.

” Which was the conclusion she’d eventually reached.

She grimaced. “If the two ganged up on O’Neill, they would have beaten him to a pulp.

I was afraid they’d kill him if they found out. ”

From what she’d seen of O’Neill in the parking lot, he and Wolf still looked evenly matched.

They’d both matured. Hardened. O’Neill’s face was more chiseled, squarer, with lines and grooves that hadn’t been there during his adolescence.

He’d filled out too, across the chest and shoulders.

Beneath his t-shirt, his shoulders and arms were roped with muscles. The man obviously worked out.

But so did Wolf. The two warriors were of a similar size and build, too. Both were in excellent shape. Both skilled in the warrior ways. All of which made them dangerous. More dangerous than they’d been back in high school.

“It’s been twenty years though, he’ll wonder why you keep it a secret from him for so long,” Olivia said with a sideways glance.

Muriel was afraid of that too. But every time she’d tried to come clean to her brother, her chest tightened and her belly churned. As the cycles turned, it was easier to avoid the subject.

“It never occurred to him, to anyone, that the twins’ father was from the Brenahiilo ,” Olivia observed.

Muriel sighed. The twins had come early, as was often the case with twins, so everyone assumed she’d conceived after leaving the Brenahiilo and settling into summer classes at WSU. “I didn’t find out I was pregnant until fall classes began.”

And what a shock the news was. O’Neill had worn a condom.

And she’d been on birth control. Conception shouldn’t have been possible.

Yet she’d conceived, and the trajectory of her life had completely derailed.

Within a couple of months, she’d gone from the bright new possibilities of college back to the Brenahiilo and adult responsibilities.

She didn’t regret choosing the twins though. Daniel and Gracie were worth every sacrifice she’d made.