Page 27 of Rescuing Micah (Prey Security: Cyber Team #3)

Her mind was blown.

Teresa still couldn’t really believe she’d heard Micah say what she knew she’d heard him say.

He was still in love with her?

When he’d said he loved her as she was being rolled away to be operated on against her will, she’d thought that was his fear talking, not that he really did still love her.

The apologies he’d given, and his claims that he wanted to make it up to her, she’d assumed he was being primarily motivated by guilt. After all, it had been twelve years since their lives together imploded. What else would she think?

Sure, he’d talked about wanting to earn her forgiveness and wanting a place in her life, but again, she had assumed he’d meant friendship.

Possibly she would stretch so far as to believe that he wanted to recreate a time in their lives where they’d both been young and happy, now he knew he was the one who had ruined what they shared and not her.

But it was more than that.

Deeper than that.

He still loved her.

Actually loved her. Not just saying it out of fear.

Did that change things?

Did it matter?

Love couldn’t go back and fix what was done in the past, make it so that it never happened, but it could change her future if that was what she wanted.

The ball was in her court, Teresa was well aware of that.

Micah wanted what she now realized was a second chance at a romantic relationship, not just a friendship born of guilt and shame.

While he wanted that, he wasn't going to push for it. He knew that what he’d done had possibly ruined things beyond repair.

So it was up to her to decide which path they walked down.

And whether they walked down it alone or together.

There was only one way she could even begin to make a decision about that.

“We need to talk,” she announced the second Micah locked her apartment door behind them.

They’d spoken with the cops, her brother had been arrested, the officer who had cuffed him had assured her that he would be serving time, and not getting bounced right back out.

She hoped that was true, but even if it wasn't, she’d seen the look on Simon’s face as he was loaded into the back of the police car, clearly in agony, and it was one she recognized.

It was the same look of terror she’d walked around wearing for months after the assault.

Whatever Micah had done to him seemed to have worked, and she could only hope he was forever scared away from her.

A lingering part of her still loved the little brother she’d known when they were small, but mostly she just wanted to keep him out of her life and heal as best she could from the trauma he’d inflicted on her.

“First, ice for your arm.” Micah took her hand, and she found his was trembling as he led her over to the couch.

With extreme gentleness, he eased her into it, his hand clasping one of her ankles, and he tugged off her shoe, repeating the process with her other foot.

Then, grasping both ankles and carefully lifting them, he turned her as he did so that she was sitting with her legs up.

Finally, he tucked the blanket in around her and disappeared into the kitchen.

Returning with an icepack, he placed it on her lap, took her hand, and settled her arm so that the bruises on her forearm rested on the cold. It was pretty much a guarantee that she would wind up with some bruises, but they weren't the life-threatening injury Micah was treating them as.

“Second, I need to do this.” His dark eyes were tormented as he stood before her for a moment before he dropped to his knees.

Her mouth fell open in shock, and she was about to ask him what he was doing when he leaned in and wrapped his arms around her waist, burying his face against her neck.

Were those … tears … she felt on her skin?

“I am so sorry for leaving you, pretty girl,” he whispered, his voice hoarse.

The thing was, she actually believed him.

Not something Teresa ever thought would happen. But Micah seemed completely sincere in his apologies. Plus, he had no reason to keep offering them. Sure, he’d messed up, but a lot of time had passed, and he could have just said sorry, then packed his bags and gone back home.

He was sticking around for her.

Because he really did want a second chance.

Never would she have thought she would get to this place, but it felt right.

Actually, it felt like a weight was lifting off her shoulders.

It wasn't until right this very second that Teresa even realized she’d given herself a second burden to bear.

Instead of forgiving Micah a long time ago, for her own sake, not his, and allowing herself the freedom to move forward, she’d clung to her righteous anger because she absolutely did have reason to hate him for his abandonment.

But she didn't want to.

It was time.

“I forgive you,” she whispered, feeling her throat begin to clog with emotion.

Micah’s head whipped up, his eyes and mouth wide with shock. “Wh-what did you just say?”

“I forgive you for leaving. That doesn’t mean what you did didn't devastate me, and it doesn’t mean that it doesn’t still hurt. It also doesn’t mean that I know where to go after this. Did you mean it?”

“When I said I loved you?”

Her nod was shaky as she waited for his answer. Whatever it was she knew forgiving him was the right thing to do for herself.

“I meant it with every fiber of my being. For a long time, I hated you for betraying me, I tried to get you out of my head, but I could never let another woman get close to me. I told myself it was because you ruined my ability to trust, but I was wrong. It was because my heart was already yours, and I could never take it back. It kills me knowing the truth now, knowing what I did to you, how badly I?—”

“Shh,” she murmured, touching a finger to his lips. “You apologized a million times already, and I said I accept.”

His lips moved so he could touch a kiss to her fingertip.

“Pretty girl, I’m telling you here and now if you let me stay in your life in any sort of capacity, I will be telling you every day for the rest of my life how sorry I am.

Scratch that, I have your phone number, I’ll text you an apology even if you don’t let me stay in your life.

And if you change your number, I’ll apologize through Nathaniel for as long as I live. ”

“That’s really what you want? To be part of my life again?”

“More than anything.”

“Even if it’s only as friends?” Forgiving and dating again were not the same thing, and she honestly couldn’t say she knew what she wanted right now.

Too much had happened these last few days with seeing Micah again, then the abduction, the surgery, and now with her brother.

It was a lot, and she couldn’t process it quickly enough to make lifelong decisions.

“I won't lie, I want you back, I want to make all our teenage dreams a reality, but I truly understand that ship might have sailed. I’ll take back in your life any way I can get.”

“You said you haven’t let women get close to you, but according to Nathaniel, you're a bit of a player.” That might be a problem given that sex for her was not a fun experience. Pretty standard, she thought, given that her first experience had been horrific.

If she’d had Micah by her side, she might have been able to work through those issues, but she hadn't so she’d had to stumble her way through them on her own.

She could make herself come on her own, but when she was with a guy, she usually wound up panicking and getting out of the moment.

Which was why there hadn't been many guys.

“Much as I’d like to tell you there were none, there were quite a few.

I was a stupid nineteen-year-old kid who panicked and took the coward’s way out when he thought his girl cheated on him.

Then I was stubborn and held onto that anger and pain instead of doing the mature, grown-up thing and confronting you.

A million wishes—and believe me, I have them —can't change that. Have there …” Micah trailed off and audibly swallowed. “Have there been many men for you?”

“Well, you already know that back then, unlike you, I was still a virgin, and I was waiting for my eighteenth birthday for us to sleep together for the first time. I was trying to be all responsible, not risk a pregnancy when I already had a lot on my plate. Those first few months, I wished so hard I had thrown caution to the wind for once in my life and done it. Since then, there have been a couple of guys but no relationships.”

Did she leave it there or tell him everything?

It would be trusting him with a part of herself that she hadn't shared with anyone else, not her mom, not Ava or Chelsea.

Regardless of what the future held for them, there was one thing Micah could do for her now that might change her life.

Dragging in a deep breath, she held it and then jumped off the deep end. “Sex was kind of ruined for me thanks to what happened. I don’t know what I can promise you for the future, but do you think you could help me learn to like it?”

May 5 th

1:54 P.M.

“Can I help you with what?”

The question exploded out of him without any sort of thought on his part, but when he watched as Teresa’s gaze slipped away, and her cheeks flushed a deeper shade of pink, it was clear she had misinterpreted what he was saying.

It was obvious she was conflicted about what their future held, and he could hardly hold that against her.

Not only had he not been there for her twelve years ago, but he had popped back up in her life at absolutely the worst possible time when she already had so much to deal with.

There was no way her mind could settle enough to focus forward when her present was so full of turmoil.

But she’d reached out to him.

Asked him for help.