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THREE

Rowan

With game one delayed for two days so the team can regroup and recover, wait for new players to arrive, and get in some practice, it seems like I should have time to catch my breath, but it’s actually the opposite. Gene had not one but two heart attacks, and his subsequent stent surgery has him out of commission for an indefinite period of time.

Which means I’m now in charge.

And I’ve been working nonstop since the accident.

The Blizzard has been gracious enough to share their facilities with us under extenuating circumstances like these, and I’ve been in their training room all day for the second day in a row. I’m exhausted but also exhilarated, and I can see the strain on the guys. Five guys from the Rebels flew in yesterday, and though I haven’t seen them yet, I figure I will today.

For the first time, I feel a little bit of panic.

I’m busy .

I don’t have time for drama.

While I’d like to think Blake and I have grown up and there won’t be any awkwardness, how can there not be? Our breakup was a long time ago, but it was the hardest thing I’ve ever gone through romantically. I’d been head over heels in love with him, and he chose hockey.

A decade later and it still hurts.

A little.

I’m not pining for him.

Far from it.

I’ve had sex, lovers, and even relationships since then, but I’ve never been in love like that. They say nothing ever matches your first love, and it feels like that’s the truth.

“Rowan.” I hear my name and turn.

“Harper. Hello!” I’m not surprised to see the team owner, Harper Barrowman-DeLugo, but I hadn’t seen her since before we left L.A. She’d had things to take care of and flew separately so she hadn’t been on the flight—or the bus—with us. Thank God. She’s pregnant and I don’t even want to think about what could have happened if she was in that accident.

“How are you?” she asks, coming over to give me a warm hug.

“I’m good. Busy but good.”

“I want you to know, there’s going to be a bonus in your next paycheck. I heard how brave you were… how you saved Gene’s life.”

“I was just doing my job,” I say softly. “A bonus isn’t necessary.”

“Maybe not, but you’re getting one anyway.”

“Thank you.”

“If you need help, please ask. I know there are supposed to be two of you and now it’s just you, so if you need one of the equipment assistants to help out, just let me or Drake know.”

“Thanks, Harper. I think I’ll be okay unless we have some kind of crisis on the ice.”

“Let’s hope that doesn’t happen.” She smiles. “Anyway, make sure you take time to rest, okay? We need you and you’re of no help to us if you get sick.”

I smile. “Don’t worry about me.”

“I worry about all of you. You’re my family. And this series is so important. The guys worked so hard to get here.”

“I know.” I shake my head. “I hate that this happened. Not just because someone could have been seriously hurt, but also because of how much it means to us to get to the playoffs.”

“Fate always has its own plans,” Harper says with a smile. “All we can do is go along for the ride.”

“You’re right about that.”

We chat for another few minutes and she leaves. I’m done for the day, so I start packing up my things so I can leave the training room the way I found it since the Blizzard has been so generous in letting us use it.

“Hey, Rowan, you got a minute?”

“Hey.” I turn to Canyon. “What’s going on?”

“My neck. It’s been tight ever since the accident, and after skating this morning, it’s worse.”

“Maybe a minor touch of whiplash from the accident,” I murmur. “Sit down.”

He sinks onto a chair, and I put my hands on his neck, feeling for knots or bruises.

“Tell me what hurts,” I say.

“There.” He grimaces.

“Okay, that’s just a knot. Let me work on it. Hang on.” I pull out some therapeutic lotion with essential oils—a blend I create myself—and rub some between my palms. “Take your shirt off.”

He’s quick to comply, and I rub my hands together a little to warm up the lotion. Then I press down on either side of his neck, right where it curves into his shoulders. I press my thumbs into the knot and the same spot on the opposite side and he moans.

“Fuck, Ro, that’s good.” His chin hits his chest and I focus on a combination of relaxation and working on the knot. If I just go at the knot, it’ll hurt even more tomorrow, and that’s not the goal here.

“Breathe, nice and steady,” I encourage. “I’m keeping the pressure medium because you don’t want additional soreness tomorrow.”

“I don’t.” He’s not a huge guy, not like Jensen or even Ivan, but he’s solid. His shoulders are strong and muscular, giving me a nice canvas to work on as I knead and massage.

“You’re the best,” he murmurs. “You’re getting a really big bonus next Christmas.”

I chuckle. “Why is everyone throwing money at me all of a sudden?”

“Well, how else can we thank you?”

It feels good to be appreciated, one of many things I love about this job.

“Okay, I think you’re good to go,” I say twenty minutes later. “Any more massage and that knot is going to throb like a mother in a few hours. I want you to drown yourself in water the rest of today—double what you normally drink. See if we can flush the toxins out of your system. Take Tylenol before bed and again when you wake up, before the morning skate.”

“Got it.” He stands up and is just pulling his shirt over his head when there’s movement in the doorway.

“Hey, Rowan.”

It’s been nearly ten years, yet I know that voice anywhere.

It sends shivers down my spine, and I’m grateful for Canyon’s presence as I slowly turn around.

“Hi, Blake.”

Jesus.

How has he gotten even hotter over the years?

He’s taller than I remember, and his blond hair is a few shades darker than when we were in high school, but everything else is the same. Just…bigger. Stronger. Hotter .

Fuck.

What the hell is wrong with me?

“Hey, guys.” Canyon has his shirt back on and goes over to shake hands with Blake and the two guys with him. One is Bodi something or other, and the second guy has played with the Phantoms multiple times this season.

“Good to see you, Warren. Bodi.” Does my voice sound funny? I really hope not. I have to stay professional. No matter how hard it is.

“Are massages part of the routine?” Bodi asks, arching his brows.

Before I can respond, Canyon gives him a look of annoyance. “If something hurts or needs attention, yes. But not just because it feels good. Rowan’s doing this job alone now that Gene is out on medical leave, so we don’t want to tire her out. We need her in top form when we’re on the ice tomorrow night.”

“Oh, right. Yeah, I was joking.” Bodi looks a little chagrined, and I’m glad Canyon was here because I probably would have said something snarky.

“You guys need anything?” I ask politely. “I’ve been here all day, and I was getting ready to go back to the hotel.”

“We just came by to say hello,” Warren says. “There was a team meeting and then we wanted to check out the arena. Never been here before.”

I want to say something about how this isn’t a vacation, but I bite back the snippy response. Seeing Blake has me feeling all kinds of ways, so the sooner I get out of here the better.

“I’ll head back with you, Canyon,” I tell him.

“The bus already left but I just called an Uber. Let’s go.”

“Can we head back with you?” Bodi asks. “We didn’t realize we’d missed the bus.”

“Uber isn’t big enough for all of us,” Canyon says. “But let me see if I can change it.”

Great.

Now I’m going to be stuck in a confined space with Blake and his friends.

They’re chattering away with Canyon, asking him a million questions about the playoffs and mentioning people I don’t know. It’s probably better. I grab the front seat when the minivan arrives, so I don’t have to sit directly with the guys, and I stare out the window, trying to ignore the fact that Blake freakin’ Rourke is just a few feet away from me.

We were together for more than three years, all through sophomore, junior, and senior years of high school. We went to a private prep school with an excellent hockey program. I got to go because it was local and I got a scholarship for my good grades; he was there for hockey. And from the first moment we met, we’d been smitten. There’s no other way to describe it.

It had been so easy to fall in love with him.

Until he shattered my heart, right along with my hopes and dreams for the future.

I have different dreams now, and most of them are coming true, but seeing him brings me back to a time when it felt like I’d lost everything.

Dammit.

I’m better than this.

The moment the van stops in front of our hotel, I’m out of the vehicle and striding through the lobby toward the elevator banks.

“Rowan, wait up.”

Fuck. Me.

“I’ve got some things to do,” I say without looking at him.

“You want to get a drink or something? Catch up?” He pauses next to me as the elevator doors open.

“I really don’t have time,” I say, stepping inside.

“It’s good to see you,” he continues, holding the door open by pressing his hand on the side. His gorgeous blue eyes find mine and it’s hard to breathe for a second or two. “I was glad to hear you weren’t hurt… in the accident.”

Christ.

Now he’s being nice .

That’s what made me fall in love with him in the first place.

That and those damn blue eyes.

But I don’t have the time or energy for a trip down memory lane.

“Thanks, I appreciate that,” I say instead. I push the button for my floor. “I’ll see you at breakfast. Have a good night.” I momentarily meet his gaze, almost daring him not to let the doors close.

He hesitates but then nods and steps back.

The doors slowly come together, erasing his handsome face from view, and I let out a breath.

What the fuck was that?

If we’re going to be working together for the next week or two, I have to keep my emotions in check and my head on straight.

I’m not a heartbroken eighteen-year-old who just caught her boyfriend with a bunch of puck bunnies at a college frat party.

I’m not that young, emotional wreck who had to go to community college for a year after realizing that following Blake to college in Minnesota would be a huge mistake.

No, I’m all grown up and I have a job to do.

I don’t have time for Blake Rourke.

Or his stupid, gorgeous, breathtaking blue eyes.