Page 16

TO STRUGGLE IS A PRIVILEGE

SERYN

A faint string of cursing flit over the breeze from my left.

Gavrel rolled his eyes to the sky as he pushed his oar into the water behind Breena.

I giggled. “What was that, Bree-Bree?” I called from our rowboat to theirs.

Propelling our boat forward, Rhaegar chuckled behind me as my biceps worked with my paddle.

“As the raven flies,” Breena grumbled loudly. “That’s a bunch of bollocks. There are bloody ravens everywhere!” She threw her hands up in exasperation.

I scanned the sky as I had been all morning, but there were, in fact, no ravens to be found anywhere. And she didn’t mean us or the city of rebels at our backs.

I glanced at the space behind her ear as the wind tossed back her dark strands. Now that I knew it was hidden there, the tiny feather tattoo marking her olive skin was so apparent.

I chewed on my lip, nodding in solidarity. “If nothing else, we’re having a little adventure. Yeah?”

Breena’s shoulders fell. “Right. You always know how to calm me down, Ryn, unlike that knob-shite.” She jerked her head toward Rhaegar.

My smile lingered at her words. She spoke as if she’d already taken the Mirage Orchid tonic.

As if she remembered our friendship that started during the last Dormancy.

The full moon was several weeks away, though.

She and I were both eager for her to use it.

But until then, her vial hid in her and Rhaegar’s hut.

“Woman,” he scolded, “Did you forgo breakfast this morning?”

She scowled. “Yes. What’s it to you?”

I peeked at him. His smile was disarming. “No reason. I’ll gladly be your pin cushion, my friend.”

She sniffed, lifting her chin and jabbing her oar into the swamp water with a splash.

We’d chosen to head to the bog fields, considering that’s where the Augur had found us. My mouth pinched. I vehemently hoped that the Void fog didn’t infect the bog bodies today. I could do without the dead trying to eat me again.

We settled into a comfortable silence, our boats occasionally separating and coming together as we meandered aimlessly. I inhaled, enjoying the salt-tinged breath. Fortunately, the stench of rotten eggs was absent today, and despite the humidity, the damp air no longer bothered me.

My thoughts wandered to Letti. I hoped she was safe. I’d no doubt that Xeni had found her way to my sister. No doubt that Letti could handle herself with Father. He’d always treated her well, so all she had to do was pretend as though her memories were as they always had been.

Erased.

I heaved a sigh, feeling the weight of my responsibility.

To Kaden. To my sister.

To everyone I loved.

To Midst Fall.

“What’s on your mind?” Rhaegar asked, his tone as smooth as the still water ahead of us.

After turning in my seat, I faced him with a sad smile that bent my mouth. “Do you ever feel … heavy? Like you’re drowning with stones tied to your ankles. You know you need to break through the surface, but you’re being pulled down anyway.”

He shook his head. “Well, that sounds positively horrific.” He laid his oar across his lap, scanning the sky as if we had all the time in the world.

His eyebrows drew together, and he bowed his head, running his thumb over the wood.

“But I know the feeling. When my sister Skye was ill, I felt helpless. It didn’t matter that I was just a boy myself.

I tried everything I could to find her more food—more medicine—as did our parents.

But it … it wasn’t enough.” His forlorn gaze met mine.

“It was my responsibility to protect her. And I failed.”

Reaching over, I laid my hand on his for a moment.

I didn’t offer him words because we understood one another perfectly.

Logically, he knew that it wasn’t his fault.

Deep down, I recognized the same. Yet, it was.

We carried the burden of both protecting and fighting for those we loved … at whatever cost.

Even when the price was our soul.

He continued,“I wouldn’t say it gets any easier when you aren’t able to save someone you love.

But time has honed the pain and guilt into a clear purpose.

The realm is dying and doing its very best to take us all with it.

The Elders are to blame in one way or another.

Their laws are self-serving. A means to help them manage the masses. To maintain their power.”

His hands fisted on his oar, conviction rumbling through his chest and through his words.

“We will be the ones to bring them to their knees. To struggle is a privilege the elite will never know. They think fighting for survival is a weakness. But what they don’t understand is that the more we’ve struggled, the more resilient we’ve become. ”

His jaw set in a firm line as he exhaled slowly, looking at the sky once more.

“Like you said, you know … we know we must reach the surface, but the hardest part is discerning which direction to swim. Having stones weigh you down can strengthen you—make you all the more determined to break through. It leaves you in no doubt as to which way is up.”

My eyebrows rose, and a renewed resolve straightened my spine. I glanced at Breena and Gavrel’s boat as it swayed closer. My head slowly bobbed as I met Rhaegar’s dark eyes. “We’ll reach the surface.”

In this moment, I believed it.

“Bloody right we will.”

My belly grumbled, and I grinned. “All this talk of rebellion has worked up my appetite.”

He reached into the small satchel attached to his belt, tossing me a chunk of dried meat, and then took a solid bite out of another piece. “You know how I love sharing food with my kin.”

My smile didn’t leave me as shining ebony streaked overhead, a rattling caw in its wake. As the majestic raven soared to the west, my gaze trailed after it. The sun tinged over its feathers, making the tips look almost blue.

I shared an excited grin with my kin and the others as their rowboat approached. “As the raven flies!” I cried, pure hope floating atop my reinvigorated fortitude.

Gavrel’s mouth twitched but remained in a tight line, pushing his craft to the west. He’d probably reached his limit of Breena’s sparkling personality today.

Good. I smirked at the thought. Struggling made you stronger.

As we followed, the bird weaved through the air, circling and diving as it waited. Thankfully, we skirted the bogs at a distance until we came to a copse of doombarks.

With a scratchy screech, the winged beast dove straight for the center, where the trunks bent inward, creating a triangular archway. There was nothing but a swampy horizon beyond.

“Another adventure?” A wide smile sliced across Breena’s mouth.

“Always,” I agreed, mirroring her expression as we propelled onward.

A dizzying hum of energy clung to me as we neared the entrance. Our skiffs floated through the trees, which were wide enough to allow passage side by side. Breena and I passed through first.

A damp chill washed over my skin as Breena shivered. A soft rush of cherry hues flushed over her. My aura shuddered and flashed over me as well. Looking over my shoulder, a rippling wall of reflective water covered the archway, blocking the men from view and making our boat appear sliced in half.

When the rowboat continued its trajectory, the men shook their heads as if clearing away a fog, runes glowing on their hands.

“Always a delight. Your adventures.” Rhaegar winked at me. I smiled, facing forward as our energies vanished beneath our flesh.

Now, a tunnel of bent, graying boughs stretched several lengths before us. Drooping down, soft, wispy vines twined between the limbs. The raven flew ahead, disappearing as it reached the end and swooped out of sight with a final croak.

Swamp crickets and lapping water serenaded us as we made our way through to the end of the passageway.

As the clouded light seeped over my face, a plethora of twisting doombarks sprinkled outward, interspersed with mossy knolls and flat slabs of rock protruding from the gloomy water.

In the center stood a wooden shack, precariously balanced on thick, crisscrossing poles that creaked under the weight of the structure.

Mixing with the fragrant dampness in the air, a briny breeze brushed against my cheeks.

The weathered planks were adorned with a bright, painted medley of various flora, trees, and animals from all of Midst Fall’s regions.

It was a stark contrast to the milieu cradling it. And the grizzled female rocking in a chair on the deck, observing us with steepled hands.

Gavrel moored our vessel to a tree, and I stepped onto a partially submerged boulder next to it.

As we leaped across the hummocks and stones, my heart thrummed faster, my inhalations shallow. If she helped us find Kaden, and hopefully Mama, all our efforts would be worth it.

With time etched into her joints, the Augur rose slowly, holding her arms out to her sides in greeting. My breath caught. “Hello, child. Come, let’s begin.”

She flicked her hands at the others as they stood their ground by my side. “Go on. This time is for me and the girl.”

Breena examined her nails. “Pass. ”

Gavrel’s body sidled closer, the heat of him brushing against my arm.

The female’s eyebrow quirked, her forehead wrinkles creasing deeper.

I brushed my palm along his biceps as they tensed. “It’s all right. If she wished it so, I’d already be dust.”

The line of his jaw flexed, and he nodded to Rhaegar and Breena.

“Fine, Ryn-Ryn. We’ll go stab one another over there.” Breena drew her dagger and jabbed it toward a patch of hummocks several yards away.

Lifting my chin, I faced the Augur as they went off to spar. She tilted her head, studying me. “Show me.”