Page 41 of Serena (Shattered Queens #1)

Idid exactly what I said I wouldn’t do. I ran.

As soon as I left the restaurant, I went to my apartment and packed an overnight bag along with work essentials.

I went straight to the airport and bought a one-way ticket to my past. Caligo Valley, a town nestled between the beautiful mountains of Colorado.

It’s also twenty minutes away from the major airport.

Arriving, I’m greeted by my friend Angie. I called her after I bought my plane ticket, which was three hours ago. Like me, her past has brought her back to Caligo, but unlike me, she’s made peace with it, or so she tells me.

“Thank you so much for picking me up. I know it was short notice.” I hug my friend. We met freshman year of college. She and I have very similar upbringings, so we clicked instantly.

“Will you be going to your parents?”

“Hell no, I wouldn't make it through the night. Plus, they aren't the reason I came.” Angie was there that night. She had the misfortune of finding me. It’s something that we don’t talk about, but trauma bonds people.

“How’s the teaching going? Still love shaping young minds with the wonders of the world?” I try to lighten the mood. Being a teacher is hard, but being a professor at the University you attended, well, that’s a whole different story.

“It’s going very well. Maybe too well.” I don’t pry. My friend is very open when she wants to share. If she doesn’t follow up, that means it’s time to move on to another subject.

“Sorry I couldn’t make it to your birthday party.” There it is. The change in topic.

“Don’t worry about it; you didn’t miss much.” Technically, the party was over when all hell broke loose.

Finally arriving at my lodging for the next couple of days, we grab a late-night snack. Angie looks troubled.

“Serena, do you want me to go with you?” I reach across the table.

“No, I need to do this on my own. I’ve been avoiding this trip for a long time.

” She squeezes my hand. “Thank you for offering. We need to plan a trip that doesn’t include me facing my trauma.

" We both laugh, but it’s a weak attempt to hide the concern that is so evident in her face.

“Angie, I promise to call you if I need you. Now, I need to get some rest. I’m exhausted. ”

“You should have told me you were going. Or at least stayed with my dad.” Yuri is all but screaming at me. I decided to check in and make sure she was all right. She and Xander left my party in a hurry.

“I need to do this on my own. And doesn’t your dad have a new girlfriend?”

“Yeah, don’t remind me. That man can’t date someone his own age, but he’s happy, and this one is my favorite so far. Come to think of it, this is the only woman he’s called ‘girlfriend.’” She pauses. “Serena, I’m really worried about you. Have you talked to Ian?”

“No.” I'm avoiding the topic. He’s been calling and texting nonstop. “I just need to take care of this.”

“Please call me if you need me to fly down.”

“I will,” I lie. She’s got her own things going on, and I think they may be serious.

The first night here, I didn’t get any sleep.

The nightmare returned. The next day, I stayed in bed and worked.

Penger, now Kayde Investments, has a small office here, but I don’t intend to go anywhere.

Instead, I stay in my hotel room and work remotely.

I don’t feel like being around others. “Don’t isolate yourself,” I tell myself.

Last night, it was the same thing. Same nightmare and more spiraling.

I woke up so anxious that I spent the morning throwing up.

I need to do this. I’ve lived with this for five years.

Everyone is moving on with their life, and I’m just stuck in an endless cycle of self-sabotage and misery. Just shattered.

I step outside, and the fresh air and breeze cool my clammy skin.

I’m staying close to downtown. During the day, it’s full of life, with kids playing in the park and residents going about their daily routines.

Caligo Valley is known for the beautiful mountain scenery, hikes, hidden waterfalls, and majestic sunsets.

I love experiencing all the seasons; it’s the only thing I miss. It’s as beautiful as it is dangerous.

The evenings are vibrant and full of life. Locals and tourists come out to party, but not as much as the students from Ivystone University, my alma mater. They overrun the night. Yuri and I both attended Ivystone.

Yuri has always been so charming and the life of the party, which helped during our freshman and sophomore years of college.

She loved going to parties, the football games, and tailgates.

Your typical college experience. Me? I was focused on my grades, getting an internship, preferably with a company that would hire me straight out of college and offer me a good salary and benefits. Security, as my parents would say.

I start to walk the path that I’ve avoided for years.

I can feel my legs hesitate, but I have to push myself.

My body is responding to the trauma it went through.

I instinctively touch my scar. As I approach my destination, I get the feeling of being watched.

It feels cold, and the hair on the back of my neck stands on end.

I look around but don’t see anyone. Fuck.

It’s my paranoia again. Respira, I keep telling myself.

I come to a stop. My heart is beating so fast, I think it might explode.

My hands are trembling uncontrollably. My stomach turns at the sight in front of me.

The remains of what used to be I.V. Bar come into view.

I realize my vision is blurry. Tears are streaming down my face.

The breeze dries them, but they just keep coming. I take a step closer.

Five years ago, this was a two-story bar that college students and locals preferred.

The first floor had a bar and a small stage for local bands to perform.

The second floor had a smaller bar with pool tables.

It was the place to go to party. Now, it’s just gone. Burned to the ground. Good riddance.

Last fall, Mr. Lobo called to inform me that I.V. Bar had burned down with the owner inside. There wasn’t much of an investigation. The owner was always suspected of being involved in what happened to me, but it was hard to prove. The case was closed, and everyone moved on. Almost everyone.

I take a deep breath. I need to calm myself. The scent that’s become my favorite over the last couple of months surrounds me. I sense him behind me, watching me. This is different; this is the warmth from a fire. This is a blanket of darkness. It envelops me—comforts me. My step falters.

“I got you, baby.” I look up to see him. He’s here. Ian—he’s here. In the place where my nightmare began. How did he know where I was? I haven’t responded to any of his messages. I told Yuri not to tell anyone where I was.

“Ian, what are you doing here?” My voice is panicked. I’m not ready for him to know this part of my life. I feel like I’m going to be sick. I turn, and the little contents that were in my stomach are now all over the sidewalk.

“Shit, Serena.” I feel his hand on my back. Rubbing circles, comforting me. “Let’s go sit down.” He leads me to a bench I hadn’t noticed was there. Looking around, I see a car parked on the sidewalk close to me. Fuck, I hadn’t heard him arrive.

With panic in my voice, I say, “What are you doing here? And how did you know where I was?” His hand moves a lock of hair behind my ear. I’m pretty sure there’s vomit all over me. I cringe. His touch is so tender, it eases some of my inner turmoil.

“You were avoiding me. I had to see you. As far as knowing where you are. Well…” He pulls out his phone and shows me. “I’m tracking you.”

I’m pretty sure I misheard him. “You’re tracking me?”

“Yes.” That’s it, no further explanation.

The fucking balls on this man. He makes me so mad, but I don’t yell or scream.

Because deep down, I know I need someone here with me.

That someone needed to be him. Otherwise, I would never share this side of me.

This is the push I’m giving myself. “Why are you here, Ian? After the party…”

“You know why I’m here, but if you need to hear it, I’ll tell you.

” He turns my face to him. His eyes are soft, unlike days ago.

“I can’t stand the idea of being away from you.

I’m going crazy without you near me. If you don’t want to speak to me, so be it.

Just let me be near you.” He kisses my forehead.

“I’m going to protect you, so if you get mad about me tracking you, I don’t care.

You can shoot me, stab me. Whatever you want, but I’m not sorry.

I need you to know that you pushing me away is a moot point.

Get that through your head once and for all. ”

I’m so mad at him. The curated persona that I have worked so hard to maintain is being stripped away. A part of me resents him for it. Another is thankful.

The tears break free, but I’m too proud to seek refuge in his arms, and he knows.

So he does it for me. He wraps his arms around me and just holds me while the dam breaks.

“I’m always going to be here for you. Yes, I’m a jealous asshole.

I know you don’t feel you can tell me things.

I’ll be here whenever you’re ready to let me in. ”

I sit in silence for what seems like hours. Then the words start to pour out.