Page 10 of Savage Sacrifice (The Savage Six #4)
LINCOLN
W hen the world is falling apart around you, the most important—and most difficult—thing to do is to not crumble along with it.
I’ve faced struggles before, I’m no stranger to pain, anger, and frustration, but never in my life have I felt anything this debilitating.
Breathing, functioning, focusing, it’s all too much for me to handle.
How am I supposed to stand strong as the alpha of the wolves when I can’t even stand firm as a man. Not just any man, but a man losing his purpose in life. One he took for granted.
Is this my karma for being an asshole? I think it is. Deep in my soul, it feels like the strongest truth I have. But there’s a core part of me, maybe more my wolf than anything, that sees it differently.
This isn’t the time for me to acknowledge I’m an ass and accept the consequences. It’s my time to acknowledge my downfalls and still choose to rise above them. Failure won’t break me, it will make me. That has to be the way.
Sighing, I swipe a hand down my face before tilting my head back toward the spray of water cascading down over me.
It’s not hot enough.
It’s not powerful enough.
It’s not even remotely close to what I need, but unless you’re a silver-haired beauty with pink, rosy cheeks, and fire in your blue eyes, then you’re never going to be what I need.
I left everyone in my office to come up to my room for some space, maybe the opportunity to think too, but it seems my breath hitches more and more with every inhale as I wallow in despair and anger.
Desperation claws at my insides, sending tingles down my spine, and I feel my wolf just as irritated as I am. But not for the same reason.
Fighting against him, I grind out a raspy huff as I plant my hands on the tile wall, attempting to steady myself and my breathing, but it’s futile.
Something needs to be done. We should have done something already, but we’ve been unnecessarily wasting time.
Forty-eight hours.
That’s how long she’s been gone for, yet it feels like an eternity.
I feel hollow inside. Broken. Irreparable.
My eyelids scrunch shut, my distress levels continuing to reach new heights as my fury burns brighter. I can’t face looking at the pain in my sister's eyes anymore. Not when I feel the same cuts deep in my soul.
There has to be a way.
My wolf burns through my bones. There is a way, it’s screaming in my mind. I was just hoping for another. The idea isn’t entirely foolproof, and it might not be possible, but with a little magic, it could be.
A slim chance is better than no chance.
I just have to be willing to sacrifice.
Just like she did.
Shutting the shower off, I sigh. My mind is in overdrive, and it only grows worse the longer I keep my thoughts trapped inside.
If I don’t act, my wolf will.
I can still taste her skin against my tongue from when I sank my teeth into her throat, claiming her as my mate. I bet it’s not truly healed yet either, and she’s already gone.
A snarl hisses from my lips as my wolf threatens to edge to the surface. Following the silent command in my mind, I quickly towel dry myself and throw on a pair of black sweatpants and a fitted black t-shirt.
It’s only when I’m dressed that I catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror above the vanity. My hands ball into fists before I rest them on the marble top, glaring at myself. My eyes shimmer, my wolf making sure I know he’s there, and I nod.
The doubt drifts away with it.
Inhaling slowly, I exhale before mouthing the words to myself. I watch my lips move in my reflection, and it settles something inside of me.
It’s the right thing to do, it’s the best option, and I have to find a way to take it.
My lips purse as I push up off the vanity to stand tall, a sense of pride running through my limbs as I nod at my reflection before heading for the door.
Every step fills me with purpose, each one stronger than the last, so when I reach the office at the back of the dorms on the ground floor, I barrel right through the door, leaving it open, and everyone startles at my appearance.
Bryony and Minnie are snuggled on the sofa together, Tatum is tucked into the other corner, arms folded over his chest as he peers through his hooded lashes at me.
Asher, however, is sitting in my desk chair, feet up on the surface as he frowns at me, while Wylder paces back and forth in front of the window, stepping in opposite tandem to Blaze, who is just as restless.
“I know that look in your eyes,” Asher states, dropping his feet off the desk as his frown deepens.
“You do?” I ask, forcing myself to remain calm as I take the seat across from him.
He tilts his head at me, and I know that the fact that I haven’t called him out for being in my seat is only allowing him more insight to appraise me.
“It’s the look you get when you have a tough decision on your hands,” he states calmly, and my pulse flickers at the truth in his words. He must hear it because he cocks a brow at me.
Thankfully, before I’m forced to say a word, Minnie rises from the sofa and braces her hands on the back of my seat. “Who is making tough decisions?” she asks, shifting one hand to my shoulder as she squeezes in comfort, and my chest tightens as Asher hums.
“Lincoln.”
My sister’s hand stiffens on my shoulder at the exact same time Blaze and Wylder pause in front of the window, both slowly turning to face me, and I can already feel Tatum’s eyes burning into the back of my skull.
Fuck.
“About what?” Minnie asks, the nerves evident in her tone as her voice grows higher in pitch.
I’m rendered speechless for a moment, the panic setting in, but I shake it off. I’ve never been one to shy away from responsibility, and as their alpha, they deserve better from me.
Clearing my throat, I stare straight at Asher since he was the one to ask. “I have an idea and I think it’s the only chance we’ve got.”
Silence descends over the room for a moment before Minnie releases her hold on my shoulder and moves to sit on the edge of the desk. Her eyes bore into me, but I don’t turn her way. I can’t. Not yet.
“I don’t like that frown,” she states, and I try to relax my facial features, but it feels impossible.
Instead, I buckle down and continue to avoid her gaze.
“Look at me,” she breathes, and I shake my head, eyes remaining locked on Asher.
Her heart rate quickens, and I know my time is limited.
“If you’re going to come up with some brilliant idea that involves hurting me, which is what I’m guessing your face is about, then you can at least look me in the eyes while you say it,” she snaps, and my gaze flips to her.
I nod once, understanding how my silence is only making the situation worse for her. “Bryony and I have our marks.”
“ Matching marks,” Blaze adds, and I roll my eyes at him.
“Regardless, she’s a witch, I’m going to need her magic here. So even then, it still has to be me,” I explain, and Minnie’s frown deepens as she crosses her arms over her chest, tilting her head at me in confusion.
“Here? Where else is there?” she asks, and I shrug, trying to downplay the whole thing.
“On the other side.”
She rolls her eyes at me. “You’re talking cryptically, Lincoln, spit it out.”
“Death. He means death,” Blaze blurts, hitting the nail on the head as he stares at me just as inquisitively as the others, while Bryony remains behind me, giving nothing away.
“Thanks, Blaze,” I mutter, disdain heavy in my tone, and he shrugs.
“You were being dramatic, I was assisting you in getting to the point,” he clarifies, and I refrain from telling him to fuck off since there are more pressing matters unravelling between us.
Minnie blinks at me, unshed tears glistening in her eyes as she presses a hand to her chest. “Death? You can’t die, Lincoln. I can’t lose you too.”
I place my hand on her leg, trying to offer her some comfort, but it does nothing but make her tremble more. “That’s where the witch comes in.”
“I’m not sure how,” Bryony murmurs, finally inserting herself in the situation as she moves around to the other side of the desk.
“I need you to find a way to keep me tethered here, so I can keep my thoughts, my knowledge, and everything else, but put me on the other side of the veil, if there is one. I’ll find her.”
I’ll find her.
Three words said with such confidence, I believe it myself.
“Lincoln, no,” Minnie whispers, her hand landing on top of mine, and I offer her a tight smile.
“It’s the only way to find Midnight.”
“It’s not,” she insists, and it’s my turn to give her a pointed look.
“Does anyone else have a better plan?”
Silence descends over the room again, confirming my thoughts before Minnie grumbles with irritation, but it’s Wylder who speaks next.
“But if you die and lose your magic, you won’t be a wolf anymore.”
“I know.” It’s a clipped answer, but my wolf pleads for it. The marking I left on her flesh, it means everything.
“Who would be our alpha?” Asher asks, steepling his fingers together as he glances at me, but before I answer, Wylder interjects again.
“Never mind being the alpha, you can’t lose your wolf like that.” He throws his arms out in frustration, so I try my best to explain.
“My wolf is the one who settled on the idea. I can’t…
I can’t do anything, see anything, feel anything else.
He won’t allow it.” Each word comes out stronger than the last, driving my point home while simultaneously feeding my wolf the words he wants at the same time.
“And with regards to an alpha, it would likely go to a vote or a brawl, I wouldn’t be around to know, but I expect one of you motherfuckers to decide among yourselves to fight for it. ”
“Linc, this doesn’t make sense,” Wylder states, and I sigh.
“No, it does. It really does. Admitting it out loud does help, and right now, I feel like it’s the only chance we’ve got if Bryony is willing to see if it’s possible,” I add, and she nods, nervously nibbling on her bottom lip.
I don’t trust her, not even an ounce. There’s something I’m missing, but my brain refuses to focus on it when there are bigger issues at hand, like trying to find Polaris.
“But losing your wolf, Linc, that’s a lot. It’s more than a lot,” Minnie breathes, worry tainting her features, and for the first time, I smile. A true, raw, genuine smile.
“She’s worth it, Minnie. She’s worth everything.”