Page 27 of Paint Our Song (Cloverlily #1)

E ven if they said they’d stay in touch, it proves harder than expected since the band’s caught up with different things. They seem to have hashed it out properly because suddenly they’ve got more gigs lined up, their official accounts announce that the band isn’t going to break up, and they’re going to release a new song soon. It’s the song they were working on in the inn, which Miles still hasn’t heard.

Miles should be happy. They’re not breaking up, and that’s a good thing.

During the inn’s weekly bonfire, he stays back in the lobby talking to Calvin instead. There are more people than usual, and it’s been that way for the past week, and Miles is exhausted trying to do the job of at least five different people. Good thing that the new batch of hires is arriving soon.

“We’re doing a podcast next weekend, and it’s going to be streamed live,” Calvin says. Miles can practically hear the stress in his voice. “They always ask the same questions, and all I do is sit around.”

“You could… talk,” Miles says, chuckling.

“No thanks. Are you heading back to the city yet?”

“Sunday. The new staff needs to be trained, but I really need to go back if I don’t want to lose my spot at the gallery.”

“Can I see you soon?”

Miles’s heart soars. He grins to himself, not caring if he looks like a total fool. “Yes, please. Come to my apartment. Or I’ll go to you. I think I’m going through withdrawal from not seeing you.”

Calvin laughs. He loves that sound, all rumbly and soft through the phone. “You’re ridiculous. How’s Monday night? I don’t think we’ve got work that night. What’s your apartment number again? I don’t think you told me last time.”

“Monday’s perfect.” Miles tells him the number.

Shit, he needs to clean his place.

Checking his watch, he sees that the band has about another thirty minutes before they’ll be called onstage. “I’m not holding you up, am I?”

“No, we’re hanging backstage. Chase is watching a sappy rom-com and Gil’s here with his sister. Not really doing much.”

He notes that Calvin doesn’t mention Theo, and he doesn’t bother to ask. “Are you enjoying being back?”

“I am,” Calvin says. “It’s… the crowd’s always overwhelming, and I didn’t realize we’d ever get this big, but I’m grateful. It’s always unreal to see the impact of our music. I’m having a lot of fun. ”

Calvin’s not the most vocal person ever, but at times like this, when he’s open and honest—Miles loves it. He likes listening to Calvin talk about what he enjoys about his job. He also likes listening to the pride he has in their songs, and the effect it has on other people.

A far-off voice that Miles recognizes as Theo’s says, “Having fun onstage isn’t enough, Cal, you need to interact more with the fans.”

Oh, so he was there.

Miles rolls his eyes and keeps himself from not butting in, even if it’s Theo interrupting their conversation like the douchebag he is. Calvin’s silent, and Miles can practically see him retreating into his shell like he often does when it comes to Theo. He knows that Calvin turning quiet because of his ex isn’t because he can’t stand up for himself, but because he’s exhausted himself—either way, Miles hates it.

He likes that Calvin is enjoying himself onstage, he only wishes that Theo stopped being so… Theo. According to Calvin, he’s backed off quite a lot since the band started playing again, but he still has some habits he needs to unlearn.

“Leave him alone, dickwad,” Chase’s also distant voice says. Miles can’t help but snicker at that. “Cal, tell him about that insane fan from yesterday who tried to cut Gil’s hair for some crazy voodoo thing.”

“Probably would have been better if you didn’t offer to help her,” Gil complains, and Chase cackles in response.

** *

Sunday finally arrives and when Miles gets back to his apartment, he cleans it like he told himself he would. He puts clutter away, actually does the laundry, and dusts every inch of the apartment. Exhausted afterward, he falls back on his couch and takes his phone out.

He checks out the posts about Cloverlily’s gig that night. There are already a ton, and their official account has some stories of them on stage. Chase also posted the band backstage. He’s got an arm around Gil, Calvin behind them, and then Theo, with a pie emoji covering his face.

“What the fuck,” Miles wheezes. He hits the heart button, then takes a few extra moments studying Calvin’s face. Calvin’s not wearing his glasses anymore, probably purchased a new pair of contacts once he was back in the city. He likes that Calvin doesn’t wear his glasses so often. It’s as if it’s a little part of him that he only lets some people see—Miles included.

God, he misses Calvin so much. Sue him; he’s needy as hell. After an internal debate that lasts about three seconds, Miles sends him a message.

Me: back in the city!!! see u tomorrow!! Im excited to be back. Not even worried so much about the inn because the new hires did pretty well with their training and it’s taken a load off gabby and mom’s back

Calvin doesn’t reply for hours, which he expected. When he finally does, close to midnight, Miles’s heart sinks.

Cat-vin: Sorry. Need to take a raincheck. The podcast was moved to tomorrow, so that we can hype up the new song’s release.

He reads the message over and over, as if it will magically change, as if Calvin will follow it up saying he’s kidding.

Well, damn.

Miles can’t be too annoyed, not really—he had known this was going to happen the moment the band decided to get back together. They’ve always been busy with back-to-back gigs, interviews, streams, parties, and whatnot.

He texts him it’s fine, then Miles sulks on his couch, swinging his legs over the armrest. He cleaned his entire apartment after driving for two hours for nothing.

His phone rings, and it cuts through the silence of the room. Miles is too out of it to even check who it is. “Hello?”

“Sorry I had to bail on you last minute.” It’s Calvin, and Miles abruptly sits up. There’s a lot of background noise. He must still be outside with the band.

“Is that Miles!?” Chase asks, his voice muffled through the call, as if he’s shouting from across the room.

“No,” Calvin says.

“That’s totally Miles,” says Chase, his voice getting more intelligible and louder.

“Can you not—hey. Stop. Gil!”

There are shuffling sounds, the noise of them struggling, and Calvin cursing under his breath. The next thing Miles hears is Chase’s voice, clear as day, and it’s obvious that he was able to take Calvin’s phone. “Hi, Miles!”

“Hello!”

“So. Tomorrow—the podcast. It’s here at our record label’s building, Triumph Records, down on 23rd. You want to come?”

Calvin grumbles from somewhere in the background, “I was going to ask him myself.”

“Chase, knock it off!” Gil yells. Then there’s more shuffling and fighting. Miles winces when the phone falls on the floor, making a loud resounding thunk.

He hears a door closing, and then silence.

“I’m going to murder that guy one of these days,” Calvin says into the phone.

“Don’t. He’s hilarious.”

Calvin lets out a long exhale. Miles can imagine him—standing there with his eyes closed, recollecting himself. “I honestly don’t know how they booked us for so many things so quickly, like they were all ready to pounce. Tomorrow, before the podcast, we have to do a photo shoot for some magazine. It’s crazy.”

“Nice. Will you be wearing a shirt?”

Calvin ignores him. Typical. There’s a soft puff of air that says he almost laughed. “So, like Chase said… the podcast tomorrow is at our record label’s studio. It’s near your place. You can come, if you’d like. It’ll be nice to see you. These things go for an hour long usually, and you can come here closer to the end, then we can hang out with everyone, and—”

“Yes!” he interrupts, much too eager.

There’s a pause. Calvin says, “I’ll let the front desk know.”

“Sure. Do we, uh… do we need to hang out with everyone all night? I mean, not that I mind. Just curious.” There’s an unspoken question behind it, and he’s sure Calvin understands .

“Oh. Well.”

That doesn’t sound good, and Miles braces himself for the rejection. This is fucking fine, he tells himself. He’s not going to be the guy who demands for time.

“We’re usually out until after midnight because the producers are usually around. I was thinking you can go with us,” Calvin says. “I can try ditching them—”

“No, it’s okay,” Miles quickly says. “I just really want to see you, and I don’t care if it’s with other people.” So much for not being needy. Even he can tell he sounds nuts. “God, I should’ve watched you play tonight.”

“I could have gotten you tickets, if you’d asked.”

“Didn’t want to abuse my privileges.”

“What privileges?” Calvin chuckles. “Are you going to sleep soon?”

What a jarring change of topic. “I will once I put my laundry in the dryer.”

Someone calls Calvin’s name—it sounds like Derrick—and Calvin tells him he needs to go. Holding back a sigh, Miles tells him to take care. The line clicks, and now very aware that he’s again alone in his apartment, there’s a familiar loneliness that twists in his chest.

***

Miles must have dozed off waiting for the washing machine to beep, because he instead wakes up to the sound of his intercom ringing. Grumbling, he saunters over to the door and pokes the green button on the console.

“Who’s this?” he asks, more crossly than he intended.

“Hi,” says Calvin’s voice, followed by a tense chuckle. “Surprise?”

Miles is suddenly very, very awake. “Oh my god?”

“Can I come in?”

He almost says no, just to be funny. After pressing the button on the console that will let him in, Miles rushes to unlock his door to meet Calvin by the elevator. The numbers on top of it rise, and Miles smiles like a dork until it finally opens and Calvin steps out.

“Your apartment’s on the way to the hotel,” Calvin says, shrugging. “And you said you weren’t going to sleep yet—”

Okay, he’s talking way too much.

Miles dives in and kisses him, right in that empty hallway. Nobody’s around and it’s fine, and Calvin’s eyes are wide and he’s breathless when Miles breaks away. Even if Miles keeps doing that—kissing him with no warning—Calvin always has the same endearingly stunned expression every time.

“Come on in,” Miles says, taking him by the hand and leading the way to his apartment. He’s nervous all of a sudden, realizing that this is the first time Calvin’s been here.

“Wow, your place is huge,” Calvin says, when they finally open the door to his home.

Miles doesn’t tell him that it only seems huge because the apartment is too big for one person and because he never bothered to decorate the boring, white walls. The only framed photo he has is the one with Mom and Dad, resting on the top of a mantle in his living room. Aside from that, the only other place that looks like it has human activity is the extra bedroom he’s converted to a studio.

“How many bedrooms?”

“Two. I use one room for my painting, though.”

“A studio? Can I see?”

“Now?”

Calvin gives him a long look as if he finds his question silly. “Yes.”

He leads his way to the studio, which really is like any other room but with a work table, shelves, and a lot of paper found in every corner. There are many boards stacked up against the walls—paintings which Miles finished but didn’t like, and left there to be forgotten. There are also a few paintings framed on the wall—paintings that Miles liked too much to sell. The room has a faint chalky and earthy smell, a mixture of the different papers and paint.

“You do charcoal, too?” Calvin asks. There’s an opened box of charcoal sticks on the table. On the shelf, there are boxes of different paints, not only the usual watercolors he uses. There are different canvases, too. Calvin looks around with so much interest that it makes Miles’s heart thrum.

“I do a bit of… everything? For fun? Watercolor paintings are my forte, though. Are you staying tonight?”

Calvin’s eyes widen, as if he didn’t think that far yet. “I… do you want me to? I stink. I came straight from our gig, and I didn’t bring a change of clothes.”

“Sure,” Miles shrugs. “You can take a shower, if you’d like. And go through my closet. I don’t really care. I’m just happy you’re here.”

“O-okay,” Calvin stammers. “I need to leave early, though. To get ready for that stupid photo shoot. ”

“No worries. I need to go to the gallery before my manager bites my head off, anyway.”

They head to Miles’s bedroom, and Calvin takes some fresh clothes from his closet. He doesn’t miss how Calvin thoughtfully looks around the room. It’s a boring bedroom like the rest of the apartment, apart from the studio. The walls are bare and the curtains are drawn open, showing the empty street outside. Calvin’s eyes flicker to the ball cap from the music festival a few weeks ago, the one he signed.

“What the… you keep this on top of your nightstand?”

Miles grins. “It reminds me of you.”

“Oh my god.” Calvin walks away laughing, disappearing into the bathroom.