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CHAPTER FIVE

Rebecca hadn’t slept for more than a few minutes at a time. At first, she lay in bed, silently hoping Harrison would appear to her. That he’d tell her he didn’t wish for her to leave. That perhaps they could have a future together.

She knew she was being a ninny. He was a rake, a notorious one, in fact. She knew what she was doing when she convinced him to take her to his bed.

And, oh, what an experience it had been. If she had known her body could achieve such pleasure, she wasn’t certain she would have waited as long as she had to experience it.

If nothing else, at least Harrison had shown her how she could do certain things to herself. But she knew it wouldn’t be the same. And she knew she’d think of him each and every time she attempted to achieve such pleasure from her own hand.

After a few hours of watching the door, she had hugged her pillow to herself and used it to soak up her tears.

How could she have ever thought that once would be enough?

But she had felt something deeper pass between them, and she thought perhaps he had also felt it.

The realization that she had been mistaken was what had broken her heart.

Even if a broken heart and the knowledge that he’d remain nothing more than a treasured memory were all she had to keep her warm on cold, lonely nights, she wouldn’t change a thing. She’d experience the same torture in order to have him, even for such a short time.

As soon as the sky brightened, she began to wash and dress herself.

She would find Maggie and they would depart.

The sooner she could put distance between her and Harrison, the better.

At least once she left the inn, she would accept her future for what it was.

One without him. One without love or a husband.

Because as foolish as she was, she didn’t want anyone but Harrison. It was mad, and she’d just met him, but no matter what might occur, she believed she had lost her heart to Harrison Sinclair.

She dressed quickly and opened her door and jumped when there was a figure on the other side.

“My lady,” Maggie said, entering the room, “I was just coming to set your clothes out, but it seems you have already dressed.”

“I wish to depart right away. Hurry and pack the rest of my things, and I will venture to the stables and ensure our carriage is readied.”

Maggie eyed her curiously. “But you haven’t broken your fast. And we have plenty of time to reach our destination before nightfall.”

Rebecca drew a deep breath. “It looks like rain is coming,” she replied, which wasn’t a lie. The sky was grey, and the sun wasn’t in sight. “It would be best if we got ahead of the weather.”

Her maid nodded and set about her work, while Rebecca hurried out of the room. She stopped for a moment outside of Harrison’s door, debating if she should go to him. Ask him why he never intended to wed and make him tell her he hadn’t felt something between them.

But what good would that do? Why would she wish to hear him say the words?

At least if she never heard them, she could continue to pretend and dream.

She could allow hope to remain alive. But hearing him scoff at the notion of marrying a plain woman such as herself was just something she knew would only deepen the tear in her heart.

Instead, she continued on, hurrying down the stairs and out to her carriage. Rebecca found that her driver and coachman were feeding the horses and already preparing for their journey.

A half an hour later, her carriage rolled away from the inn. She watched the building through the window as long as she could and then sat back in the squabs, acknowledging to herself that the time she had with Harrison had truly reached its end.

“Is something troubling you, my lady?” Maggie asked. “You don’t seem yourself.”

“I didn’t sleep well,” Rebecca replied. Another truth. “I am going to rest my eyes for a while.”

She closed her eyes and must have dozed off. The next thing she knew, the jerkiness of the carriage jarred her awake. Her eyes darted open and the sound of the pouring rain and thunder were the first things she recognized. Maggie was across from her, gripping the seat.

Rebecca opened her mouth to speak, but the carriage jerked again. It swerved back and forth, throwing her and Maggie around. She hit her head on the side of the carriage and everything went fuzzy.

The carriage tipped to one side, throwing Rebecca against the door, causing her to fall out onto the wet dirt. The last thing she remembered was hearing Maggie scream. Then everything went dark.