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Chapter 45

Aaliyah

B lack shadows circled the floor around us, clinging to my skin, sinking into my bones and over Prince. I called them close, searching in myself for the fractured bits of my soul that held me to him, just like Azer had shown me.

My soul wasn't circling the room, but I could see it when I closed my eyes, the same broken parts of mine hiding in Prince's chest. His soul was just as cracked, black streaks in the red that looked dead. Memories .

I reached for them, soothing each one with shaking hands, forcing them to seal as the press of the Void made me sick. It helped, closing the wounds if only for a second longer. My stomach cramped, the Void demanding more for every bit I held closed, as if pulling on an empty well. A hand landed on my shoulder.

Adrian looked down at me, his eyes worried as he wiped the sweat from my brow, but he didn't try to move me. Not when I shook my head, my hands anchored to Prince.

"There is nothing to be done!" Magelav screamed, panic lacing their words, proving my theory right. "You'll only kill yourself."

My breaths were shaky, clouded with a wheeze. Adrian's hand tightened as a chill filled the air. I knew what death felt like, remembered it well.

Red. He settled over us, a blanket between Prince and I, taking some of the weight off me. The sweat on my neck cooled, and the little parts of him that were Void were easier to grasp than the bits that weren't.

I breathed, turning to Magelav with clear focus, unyielding as I gritted my teeth. The fear in their eyes was a driving force as pressure radiated in my skull, my eyes burning with the need to close them. I managed to get the words out past a cough as the taste of iron flooded my mouth. "You don't care what happens to him . "

A Rend , just out of reach. Magelav strained toward me, frantically pacing when I didn't pull back.

"But I can't die, can I? That ruins your plans, doesn't it?" I asked, ignoring the sharp intake of breath as Adrian let out a choked sound.

"Aaliyah!" Fallon screamed, his voice cracking, body strung tight.

Adrian tugged on my shoulder, and I shook my head again just as Mags snapped.

" Don't! " Magelav screamed, their voice like a gavel as it slammed against the walls, shaking them and me. "If you take her now, you'll rip them both apart. Her soul is keeping him together. One without the other, and death will become them both."

Defeat burrowed in Mags's crazed eyes as a snarl built in their chest. The air filled with the scent of boggy water and burned sand.

"We're tied together. His soul is a part of me now." The shadows stuck to my arms like a black tar, pulsing with the beat of my heart. "You'll save him, or you'll lose me, too."

The threat was a vicious war cry, echoing softly.

"Impossible," Mags tried, seemingly hollow black eyes trying to call my bluff. "His soul, if nothing else, is a burden on yours."

The Void was a living thing, brushing against my wrists and skin, asking me to come and play or slide my way between the cracks of this world and the after . Prince shuddered under me, his eyes rolling back even with my soul stitching his together. Blood pooled in his mouth, his heart stuttering in his chest.

Red strained, and there was a ripple of pain from him that had my control over the cracks slipping.

"Is it? Because I've seen my soul, looked at the cracks that I can't fix, and seen that he was the only thing holding me together. I've died a thousand times," I whispered, my heart sinking as I leaned down and pressed a kiss to his forehead. Thoughts of the others were close to the surface, and I struggled to keep my gaze down as Adrian's hand grew shaky. Fallon heaved breaths hard enough for me to feel, and Eirik's beast hadn't stopped the keening cry that was buried behind a stifling growl. I could be wrong, but the threat was enough. It had to be.

I couldn't let Prince die.

Not again.

"I know what it feels like for my soul to be ready to pass on. I've known death, and I can promise you that if he goes, I will follow, one way or another," I said.

I promised the men I loved many things. Not dying had been at the top of the list. I broke it with those words that I would follow through on if it was the last thing I did. I'd save Prince.

Or I'd die with him.

"You risk much," Mags said, suddenly calm in the way they looked at me, hands flexing as a vacant stare took over their face. "Your mission, your Exilium. You could be wrong ."

"Are you willing to risk the same?" was my only response.

Tense seconds passed, and no one breathed besides Prince, who struggled through his.

"Fine," Magelav finally consented, as their face twisted in unbridled rage. They nearly spit when they spoke next. "Sit him up. Reaper, you need to touch him. One without the other. I hope you're ready to face your demons, too."

I'd expected that, the gaps in my own memory swirling. Eirik helped pull me into a sitting position, my hands staying connected to Prince. Adrian was right there, holding me up as I wobbled, struggling to keep myself upright. I grunted as my hands peeled off Prince, the darkness of the Void pulling away.

I crawled into his lap, anchoring myself to him as his eyes lulled open again.

The others backed away, and I snuck the glance I'd been avoiding. Adrian and Eirik were looking anywhere but me, their faces grim. It was Fallon who caught me off guard, his green eyes so focused on me I nearly flinched.

I'd seen him angry before, like a beast that was preparing to strike. This was something else entirely, something that struck a chord in my chest so sharply the guilt built until it hurt to breathe.

"We'll be talking about this later," he whispered before his eyes finally tipped away.

Dismissed, I deflated, clinging to Prince, keeping him stable as he coughed. He clung to me just as hard as I did to him.

"How do you feel?" Mags asked, and Prince snorted.

"Mags, are you just fucking with me?" he asked.

I gently rubbed his chest as another tremor took over, his entire body tensing as more blood splattered against my shoulder. The cold touch of it sank past my shirt.

"At least your spirits are up. Good, you'll need them. Now drink," Mags said, waving some concoction in front of my face, the rolling potion seeming to swirl even when not touched, glitter glowing in the neon blue depths. They handed the same one to Prince.

"Will this fix it?" I asked, and Mags shrugged.

"Maybe, maybe not. It's all Mags has," they said before sitting back on their heels.

"Tell me you're joking," Fallon bit out, glaring between the three of us.

"You can posture all you like. It's the only option," Mags snapped, turning to stare at the others. I hadn't realized before how close Eirik, Adrian, and Fallon were hovering. "How about you make yourselves useful and get what I need?"

Mags rattled off a few ingredients, the others watching hesitantly before shooting off to do as they had bid.

Mags stood, looking at us expectantly. "Drink, or Mags leave."

Prince's arms tightened around me, and I curled into his cool body, my voice steady against his neck. "Don't you have to wait for them to get back?"

"No. Wanted them gone. Too loud, breaking my concentration. They'll become beasts when you start screaming."

The idea of my memories was enough to get me there already. I clung to the scars that I had, the ones that I knew.

The ones that I didn't.

There were so many, so many years trapped in that glass cell, so many leers and prods. So many doctors. Bile slid up my throat, and I curled tighter around Prince.

"Hey, look at me," Prince said, pulling back just enough to catch my eyes. "I'm right here, Aaliyah."

I shivered, looking from him to the glass in my hand.

"I'm scared, Prince," I admitted after a long moment. Mags scoffed, and Prince flashed his teeth at them, furious that they thought they had the right to judge. "Ascension destroyed me. I don't know if I can handle seeing it all. Not again."

His breath skipped, and I saw the way he shut down his own pain when he cupped my cheek. I focused on the brush of his hand and the soft press of bloodied lips against my own.

"You're never alone again, Aaliyah. Your demons have always been my demons. We face them together, okay?" he said, pressing his forehead into mine. "Be scared, terrified, but never let go of me. No matter what happens, we walk out of this."

I laughed, a broken sound, but sank against him regardless. I kept my eyes closed as our cheeks pressed together, and I chose to hope that the wetness was from the blood and not the tears I knew I'd shed.

"I love you." I choked on the words, but I didn't pull away as I tipped my head back and downed the glass Mags had given us in one drink. I set it next to me, watching as Prince lifted it to his lips and did the same.

The effect was immediate, like a shot straight to the heart. Adrenaline flooded, and I sucked in a hard breath.

"I love you, too, Aaliyah," he said, pressing our foreheads back together, his hand coming to my chest above my heart, pinky and ring finger down. "Forever."

I expected the Rend , had been prepared for it, but this was so much different from what I'd grown used to. I snapped out of myself, hitting a silver room with a horrid breath. Only it wasn't endless like I was expecting, instead fissured and cracked. The black sky and flickering stars morphed and distorted, boxing in the room of silver. In it, was my soul .

Every broken piece of it, watching on as one of the shadowed bits hurtled toward me. It slammed into my chest, throwing me back, out of the room. Darkness embraced me as the memory hit, bits of a doctor I couldn't name and the cracking of a bone I felt viscerally.

One by one, they came fluttering back, the room that housed my soul like their playground. A lifetime of surviving, of barely existing.

A lifetime of scars, and then another, and another.

Until one life faded into the next, and I realized how right Azer had been, how right Davi had been. I'd lived so many lifetimes stuck in a cage, so many years trapped behind glass walls enduring cruel taunts from guards and doctors whose faces and names had long since been lost to me. I hadn't just been alive longer than I thought … I'd been at Ascension for years. Decades.

Lifetimes .

And there was no escaping them now.