Page 29

I freaking hate grapes!

I coughed, patting my chest to get the stupid pulp to clear my windpipe. Reaching for my cup, I swigged the hot liquid and swallowed, feeling the lump slowly crawl down my esophagus and finally clearing my airway.

Holy hell. I coughed twice more and took another sip of tea.

“Are you all right?”

“What do you mean I’m not going on the mission?” I demanded, ignoring her question.

Sasha sighed heavily as she rubbed her brow.

“Child, I’m not going to argue with you.

How does this come as a surprise? Nothing has changed since we left the camp.

You were not allowed to go on the missions there because you were too valuable to the rebel cause.

None of that has changed. In fact, you are of greater value now than you were then—”

“Sasha—” I started.

“Do not interrupt me,” she snapped back.

Whoa! I don’t think I had ever seen Sasha lose her temper before, and her sudden outburst shut me up out of pure surprise.

She breathed deeply as she tugged on her shirt to straighten any wrinkles and then sat up taller in her seat.

“Now, you will not be going on this rescue operation. Without you, there is nothing to hold the Calvernon family to their promises. You are the only thing that keeps them in the game and willing to assist this rebellion. Now, I’ve been through this with you multiple times, child, and every time you disobey me and do as you wish. It ends here.”

I snorted. “Fat chance of that.”

Sasha glared. “You will follow orders or I will have you placed under house arrest.”

“ What? ” the word blurted out of my mouth.

“I’m warning you, Mara. I cannot have you in harm’s way. You are to remain at the Calvernon Estate, and you will not go on this mission.”

My temper flared. There was no way in hell I wasn’t going. I didn’t trust Sasha. “I’m going.”

“Don’t push me, child—”

“I’m going ,” I shot back, raising my voice.

“I don’t trust you, Sasha. Since the hospital, everything you’ve ever done has been double-sided.

” I wasn’t blind anymore. All she wanted was power just like everyone else.

And she was using me to do it. But I was tired of being used. I wanted my brother back.

Her eyes narrowed. “That’s quite the insult, and it is not deserved.”

“Oh, come off it, Sasha. The only reason you’ve done anything for me is because I’m your golden ticket back into Telvia. Don’t act like you care about me, or like you actually want to save my brother.”

She held my stare for a moment before she settled back into her chair. “Be that as it may, nothing changes. You should understand the need for me to keep you safe quite clearly. The answer is still no .”

“The answer is going to be yes ,” I said as I leaned forward in my chair. “I don’t trust you. How do I know there’s even an actual operation going on, huh? For all I know, you could just be telling me one fat lie so that I think there’s a mission when there isn’t.”

Sasha’s eyes were calculating, emotions passing through as she pursed her lips. “Very well. I’ll place cameras on the team so you can watch the footage yourself.”

I paused, surprised by the offer. Camera footage would allow me to watch them, see the whole thing for myself.

That was a legit option, but…but what if it was all faked?

My entire life in Telvia was a fake, wasn’t it?

Politicians could be quite deceiving and insanely clever with the lies and stories they told.

What if a team was deployed, but it wasn’t real?

Just a staged operation. Or, what if they did it, saved my brother, and then killed him or something?

No. No, I didn’t trust her. I didn’t trust anyone .

I shook my head. “No. I go. That’s the only way I’m doing this.” I caught her gaze and held it. “I go. I take the lead on the whole thing, and I pick my team. People I trust and I know will be with me on this.”

“That’s absurd. I will not let you go, and even if I did, you lack sufficient experience and training to lead an entire team on an operation like this.”

My fingers balled into fists, nails digging into my palms. “Fine. Then I pick a co-leader.”

“Absolutely not.”

“I’m not arguing with you, Sasha. Those are my demands. I go, I pick my co-leader, and I pick my team. That’s the deal, or I’m not marrying Wes. You lose your golden ticket into Telvia.”

Her eyes widened as her back went ramrod straight. “You’re being unreasonable—”

“You’re not winning this. You force me to stay, you lose your chances of winning Telvia back. The only way you possibly come out winning is if we do this my way.”

The tension was thick, and I watched as Sasha ground her teeth, and the little vein on the side of her head pulsed, looking as though it was about to rupture completely.

“Well?” I pushed, giving her a steely glare, trying my best to channel my inner Wes.

Sasha closed her eyes, steepling her hands and resting her lips against her fingertips.

She took several deep breaths—I presumed to calm herself down.

She and I had already experienced several run-ins like this before, but never in my life had I pushed her so hard that she lost control of herself as much as she did today.

After what felt like an eternity of silence, Sasha finally opened her eyes, calm returning to her aged face. “I will meet your terms, child, but only on one condition.”

“No. My way or—”

“Then you don’t go at all. I will lose my golden ticket, as you say, and find another way of bargaining with the Calvernons.”

Wait, I wasn’t expecting that. “Okay. What’s the condition?”

“I will allow you to pick your team leader, your team, and allow you to go on this mission. But…two of my own operatives will go with you.” I shook my head, but Sasha put her finger up.

“Let me finish. I want you to come back alive, child, as I’m sure you want to as well.

I will meet all of your demands, but I will assign two operatives to act as bodyguards for you.

Your team will focus on the mission and your brother.

My operatives will focus solely on you and ensure that you make it back alive. ”

I played with the idea in my head. I could push it.

I could push this whole thing and demand that it just be me and my team.

But the last thing I needed was to push Sasha over the edge.

As much as I didn’t trust her, I still needed her, and I still needed the North.

If she was serious about finding a different bargaining chip, I was going to lose any hope of saving my brother.

As far as I could tell, this was my only option.

I sighed heavily, and then nodded. “Fine. You have a deal. My team, your operatives, and I go.”

We stared each other down. Her gaze was intense, but I refused to give in. And I was willing to bet that my own glare mirrored every ounce of unyielding frustration that simmered in hers. Finally, Sasha nodded. “Done. You’ll meet with the Sergeant Major tomorrow to discuss mission parameters.”

I nodded. Well, here we go again.

***

How the hell was I going to lead a team?

I didn’t know the first thing about designing a mission like this.

The Admin Job was one thing. I knew Telvia, had walked the halls of the Administration Buildings a thousand times as a little girl, knew the city like the back of my hand.

But even that mission I wasn’t really in control of.

I wasn’t the lead. When Wes volunteered, plenty of commanding officers pitched in to help us and Wes naturally took over.

He had the experience, knew what to do when I didn’t.

Knew what to ask for and who to ask when I was confused and stuck.

But I couldn’t ask him to go this time. Not when I was planning on slipping out in the night with my brother, leaving the team behind. And that brought up another thought…

How could I ask anyone to follow me into this massive death trap, only to ditch them? How could I demand to lead a team, to sacrifice a group of people, for my own selfish reasons?

I leaned back in my seat in the limo, my inner demons toiling inside of me.

I couldn’t come back to the North. But asking people to risk themselves for me, only to abandon them, was such a douchey move.

God, this sucked. And, let’s not forget that Sasha was sending two of her own operatives with me.

How was I going to escape them? Their job was to watch me like a hawk, to ensure my survival at all costs.

I covered my face with my hands. This was such a mess.

My power play with Sasha had put me in a total bind.

I needed help. I couldn’t plan this whole thing alone.

I had to figure out a way to untangle myself from this, to get what I needed from the rebels while simultaneously not leaving everyone out to dry.

I groaned and dropped my hands, rubbing my lips together as I mulled it over in my head.

I had to pick a team this week. That was the first step. Then I would figure out the rest.

Bing, bing.

I looked at my wrist, watching my tab light up. I tapped the screen to see my message.

Edith: Hey, newbie! Haven’t heard from you in a while. Busy using the special stuff I left for you, eh?

My cheeks flushed with raging heat as my memory pulled up lacy intimates that, in no way, could ever be considered as actual clothing when a sock contained more fabric. I shook my head, trying to get the image out of my mind, and then quickly messaged back.

Mara: First of all, you need to find me a new nickname, because I think I hardly qualify as a newb anymore.

Secondly, thanks for all the clothes. And thirdly, you better take all that stuff in that sex drawer back!

If Wes’s mom sees that stuff, she’s going to think I’m a total harlot and hate me more than she already does!

Edith: ROTFL! Oh, you’re still a newbie all right. But that’s okay, I’ll show you how to wear it all.

Mara: Absolutely not!

Edith: Oh you’re no fun anymore, girly. If you’re seriously not going to make use of them, then send it my way. I’ve got some ideas…

“Oh my gosh, Edith,” I mumbled aloud. Warmth flushed within me as I imagined Edith dressed up in some of the extra special underwear and bras from my extra special drawer. My tab binged again.

Edith: Have you been into town yet?

Mara: I’ve driven through it.

Edith: Busy?

Was I busy? Technically, yes. I was completely overwhelmed with a task I’d just arm-wrestled Sasha into. And, at the moment, had no clue how to approach it, tackle it, or remotely solve it. I was very busy.

Mara: Nope. Not busy. Why?

Edith: Goodie! Let’s go out for ice cream. Meet me at The Creamery in an hour?

I really didn’t know what ice cream was.

I’d never even heard of it. But meeting with Edith sounded like an amazing way to avoid my problems right now.

And besides, maybe she could help me come up with a plan or knew someone I could talk to that could help me figure some of this out.

Of course, I couldn’t tell her the whole story—she’d be so pissed.

But I could at least get help with the mission part, right?

Mara: Absolutely!

I crawled forward through the limo and tapped on the divider. It slid down, revealing Roger on the other side.

“Yes, miss?”

“Can we go to The Creamery in town?”

“Of course.”

“Thanks!” I chirped out, flopping back into my seat. Yes. This was good. This was very good. After the drama of the last thirty hours, girl time was exactly what I needed. A break from it all and a chance to forget, if only for an hour.

I sighed. If only everything were this easy.