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CHAPTER SIX: BLUE EYES

STACEY

It’s been such a crazy day, I barely know which way is up. Not only is it the first day of practice, but Millie’s school is having a teacher institute day so I’ve had to have her with me this morning. I’m so frazzled that I hardly notice when the door to the PT reception area swings open. Assuming it’s Millie returning from the bathroom, I look up with a grin… only for my entire world to come to a screeching stop. I’m seeing things. I have to be. Or else this is some horrible dream. It can’t be real.

Owen Scott cannot be standing in front of me.

It’s been so long, and he looks so different, but I’d recognize those blue eyes anywhere. They’re Millie’s eyes. He’s taller. Broader. He used to wear his dirty blonde hair shaggy and longish, but now it’s longer on the top and cut short around his ears. He’s also clean-shaven, leaving his strong, square jaw on full display.

We stare at each other in shocked silence for several minutes. I don’t know what to do or say. All the hurt and confusion I felt that day I went to his house and couldn’t find him comes rushing through me, as sharp and brutal as if it just happened. I’m suddenly eighteen again, pregnant and terrified, and the boy I loved has disappeared without a word.

Why is he here? After all these years, how can he just appear like this? And why does my heart have to race in that same way it did when we were young and in love?

Suddenly, Janet steps out from her office.

“Oh! Are you Owen Scott?” she asks, oblivious to the tension thickening the air around us. A blush heats up my cheeks, feeling as though the two of us have been caught doing something embarrassing, even though we’re just standing on opposite sides of the room, staring at each other.

Owen tears his gaze from me and turns his attention to Janet.

“Uh, yes, I am,” he says with a nod, stealing another uncertain glance my way.

“Great, I’m Janet Parker, head PT. This is Stacey Dixon. She’s currently doing her residency with us. She’ll be taking care of your intake paperwork.”

I blink and turn to Janet with wide eyes. “In-intake paperwork?”

Janet arches a dark brow and frowns at me. “Yeah, Owen’s the new trade. Why else would he be here?”

No. Fucking. Way. Owen is the new trade?

This is just some crazy coincidence. I can’t believe this is actually happening. The odds have to be, like, a million to one that he’d join the Night Hawks the same year I’m doing my residency with them. Isn’t he supposed to be in Canada?

Damn it, I need to keep it together. I’m spiraling and I can’t let him see how much his sudden appearance is affecting me. Being shocked is normal, but he can’t see that I’m anxious or even scared. That would only make him suspicious, and then it would only be a matter of time before he asks about Millie.

I can’t talk to him about her. Not now. Not when he hasn’t acknowledged her in seven years.

“Stacey? You okay?”

Janet’s concerned tone yanks me out of the whirlwind spinning through my mind and I realize too late that I’ve just been standing and staring at her. Pull it together, Stace!

“Yeah, I’m good,” I say, doing my best to keep my voice calm and even. “Just tired today. I’ll take care of the newbie.”

“All right,” Janet says, apparently satisfied with my response. “I’ll leave you to it, then. You can take off when you’re done with him and leave the rest of the notes for tomorrow.”

“Great. Thanks, Janet.”

“Welcome to the Night Hawks,” Janet tells Owen before disappearing back into her office.

When we’re alone again, I look back at Owen. His lips curl into a warm, familiar smile. Fuck, he’s still so handsome… it’s not fair. Why couldn’t he have gotten out of shape and lost all his hair?

“Hey,” he says, “I can’t believe?—”

“So, Mr. Scott,” I cut him off. If I just pretend I don’t know him, maybe he’ll do the same. Crazy plan? Absolutely, but my brain is short-circuiting. I just have to get out of here as quickly as possible. “I have some paperwork for you to fill out.” I hold up an ipad and wave it in the air without meeting his gaze.

“Okay?”

“Once you do, leave it on the desk and I’ll schedule your PT physical and review for later this week. Unfortunately, I just remembered I have an appointment of my own that I really need to get to. If you have any questions, just leave the section blank, and we’ll go over it during your review.”

Still not meeting his eyes, I grab my jacket and hurry around the desk and hand him the papers as I rush past him.

“Welcome to the team!” I call as I rush out the door.

“Stacey, wait,” he calls after me, but I don’t stop and I don’t look back.

Shit, shit, shit! This can’t be happening right now. What the hell am I going to do? Of all the teams in the league, he just had to show up here.

I make my way toward the bathrooms and spot Millie as she’s coming out of the girls’ door. She smiles. My stomach clenches. I have to keep Millie away from him. What if she meets him, loves him, and he leaves her like he left me? I can’t let her go through something that devastating.

“Mommy! I just saw?—”

“Sorry, sweetheart, something’s come up,” I say, reaching down and grabbing her hand. “We need to get going.”

Millie frowns. “But you promised I could skate!”

“I’m sorry, baby, not today. Next time.” My voice sounds tense and breathless in my ears, and I’m struggling not to alarm her.

She pouts. “But you said?—”

“Honey, I know. I’ll make it up to you, I promise, but we just can’t today.”

Millie huffs. I do my best to keep my cool until we get to the car, and it’s less than a minute before I’ve gotten her in her booster seat. Only when I’m behind the wheel do I notice the sweat running down my back. I quickly dial Grace’s number as I fight to catch my breath.

She answers after the first ring.

“Stace!”

“Grace!” I exclaim. “Owen…”

“I saw him,” she says. “ I’m with Jensen right now. I’ll cancel the plans with the others tonight and come over.”

I glance up at the rearview mirror and watch Millie. She’s still pouting, but she’s not making a fuss. My heart feels like it’s going to burst. She’s my whole world. If I lose her, I’ll be devastated. We have such a good life here—I’ve worked so hard for both of us, and I can’t let Owen come in and crush everything I’ve done.

Realizing I don’t want to upset her with any of this, I tell Grace, “How about you come later? Around bedtime?”

There’s a beat of silence, and then Grace replies, “Yes, of course! Right. I’ll swing by later.”

“Thanks. Talk soon.” I sigh, hang up the call, and look back in the rearview mirror at Millie. “Hey, kiddo. How about some ice cream on the way home?”

Her eyes immediately light up, and all trace of her bad mood vanishes. “Okay!”

As Millie splashes happily in the bathtub, humming one of her favorite songs, I sit on the edge of the tub, pretending to focus on getting her shampoo ready, but my mind drifts. I can’t help thinking about everything that happened after Owen left Wisconsin. Telling my mom I was pregnant, and her reacting exactly the way I thought she would. Then, having to tell her that my baby’s father was gone and when I tried to call him again, the number was disconnected. Mom had been so condescending, telling me I was stupid for trusting a guy and now I had to deal with the consequences all by myself.

When she told me I was coming here to live with Gram, I was relieved. I still remember her exact words, “I paid my dues of motherhood raising you, and I refuse to give up my life yet again. Nor do I want my friends to know my eighteen year old is pregnant. You’re better off with your grandma. She’ll know what to do with you.” I think getting away from her when I did helped keep me from growing bitter and resentful like I feared I would. I didn’t turn into my mother… I figured out how to build a life I’m proud of and not give up my dreams.

Looking down at Millie, so happy and innocent, I can’t imagine how anyone could resent her. How anyone could abandon her.

My mother and Owen really fucked up when they left her behind.

A loud knock on the bathroom door jolts me out of the memory, and I turn to see Grace poking her head in, a soft smile on her face. She has a key to the house in case of emergencies—I needed someone to be able to get to Millie if needed and I was somehow incapacitated or unable to reach her, especially since Gram moved out.

“Need a hand with Miss Millie?” she asks, her voice cheerful and warm. It makes me want to cry, but I manage to keep hold of myself… barely.

Millie’s face lights up. “Grace! Will you read me a bedtime story?”

“Of course,” Grace says, grinning as she sits down beside us. She gives me a concerned look and I shake my head; later. We’ll talk later. We help Millie out of the tub, wrap her in a towel, and soon we’re all curled up in Millie’s room, Grace reading from my daughter’s favorite fairy-tale storybook. It’s not long before Millie’s eyes are growing heavy and soon, she’s curled up against Grace, fast asleep.

I watch them, a warmth spreading in my chest to mix with my anxiety and uncertainty. “You’re a natural with kids, you know that?”

Grace glances up and shrugs. “Maybe one day, but I’m in no rush. Jensen and I are taking things one step at a time.” Her eyes brighten as she adds, “Speaking of, we finally chose a wedding location.”

“Oh?” I sit up, eager for any distraction from the heaviness tugging at my heart and the thought of Owen somewhere out in this city. “Where?”

“Miami,” she says, beaming. “At the resort where we met and where he proposed. It was too hard choosing between Wisconsin and Colorado, so we thought, why not go back to where it all started?”

I can’t help but smile. It’s so perfectly them. “That’s fantastic, Grace. I’m completely on board with this idea.”

Her expression softens. “I’m so glad you agreed to be a bridesmaid, and Millie will be such a cute flower girl.”

My heart swells with excitement. “We wouldn’t miss it!”

Grace gently closes the book and slips out of the bed without disturbing her. I move to tuck Millie’s blankets in around her and take a moment to study her sleeping face. There’s so much of Owen in her. The curve of her nose, the dimples in her cheeks, the arch of her brow. My heart aches to think about the two of them meeting after all these years. I’m also angry, though. How dare he reject her. How dare he abandon this perfect little person.

How dare he abandon me.

The only communication I got from him was that awful letter that shattered my heart beyond repair…

Kissing Millie’s forehead, I brush a lock of her hair behind her ear before I turn, and Grace and I tiptoe out of the room.

We make it down to the living room and plop down on my couch together. Grace pins me with her gaze, her expression turning serious now that we’re alone.

“So… Owen.”

“Yeah, fucking Owen,” I grumble.

“Are you okay?” she asks. “Seeing him after so long?”

“Fuck, I don’t know.” I exhale. “Seeing him again stirred up a lot of emotions. Anger, hurt… more than that. He looked… well, he looked good. Really, really good. Better than he has any right to look, damn it.”

“Did he say anything about Millie?”

“No,” I murmur. “Not a word. To be fair, I kind of bolted out of the office before he had a chance to say anything too.”

“Okay, so when you see him again and he asks about her…?”

I shake my head. “I don’t know. If he wants to be in her life, what right do I have to deny him?”

After finding out that Owen did indeed go to Canada and that his mom had remarried, I Googled his new family and… wow. They’re like the Kennedys of Canada. Rich, powerful, and influential, they’re the kind of people who could rip away a child from a poor single mother without batting an eye.

“If he wants to be in her life and I say no, I’m afraid of where that could lead,” I confess.

Grace furrows her brow in concern. “What do you mean?”

My throat tightens. Just the thought of opening that door makes me feel like I’m choking.

“What if he tries to take Millie, Grace?” The words tumble out in a rush. “He left without a word, and then sent me that letter making it very clear he wanted nothing more to do with me. He’s never acknowledged Millie before, didn’t even say anything about her in the letter, but has he changed his mind and decided he wants her? What if he tries to take her from me?”

If he tries, what can I do to stop him?

Grace’s gaze softens with sympathy. “Stacey, you’re a fantastic mom. Nobody would ever question that, not even Owen.”

“But what if his mom or stepdad does?”

Grace places a gentle hand on my arm. “I’m here for you. I’ll do whatever I can to help. Millie isn’t going anywhere.”

“No, she isn’t.” My voice is firm, harsher than I mean for it to be. I still remember the pain of discovering that Owen was gone and that his house was empty. I don’t want to relive that or put Millie through anything that could hurt her. No one, not even Owen and his rich stepdad, will take my daughter from me or break her heart.

Grace sighs and shakes her head. “Look, the guy’s an asshole for never bothering to find you again. As much as I hate to say it, you might just need to talk to him about it face-to-face and deal with the situation right away. ”

I swallow, my heart pounding. “I’m not ready for that.”

She nods, her expression sympathetic. “That’s okay. You can take your time. You deserve that much. Still, you’re going to be working for the same team. Running into each other is inevitable. How are you going to handle that?”

Grace is right, and the idea of having to run into Owen over and over again has a cold sweat breaking out along my forehead. I have to deal with him… I simply have no other choice. This residency is too important to mess up, and I let Owen upend my life once already.

I’m not going to let him do it again.