Page 25

JULIA

Jaeger Duke knows where we live. We don’t have a lot of time.

I can already hear Tonya in the next room with Dan, packing shit.

Damnit, we’re going to have to take the truck with the busted rear gate and the bad transmission.

And all our power tools are on Catalina.

What are we going to do for work? Rent out Dan’s boat?

It’s hard to relax.

Honestly, I should be prepping with them, but I’m under the covers with a screwdriver between my legs. I need Caspian to be part of whatever we’re doing. One, because I miss him, but two, Tonya pointed out that he’s the weapon I tried to murder Jaeger with. Better if the screwdriver stops existing.

I get wet enough to get it inside me, but I can’t get the consent thing out of my head.

I have to keep my mind on fucking.

What did he say when he came? It was so hot.

If I change. And can’t. Change back. You should know .

Ah, right. His breaths broke up his sentence. Spinning the ridged handle, I can practically hear him in my ear.

All this time. When I was at. Your hip or.

There’s never been a man like him. His attention was fully on me.

In your hand. I always. Loved you .

“Say yes,” I groan, right before I come.

“Yes,” he hisses, jaw tight, coming inside me. “Always.”

We still don’t have anything for Caspian to wear, so I run down to Tomás’s apartment. He’s up and in full makeup as if he’s ready to go to work for the evening.

“Oh, you heard,” he says.

“Heard what?”

He hands me a letter. I scan it quickly.

“They’re suing you? For putting a Luigi sticker on his Cybertruck?”

“It was a removable sticker, okay?”

“For the entire cost of the truck?”

“Not a mark on it.” He fans his face with both hands, flashing his long painted nails. “Ugh. This shit is clogging my fucking pores.”

The Dukes are going to win the case. They always win. What’s the point of being in politics if you can’t sue a cocktail waiter for putting a removable Luigi sticker on your shitty truck?

“What are you going to do?”

“Do? Fight this shit. Beat them or get ruined. What else?”

“You could… I don’t know… run?”

“Do these colors run?” He indicates his outfit—a mustard, cyan, and fuchsia combination that I couldn’t get to work even if I cared to try.

“I guess not. Speaking of. Long story but—do you have any guy clothes I can borrow?”

He looks me up and down as if I may be possessed by some wayward demon. Then he tilts his head as if wayward demons are actually kind of cool.

“What do you mean by ‘guy clothes’?”

Caspian’s taking forever in the bathroom. I knock lightly.

“Does anything fit?”

“It’s tight, but it’s fine.”

“Let me see.”

“Give me a second.”

He sounds distant. Flat. As if something is bothering him.

“What’s on your mind?”

“Nothing.”

“I don’t have time to play emotional detective.”

The door swings open. It’s the first time I’ve seen Caspian in clothes, He’s wearing pastel pink jeans and a butter-yellow button-front shirt printed with tiny penguins. Like everything Tomás handed me, it’s a size too small and two seasons out of fashion.

He looks almost as incredible dressed as he does naked.

“You forgot about me,” he says.

“I did not!”

“The demon told me. It said, ‘She forgot about you for a moment, so you became untethered again.’ Tethered to you. That’s why I turned back into a screwdriver.”

“I don’t know what to say. I have a lot on my mind. Maybe you were back-burnered, but I didn’t forget you.”

“I know.” He takes me by the shoulders. “But you have to be aware of how it happens. So if you can’t find me, or I’ve turned back, you know why.”

Am I supposed to think about him constantly? When he’s not right in front of me, can I get absorbed in anything? Am I allowed to daydream? Watch TV? This is a lot of responsibility.

“We have to break this thing.” It’s as if I’m considering a walk to the moon. I don’t even know what the task is. What are the steps? In what order? Do I build a staircase to space or get a PhD in astrophysics? What’s on the punchlist for breaking a curse?

“It told me something else. It was partly about my crew, but it said, ‘The curse is stronger than any one of you, but not stronger than her.’”

“Her, who?”

“You.”

“I don’t know how to break a curse!”

“My mother said once that a curse can only be broken at the source.”

I want to question his mother’s authority on the subject, but that would send us into another conversation.

Tonya and Dan are already packing the truck, and my partner hasn’t even met my screwdriver.

The sun will be up in a few hours and I have no idea where we’re going.

Caspian is leading me somewhere and I may as well let him take me there.

“So,” I say. “The kid in white is the source of the curse?”

“The kid in white.” He nods and takes a deep breath. “And it has to be broken for all of us. Me and my crew. I won’t leave them behind.”

He tilts his chin upward a little and makes eye contact with me, letting me know that he’s dead serious. He’d rather be a screwdriver than a man who leaves his brothers. He’s too loyal to abandon them.

How is everything about this man so hot?

“I like this side of you, Caspian Cavallo. And as far as your friends go”—I throw my duffel bag over my shoulder—“I can’t wait to meet them.”

“You know what that means?”

“Do you?”

“I think I do.”

“So let’s not play games here, okay?” I drop the duffel. “Let’s lay it all out. I gotta fuck three more tools to get you all back.”

“Are you okay with that?”

“Are any of them assholes?”

“Depends what you mean by asshole,” he says.

“Abusers. Gaslighters. Manipulators. Emotionally or physically violent.”

“If it’s business…” He shrugs. “Gotta do what’s gotta be done.”

“I thought you said there was no ma?—”

“Shush.” He presses a finger to my lips, then removes it quickly. “Anyway. That’s Enzo’s job. But with women, he’s a pussycat.”

“Fine. As long as, in a non-business context, they’re not…” How many ways can a guy go bad? So many more than I have the time to describe. “Violent. Creepy. Disrespectful. Needy. Fill in the rest.”

“If any of them don’t treat you like a queen, I’ll help you forget them right back into the toolbox. Forever.”

“You okay with me fucking other guys?”

“ These guys. No problem. Anyone else, and I have a problem.”

“Then we’re on the same page.” I lean down to pick up my bag, but he takes me by the shoulders to look me straight in the eyes.

“If you ever have any doubts, you’ll let me know.”

I picture all the tools. They all have handles or parts I could consider using, except one.

“Honestly?” I say. “I’m a little concerned about the level.”

Tonya and Dan are by the storage space next to our parking spot, and the problem becomes apparent before anyone says a word. Our shit is all over the place. Boxes open. Drawers emptied. Shelves lightened. But there’s a lot, and the truck bed already looks fullish.

“That’s not gonna fit,” I say.

“That’s what she said,” Dan adds.

Tonya looks toward me, rolling her eyes at Dan’s joke, and sees Caspian for the first time. I was so concerned with packing up, I forgot to prepare her, and myself, for the meeting.

“Tonya, this is Caspian.”

“Nice to meet you,” he says.

She crosses her arms and gives him a glance from toes to head.

“I still don’t believe it.” But she can’t stop looking at him.

“That he’s hot?” I say as if I don’t know exactly what she means. I’m trying to spare Caspian’s feelings. “Fine. Maybe that was just a matter of opinion.”

“No, he’s definitely hot.” She approaches him until she has to tilt her head up to look him in the eye.

“Thank you, Tonya,” he says softly, with a slight nod.

“Your story is insane,” she says. “So insane it could be true. Too insane to make up. But if I find out it’s bullshit, the earrings are coming off.”

“It’s not bullshit, but let’s say it is.”

“Just for fun.”

“For fun, let’s say I invented the entire thing. Let’s say I did some tricky magic a few days ago, and again, just now, to convince Julia I changed into this and back again. And let’s say it’s all just to get her to like me.”

Like him? I like extra marshmallows in my hot chocolate. I like a clean refrigerator. Saying I like Caspian is an understatement, but I’ve only known him, with legs and eyes, for a few days.

“You mean fuck you,” Tonya says.

“Sure. But say that’s true and I’m a liar and I tricked her. Do you think you’ll have a second to kill me before she does?”

She smirks then quashes it. “We’re a team. We’ll do it together.”

“Deal.” He holds out his hand to seal it, and they shake.

I finally exhale and realize I hadn’t breathed for the entire conversation.

“I’m Dan,” he says when the shake breaks. Holds out his hand. “And I want in on that deal. If you’re fucking around with her, I’m gonna kill you too.”

“Really?” Caspian cups Dan’s face with a little, painless slap, then leaves his hand there to grip his entire lower jaw. This is the mafia side I never got to see, and it’s intimidating as hell.

“Yeah,” Dan replies through a squished mouth.

“You think they need your help?”

“Maybe not with these threads.” Dan grasps Caspian’s shirt, mocking for the colors, the style, the overall gayness of the outfit.

“Julia got them for me, and they’re perfect.” I don’t realize how tight his grasp is until Dan tries to wriggle away.

“Okay, dude. Ow.”

Caspian lets go. “You all right?” He reaches for Dan’s face again, but gently.

“I’m cool. I’m cool.” Hands up, Dan takes a step back.

Caspian smirks, holding his hands to match Dan’s, then lowers them.

“We gotta make some choices,” Tonya says, redirecting me from the pissing contest. “What are we doing? Because if we take off without paying the rent, all of our shit gets sold. We continue to pay the rent and we’re broke in two months.”

“Do you have a preference?”

“Yeah.” She sighs. “I want to just go on with life as if we didn’t do anything wrong.”

“Since we didn’t.”

The boys have stepped to the side. Dan punches Caspian’s arm. They laugh. Dan takes another swipe.

“JJ Dick’s going to blackball us all over town,” Tonya says.

“Work’s gonna dry up,” I say.

“And lawyers aren’t cheap. We might have to sell everything anyway.”

“But we have people and a place. We have Black Beauty and this stupid storage space with the things we use to live. All of it is our responsibility. We might have to sell it all, but that’s different than leaving it behind.”

“Ow, ow, ow!” Dan cries.

Caspian has him in a headlock and is administering noogies like a big brother proving his dominance.

“Do I get to keep Mr. Awesome Parasailing?” Tonya asks.

“I think he likes you.”

“Ow! Fuck!” Caspian’s shout echoes off the concrete walls. He lets Dan go and rubs his arm. “Jesus. You broke the skin.”

“Put your arm near my mouth and that’s what you get.” He puts his finger right in Caspian’s face. I’m not sure if they’re really going to come to blows.

Caspian grabs Dan by the back of the neck and pulls him into a hug. A second later, they’re back-slapping and laughing.

No blows today. Tonya can keep Mr. Awesome Parasailing, and it looks as though I get to keep my screwdriver.

We’ll stay on the Duke enemies’ list until he gets bored or indicted.

Maybe we’ll need to find the boy demon in white to break the curse.

Maybe all I’ll need to do is get intimate with the crew from Dock D.

No matter what comes next, we go back up to the apartment and tell the boys the plan to stay. Dan was looking forward to leaving, but when Tonya promises to learn how to run the boat if we do need to split, he agrees.

So that’s that. We stick together. Duke’s going to do whatever he’s going to do, and we’re going to live our lives.

That night, after dinner, Caspian holds my hand as I lay the three tools on the bedspread.

“I think Tony’s our best bet.” Caspian’s on the chair where I keep my half-dirties. He’s tall enough to put his feet on the mattress. “He’ll figure out the money right away. Get that off the table.”

“This is Tony?” I hold up the level.

It’s made of wood with metal edges. One side’s metal is engraved in inches, the other in centimeters.

Three circles are set with glass tubes that measure a plane’s relationship to the curve of the earth.

Vertical, horizontal, and a forty-five-degree angle.

The liquid in the tubes is still calibrated perfectly.

That’s all fine and good. The problem is that it’s all sharp edges and angles. It doesn’t have a smooth handle that feels nice on soft girl parts.

“He wouldn’t hurt you.” Caspian takes the tool from my hand and lays it with the others.

“Not on purpose.”

“He won’t.” He kisses me. “I won’t.” He kisses down my neck and between my breasts, then pulls up my shirt to get his lips all over my body. I lean back, lying on the bed while he pulls off my jeans. “One more time, just you and me. Then we can figure out how to get Tony back.”

“And you’re sure you’re okay with that?”

“One hundred percent.” He kisses his way up my thigh. “He’s worthy of perfection.”

“Okay. If you say—” The last word ends in a gasp as he licks between my legs.

My concerns get lost in his attention, and it’s fine. We’re set.

I have my punchlist in my head.

There’s a curse to break. A business to run.

All I can worry about is what’s in front of me.

One tool at a time.

——

Thank you for reading!