Page 18 of Rulebreaker (Gamebreakers #4)

EIGHTEEN

Lily

I don’t know how these people eat so much.

If I ate like this regularly, I wouldn’t fit into a single thing I own.

And it would be close to impossible to say no because Briar is an amazing cook.

Just like she’s a great mom, a great friend, and according to Atlas, an incredible assistant. All while being a single mom.

I can’t help but wonder about Frankie’s father.

What kind of dickhead would leave someone like Briar? And even if he did, how could he leave Frankie?

Atlas was cagey when I asked, saying Briar has never told anyone Frankie’s father’s identity, but he plans to find out someday–one way or another. I don’t know what that means and it’s not my place to question him, but I understand his frustration that the guy just walked away.

Not that it seems to have hurt Frankie in any way. She’s smart, confident, and so incredibly loved–I don’t know a lot of kids who have the kind of support and affection she has from her extended family. It’s heartwarming to watch everyone with her.

Especially Atlas.

I don’t plan to have kids for a long time, but my ovaries sit up and take notice every time Atlas interacts with Frankie.

Because I have no doubt he will be an absolutely amazing father.

My own parenting skills are more questionable because how the hell would I even manage a kid with a career as demanding as mine?

Stan and I talked about it early on and decided kids were probably not in my future. Now that I’m older, and a lot more successful, I’m more pragmatic but refuse to rule it out completely. It just makes me nervous. And I can’t even think about that kind of thing for at least another year.

“I’m so freakin’ tired of being pregnant,” Aspen mutters as she comes into the kitchen to throw something away.

“You’ve had a rough time,” Briar says, looking over her shoulder as she loads the dishwasher. “I had a tiny bit of morning sickness in the beginning, but then I was fine until the last couple of weeks when I was just too big to be comfortable.”

“It sounds terrifying,” Jade murmurs, looking decidedly circumspect. “So many changes, both physically and emotionally.”

“I can’t wait to have a baby,” Willow says softly. “I mean, we’re not there yet, and I need to get my career back on track, but when the time is right? I’m all in!”

“What about you, Lily?” Aspen asks me. “Is it hard to think about it because of your career?”

“It is,” I admit. “I think I want a couple, but I’m not sure when or how or…with whom.” I hope they don’t find it insulting that I don't automatically assume this thing with Atlas and me is a done deal.

“You have more to consider than most,” Briar says. “Being on tours that are planned out years in advance complicates things–if I ever wanted another one, I’d have to think about my career and Atlas’s schedule as well. I couldn’t just randomly go on maternity leave.”

“Are you and West talking about babies already?” Jade asks, arching her brows.

Briar’s cheeks turn pink. “Of course not! But we both want them in theory.”

“So…are you going to tell us how he is in bed or are we going to have to hold you down and force it out of you?” Jade demands, hands on her hips.

“Uh, guys…” Aspen says quietly.

“No, it’s only fair,” Jade continues. “I’ve given you the scoop on Royal and me in the bedroom but all I get in return is seeing Briar blush.” She points at me. “Even Lily has dished on Atlas’s skills.”

“It’s not–I–” Briar begins.

“Guys!” Aspen’s voice is quiet but filled with panic and the conversation skids to a halt as she says, “My water just broke.”

There’s a moment of startled silence before Briar whirls and hurries to the doorway. “Banks! We need you in here!”

“You should sit down,” I tell Aspen gently.

Aspen shakes her head. “No… I have to change my clothes. Oh my God!” Her hands fly to her stomach and she doubles over.

“What’s–” Banks comes in and he cuts off mid-sentence the moment he sees his wife. “Babe? What is it?”

“It’s time,” she says, her eyes meeting his.

“Are you sure?”

She nods. “My water just broke.”

“Oh, shit.” He freezes for a second, but Briar is at his side, hand on his arm.

“You have your guys’ bags packed, right?” she asks .

He nods.

“Go home, get the bags, and then head to the hospital. You have a plan. Don't panic.”

“I’m fine,” Aspen says softly, straightening and smiling at her husband. “And so ready to meet our little girl.”

“Right.” Banks reaches for her hand. “We need to go.”

“We’ll meet you there,” Briar says. “No way in hell we’re going to stay home. I just need to find a sitter.” She pulls out her phone.

“Oh, no, don’t do that,” I say quickly. “I’ll stay with Frankie. It would be a cluster fuck if I was recognized anyway, and I don’t want to draw attention away from Aspen and Banks. This is a big day for them. You guys go ahead and–”

“What’s going on?” The rest of the guys come into the kitchen.

“It’s time,” Banks says, pulling his keys out of his pocket.

“I’m going to stay here with Frankie,” I say hurriedly. “If it’s okay with you, Briar.”

“Of course!” She nods. “Let me just explain to her what’s going on.”

“We’ll see you guys at the hospital,” Aspen says. “But give us about an hour because I need a shower.”

Banks starts to protest but she shushes him as they walk out to their SUV.

“I’ll stay with you and Frankie,” Atlas says against my ear. “There’s no need for me to be at the hospital either.”

“Are you sure?” I ask, frowning. “I know how close you all are.”

“We are, but it’s not like I can help Aspen have the baby. I can help you take care of Frankie, though. And you and I don’t have a hell of a lot of time together.”

I smile.

Underneath the gruff exterior and shrewd businessman persona is an incredibly thoughtful and caring man–one I’m starting to have all kinds of feelings for.

Within thirty minutes the house empties and Frankie’s in her pajamas, ready for stories and songs. She has quite a detailed bedtime routine and though Briar warned her not to expect as much from Atlas and me as she does the others, she doesn’t seem willing to let us off the hook.

“Can you sing ‘Poinsettias and Peaches’?” she asks me after Atlas has read her four stories.

That’s a deep track from my Christmas album and I’m startled that she knows it.

“How do you know that one?” I ask, grinning.

“Mommy plays it a lot. She said it reminds her of my daddy.”

I catch the look of surprise on Atlas’s face but he quickly masks it.

“Okay,” I say. “But then it’s bedtime.”

“Okay.” She nestles under the covers, and I clear my throat.

Headin’ down south it’s Christmas time

Decorations on the streets look so sublime

I got memories of you locked up tight

There’s no snow outside, but it’s Christmas time.

Frankie is mesmerized and Atlas seems a little lost in the lyrics as well. Luckily, she falls asleep before the second verse and we slowly slip out of the room.

“Your talent never fails to amaze me,” he says softly, sliding an arm around my waist.

“Thank you. I just can’t believe she knows that song.”

“Not a popular one?”

“It’s from my Christmas album so I rarely perform it. It’s a little sad, about a woman who lost the love of her life, and how hard it is to get through the holidays without him.”

Our eyes meet.

“Briar never told us that Frankie’s father was the love of her life,” he says quietly.

“And there’s probably a reason for that. Don’t get involved, Atlas,” I warn gently. “Respect her boundaries. If you don't, it might blow up in your face.”

“I know,” he mutters. “That’s why I haven’t done anything to find him. But it pisses me off that he left them. I mean, if it didn’t work out with Briar, fine. I get it. Shit happens. But Frankie’s his child. A piece of him! How do you just walk away?”

“Maybe he had no choice. Maybe Briar asked him to. Don’t assume anything. Frankie is happy and healthy–what more does any child need?”

“I guess there’s that.” But he’s scowling.

We sink onto the couch and I let the topic drop. As a woman with secrets of my own, I respect Briar’s privacy. But there’s only so much I can say–Atlas is going to do what he wants.

I relax against him, suddenly tired. “Any word from the hospital?”

“Nothing.” He glances at his watch. “It’s only been three hours. First babies don’t usually come quickly. At least, according to the reading I’ve done.”

“You’ve read up on pregnancy and childbirth?” I ask.

He hesitates. “A little. I guess.”

I chuckle. “It’s not something to be embarrassed about. I think that’s wonderful.” I gaze up at him. “I think you’re wonderful.”

His eyes burn into mine, and I swear I can see into his soul.

Our bond gets stronger every moment we’re together and the time is coming for me to make some big decisions. Like whether or not I can tell him the truth. Bare my soul. Trust him not to throw it in my face or turn his back on me.

“I think that’s the first time anyone’s ever said that to me,” he whispers.

“Then they’re missing out on someone amazing.”

His arms tighten around me, and I lose myself in him–and how safe I feel–as I drift off to sleep.