Page 3 of Rejected Nanny Mate (Crystal Creek Wolves #3)

I started looking forward to my shifts not because I enjoyed the job, but because it was another opportunity to see Joe.

If that had been it, then it'd be easy to say that I'd just had a stupid crush, but Joe kept pushing things farther and farther.

It had started with him showing up more often, and then he had asked if he could take me out after a particularly difficult shift.

I'd turned him down, feeling awkward and self-conscious, and that was the start of a trend.

He would ask, and I would turn him down, but every time, it seemed like he was just a little bit more charming.

“Why not?” He would tease, smiling down at me. “You know I won't bite.”

“Not yet,” I'd joke, blushing, and his smile would widen. Something about Joe had made me feel impossibly brave, and flirting with him wasn't nearly as intimidating as I had expected it to be.

I wasn't exactly an outcast, but I'd always been awkward and socially inept.

I preferred to stay home rather than go on pack runs and hunts, and that, coupled with my anxiety, had made it so I was left behind by my peers and pretty much forgotten amongst the pack.

People would be surprised to see me at the coffee shop, and it was clear they had forgotten I existed.

It was fine...except, not really. Part of me wanted to be left alone, but the other part was still sad that no one had made an effort to include me in less intense activities that I might have actually enjoyed.

But I understood. I'd had my first anxiety attack during a pack hunt, when the energy and violence had just been too much, and ever since then, my pack mates avoided me like the plague. No one wanted weird, introverted Gwen ruining the mood.

No one in my pack, at least. Joe Longwood was a different story.

When it became clear that I wasn't going to give in to his normal flirtations, Joe changed.

He didn't pursue me like someone he wanted to conquer, but instead, he became my friend.

Joe would be there to walk me home after my shift, or he would bring me lunch when I complained about how sick I was of the cafe's food.

He listened to my interests, asked questions about my degree, and what my eventual dream job might be.

We talked about music, books, and movies, and the longer I let myself talk with him, the more I wanted to let him into my world.

Then, finally, the day came.

He walked me home, like usual, but he didn't leave. Instead, we lingered on the steps outside the door, and he brushed a stray hair off my cheek.

“I'm warning you right now, Gwen. I'm going to kiss you.”

“Yes,” the answer slipped out before I had time to think, and the next thing I knew, his lips were against mine.

It wasn't a hard, demanding kiss or anything that screamed sex.

Instead, it was a soft, slow brush of his lips against mine.

The barest hint of pressure, and his hands gently cupping my face, his fingertips stroking the soft skin under my ear.

And then he pulled away.

I was dizzy, and I couldn't think, couldn't breathe. Joe was staring down at me, watching, and he was smiling.

“What...” I licked my lips. “What was that?”

“A kiss,” his voice was husky, low. “Gwen, can I come inside?”

The thought was intoxicating, and I wanted the answer to be yes so badly, but I needed time to think. My chest felt tight, my thoughts racing as fast as my heart. “Not...not this time. Later. Maybe.”

Joe laughed. “You're so cute.”

I wasn't sure if that was a compliment or not, but I didn't argue. He was the only person in the world who made me feel that way, and I liked the butterflies and the heat that bloomed low in my belly whenever he looked at me.

Joe left that night after giving me another, quicker peck on the lips that had me wanting more despite myself.

That night, I tossed and turned, my body hot but my heart feeling like it was going to beat out of my chest. I'd never been in a real relationship before, my only other interactions with guys having happened during my short stint in college, but Joe made me feel things I'd never imagined feeling before.

That night, I convinced myself that I was in love with him. When he came into the coffee shop the next day, right on time, I clocked out on a break and dragged him behind the shop to tell him exactly how I felt before I lost my nerve.

“Joe, I want you to know—”

“You should come over tonight.”

His words made me stumble, and a nervous, fluttery giggle fell from my lips. “I, um. Well, yeah. Sure. Actually, that's what I wanted to talk about. So, you know, you don't need to invite me. Because I already feel the same way, and—”

“Gwen,” Joe stepped closer, and a blush crawled up my neck and cheeks. He was so close. I could feel the heat radiating off of him. “Are you okay?”

“Yes. Why wouldn't I be?”

“Because,” he said, “You're rambling. What is it?'

“I love you,” I told him simply, buzzing with adrenaline. I wasn't surprised at the shock that had rolled across his face, but what did surprise me was the way he stepped back from me immediately.

“Whoa, hold up,” he put his hands up as though trying to push the words away. “Where did that come from? That's not funny, Gwen.”

“What?” I was shocked. “It's not a joke. Why would it be a joke?”

“I can think of plenty of reasons.” His voice was flat, cold, and a chill swept through my veins.

“I'm not lying,” I was pleading with him now, tears blurring the edges of my vision. “I've been wanting to tell you for a while now, and last night, you know, the kiss...that was amazing. And I just thought that you would—”

He laughed, but it was cruel. “I'm not here for a relationship, Gwen. Or for love, or anything like that.”

The air rushed out of my lungs. “What do you mean?”

For a second, he had looked unsure, but then he shrugged, shoving his hands into the pockets of his jeans. “I just thought we were having fun.”

“Well, yes, we were,” I said, the tears spilling over.

“It's not going to get serious, okay? That's not something I'm interested in.”

“What were you interested in?” I cried.

“This,” he motioned to the space between us. “It was just some fun.”

“That's it?” I whispered, and when Joe nodded, my heart sank.

“That's it,” he said, and the finality of the statement made me feel like I was dying.

I managed to not reach out for him when he turned and walked away, but just barely. When I'd gone back inside, I'd told Scott I was sick and needed to go home for the day, and spent the rest of the night crying my eyes out on my sofa.

I'd been so stupid. So naive. And I'd just accidentally accepted a position that would have me living with the man I thought I loved, who'd rejected me like I was nothing, and I had no way out of it.

I pressed my hand to my chest, feeling that unwelcome but familiar tightness starting to build.

Kiera noticed and jumped up to get me a glass of water while I tried to breathe through the anxiety before it became too overwhelming.

To Kiera's credit, she didn't ask me any other questions about Joe or the nannying job, but just rubbed my back while I sipped at the cold water and breathed slowly.

“It's gonna be okay,” she murmured. “Do you want to talk about it?”

“Not really,” I mumbled. “Not now, at least. I... I just can't do it, okay? Joe is going to have to find someone else.”

“Gwen...”

When I was sure I wasn't about to crumble into pieces, I stood and grabbed my things. “I have to go. I'll call you tonight or tomorrow, I promise. I just need some time alone.”

Kiera's blue eyes were bright with worry, and I had to look away before I started crying again. “If you're sure. Are you okay to drive?”

“Yes,” I said, nodding quickly. “I'm fine. Promise. Just...tell Joe I'm sorry.”

I left Kiera's place, feeling both better and worse.

I was relieved she wasn't going to push the issue, but not as thrilled about her news.

Joe Longwood had a daughter. A baby. I felt a wave of sadness at the thought.

At one time, I was sure we'd be together, and maybe have a family, but he'd gone and had a baby with someone else.

I knew it was foolish to feel sad about it, but I couldn't help myself.

It was impossible to wrap my mind around, even though I'd had an entire afternoon to try and process it.

Joe wasn't a family guy. He was a bachelor and not the type to settle down.

In fact, if anyone had asked me if Joe would ever have a kid, I would have laughed in their face.

Just like Joe had laughed in mine when I confessed that I loved him.

That's probably why, I realized. This was just another way he was going to laugh at me. Oh, look at silly Gwen, sad because her fantasies were well and truly squashed now.

When the tears started flowing again, I decided I'd had enough for the day.

There was no use in dwelling on the past, and besides, now that I knew what was happening, I was sure I'd find a way out of it.

Kiera and Joe would have to find someone else, and if they didn't, well, that wasn't my problem.

It figured that as soon as I found my place in the Saltfang pack, part of the trio with Kiera and Nayeli, something would pop up to drive me away.

I had a cousin who lived in South Carolina, and while I hadn't seen her in years, maybe it was time for me to take an impromptu vacation.

By the time I returned, Joe would have found his new nanny, and I'd be free to just exist again, not having to think about the Brokenclaw Alpha and all the stupid things he made me feel.

Back at my apartment, I started to pack as swiftly as possible.

I wasn't too worried about my job, especially since Scott was under the impression I'd be nannying for Joe and had assumedly taken me off the schedule for the time being, anyway.

It wasn't much, but it was something. I'd miss the cafe and the people there, but the idea of not seeing Joe's smiling face and taking care of the baby he'd had with another woman every morning was a relief.

The trip would be a nice refresh, and with any luck, I'd be back within a week.

Just a little getaway. A quick visit to let my cousin know what was going on and a chance to clear my head.

I would have preferred the woods or a mountain, but at least my cousin was close to the beach.

I was sure she wouldn't mind me crashing her house for a few days, especially once she heard the whole story.

I drove an old Mercury, and my biggest worry was whether it would be able to make the drive or not.

There wasn't much I could do about it at the moment, and within an hour, I was throwing my duffle back in the trunk.

With the thought of the windows rolled down, the radio, and the road stretched out ahead, I was starting to feel better already. The farther away from home, the better.

Feeling like I was right on the verge of escape, and thrilled that I had found a way out of my situation without having to spill the embarrassing details to my friends, I grabbed the driver door handle and started to pull—

When a huge hand landed on the door above mine.

I was suddenly in shadow from the massive body behind me, and with my heart in my throat, I slowly turned.

“Going somewhere?” Joe Longwood asked. “Hopefully, to my place. I've already got your room made up for you.”