Page 22

CHAPTER 22

March 9 th

5:13 A.M.

The sound that came from Nathaniel as he lunged for the surgeon was nothing Ava had ever heard come from a person before.

In fact, it was more animal than human.

But the rage in his eyes was focused and precise.

He knew what he was doing and from the looks of things, his goal was to tear apart these men and women limb from limb.

Part of her wanted to let him do it, to make no move to stop it, but part of her wasn't sure that Nathaniel wouldn't regret his decision when he came down from the fury that had consumed him.

Then again, he didn't look like he was going to have regrets.

More men filled the room.

Rocco, Rex, Bubba, Ace, Gumby, and Phantom.

They’d all come for her. Somehow managing to actually beat the odds and find her. It was a miracle for sure. How else could you possibly describe it?

She’d been a dead woman walking and now she was going to live.

For a moment, the pain consuming her body dimmed, and when she caught movement out of the corner of her eye, from the side of the bed where the remaining medical personnel had fled when Nathaniel took down the surgeon, not the side where the SEAL team were standing, their weapons pointed at the doctors and nurses, she screamed a warning.

“I think they have a gun!”

Her words added to the pandemonium.

One of the nurses lifted a weapon and began firing.

Only not at the SEALs, not even at Nathaniel, who was beating the surgeon to death with his bare hands from what Ava could see from her position on the bed.

Each bullet she fired was at her colleagues.

After the first one dropped, the others screamed as they looked for an escape. But they were trapped between the nurse with the gun and the SEALs who were also armed. There was nowhere for them to go.

“We won't be taken alive,” the nurse screeched as she managed to shoot three of her colleagues before one of the SEALs—she wasn't sure which because her gaze kept darting between the nurse and Nathaniel—put a bullet between her eyes.

Had the shots been kill shots?

Were they all dead now?

There was no way Nathaniel hadn't already killed the surgeon even if his fists kept slamming into the man’s head over and over again. The nurse was dead, too, these SEALs knew how to eliminate a threat. Three of the other four personnel had been shot, and she had to assume that the nurse also knew what she was doing, and she’d aimed to kill. That still left one alive, one who might be able to give them the intel they needed to end this once and for all.

Until the ring was dismantled, she was never going to be safe.

They could keep coming back for her time and time again.

With the tracking implant somewhere in her body they could find her again. And even if it was removed that didn't mean she was safe. They knew where she lived, probably had contacts everywhere who could track her.

Panic clawed at her chest.

Like an angry cat wanting to tear its way out.

She wanted the tracking implant out.

Now.

Needed it out.

With a pained cry she thrashed on the bed.

Needed to get to that scalpel that the surgeon had dropped. It lay on the mattress so close to her hand. If she could just grab hold of it then she could get free. Once she was free, she could start cutting her skin. Sooner or later, she’d find the tracking device and pry it free.

Had to.

Had to get it out.

Couldn’t stand it being inside her for a single second longer.

Vaguely, she was aware of hands trying to hold her still, of voices trying to calm her down.

But they had the opposite effect.

They only made her panic more.

Didn't they understand? She wasn't safe. She wanted to be safe. Couldn’t be safe until she got the tracking device out of her.

“Nathaniel,” someone called out. “Get over here. She needs you.”

Hearing that she needed him must have cleared the haze of anger clouding Nathaniel’s mind because the next thing she knew, his hands were framing her face. The warmth of his palms pressed to her cheeks seeped into her, and his thumbs brushed lightly across her cheekbones, soothing a little of the panic.

“I’m here, honey. I'm here. They’re not going to hurt you again. You're okay, we’re going to get you to the hospital and patch you up. You're okay, you're going to be okay.”

His words, while meant to soothe, didn't solve her problem.

With a sob she shook her head. “Not okay.”

“They cut you, honey, and it looks deep, but you're not going to bleed out, I swear.”

Wasn't what she was worried about. “Not okay,” she whispered again.

“You are, honey. I'm here now, and I will kill anyone who even looks at you wrong.”

Somehow she believed that. And the thought—macabre though it was—made her smile. “Tracking device. In me,” she told him as her body trembled violently. Whether it was from fear, shock, or pain, Ava wasn't quite sure. Maybe it was all three of them.

Nathaniel swore, but his hands never left her face, his thumbs never stopped caressing her skin. “Okay, honey, we’ll get it out at the hospital. Unless you know where it is?”

When she shook her head, he offered her a smile and leaned down to touch a kiss to her forehead. His lips lingered there, and she felt a shudder ripple through his large body. He hadn't just been angry she’d been taken again and hurt, he’d been terrified of the possibility of losing her.

“I’m going to untie you now, okay, honey? But I need you to stop thrashing about, because you're making your wounds worse. I know you're hurting, and I know you're scared. I get that you want that tracker out of you right this second, but we can't do that, okay?”

Lifting his head just enough that he could meet her gaze, he searched it, and Ava did her best to stifle the panic still pulsing inside her. Logically, she got what he was saying. They couldn’t take the tracker out until they knew where it was, and she couldn’t actually just start randomly slashing at her skin in the hopes she’d find it.

But that didn't stop her wanting it out right now.

Obviously satisfied she’d calmed enough, Nathaniel let go of her and she mewed a protest before she even registered it.

“Not going anywhere,” he assured her as he made quick work of untying the bonds at her wrists and ankles. “Not ever again.”

A seriousness to his tone warmed her. They had a lot to talk about. Ava had no intention of being Nathaniel’s emotional punching bag or having to deal with his hot and cold behavior indefinitely. It wasn't okay to treat her like that, she’d worked hard to figure out who she was and become that woman and she wasn't going to change into someone she wasn't, not even for Nathaniel.

Once things calmed down, she absolutely intended to tell him off, then she’d hear him out, and they could talk things through. But for now, the feel of his warm hands on her body, and his steady presence at her side calmed her in a way nothing else could.

Rex appeared behind Nathaniel, a blanket in his hands. “It safe to come closer?” he teased.

Offering up a smile she nodded. “Yeah, I don’t think I'm going to be delivering any blows today.”

“You did amazing, just like we all knew you would,” Rex said as he kept a little distance between them, obviously sensing she was still balancing precariously on the edge and could lose control at any second.

Draping the blanket over her, Nathaniel then took a wad of bandages from Rex’s hand and slipped them under the blanket.

When he pressed them hard against her wounds, Ava cried out, her body arching off the bed as she tried to escape the pain. Only of course that was impossible. The pain was inside her and it wasn't going anywhere anytime soon.

“I’m going to unhook this IV and set up my own, is that okay, Ava?” Rex asked as he held up the kit.

Eyeing it suspiciously even though she knew these men were safe and would never hurt her, she fought against her terror and gave a sharp nod.

“It’s fluids, pain relief, antibiotics, and a sedative,” Rex told her as he rounded the bed and unhooked the IV that was currently delivering the muscle relaxants and whatever else these people had been pumping into her system.

The sedative part made her tremble in fear. She didn't want to be unconscious. Couldn’t quite get out of her mind the idea that as soon as she went to sleep, she would never wake up again.

That wasn't going to happen now that she’d been rescued, she knew that, but she didn't know it. Not that that made the slightest bit of sense.

“I’m going to be right with you the whole time,” Nathaniel assured her. “I won't leave your side not even for a second. Doesn’t matter what happens, I learned my lesson already, and I hate to inform you, honey, but you are now stuck with me for the rest of your life.”

The words made her chuckle, and she smiled at him. “I kind of like that.”

Relief filled his dark eyes. “Good. I'm glad to hear that, because it’s true.”

Rex must have started the IV because Ava started to feel sleepy. She struggled to keep her eyes open, wanting to maintain this connection to Nathaniel, and still afraid that once she gave in and passed out that was it, her life would be over.

“Right here, honey, stop fighting it. Sleep now, Aves, I’ll be right by your side when you wake up.”

Clinging to those words, and the solid promise in them, she let the drugs do their job and drag her into unconsciousness.

* * *

March 9 th

11:27 P.M.

Nathaniel would be quite content to make this his new full-time job.

Sitting watching Ava sleep filled him with a tranquility he’d never experienced before. There was something about the way her chest rose evenly with each breath she took, that settled him. In sleep she looked so peaceful, like she didn't have the weight of a horrible ordeal weighing heavily on her shoulders.

Not even the fact that they were in the hospital could ruin this moment.

Somehow, the soft beeps of the machines standing guard around Ava’s bed only added to the peacefulness of the whole picture.

Maybe it really had more to do with the fact that Ava was alive, and mostly unharmed considering what could have happened to her. They had arrived quite literally in the nick of time. If they’d been any later, Ava would have lost another organ. Much later than that and she would have already been dead.

But she wasn't.

She was there.

Her chest rising and falling with easy breaths, the wounds on her abdomen had been closed, she was being given enough painkillers to sleep easily, and she wanted him close.

That in itself would be enough to have Nathaniel feeling like he was floating on cloud nine. Even after he’d messed up so horribly, she was still able to find comfort and reassurance in his presence.

A miracle.

The entire day had been filled with them.

After Ava had passed out at the clinic in Mexico, they’d hopped on board a helo, flown back across the border, then immediately hopped on a flight back to New York. They’d come straight to the hospital and while Ava was in surgery he did exactly as he promised and stuck by her side. The doctors hadn't been thrilled having him hovering in a corner of the operating room, but he’d already let Ava down more than once and he had no intention of breaking his promise.

His own wounds had been checked, a few stitches had pulled when he’d been beating the surgeon to death, but they were restitched now, he’d been given pain medicine, and he was perfectly content just sitting there with his girl.

A soft moan came from the bed, and immediately he shifted closer, pushing out of his chair and perching on the edge of the mattress. His fingers continued to hold her hand, while with his other he palmed her cheek, wanting her to know from the second she regained consciousness that she was no longer in that hellhole.

“Hey, honey,” he crooned as her eyelashes fluttered on her cheeks. “You're safe, you're in the hospital, and I'm right here with you.”

“Nathaniel,” she murmured his name, then licked her lips like they were dry.

“Yeah, Aves. I'm here, I never left. Here, drink a little water.” Reaching for the cup on the table, he held the straw to her lips as she took a few sips. “Not too much, don’t want to make yourself sick.”

“We’re really at the hospital?” she asked, her eyes opening slowly like they were weighed down with lead.

“At the hospital.”

“The one where they tried to …” she trailed off obviously not wanting to finish that sentence.

“No. A different hospital,” he assured her.

“And the tracking device? Is it gone?” Fine tremors began to ripple through her body, and he knew that was her biggest fear right now. He couldn’t imagine how it felt to be tagged and know that the people who were after you could so easily track you.

“It’s gone. First thing the doctors did after examining you when we got here.”

“Where was it?”

“Right at the back of your left shoulder. Tiny little cut, too small to be noticeable. Especially since when I first found you there was a much more obvious injury to deal with.”

“So it’s really gone?”

“Really gone.”

“They can't track me with it anymore.”

“No, they can't. Prey took it in to see if it was a potential lead, but it’s no longer a threat to you.”

“And you … you stayed with me the whole time?” There was a vulnerability in her eyes as she asked the question, along with a bit of conflict. Maybe she didn't like that he made her feel safe and she craved his presence given how things had been the last time he saw her before she was abducted.

“I promised you I would stay by your side, and I had no intention of breaking that promise,” he told her firmly.

“You said I was stuck with you for the rest of my life.”

“And you said you kind of liked that.” Thankfully. Because she had every right to never want to see him again.

“How you’ve been treating me, you know that’s not okay, right? I deserve better than that. I get that you have issues, and what you lived through as a child was terrible. Awful. I hate that it happened to you. But that doesn’t mean it’s okay to run hot and cold with me, and to punish me for things I never even did. I'm not stuffy and pretentious like my parents. I don’t judge people based on their financial status. And while I make good money working for Prey, I am not rich. Not in the least. Most of what I earn I scrimp on everything else so I can save up and add to my art collection. I sacrifice other things to buy the things that make me happy. And that bracelet you freaked out about was my grandmother’s. There is no way I can afford jewelry worth fifty thousand dollars.”

Dragging his fingers through his hair, he looked down at her, feeling so much regret it was like he was drowning in it. “Chelsea and Teresa told me about the bracelet. I'm so sorry, Ava, I let my insecurities get the best of me.”

“I appreciate the apology, and I even accept it, because I understand that you have childhood trauma you’ve yet to deal with. But that doesn’t make it okay to treat me that way, and I don’t think an apology is enough for me to give us another chance.” She softened her words a little by offering him a small smile, but it still felt like the bottom of his world had dropped out, leaving him plummeting down into a pit of nothingness.

Reaching out again, he picked up her hand, grateful she didn't pull it away. Entwining their fingers he stared at them for a moment before resolutely meeting her gaze once more. “I'm not offering only an apology. While I was sitting in my car outside your building, I realized how badly I messed up, and I didn't want to keep messing up. To keep hurting you. I’d already decided that I needed professional help.”

“You did?”

“Of course. I hurt you.” Somewhat tentatively, he lifted the hand not holding hers and once again palmed her cheek. His fingers caressed her soft skin like he could never get enough of it, and he couldn’t. He wanted to be able to do this for the rest of his life.

But to make that a reality he had to prove to Ava that he’d learned his lesson.

That he was serious about changing.

“I didn't mean to, and I hate that I did. I'm so sorry for allowing your parents’ judgmental attitudes to affect me like that. My biggest fear is not being good enough for you, that my past, my DNA, will somehow rub off on you and wind up hurting you.”

“You're not your dad, Nathaniel. Nor are you your mom. You don’t hurt people, and you don’t stand by and let others get hurt. You're a good man, a brave one, a strong one, a smart one, one that any woman would be lucky to have. One that I would be lucky to have.”

“I want to believe that so badly.”

Turning her face, she nuzzled into his hand and then touched a kiss to the inside of his wrist. “You will. One day you will. But you have to stop seeing me as this unattainable, rich princess. I'm not that woman. I fought hard to get out of my parents’ clutches and become who I wanted to be. I can't change who I am. I won't. Not for anyone. But if you paint this picture of me that’s not true then sooner or later, you're going to wind up being disappointed that I'm not who you think I am.”

“Who you are is perfection, peace, and happiness in a way I didn't know existed.”

Ava blushed, a small smile curling her lips up. “I'm not perfect, Nathaniel.”

“You are to me,” he said simply.

And that was when it clicked. When it finally all sank in.

Nobody was perfect, everybody was dealing with their own issues, some bigger some smaller, but life wasn't a competition, and he didn't need to prove anything to anyone other than himself and this woman.

For Ava he wanted to be a better man, but he wanted to be a better man for himself as well. Instead of hiding from his past and using it as a shield so he didn't have to really live, he wanted to rid himself of those demons, so that he could be perfect to Ava.

“I'm going to work through my issues, Aves, I won't let them hurt you again. It might take me some time, but I’ll get there. I’ll be a man you look at and think he’s perfect for me.”

Pressing another kiss to the inside of his wrist, she shot him one of those brilliant smiles. “I already think that, Nathaniel. Now I think it’s time you kissed me.”

A weight fell off his shoulders as he leaned in and captured Ava’s lips. His past would always be there, always be part of him, but it no longer loomed over him, it had taken a step backward. So long as he focused on the future, he’d never let this beautiful, brave woman down again.

“Best thing I ever unwrapped,” he whispered against her lips.