Page 17 of Murder & Mayhem (Bloody Desires #9)

I was probably crossing a thousand lines by washing him.

Jamie had only asked for me to stay with him, not this.

But he hadn’t asked me to stop or given any hint of discomfort, so I gave in to my impulse and continued to wash him.

The situation wasn’t sexual at all. Jamie was completely soft, and that was enough to keep me from chubbing up completely.

I washed his back, again more thoroughly than was necessary, before moving lower. I went to my knees behind him, and I noticed Jamie tense a fraction. I knee-walked back a few steps, leaving as much space as I could manage.

“If you want me to stop, all you gotta do is say the words, Jamie. I won’t do anything you don’t want. Even this.”

Jamie’s breath hitched and a shiver ran under his skin despite the warm water. “Don’t stop.”

I bit my lip hard so hard I was lucky it didn’t bleed.

I wanted to taste him, lick a trail down his thighs, kiss every single one of those scars, and a thousand other inappropriate things.

My underwear clung to my skin, and I was glad Jamie wasn’t facing me.

I might not have a boner, but I was more of a shower than a grower, and you could see just about everything now, despite the fabric.

I added more shower gel and carefully washed his lower half.

Maybe I was a saint after all because I managed not to get hard, even with the little moans and fucking sounds Jamie kept making.

“Turn around, beautiful.”

His breathing was harsh and rapid, but he did. Since I was already on my knees, with my head down, I started on his legs. When I got to his cock, I hesitated. Finally, I forced my eyes up and looked at Jamie and waited for permission.

His pupils were dilated, lips parted, his body rocking slightly.

“Please,” he said, barely above a whisper.

I lathered my hand and cleaned his still flaccid cock. Little white lines covered the length and on his balls. I gritted my teeth. The fucker was already dead. I couldn’t make Joey Byrne more dead, no matter how much I wished it. Getting angry would only upset Jamie .

I had questions that I managed not to ask.

I kind of assumed Jamie was gay, or at least not heterosexual, but now I was having doubts.

Though, I knew plenty of men who would swear that they were heterosexual and would still be getting hard if another man cleaned his cock and balls while his face was even with said cock.

But Jamie wasn’t at all. He seemed to be enjoying himself, but maybe I was reading this situation all wrong.

I finished quickly, careful not to linger for even a second before standing to wash his chest.

The scarring there was even worse than his legs and back.

If I didn’t know better, I would’ve thought Sabretooth had gotten hold of him.

Four long gashes spread across his pecs and through his left nipple, leaving it mangled, down to his side.

They weren’t the only ones, but they were certainly the most prominent.

My fingers traced across them, possibly too long because Jamie was suddenly blinking out of his half trance and stepping back.

“Let me wash you,” he hurried. “This shower is fucking amazing by the way.” He was rambling, deflecting, and I hated it. He was clearly uncomfortable with the scars, even more so than the rest of his body, or maybe he was coherent enough now to be bothered. “How is it still warm?”

I gave him a lopsided smile and took another step back, giving him the space he needed. “I spent a small fucking fortune on the water tank. Worth every damn penny though.”

Jamie licked his lips. “Yeah, for sure. Never been in a shower that the water stayed hot for longer than 5 minutes, and hot is being generous.”

“I remember those days. I was in one foster home before I met Gid and Ari that only let us use hot water as a reward. Everyone else had to share, two at a time, an ice-cold shower. We’d be punished if we took longer than five minutes, too.

After that, once I was old enough and had the money, I became bougie as fuck about that kinda stuff. ”

Jamie looked thoughtful. “I guess that’s one good thing I could say about Joey. He never did that.”

I hummed noncommittally. I wasn’t really in the mood to say anything positive about the fucker, but I wouldn’t negate whatever Jamie said.

After a beat, I started to wash myself. Even though he had mentioned doing it before, he made no effort once I started, and I would never ask.

He was watching me though, his eyes hot and heavy as I quickly cleaned up, way quicker than I’d done Jamie.

Once I was finished, I shut off the water and opened the door.

I grabbed a white, fluffy towel for Jamie off the rack.

They weren’t warm, the towel warmer was more Ari’s thing, but they were soft as fuck.

I wrapped it around him as he stepped out, drying him a bit before tightening it around his waist. Jamie didn’t say a word about being able to do it himself.

When he turned his back to me, I ditched my soaking wet boxers and wrapped a towel around me.

The air was thick with tension, both of us. . . waiting. For what, I really wasn’t sure.

“I never got us clothes,” I realized. “Wait here, I’ll be right back.”

Somehow, standing here with both of us wrapped in towels felt more intimate than the shower.

I needed to get out of the room and breathe fresh air that wasn’t saturated with Jamie’s scent.

Which was really only mine, since I used the same products for both of us, but I somehow could tell the difference.

His eyes never left me. I could feel him staring even with my back turned. I managed to ignore it, putting all my focus on finding a pair of gray sweats for me and clothes that could fit Jamie.

No underwear, but Ari had left a pair of joggers and a long- sleeved Carhartt T-shirt here last time he’d spent the night, so I grabbed them for Jamie and brought them back to him.

He was sitting on the counter, still in his towel, picking at a scab on the palm of his hand.

He looked up when I walked in and stole my fucking breath away.

His hair was a little darker when wet and had a bit of a wave to it.

It fell into his eyes, and he tossed his head to push it back.

His legs were spread enough that there was a gap in his towel, and I had placed it low enough that I got a good glimpse of nearly blond curls above his groin.

My cock, which had amazingly cooperated through the whole torturous shower, suddenly forgot its place and twitched, thickening slightly.

Which it had no fucking business doing, especially in the thin sweatpants I’d put on without underwear.

Probably not my best decision, but I hadn’t been thinking clearly. Fuck.

Smiling, I placed the clothes on the counter next to him. “These should fit you. Do you want me to bandage your hand?”

Jamie shook his head and held his arm up to me. The scratches on his wrist looked rough, but there were no large gashes or open wounds. “Nah, it’s fine. Thanks.”

I swallowed so I wouldn’t argue before jerking my head toward the vanity. “There are new toothbrushes under the sink, and anything else you might need. I’ll leave you to it.”

I quickly left and closed the bathroom door before he could stop me again.