Page 35 of Peacock Me Like a Hurricane (Rise of the Resistance #2)

AMANDA

E ver since she was a child, she felt a deep connection to nature. When she walked through the woods, she could hear the trees whispering and feel the pulse of the Earth beneath her feet. But others made fun of her for believing in things that couldn’t be seen or understood.

As she grew older, she sought out places with magical histories, like Stonehenge and Salem, and felt at home among the other visitors who shared her beliefs. She always believed that she had been given a special understanding of the world and its hidden wonders.

So when she was offered the chance to move into the Rift, a place full of mystery and magic, she eagerly accepted. However, she soon discovered that it wasn’t quite what she expected. While the Rift may have been created through science, it held its own kind of magic. And the people there were deeply entrenched in their own family units, making it difficult for her to find her place among them.

Despite her best efforts to connect with those who seemed to hold the keys to belonging, even her custom-made counterpart Constantine didn’t make her feel completely at home. She longed for a deeper connection with someone, like many women in the Rift had with their mates. But so far, that feeling has eluded her.

I’ve been trying to get closer to the leader of our community, but it seems like she’s always surrounded by her inner circle. Desperate for a sense of belonging, I started reaching out to others in the group instead. I’ve been rejected each time, making me feel even more lonely and isolated.

In an attempt to find my own path and identity, I’ve embarked on personal quests. However, my new friends can’t fill the void of not being part of the “in” crowd. Despite their support, I still long to be a part of the leader’s inner circle.

When Deli invited me to participate in their Beltane ritual, it felt like a ray of sunlight shining on my face. I’ve been a part of similar rituals before, but never in a place as magical and otherworldly as the Rift. The invitation made me feel included and gave me hope that this could be my chance to finally become one of them.

Sari, one of my new friends, offered me a ride with her and Calista to the ritual site. She has been so supportive and her family, as well as her partner Belle’s family, have helped me in my quests. Sari also listens to my frustrations about not fitting in with the leader’s group and gives me advice on how to approach them. Belle, on the other hand, is more rebellious and wants to tear down any barriers that separate us from them.

The tension between Sari and Deli hung thick in the air. As they were all gathered together, preparing for the Queen’s arrival, it was clear that Sari was vying for her attention. The others tried to offer advice, but it seemed like they didn’t truly understand Sari or her family dynamics. She couldn’t help but feel a sense of isolation as she listened to their well-meaning but misguided words. Trying to push those thoughts aside, she focused on the beauty of the nature surrounding them, thanks to Deli’s efforts.

As the ceremony drew closer, Sari couldn’t help but feel a sense of longing for a mate to balance out the light and dark within her. Giving herself over to the Goddess and trusting her to choose a suitable partner felt both exhilarating and terrifying at the same time. Though she had someone in mind that she hoped would be chosen, she couldn’t shake off the fear that they might already be taken by another member of their community before it was her turn.

Once Deli has us consecrate the circle and gives us our positions, I wait eagerly, candle in hand, hoping the influx of power is as real as she led us to believe. While I may have a connection to the world of magick, I’ve never met a real user. I cannot wait to see?—

Holy Hell.

That woman is not a solitary practitioner dancing about the woods like a flower child, as my new cohorts suggested. Sari and Belle scoffed at this, but admitted that because Sari loves the cat, she had to ‘go along’ with this silliness to make her happy. They are gravely mistaken in their judgments.

The second she has us call the quarters, an enormous surge of energy hits the circle and I have to concentrate hard to be an empty vessel to receive it.

Deli is a High Priestess, and she has been keeping it a secret the entire time she’s been living here. That woman, cat—whatever you want to call her—just overflowed with more energy than I’ve felt before, even in a magickal hotspot like Stonehenge. I don’t think she’s tapping the well to do it, either. I don’t know if that’s how she’s always been or if that’s an amplification of the Rift, but methinks the tiny mechanical bulldog might be pulling the tail of a monster.

I’m not saying she’s evil, but I’m saying you don’t tug on Wonder Woman’s lasso, right?

I close my eyes and let out a deep breath, trying to push the thoughts of Constantine’s betrayal out of my mind. I focus on singing my invitation to the goddess, feeling the familiar energy coursing through me. Deli finishes her chant and the fire roars, its flames reaching towards the sky like fiery columns from Olympus.

My whole body tenses as I feel her presence, slithering up my legs and filling every inch of me. She invades my senses and I can sense her exploring every corner of my being. When I open my eyes, they are no longer mine but hers. Instead of connecting with the Celtic goddess I had intended to call upon, I am filled with Laverna, the Roman deity associated with dishonesty and thievery.

I am taken aback by this unexpected possession, but Laverna’s voice whispers in my mind, praising the vessel that I have offered her. She explains that during Beltane’s celebration of rebirth, it is not uncommon for gods and goddesses to possess those who seek their guidance. However, she also warns me that many witches falsely call upon deities who they want to be rather than who they truly are.

As I survey the rest of the circle, I notice that my vision is hindered in certain areas. There’s a thick cloud hovering over one couple, foretelling a storm ahead. Another pair is surrounded by the scent of a pack and the rustling of trees, while another duo is engulfed in a bright light so intense that it blocks my view entirely.

As I watch the figures in the circle, I can feel the intense energy emanating from them. Their bodies are entwined in a passionate embrace, their purple and sparkly light casting an otherworldly glow around them. But amidst the beauty of their bond, I sense a dark presence trying to break through. Laverna, my goddess companion, urges me to assist her in letting this darkness enter. But I refuse, knowing it will bring harm and suffering.

Suddenly, Wilde appears before me with his familiar predator-like stride. We have a complicated history, as he once offered to help me end my life during one of my quests. Unsure if it was meant as a joke or a serious offer, I no longer trust him.

Laverna’s voice echoes in my head, excited at the sight of Wilde. She sees the god within him and believes he is a perfect mate for me. But I know better than to trust her judgement.

“It’s been too long, milady,” says Wilde with a sly smile. My heart races as I realize it truly is him, not the god Laverna had hoped for.

My heart races as I stand before him, the lingering fear from his previous “help” still present. Despite my nerves, I resist the urge to flee. Breaking the circle could have disastrous consequences with multiple powerful magicians inside.

But it seems fate has brought us together for a reason. He sees a spark within me, a potential match for a mischievous goddess from a distant land. As he speaks, his emerald eyes glint with mischief and I can see the image of horns sprouting from his head.

Wilde is infused with the spirit of Loki, the god of chaos and deception. My mind immediately conjures images of his power and influence, causing Laverna, the goddess who resides within me, to stir with glee.

I am suddenly aware of the magnitude of Deli’s abilities - she can call upon multiple pantheons of gods and goddesses simultaneously. And they come with so much power that they could easily take over even without being called upon.

The realization hits me like a ton of bricks - our High Priestess is not just a sorceress, but a powerful one at that. A chill runs down my spine as I wonder what other deities she might bring forth and how we will control their powers.

The clone clears his throat, snapping me out of my thoughts. His impatience is evident in his glowing eyes as he waits for me to respond. I struggle against Laverna’s urge to take over completely, but I know I made a choice when I offered myself as a chalice willingly. Now, I must honor that decision and allow her access to my body and soul.

Regrets, I have a few.

As soon as he appeared, I knew I had made a mistake. Doubt and fear flooded my mind as the goddess Deli’s words echoed in my head. But it was too late. The God of Mischief, Laverna, had already arrived.

I could feel his amused gaze on me as he spoke, his words laced with mischief and deceit. And just like always, I couldn’t trust either of them.

Laverna’s hand reached out to touch my cheek, and I couldn’t help but flinch away from her touch. My skin still burned from the last time she had used me for her own gain.

But this time, it seemed like they were here for a different purpose. They claimed to have been summoned, and that they were here to help me see the truth about myself. But how could I believe them when their entire existence revolved around trickery and manipulation?

I tried to protest, to tell them that I wanted no part in their games. But Laverna just laughed at my feeble attempts to resist. She was going to use me again, whether I liked it or not.

And so I resigned myself to their presence, knowing that somehow, they would guide me down a path of deception and deceit once again.

As each woman called out to her chosen goddess, the forest came alive with the sounds and smells of their presence. Deli’s voice echoed through the trees as she summoned Bast, while Calista’s seductive tone carried on the wind as she called for Diana. Sari’s deception was palpable as she pretended to call upon Freya, but in reality, she had shifted back to Kali. Each goddess held immense power and danger, and yet the women had chosen them based on their personalities rather than their abilities.

But now that they were all together in this clearing, a sense of unease settled over the group. Laverna and Loki seemed like insignificant players compared to these powerful beings. What could they possibly want from this union? And what would happen if one of them decided they didn’t want to let go?

Forced into a mating ceremony with Wilde, who had almost killed her before, fear and anger coursed through our narrator. Despite her desperate plea to the Goddess to spare her from this fate, it seemed as though she was merely a pawn in a larger game. But for what purpose, and at what cost?

He takes my face in his hands and I gasp, seeing him through the eyes of the Goddess. He is beautiful, as are they all, but his beauty is marred by the actions he took. Everything about him looks ethereal and gentle, but I know that is an illusion created by the master of illusions.

Wilde hunted me in my home, and allowed me to go further with my blackness than anyone else ever has. Do I deserve this for blaming him for following my request?

“I should not ask, but I feel compelled to ask for your forgiveness.” His eyes plead with me.

Laverna and Loki laugh inside us, calling us insignificant specks who focus on things that do not make the Universe bat a lash.

We are but specks on the wheel of time.

As Laverna forcefully guides me forward, I resist and struggle to break free from her grasp. She whispers in my mind, reminding me of my commitments and promising the benefits of obedience once we are through. My thoughts drift to Wilde and I wonder how many of his lovers have witnessed this side of him. Am I just another victim or have I provoked him with my own arrogance? Closing my eyes, I try to follow Laverna’s instructions, desperate for this ordeal to be over.

But Loki’s voice cuts through our mental connection, mocking humanity’s trivial concerns and reminding me that only the future matters. Anger surges within me as I break free from Laverna’s grip, refusing to accept Loki’s arrogant dismissal of what happened to me.

Wilde tries to apologize and make amends for his role in allowing the demon inside him to harm me. But I cannot forgive him for gleefully participating in my self-destruction, despite my pleas for him to stop. His hands trace over the bruises he left on my neck and I feel a surge of rage towards him.

How dare he ask me to let it go after what he did?

Despite my protests, Laverna insisted that I confront Wilde. As he stood before me, I could feel his energy pulsing with both anger and regret. The scratches on my arms told the story of our recent physical altercation. “You were fulfilling her wish,” I say, struggling to maintain composure. “But you didn’t understand the consequences of your actions.”

Wilde’s eyes flicker with annoyance as he rubs at the scratches on my arms. “I didn’t mean to harm you or make you afraid,” he says.

But I can see the self-righteous smirk forming on his lips. He doesn’t truly understand the gravity of his actions. “Love should have won out over your inability to control your temper,” I retort.

Laverna interjects, her voice dripping with derision. “Oh, please. These vessels are nothing but liars, and they only deceive themselves! This body harbors a demon hungry for blood and revenge, and when it couldn’t find its usual prey, it accepted this girl’s offer. She has a death wish because she’s always felt misunderstood and mistreated. It’s a wonder her parents didn’t get rid of her years ago.”

Tears well up in my eyes as I listen to their callous words. But amidst the deity chatter and insults, Wilde’s words strike a chord within me. It’s no surprise that I would attract not only abusive humans but also mocking deities into my life. It’s a vicious cycle that I’ve never been able to break out of.

Suddenly, the conversation clicks into place as Loki laughs at my realization. If I want something in this life, I can’t sit idly by and wait for it to come to me. I have to take charge and claim what is rightfully mine.

But then I remember my nightmares and the constant fear that plagues me. How can I possibly work with Wilde and his kind when I’m so afraid of them? It’s a daunting task, but I know that I have to push past my fear if I ever want to claim the life I deserve.

The voice of the Goddess purrs in my ear and I gasp as his hands grasp my hips, pulling me to him. In one movement, I know his intentions and it prevents me from fleeing at the same time. Loki and Laverna are growing impatient with our dilly dallying.

It is time for the ceremony. They are hungry.

As I lean into him, the familiar scent of tobacco lingers on his skin. He places a soft kiss on my forehead, then moves slowly down to my lips. My body tenses at first, but his touch is gentle and reassuring. His hands wander, tracing patterns on my back as our kiss deepens.

As our bodies entwine, my fear begins to fade away. The goddess inside me hums with pleasure, encouraging me to let go and trust in this moment. And so, I do.

With a tenderness that surprises me, he undresses me and whispers sweet words in my ear. Every touch from his skilled hands sends sparks of electricity through my body. Our kiss grows more urgent as we surrender to each other.

I feel the goddess’s power flowing through me, leading me to make the choice to forgive him. And as we move together in perfect rhythm, I know I have made the right decision. Forgetting all hesitation and doubt, we become lost in each other’s embrace like two puzzle pieces fitting perfectly together.

In this moment, there is only us and the goddess’s presence surrounding us with warmth and love. And as we continue to explore and discover each other’s bodies, all fears and doubts melt away until there is only pleasure and ecstasy left behind.

The hum in me rises to a fever pitch; she’s pushing against me and pulling him toward me. When I open my eyes, I gasp, my heart thudding in my ears. He is framed by the Beltane fire, and my breath catches watching the flames engulf him and explode from him in a sea of power. “My God.”

“My Goddess,” he replies.

Shuddering and groaning, his hair spills out of his ribbon, tickling my face. I reach up and push it back, caressing his cheeks and losing myself in his eyes. Never have I seen any so blue and deep, I know I’m drowning.

The energy building in and around us whines. It could be our own voices making the sound, but I can’t tell. God and Goddess unite, discovering each other, and creating a flow of ancient power. Its tingling fingers stream through Wilde to me and back again.

A sudden jolt hits me; I have one more irrevocable act to accept the ultimate truth with a gesture of supplication. I meet his gaze. “I trust you.”

Slowly I turn my head and bare my neck, whatever remnant of fear or doubt I had remaining vanished. I brace myself for the bite. His lips close over my skin, and he lovingly kisses the pulsing artery. Then, nothing.

I lift my gaze to meet his intense stare, my eyelashes fluttering as I try to process the overwhelming emotions coursing through me. He leans in closer, his breath warm against my face, and a smile tugs at the corners of his full lips. His rhythmic movements never falter, expertly bringing me closer and closer to the edge of pleasure.

But then he pauses, pulling back slightly as if sensing my hesitation. With a gentle kiss on my lips, he whispers words of reassurance and love, before resuming his entrancing pace.

As our bodies move together in perfect harmony, I feel powerful waves of energy emanating from us, blending and merging into one another. My mind is filled with images and thoughts of Wilde, Laverna, and Loki - all fighting for control over me, but ultimately being overpowered by my love for this man who holds me close.

In a moment of pure bliss, I surrender completely to him, releasing all inhibitions and letting myself be carried away by the tide of pleasure. And as I come down from my high, surrounded by his warmth and gentleness, I know that our lives will forever be intertwined, bound by love and destiny.

The presence of mischief and thievery fades away as we drift off into peaceful slumber, our bodies entwined in an unbreakable bond. And though they may still try to manipulate us from afar, we are now strong enough to resist their antics - together as one united force.

Snuggling deeper into the curve of his body, I bury my head in his chest and sigh appreciatively. Fingers trickle along my spine, and dance in a familiar circle along the edges of the Celtic knot work tattoos along the back of my pelvis. The shift of weight against me is like any night at home, and it feels so good.

“Mmm Mandy,” a voice coos.

A simple melody filters in my ears from that same voice. Before I know it, I’m humming in my head and hearing the words of the song Constantine sang to me in the den during the winter when I was so down.

Snapping my eyes open, I am blinded by the brightness of the bonfire. When my eyes finally adjust, I look up into his eyes. The bottom drops out of my stomach as I realize these are not the eyes I almost drowned in. These are not the same blue oceans that brought me full circle with my own fears and the goddess.

Lord and Lady, it isn’t Wilde.

My breath catches in my mouth; had it been Wilde at all? What had Laverna and Loki done to me? To us?

“Hello, my beautiful goddess,” Constantine smiles softly at me.