Page 16 of Savage Sacrifice (The Savage Six #4)

TATUM

I curl my fingers into my hair, tugging at the long strands as despair threatens to creep up my spine even stronger than before.

I can’t handle this. The worry, the uncertainty, it’s all too much.

It’s selfish of me, I know, but despite understanding why Lincoln had to… I can’t say it. Regardless, it doesn’t mean it doesn’t cause me great pain too.

Blaze snapped his neck like it was nothing, and Lincoln crumpled to the floor like a sack of lead. I was on my feet in an instant, breaking his fall as my heart hammered in my chest, but no sooner did I lie him down gently, did he disappear altogether.

I thought we would have more time, a moment to grieve, but I was wrong.

“You hanging in there, Tatum?” Minnie asks, cutting through my thoughts, and I tilt my head to glance at her. The way the corners of her eyes crinkle as she offers me a soft smile confirms that my thoughts and feelings are etched all over my face.

She’s holding it together, and it’s her brother, her twin, who has taken the plunge to find Polaris. She’s managing to hold strong while I wobble, and I’m the one with the connection to him still.

The tethering is strange. It’s like a rope has been tied around my chest, tugging at my heart and invisibly anchoring him to my soul.

It’s there, I can definitely feel the weight of it, I just don’t know exactly where the other end of that tether is anchored, so it’s not offering any reassurance right now.

“Bryony, what options do we have here? I don’t think Tatum is going to manage much longer being cooped up inside,” she states, placing her hand on my arm and squeezing extra tight in comfort, while also pulling me from my headspace.

“I’ll manage,” I rasp, and she gives me a loving yet pointed look, confirming she can see right through my bullshit.

My lips purse, ready to put up a fight, but I see the need gleaming in her gaze, too. She needs to take control of something; she needs to command a situation to keep her focused so she isn’t lost to the pain, too, and the least I can do is offer her that.

“Uhm, this entire room is spelled. I could move it to another location, but I can’t make it grow in size. So whatever you want to do isn’t going to be overly strenuous,” Bryony offers, and a spike of irritation curls through me when I take note of the ease with which she witches.

If Polaris had been asked that question, she would have stumbled, panicked, rushed to her grimoire with feverish need, desperate to have the answer. But in comparison, Bryony operates with much more ease because she was given the opportunity to be a witch for a far longer time.

I wanted that for Polaris.

Fuck.

I still do.

Swiping a hand down my face, I sigh, turning my attention back to Minnie, but it’s Wylder who interjects from his seat at the desk.

We’re all still clustered in the alpha’s office at the wolf dorms, but I think Minnie is right, I need to get out of here.

Well, all except Blaze, who left a few hours ago to deal with some things.

“Why don’t we go somewhere outside. Maybe the fresh air might help us all?”

I nod, and he rises from his seat, which kicks Asher into action from his sprawled spot on the sofa.

He stretches his arms above his head as he meets my stare.

“If we have to keep it to one spot, how about we go to the little hideout Tatum has in the forest?” My heart lurches as I think of the spot he’s referencing and all of the memories I have with Polaris there flood through my mind.

“The maze, right?” he clarifies, and I gulp, nodding in agreement.

It’s on the edge of my tongue to decline, to think of somewhere better, but in reality, he’s right.

It’s the perfect spot. I’m never going to feel closer to Polaris than I do there, and if I’m trapped in this vortex of being connected to Lincoln without truly knowing his whereabouts, then it’s the only spot that might calm my racing heart.

“If we can make that happen, I think it would help,” I admit, turning my attention to Bryony.

She nods, though her brows gather slightly in confusion. “For sure, but I don’t know if I know where you’re talking about,” she murmurs, and I grunt.

“The place you found Polaris in the woods after your coven tried to unveil her magic.”

My tone is harsher than necessary, but it’s uncontrollable. Recalling the sadness I felt in her that night leaves me ready to bring the world to its knees, and I’m sitting before one of the people responsible for that pain and sadness, friend or not.

Guilt taints her eyes and she grimaces, but nods, which only makes Minnie frown. I don’t know if she knows about that night, or whether Polaris disclosed it, but it’s slightly unfair to bring it up now when Polaris seems to be over it.

I shrug, shaking the concern from my limbs. We’ve got much bigger issues to deal with right now.

“If you need to bring anything, grab it now. It will only take me a few moments to prepare the relocation spell,” Bryony offers, and I nod, immediately darting for my backpack nestled against the side of the sofa.

As I hike it over my shoulder, a sharp tugging sensation vibrates through my chest, unsettling the tether I feel, and it steals my breath, but quickly calms a moment later.

I heave in a breath or two, startled with the panic and fear that the connection was severed, but I keep it to myself. There’s no need to worry the others now that I know it’s still there.

With the only item I need firmly on my back, I turn to the others and we all gather in the center of the room where the sand is still marked out on the floor. Bryony nods in confirmation to us all before she begins to mutter under her breath.

Two blinks and the room shifts, the light dimming as we find ourselves nestled among the trees for shade.

My pulse quickens as my gaze zones in on the spot I first saw her hiding from me, heightening as I recall the moment I showed her my art in the far corner, before my attention settles on the hedge with the slight dip in the top from where I fucked her with my fingers.

Fuck.

She’s everywhere.

I can practically smell her in the air.

It’s intoxicating and soul-destroying all at once.

A hand lands on my shoulder, pulling me from my thoughts, and I turn to find Minnie looking at me with concern etched into her features.

“Let’s get settled so we’re not going insane.

Unless you want to jog on the spot and burn off some energy?

” she offers, and I shake my head with a grimace.

Exercise outside of my wolf form is not my cup of tea, and the smirk on her face tells me she knows it too.

“Drawing it is,” she declares, nodding at my backpack, and I smile, nodding along with her.

Everyone awkwardly stands around while I choose where to settle myself. Before I decide on where to go, I walk the perimeter of the sand that is now lying in the grass beneath my feet. The spot in the corner where I showed Polaris my art is inside the boundary, and I drop my backpack to the ground.

Wordlessly, I leave the others to it as I pull out my sketchbook and pencils and start drawing. The desire and need to see Polaris takes over and my fingers move on their own accord. I’ve drawn for so long that it’s become muscle memory at this point.

I’m in the zone, and minutes pass me by. Every scratch of the pencil against the paper is a piece of me scrambling for purchase. It’s only when Wylder scoffs in surprise from above me that I’m pulled from my focus.

“Holy shit, Tatum. That’s stunning,” he murmurs, awe lilting his voice, and I hum in acknowledgment. “How the hell can you draw her from memory like that?” he asks, dropping down to sit beside me.

He reaches for my sketchbook the moment he’s comfortable, and I let him take it. Not even minding when he runs his thumb over the pencil marks like I usually would.

It’s my favorite picture I’ve drawn of her to date.

There’s not an ounce of loneliness or sadness in it, and that’s because she’s not alone. Lincoln is beside her, hand in hand, keeping her safe.

My heart aches.

“What if he’s not okay and we’ve lost them both?” I breathe, turning my attention to Wylder, who gulps before turning to look at me.

“We can’t think like that,” he rasps, and I nod, hating the brush off that it feels like, when a shadow casts over us and Asher drops down onto the grass across from me. He bends his knees, wrapping his arms around his legs as he sighs.

“It’s fucking hard not to, though,” he grumbles, and I nod in agreement.

It’s hard seeing any of us suffer, but Asher… damn.

“He’s tethered to you, remember? We have to stay positive with that knowledge,” Minnie adds from her spot over the small hedge, a sad smile on her face as Bryony runs her fingers through her hair in an attempt to comfort her.

“But where to? We don’t know if it’s the afterlife or here,” I admit, my shoulders slumping in disappointment, but the moment I lock eyes on my drawing of Polaris and Lincoln, the sliver of hope blossoms once again.

“Can you still feel it?” Bryony asks, and I nod.

“Yes, but that doesn’t explain it or offer a guarantee,” I mutter, not really making any sense, but my thoughts are jumbled and I’m scrambling. For sure we found Krystal, but that wasn’t like this. Not really. The risk we’ve taken, the risk Lincoln has taken, is on another level.

“Is there anything we can do, Bryony?” Wylder asks, scrubbing at his cropped hair, and she shrugs.

Silence claims us, helplessness taking root as we struggle, even in our new surroundings.

“Wow, calm the party, it’s a rave out here.”

I frown at the sound of Blaze’s voice as he approaches, snacking on an apple as he assesses us all.

“How did you find us?” Wylder asks, and he shrugs.

“You’re not quiet,” he replies, and I scoff.

“We literally weren’t saying a word,” I insist, and he taps at his temple.

“In here.”

“You can’t read our minds, don’t act like you can,” Minnie interjects, and Blaze rolls his eyes playfully as he leans back against the shrubs, obnoxiously taking a loud bite of his apple.

“Where have you been and why are you so… playful?” Asher asks, confusion thick in his voice, and I nod in agreement.

He’s slightly out of character.

“Eating some bunnies, want one?” He cocks a brow at Asher, whose nose crinkles in distaste.

“Bunnies?”

Another eye roll. “I’m a vampire, I need blood.”

So he takes it from bunnies? That feels even more out of character. Is this an alternate universe?

“You’re too joyous,” Wylder grunts, and he smirks.

“No, I’m just hopeful,” he says with a shrug, and jealousy captures me.

“How?” I rasp, desperate to feel it as much as he does, but he simply shrugs again.

“I can feel her.”

“How?” I repeat, and his gaze finally turns my way as he shrugs again, and I immediately consider ripping his shoulders from the sockets.

“I don’t know, I just can.”

“Thanks, great talk,” Asher grumbles, and I scrub a hand down my face.

I need some of that optimism instead of the gloom that burns deep in my soul and the layers upon layers of sadness that consume me.

I’ve never wanted to live more in my life, and now I’m floundering in a world that doesn’t make any sense without Polaris or Lincoln.

The chime of a ringtone cuts through the air, alerting all of us as we glance at one another.

It takes a moment, but I quickly realize it’s coming from my backpack.

Diving inside, my heart stops when I see the name pop up on my screen.

I swipe to answer the call before I can even suck in a breath before I breathe.

“Linc?”