Page 11

ELEVEN

WILLOW

EIGHT MONTHS LATER

I’m gasping for breath, trying my hardest to get away, but I can’t. The smell of leather and cigarettes is thick and clogs the air. Storm is relentless. He won’t stop. His fists are meaty and heavy, and no matter how much I beg, it doesn’t make a difference.

"Please," I whimper. "I'm telling the truth. It wasn't me."

The burning agony of the brand searing into my hip has me crying out in pain. It’s too much. All of this is too much.

No one is listening to me. They don’t want to. I haven’t done what they’ve accused me of. Ezra stands in the corner, his face impassive as he watches me suffer.

“Please,” I beg, my entire body hurting. I’m beyond tired.

I close my eyes, hoping like hell that they’ll stop. I hear silence, utter silence. When I open my eyes, I’m frozen in place. Lochlann looms over me, his cold eyes gleaming with cruel intent.

“I think it's time we taught little Willow here a lesson about keeping her mouth shut," he sneers at me. The look of pure malice on his face makes my body shudder with fear.

“Ivy, please!" I plead with my sister, but she does nothing, just stands there and watches as the man she’s dating violates me.

"No!" I scream. "Don't touch me!"

"Willow! Willow, wake up!" A gentle voice cuts through the horror, pulling me back to reality.

I jolt awake with a gasp, my heart racing. For a moment, I'm disoriented, panic gripping me as I try to remember where I am.

It’s just a dream. God, it’s just a dream.

Then I see Natalia's concerned face hovering over me, and the familiar surroundings of her apartment come into focus. I'm safe. I'm in Portland. It was just a nightmare.

"It's okay," Natalia soothes, carefully placing a hand on my arm. "You're safe. It was just a bad dream."

I nod, trying to catch my breath. My nightgown is soaked with sweat, and I can feel my swollen belly tight with tension.

"I'm sorry," I whisper, embarrassed. "I didn't mean to wake you."

Natalia shakes her head. "Don't apologize. That's what friends are for."

Over the past eight months, Natalia has become more than just a friend. She's been my lifeline in this new city. She didn't push when I arrived bruised and broken, just offered a safe place to stay and a listening ear when I was ready to talk.

When she discovered I was pregnant, she was so worried about me. She has been my rock, organizing doctor’s appointments and making sure I’m doing okay. Not to mention, when the nightmares take a hold of me, she’s there through each and every single one of them. She knows how to help me through the panic attacks that grip me so violently they can leave me reeling for days.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Natalia asks gently.

I shake my head, not ready to revisit the horrors of my dream. "No, I'm okay. Thank you though."

Natalia nods, understanding in her eyes. "Alright. Do you want some tea? It might help you relax."

"That would be nice," I say with a small smile.

As Natalia heads to the kitchen, I slowly sit up, placing a hand on my swollen belly. The baby kicks, as if sensing my distress.

"It's okay, little one," I whisper. "We're safe here."

But even as I say the words, I'm not sure I believe them. The nightmares have been getting worse as my due date approaches. The fear of what might happen when the baby comes, of being found by the Saints or Lochlann, haunts me constantly.

Natalia returns with two mugs of chamomile tea. I take a sip as she takes a seat beside me, and I find myself wishing, not for the first time, that I could tell her everything. About the Saints, about Ezra, about what really happened to me in Boston. But I know I can't. The less she knows, the safer she is. I’ve told her a little, though not the name of the motorcycle club as I don’t want her to be pulled into this mess if anything were to happen. She’s been my lifeline, a friend when I desperately needed one. She’s the sweetest angel, and I’m so very lucky to have found her. I never want my past or the pain I’ve been through to taint her.

"Have you thought any more about what you're going to do after the baby comes?" Natalia asks gently.

I sigh, running a hand over my belly. "I don't know," I admit. "Part of me wants to stay here in Portland. You've been so good to me, and I feel safe here. But..."

"But you're worried they might find you," Natalia finishes.

I nod, grateful as always for her understanding. Even without knowing the details, Natalia has always seemed to grasp the gravity of my situation.

"Whatever you decide, I'll support you," she says, squeezing my hand. "You know that, right?"

Tears well in my eyes. "I don't know what I'd do without you, Nat. You've been such a good friend to me."

Natalia smiles. "That's what friends are for. I’ve spoken to my parents and you know how much they adore you, Will. My mom’s been looking at three-bedroom apartments in the area, and they found one. They’ve purchased it, and they want us to move in. It’s totally up to you. We don’t want to pressure you.”

I stare at her, my heart pounding as tears well in my eyes.

My heart races, overwhelmed by her words. "Nat, I... I don't know what to say. That's incredibly generous of your parents, but I can't accept that. It's too much."

Natalia shakes her head, a gentle smile on her face. "It's not too much, Willow. My parents adore you, and they want to help. They know you've been through something terrible, even if they don't know the details. This is their way of giving you and the baby a fresh start."

Tears spill down my cheeks. The kindness of Natalia and her family continues to amaze me. After everything I've been through, to find such genuine care and support feels almost unreal.

"But what about you?" I ask. "You've already done so much for me. I can't ask you to uproot your life too. This is your home."

Natalia takes my hand, squeezing it gently. "You're not asking; I'm offering. Willow, you're my best friend. These past eight months, watching you heal and grow stronger every day... it's been an honor to be part of that journey. And I want to be there for you and this little one," she says, placing her other hand on my belly. “Besides, my dad’s already talking about renting this apartment out. It’ll be fine.”

I close my eyes, feeling the baby kick against Natalia's hand. The thought of raising my child with her support, in a safe home, is tempting. But the fear that's been my constant companion these past months rears its head.

"What if they find us?" I whisper, voicing my deepest fear. "What if I'm putting you and your family in danger by staying?"

Natalia's eyes harden with anger, but I also see fear in them. "Then we'll face it together. Willow, I know what happened to you. I know that it’s affecting your life and that you're scared. But you can't live your life in fear forever. You deserve to be happy, to feel safe. Let us help you build that life."

I take a shaky breath, considering her words. She's right—I can't keep running forever. And the thought of my baby growing up in a loving, supportive environment... it's everything I've dreamed of.

"Okay," I say finally, my voice barely above a whisper. "Okay, let's do it."

Natalia's face lights up with a brilliant smile. She pulls me into a gentle hug, mindful of my belly. "It's going to be okay, Willow. I promise. We're going to give this little one the best life possible."

As I hug her back, I feel a glimmer of hope spark in my chest. For the first time since I left Boston, I allow myself to imagine a future—a happy one. A future where my child is loved and protected, where I can heal and maybe, just maybe, find peace.

I feel a popping inside of me followed by a gush of water spilling between my thighs.

I gasp, my heart racing with fear and excitement. "Nat," I say, my voice trembling, "I think my water just broke."

Natalia pulls back from our hug, her eyes wide with surprise and excitement. "Oh my god! Okay. Don't panic. We've got this."

Despite her words, I feel panic rising in my chest. This is it. The moment I’ve been both anticipating and dreading for months. "It's too early," I whisper, fear lacing my words. "I'm not due for another two weeks."

Natalia squeezes my hand reassuringly. "It's okay. Babies come when they're ready. Let's get you to the hospital."

As Natalia helps me up and starts gathering the hospital bag we prepared weeks ago, I feel a contraction hit, ripping through my stomach. I grip the edge of the couch, breathing through the pain.

"You're doing great," Natalia encourages, rubbing my back. "Just breathe. Remember what we practiced."

I nod, focusing on my breathing just as I was taught to. As the contraction passes, I look at Natalia, tears falling from my eyes. "I'm scared, Nat. What if something goes wrong? What if I can't do this?"

Natalia cups my face gently. "Listen to me. You are the strongest person I know. You've survived so much, and you're going to get through this too. I'll be with you every step of the way."

I nod at her words, hoping she’s right. As we make our way to Natalia's car, another contraction hits, stronger this time.

"It's happening so fast," I gasp.

"That's okay," Natalia assures me, helping me into the car. "We're going to get you to the hospital in no time."

As she drives us through the quiet Portland streets, another contraction rips through me. I’m scared, beyond that. A part of me wishes Ezra was here. Despite everything, a part of me still longs for him at this moment. But that could never happen. The love I had for him died the day he allowed me to be tortured. It died when he didn’t trust me.

"We're almost there," Natalia says, her voice calming despite me being in pain and scared. "You're doing so well, Willow."

She pulls up to the emergency entrance of the hospital. Natalia helps me out of the car and into a wheelchair. Everything seems to be happening so quickly. It’s like a blur as I’m rushed into the maternity ward. I grip Natalia's hand tightly, not wanting to let go.

"Don't leave me," I plead. She’s my best friend, the person I trust above all others. I need her. I feel terrible that I do, but right now, I need her.

"Never," Natalia promises me, squeezing my hand back. "I'm right here with you."

Seven hours later, I'm a mess. My hair is matted to my sweaty head, all my modesty has flown out the window, and I've been through more pain than I ever thought possible. But as the doctor places my newborn daughter on my chest, all of that fades away.

"She's beautiful," I whisper, tears streaming down my face as I look at her tiny, perfect features.

"She's absolutely perfect," Natalia agrees, her own eyes glistening with tears.

As I cradle my daughter close, I'm overwhelmed by a love so fierce it takes my breath away. I never knew I could love someone this much, this instantly.

"Hello, little one," I murmur, tracing her delicate cheek with my finger. "I'm your mama."

The baby blinks up at me with eyes that are startlingly familiar. Ezra's eyes. My heart clenches at the realization, a mixture of love and pain washing over me.

"Have you thought of a name?" Natalia asks gently.

I nod, not taking my eyes off my daughter. "Wren," I say softly. "Her name is Wren."

The spiritual meaning behind the name Wren is determination, enthusiasm, change and happiness. All the things I want my little girl to have. I want her to be everything I couldn’t be.

"It's perfect," Natalia says, smiling. "Welcome to the world, Wren."

As I hold my daughter close, I make a silent promise. No matter what happens, no matter who might come looking for us, I will protect her. I will give her the love and security I never had growing up. And maybe, just maybe, in loving her, I can find a way to heal myself too.

The next two days in the hospital pass in a blur of feedings, diaper changes, and visits from nurses. Natalia stays with me as much as she can, helping me navigate these first overwhelming days of motherhood. I’ve had more than a few breakdowns over the past forty-eight hours. The overwhelming feeling that I’m a failure hits me out of nowhere, and I feel as though I’m doing something wrong. Thankfully, Nat and the nurses have been a huge help to set me straight. Being a mom is going to take time. You learn on the job. And I’m determined to be the best mom to Wren that I can be.

"Are you ready to go home?" Natalia asks with a stuffed wren teddy. I have no idea where she managed to find one, but it’s cute as hell and I know Wren will adore it as she gets older.

I hesitate, looking down at Wren sleeping peacefully in my arms. "I'm nervous," I admit. "What if I can't do this on my own?"

Natalia sits on the edge of the bed, placing a comforting hand on my arm. "You're not on your own, Willow. You have me and my parents ready to help. And you're stronger than you know."

I take a deep breath, nodding. She's right. I've survived so much already. I can do this.

As we leave the hospital, Wren securely fastened in her car seat, I feel a mixture of excitement and fear. This is the beginning of our new life together.

"Ready?" Nat asks softly.

"Ready," I say with a smile, feeling a mixture of nerves and excitement as we head out of the hospital.

The drive to our new apartment is quiet, with Wren sleeping peacefully in her car seat. I can't stop glancing at her, marveling at her tiny features—her little button nose, her rosebud lips. She's perfect in every way.

As we pull up to the apartment building, I feel a flutter of anxiety in my chest. This is it—our new home, our fresh start.

When I went into labor, Natalia’s parents moved quickly and got the apartment ready for us. They must have been working around the clock for the past two days to get it ready. I’m excited to see it. Natalia has been giddy as she’s been describing it to me. She’s like a child at Christmas. She can’t wait for us to move in.

"Welcome home," Natalia says softly as she helps me out of the car.

I carefully lift Wren's car seat, cradling it close as we make our way inside. The apartment is on the second floor, and as Natalia unlocks the door, I take a deep breath as I’m stunned by the apartment. It’s huge, almost triple the size of our previous place.

Stepping inside, I'm overwhelmed by the sight that greets me. The living room is massive and has a large window, and there's a cozy-looking sofa with colorful throw pillows. It looks stunning and I’m so very grateful.

Nat continues to show me around the apartment, and when we get to my room, I’m speechless as I spot the beautiful wooden crib set up beside my bed, with a mobile of stars and moons hanging above it.

"Nat," I whisper, tears welling in my eyes. "Did you do this?"

Natalia smiles, her eyes shining. "My parents and I wanted to surprise you. We thought you and Wren should have a proper welcome home."

I'm speechless, overcome with emotion. After everything I've been through, to have this kind of love and support feels almost unreal.

"Thank you," I manage to say, my voice thick with tears. "I don't know how I'll ever repay you for all of this."

Natalia wraps an arm around my shoulders. "You don't have to repay anything. This is what family does."

Family. The word resonates in my heart. For so long, I've felt alone, cast aside. But here, with Natalia, and now with Wren, I've found a new kind of family.