Page 45 of Serena (Shattered Queens #1)

I’m holding on to my pendant that was around my neck when I woke up this morning.

“When was the last time you came to visit?” Ian asks as we pull up to my childhood home.

“It’s been five years. Since I moved away with Yuri.

They’ve come to visit me during the holidays, but I’ve mostly spent them with Yuri and her family.

” He gets out of the car and comes to my side.

I wince as I get out. My whole body aches.

Ian gave me the reprieve that I needed. I didn’t spiral and didn’t have nightmares.

I was finally able to get some rest, but looking at the house in front of me, I’m already feeling emotionally exhausted.

I take in the house. It’s a one-story colonial. The yard is impeccable, and the lawn is vibrant with freshly cut green grass. Pink and red carnations adorn the front yard. My mother’s favorite. Growing up, there was always a fresh bouquet in the house.

“Are you sure you want to come with me?’ I ask him. “My relationship with my parents isn’t the best, so I’m pretty sure things are going to go sideways at some point.”

He tightens his grip on my hand. “I’m here. The question is, what will be my title for this introduction?”

I didn't think of that. “How about my very special man friend?”

He pulls me to him and slams his lips over mine. “Try again,” he growls, but before I can answer, the front door opens.

“Serena?” my mother asks. “Qué estás haciendo aquí?” She looks at Ian and repeats the question. “What are you doing here?”

“Hola, Mamá, I was in town on business, and I wanted to stop by for a visit.”

“Come in. Your father is in the backyard.” I enter the house and see the changes. Nothing is as it was five years ago. The paint on the wall is a different color, they’ve completed renovations to the entry, and it seems like the furniture has been replaced.

“Anthony, Serena is here.” I hear my father’s heavy footsteps. He stops in the kitchen entrance.

“What are you doing here, Serena?”

“Hola, Papa, good to see you too.”

“We didn’t know you were coming. You should have called.” And there it is.

“It was very short notice. I’m heading back to Veridian Bay in a couple of hours.” Ian coughs next to me, and the tension seems to dissipate. For now. “Mamá, Papa, this is Ian Kayde. He’s my—” I don’t finish the sentence; my father interrupts.

“Your boss.”

“Dios mio, Serena, you’re just introducing us?”

While my mother is swooning over Ian, I feel my father’s disapproving stare drilling a hole in the back of my head.

I turn to face the man whose approval I’ve sought my entire life.

I was never a mommy or daddy's girl. It was just me. I’m grateful for everything they did for me growing up, but isn’t that what parents are supposed to do?

Spending time with your daughter shouldn't be the bare minimum.

They always worked so hard to prove to others they belonged here.

Whether it be in the suburbs or as business owners.

“Will you and Mr. Kayde be staying for lunch?” he asks. My mother is practically drooling over Ian. Why wouldn't she? He’s what she always wanted for me.

“Ambos necesitan quedarse y comer,” my mother insists. I guess we are staying for lunch.

“It would be our pleasure,” Ian answers for both of us.

The next hour is spent with Ian answering questions from my parents.

I see my father glancing in my direction.

He’s very good at keeping his feelings to himself until he explodes.

He and my mother are professionals at being passive-aggressive.

Mostly to each other, but I've received some of that ire. They don’t have a marriage; they have a business, which neither will ever leave. Fuck, I hate it here.

My mother whipped up some flautas. “Mexican food, mi favorita,” Ian says to my mother, then looks at me and winks. That’s what he’s been calling me for months, his favorite Mexican dish. I can’t help but laugh. Pendejo.

“What business brought you to town, Serena?” Of course, my father would get straight to the interrogation. Well, here goes nothing. I hold my pendant and gather the courage to say the words because this is a no-discussion topic in my family.

“The bar.”

The table goes silent. I can see my mother’s panic as she looks at Ian, whose features have hardened. I turn to her. “Don’t worry, Mamá, he knows what happened to me.” I see her face turn red. She isn’t embarrassed; she’s ashamed someone else knows what happened to me, better yet, to her.

“Serena, why would you tell him? He’s your boss.”

My father mocks, “Do you really think that’s all he is, Carla?” I don’t bother to argue. “Look at the way he’s looking at her,” he reprimands my mother.

“You’re right, Papa, I’m also fucking him.” Surprised by my brazenness, Ian spits out his water.

“Serena.” My mother shouts my name in her disapproving tone. “What’s wrong with you?”

“Nada, Mamá. There is nothing wrong with me.” I turn to my father.

“There has never been anything wrong with me. Just like what happened wasn’t my fault.

” My father gets up and walks away. I follow, as does my mother and Ian.

One of the biggest losses of that night at the bar was the respect my father had for me.

He blames me for putting myself in that position.

Yes, I went there, but it wasn’t my fault. Therapy helped me see that.

“Papa, you don’t get to walk away from what happened to me.” He turns and looks at me with the same shame and disgust he had over five years ago.

“So, not only are you sleeping with your boss, but you decided to tell him the shame our family went through because of your irresponsible behavior?” I’m taken aback. I feel like my father just slapped me.

“Anthony!” I hear my mother yell, but I’m too stunned by my father’s words.

He continues, “Do you remember everything your mother and I went through?

The police, the news, everything! We couldn't leave the house because you and your friends decided to go have some fun. Put yourself in danger, and look at what happened!” I stand there and take all his venomous words.

Ian steps in front of me. Shielding me, but there is no stopping my father.

“And you, Mr. Kayde. Sleeping with your employee. What kind of man does that? What position have you put her in?” My father directs his attention to me.

“What happens when he gets tired of you, Serena? Do you think his family will accept someone with your past?”

Ian looks at me, but I can’t bring myself to meet his eyes.

“Fuck her past. Some father, no, some man you are to throw what happened to her in her face. I will never get tired of Serena. I will, however, make sure she never has to see your goddamn face again.” He turns to my mother.

“And you, Carla. How can you stand there and let him speak to your only daughter like that?”

I step in front of my father. “I’m sorry you still believe that as a woman, I don’t have the right to live my life without ‘putting myself’ in a situation.

What I’m most sorry about is that I tried to live up to your expectations my whole life.

I see you didn’t have a problem spending the money from the settlement from my rape.

” I turn and head to the door. Neither of my parents follows. Only Ian.

We sit in the car while I try to compose myself.

I knew my parents struggled with what happened to me.

When I won the lawsuit against the bar, I thought that would serve as a form of compensation to them.

If it weren’t for the media, no one would have known.

When my dad’s siblings found out, they stopped visiting.

That just added to my shame. My own family didn’t support me through my crisis.

“Serena.” I feel the warmth of his hands on mine.

“He’s right, you know. My father.” I let out a shaky breath. “About my past—what will happen when your family finds out? And we work together. You’re my boss. This is such a cliché. Boss and employee sleeping together.” His hand moves to my cheek, and I lean into him.

“My family will love you. As far as work, I told you that I will quit if that’s what it will take.”

“Can we just go home?”

“Anything my girl wants.” He pulls away from my childhood home, and I don’t look back.

We land in Veridian Bay, and Gus is waiting for us, as per usual. I slept the whole trip. Physically recovering from my night with Ian and emotionally from the entire trip. I’m starving. I haven’t eaten since the piece of toast this morning. I turn to Ian, who’s typing away on his phone.

“Let’s get something to eat, I’m starving.”

“That sounds good, but just something to hold you over—we have an appointment at seven.” I'm too hungry to care right now. I press the partition down. “Gus, can we stop at our usual spot for a snack, please?”

He smiles. “Of course, Serena.”

“Your usual spot? You have a spot with my driver?” Ian turns to Gus, who’s grinning, having expected this reaction from Ian.

“Well, yes. Sometimes when he takes me home, we stop by a smoothie place. Super good.” I smile, egging him on. “Technically, you can’t get mad since you’re the one giving him the orders to babysit me.”

“I’m going to fire him.” He looks at Gus.

“You and I both know you aren’t. So leave him alone. Now be nice, and I’ll let you fuck me however and whenever you want.” I put my hand on his inner thigh.

“No, I won’t be nice, but just because it’s you, I won’t fire him. But I’ll still fuck you whenever and however I want.”

After we stopped for our smoothie, I noticed Gus was driving away from the city toward the coast. “Where are we going?”

“To my parents. They invited us to dinner. I figure, why not get that out of the way today? Mom’s been dying to meet you.”

“Ian! I’m not ready. Shit, I’m in yoga pants and a T-shirt. How long have you known about this?”

“Since we boarded the plane earlier. I met your parents; you should meet mine.”

My father’s words come to mind. What if he’s right and Mr. and Mrs. Kayde don’t like me? What if they find out? All the what-ifs are playing in my head. I’m spiraling.

“Serena, stop that. Stop overthinking.”

I hate that he’s pushing me to do this. I’m not ready. Shit, I don’t think I’ll ever be ready. I’m too busy catastrophizing to notice we’ve arrived. I’m having a panic attack.

“Baby, look at me,” he repeats in a sterner voice. “Serena, look at me now. Breathe. They are going to love you.” I nod and try to control my breathing. Taking my hand, he leads me to the front door. As we approach, the door opens.