Page 20 of Private Exhibit (Gentleman Hackers #4)

ANDY CAUGHT Devon before the boy could fall into the pond behind them, his heart racing in panic.

Oh gods. No. Not now! He shook the boy. “Devon? Devon?” Andy held him with one arm and used the other hand to check for a pulse. His eyes stung when he felt it. Andy let out a shuddering breath and shook Devon again. “Devon? Look at me. Come on, sweet boy. Wake up.”

Devon slowly blinked, looking like he was coming out of a daze.

He stared up at Andy for a moment as though he didn't recognize him, then his eyes went wide as his entire face turned red.

“Oh my gods. Did I faint? I totally fainted, didn't I? Holy hells.” He covered his face with both hands. “This is humiliating.”

Andy breathed a laugh through a sigh of relief, then he sucked in a heavy breath and held it, feeling his eyes stinging again. He forced himself to slowly let the breath back out. Once he was sure he could speak without any trouble, he asked, “That wasn't an attack?”

Devon shook his head behind his hands.

“You're sure?” Andy insisted.

Devon nodded. “I'm gonna go die of embarrassment now,” he mumbled into his palms.

“Gods, don't say that,” Andy gasped, holding him a little tighter. Fuck . He shouldn't be touching the boy. Not even as a doctor. But he couldn't resist. Now that he had Devon in his arms, he never wanted to let go.

Devon slowly lowered his hands, grimacing down at the ground. “Sorry,” he mumbled.

Andy let out a shuddering breath. “You have nothing to be sorry for,” he whispered, fighting with everything he had not to kiss the boy right then and there.

Andy swallowed hard, then made himself start to pull away.

He watched to make sure Devon was steady on his own before he slowly let go. “Feeling alright?”

Devon nodded again.

“Good,” Andy murmured. “That's–”

Devon gasped and whirled on him, his eyes wide. “Wait. If your son…then you…” He studied Andy's face, a frown slowly creasing his brow. “No, it couldn't be from you. You wouldn't have lived this long.”

“Oh,” Andy said, realizing what Devon meant.

“Yeah.” He looked away, feeling that punch of betrayal all over again.

“That was the worst part. Lydia was a carrier for Ashworth-Grahams and she knew it. She never said a word. Not when she found out she was pregnant, nor when the early scans showed it was going to be a boy.” Andy muttered a curse.

“She knew our child was going to die and she had him anyway.

If we'd had a girl instead, everything would have been different.” Andy stared at the ground.

“I saw it on her face, when the doctors came back with the test results.

The lack of surprise. The guilt. For all intents and purposes, our marriage ended that day.

We stayed together for Junior's sake, but we lived like roommates.

All the romance and passion were gone. I couldn't trust her. I could barely look at her some days.” Andy breathed a bitter laugh.

“What?” Devon quietly asked.

Andy shook his head and pointed at the hospital building.

“We used to live right up there. The upper floors are all apartments.

It's mostly doctors who live there. Nice and convenient, especially when you're on-call. For me, it was perfect. I was always a few steps away from work, so if I woke up in the middle of the night with an idea, I could simply run downstairs to my lab and go over files or run some tests.” Andy shook his head.

“After Junior died, Lydia moved out right away. Went to live with her parents.” He laughed bitterly again.

“She said she couldn't stand to look at me .

Junior could almost be my twin. Put pictures of us side-by-side at the same ages, and we're hard to tell apart.

But Lydia said she couldn't look at me anymore because all she could see was the man her son would never grow up to be.”

Devon quietly gasped. “Even though she'd known all along…”

Andy nodded.

“I'm so sorry,” Devon whispered.

Andy flashed him a quick smile of thanks, then took a deep breath and sat up straight, feeling like a weight had been lifted off his shoulders.

Gods . It felt good to talk to Devon. To be near him. He almost couldn't believe he'd just admitted his deepest, darkest guilt to someone, but with Devon, it had almost been easy.

The relief left Andy feeling shaky all over.

A low vibration sounded. Devon jumped, then breathed a laugh. “Sorry,” he gasped. “My phone. It's probably Oliver.” He wriggled his phone out of his pocket and unlocked it. “Yep.”

Andy couldn't resist looking. A text thread filled the screen, with the most recent message asking if Devon was alright.

Devon quickly typed back that he was fine, then looked up and all around. “Shoot. It's getting late.”

“I should get you home,” Andy murmured.

Neither of them moved.

Eventually, Devon sighed and stood up. “Thank you for coming out with me.”

Andy couldn't help smiling. “My pleasure.” He paused. “Thank you for listening.”

Devon smiled shyly and ducked his head, then quickly typed another message about being on his way before he stuffed his phone back into his pocket.

Andy got up and walked beside him as they made their way back across the plaza. “Are you and Oliver–”

“What?” Devon asked, looking up at him.

“You know…” Andy waited. “Together?”

“Together?” Devon asked

“It's just…I've seen plenty of couples in open relationships–”

Devon breathed a laugh. “Oh! Gods, no. No, I've never dated anybody.

And we are totally not one another's type.

Oliver and me, I mean. No, we're just roommates. Well, friends now, too.” Devon looked down.

“I tried living on my own, but eventually I had to accept that it was too dangerous.” He grimaced.

“I had an attack once that left me paralyzed from the neck down.

I was stuck there on the floor for hours.

Couldn't reach my phone. Couldn't call out for help. I thought for sure I was going to die there. As soon as it was over…” Devon shook his head.

“Well, as soon as it was over, I had to clean myself up and eat something because I was filthy and starving . But once I felt back to normal, I put out a want ad for a roommate. Free room and board in exchange for taking care of me when I have my attacks. Oliver was the only one to respond.” He blushed.

“It was really awkward at first. Still is, from time to time.

But he's my best friend now. And he's had a really rough life. Living on the streets and…worse.”

Andy winced.

“So it's nice to know that I can give him a relatively stable home. I'm hoping to save up a little bit of money before I…Well. You know. I want to leave him something to live off of so he won't have to go back to that.”

Shit . Andy's chest tightened. Before I die , Devon had been going to say.

“Maybe I should sign that check over to him,” Devon whispered as though talking to himself. “It might not even be enough to cover all the debts he has piled up, but it would help. And it's not like I'm going to need it–”

“Whoa, sorry!” someone cried, stepping around one of the marble statues and nearly running into them.

Andy automatically reached for Devon, but the boy was fine. Never lost his footing. Andy looked up to see a young man stumbling back, smiling apologetically at them.

Then the young man looked at Andy and scowled. “Oh. Well if it isn't Doctor Asshole.”

Andy grimaced, recognizing him. It was one of his interviewees. The boy had been breathtakingly beautiful but almost annoyingly chipper.

The boy gasped, looking at Devon. “Oh! Hey. I remember you. You interviewed right after–” He broke off, looking from Andy to Devon and back.

“Oh,” he deadpanned, then blinked and looked at them again, even taking a step back as he studied them.

“Oh hells ,” he said through a breathy gasp, his eyes going wide.

“My gods, the sexual tension between you two.

Holy shit. You guys clearly haven't banged yet but you should toooootally bang. That would be epic.”

Devon turned right red.

“How could you possibly know that?” Andy couldn't help asking.

The boy tossed his head, making his golden curls bounce.

“I was trained by a member of the Erosti Leisure Guild.

I can usually read a person's sexuality and kinks from a mile away. And you two!” He fanned himself.

“Yeah. Wow. Put you guys in front of a mirror or an audience, and the world might catch on fire.”

Devon gave a squeak of embarrassment.

And Andy felt his cock start to go hard. Holy hells . He shifted his stance, trying to think of anything other than sex.

Because he could picture it way too easily: himself and Devon in front of a mirror. Or, even better, in front of an audience, enjoying Devon's body while strangers watched them. Fuck . It sounded so hot.

“Speaking of an audience,” the boy said, “I need to get to work.

I've got a shift at The Dungeon. That glory hole isn't going to fill itself.” He looked at Devon.

“It was nice seeing you again.” He fluttered his fingers in a wave and practically danced away before either Andy or Devon could respond.

Andy cleared his throat. “Well. That was…”

“Yeah,” Devon breathed.

Andy frowned. “What the heck is the Erosti Leisure Guild?” he mumbled to himself.

“Um.” Devon shifted his stance. “They're basically glorified prostitutes. Highly revered on Erostil.” When Andy raised his eyebrows, Devon blushed again. “I read a lot when I'm…”

“Ah,” Andy murmured with a nod. When he's stuck in an attack , he realized.

“It was video games for Junior,” he said quietly.

“When he had use of his hands, anyway.” Andy glanced in the direction the other boy had gone, then cleared his throat again before shoving his hands into his pockets, trying to subtly adjust his pants. “We should–”

“Yeah,” Devon repeated.

They both hesitated before they continued walking.

The rest of the walk back was silent. Andy was achingly aware of the boy beside him, more than close enough to touch, but he resisted. Even just holding Devon's hand might make him burn.

But it all felt so right. A simple, quiet stroll. A perfect, quiet companionship on a truly beautiful evening.

They stopped to admire the jacaranda tree again, then continued on their way. Andy walked Devon right up to his apartment door. He waited there while Devon dug out his keys, then found himself blurting out, “I had a great time tonight.”

Devon smiled shyly. “Me, too.” He fiddled with his keys. “Thanks for coming with me.”

“Thank you, again, for listening.”

Devon's smile turned bittersweet.

Fuck . Andy wanted to kiss him so badly, but he had to resist. He rubbed the back of his neck. “So I guess I'll see you tomorrow? Oh. No. Wait. It's the weekend. Isn't it?”

Devon nodded. “Mister Bokin did say tomorrow was optional, but I was thinking of going in.”

“You don't have to do that,” Andy made himself say. “You should enjoy your weekend.” And he meant it, knowing how little time Devon probably had left. But can I really go two whole days without seeing him?

Devon shrugged. “I think I only need one more day to clear the last of that pile on the desk. It would be nice to start fresh next week with the next project.”

Andy bit back a smile. “Alright. Well.” He found himself swaying towards Devon and quickly stopped himself, trying to cover the movement with a shift in his weight from one foot to the other. Andy shoved his hands back into his pockets, determined to keep them there. “Have a good night.”

“You, too,” Devon whispered.

Andy took a step back, watching the boy let himself into the apartment. Once the door was shut and the lock clicked into place, Andy let out a heavy sigh and turned away.

He rode the elevator back down to the lobby, then walked back to his car in a daze.

The whole evening had felt like a date. That hadn't remotely been his intention, but that was how it turned out.

Andy shook his head. Gods . He hadn't been on a date in over twenty years. He'd actually forgotten how it felt.

Despite all the painful discussions, it had been perfect.

Andy dropped into the driver's seat of his car, punched the icon for Home on the navigation system, and sat back, closing his eyes out of habit.

He jerked upright in the seat. Devon wouldn't close his eyes.

The boy would look at everything, taking it all in, looking for the beauty through the overwhelm.

Andy purposely studied the view all around him as the car drove itself.

Gods . So many things he'd missed. So much he'd ignored.

Even the little things like a stunning piece of architecture or a vibrant flower.

It was like seeing the world for the first time all over again.

A store sign flashed by. Andy pulled a double-take, practically twisting around in his seat, then slammed on the brake, overriding the automated system.

Cars behind him lurched to a stop and a chorus of horns blared.

Andy put down the window and waved an apology, then yanked the car into the first available parking spot.

He got out and jogged back down the block, looking for the sign. When he spotted it, he ducked right into the shop, relieved that it was still open.

The cloying scent of flowers surrounded him. Andy quickly browsed as he made his way to the sales counter, but there were too many choices. Too much color.

Gods. What are you even doing here? This is a mistake . Andy turned to leave.

“Good evening,” the sales clerk called, greeting him with a smile. “Can I help you find anything?”

No , Andy told himself. “Yes,” he blurted out, reaching for his wallet. “Can I have something delivered tomorrow morning?”

“Absolutely. What would you like?”

Andy felt his heartbeat kick up a notch. Fucking hells . He shouldn't be doing this, yet he couldn't seem to resist, hoping it would make Devon smile.

“Snapdragons,” he murmured. “He likes snapdragons…”