Page 45 of Moonlight & Matrimony (Oak Ridge #2)

Hidden away in the guest cabin, my mind begins replaying every possible mistake I might’ve made in this life — or a past one — that could have led to a lifetime of misfortune.

I don’t know how long I stay like that, sitting on the floor wrapped in one of Luca’s hoodies, knees tucked to my chest with my back against the sofa as I try to quell the building ache in my chest, but I come back to myself when I sense Luca’s return.

“Ivy?” Luca’s steady presence surrounds me as he steps into the small living space, his familiar scent enveloping me in a comforting embrace.

“Russell wanted to know if we’d like to join them up at the main house for dinner.

He said to tell you that Griffin and Jaxon are grilling.

He seemed to think that was going to be a deciding factor.

” Something like jealousy flashes on his face, but it’s quickly replaced by a quizzical expression.

For a few years after mom died, Griff and Jax were like the big brothers I never knew I needed.

Wilder is the oldest son, but he married and moved away before Evelyn unofficially adopted me.

Then there’s Ruby, the baby sister and country music darling.

She and I didn’t interact much, though we were the same age.

I hung out with a different crowd at school.

Where she was the popular girl with the heart of gold and talent beyond her years, I was the girl who would fight at the drop of a hat, just treading water, trying to stay afloat.

Later, when I should’ve been clinging to the stability offered by the Hayes family, I chose to give my heart to a man who would eventually tear it to shreds. When I met Austin at 17, I put this beautiful family in my rearview, thrusting myself into a life I was unprepared to face.

Luca waits for my response as I debate whether or not I’m ready to let them see this broken version of me. Realizing I don’t have anything left to lose, I agree. “I’ll just get cleaned up and we can head out.”

“Are you okay, sweetheart? I know the last 24 hours have been… a lot.” He sighs and scrubs a hand over his beard before continuing. “I understand if you’d rather stay in. I can go back and tell them you aren’t up for it.”

“No, that’s okay. I want to see them and I think it would be good to get my mind off of things for a little while.”

Luca nods and holds out a hand to help me stand. “I’ll wait for you on the porch,” he says.

“Joey!” Griff wraps me in a bear hug, lifting and spinning me in a circle.

I haven’t heard that nickname in ages, and a pang of guilt washes over me for having avoided them for years.

Griff and Jax both work on the ranch, and they keep pretty busy.

Over the years, we’ve waved at each other from a distance, saying the occasional hello here and there.

But nothing was ever the same after I moved in with Austin.

I wish I could blame him entirely for my isolation, but the truth is, in those early days, it was my own doing.

I knew if I let them in, they would try to talk me out of staying with him, and I couldn’t see the forest for the trees.

Evelyn has helped me come to terms with my role in my withdrawal from their family and the subsequent isolation caused by Austin’s abuse, and she’s been encouraging me to try to reconnect, but I wasn’t ready. Standing here now, awash with regret, I wish I had reached out sooner.

“Put me down, you big oaf!” I pound on his chest with my ineffectual fists, and he chuckles. As he sets me back on my feet, his demeanor changes to something more stoic. “We missed you, Ivy Jo.”

Griff’s bulky frame towers over me, and if I had to guess, I’d say he’s at least 6’4”.

His dark wavy hair is pulled up in a knot, deep blue eyes contrasted against his tan skin, and his angular jaw is covered in a layer of dark scruff.

He’s definitely what you’d call a big boy, in a black henley and a pair of dark wash jeans, tattoos peeking out beneath his rolled up sleeves.

Tears threaten to spill as Griff passes me over to Jax, who pulls off his signature black cowboy hat to wrap his arm around my shoulders, cupping the back of my head.

His hug is laced with an undertone of concern.

I have no idea how much they know about my life with Austin or the subsequent fallout once I left, but I suspect they know enough to want to commit crimes on my behalf.

“You good?” Jax asks with a dangerous edge to his voice, pulling back to study my reaction.

“I’m good,” I nod, keeping my expression apathetic.

Jax is a good three inches shorter than his brother, with closely cropped light brown hair and kind green eyes that look just like his mom’s.

Ever the cowboy, he’s dressed in a pair of worn wranglers and boots, with a navy plaid button down straining against his muscled torso.

Not exactly the lanky teenager who used to chase me around the yard with the water hose.

The years have been kind to the Hayes brothers.

I glance over at Luca, noticing the strain in his features. “Griff, Jax — this is my husband, Luca.”

Griffin is the first to reach out for a handshake. “Thanks for taking care of our little sister,” he says, emphasizing our lack of a romantic connection for Luca’s benefit, no doubt. Luca’s expression changes to acceptance as he shakes Griffin’s hand, then offers the same to Jaxon.

“Uncle Griff!” Rylin comes barrelling around the corner of the chicken coop, a fluffy white silkie chicken hot on her heels. She leaps into his arms and he catches her.

“How’s my best girl?” he asks.

“Did you meet my Luca?” she asks, and my heart soars at the claim.

“I did! Are you ready for dinner?”

Rylin contemplates for a moment, tapping her finger against her chin. “Did you make hotdogs?” she asks, preparing to negotiate depending on the answer.

“Sure did! You didn’t think we’d forget, did you?” Rylin squeals and hugs him tightly around the neck. “You’re the bestest!”

I may have kept my distance from the Hayes brothers over the years, but I know they’ve had a big hand in taking care of my girl when Evelyn has her at the ranch. They love her like one of their own, and it’s just another reason I’m grateful for this family.

Luca

I’m not too proud to admit that I’m a jealous motherfucker, and damn, did I want to pull Ivy into my arms the minute Griff and Jax passed her around like a condiment.

Logically, I know they don’t see her that way, but it still grates.

I keep reminding myself she’s not mine to claim.

So why the fuck does she feel like she is?

“How did you end up in Oak Ridge, of all places?” Jax asks as he passes the potato salad to his dad. We’re all seated around a large farmhouse table on the back patio, the smell of barbecue filling the air. Rylin is tucked in between me and Ivy on a long bench seat, hot dog in hand.

“Have you met Paige?” I ask around a bite of the most delicious pulled pork I’ve ever tasted.

“Cade’s girl?” Jax asks.

I nod. “She’s my sister. After she moved here, and I saw how much she loved this town, I wanted to see what all the fuss was about. I got a job working for Barlow Construction, moved down a few months back, and that’s when I met Ivy.”

“And what exactly are your intentions with our Joey girl?” Griff asks.

“I think it’s a little late for the ‘if you hurt her, we’ll kill you’ speech, Griff,” Ivy points out. “Luca’s already locked it down.” Russell and Evelyn share a knowing smirk as Ivy holds up her left hand with the antique ring circling her finger, all but branding her as mine.

“Never too late,” Jax says. “Just know we have a backhoe and I won’t hesitate to dig a hole out in the pasture if you give me a reason.”

“Or there’s always the pigs,” Griffin adds.

“Noted,” I chuckle. “I have no intention of hurting her.” Keeping my tone decisive, I add, “I only want to keep her safe.” They nod in understanding, and the conversation drifts into more Rylin friendly territory.

After dinner, the brothers make Ivy promise to ride out to the pasture with them this week, and we drive back to our guest cabin with a very sleepy kid in tow.

The cabin is beautiful, but small It’s exactly what you’d expect from a cabin on a ranch — rustic natural wood panelling, open concept living area with a modest kitchen and one bedroom.

There's only one large bed, but Rylin didn’t want to spend another night away from her mom, so I offered to take the couch.

After we get Ry tucked into the middle with Chance curled up beside her, Ivy disappears into the small ensuite bathroom with Hazel hot on her heels.

Apparently, privacy goes completely out the window when you have a kid, two cats, and a dog.

I take a seat at the foot of the bed, not wanting to leave Rylin alone just yet.

If I’m being honest, I miss her when she’s not at home.

I suppose we’ll be making up for that now that we’re living out at the ranch for the foreseeable future.

I called a cleanup company to take care of the smoke damage on the main floor, and they estimated 7-10 business days for completion.

Miles insisted I take a paid leave of absence while the arson investigation is ongoing.

I didn’t argue; I couldn’t leave Ivy and Rylin even if I wanted to.

There’s an innate need to protect them that’s making me want to cling to them and never let go.

“Luca? Are we safe?” Rylin asks through a yawn.

Her innocent inquisition is more complicated than she realizes, and I’m not sure how to respond, so I slide up beside her, leaning back against the headboard as I take her little hand in mine.

The bathroom door creaks open and I glance over at Ivy standing on the threshold, watching me with a sullen expression.

“I’ll keep you safe, Bug. I promise.”

“Mommy, too?”

“Always.”

“I’m going to take Sage outside,” Ivy says, a slight hitch in her voice. “Be right back, okay, love? Stay with Luca.”

Rylin shifts into my lap, wrapping her arms around my neck. She tucks her curly head under my chin, her eyes closing on a sigh. My heart leaps out of my chest as I soak in her warmth, and in that moment, I vow to go to the ends of the earth to make sure she feels safe and loved every single day.

Ivy returns a few minutes later to find Rylin fast asleep on my chest, her quiet snores filling the room. “Do you want me to take her?” she asks.

“No. I’ve got her. Just get in.” I free one arm to grasp the comforter and pull it back for Ivy to slide underneath.

She pulls a blanket off the chair in the corner, tucking it around Rylin and me before she finally sinks down beside us, turning on her side to face me, one hand resting under her cheek.

“Thank you,” she murmurs, tucking a wayward curl behind Rylin’s ear.

“Sometimes I wish…” her voice trails off as her eyes grow mournful. Say it.

“What do you wish, Ivy?”

“I wish she was yours.” Her voice is barely above a whisper, but the words simultaneously steal my breath and fortify my resolve.

“She is, Ivy. In every way that counts. She’s mine to protect, mine to care for, mine to love.” And you are, too. But I don’t dare say it out loud.

“Please don’t make promises you can’t keep.”

As the words hang in the air, my chest tightens with a mix of guilt and longing, a painful reminder of the promises I made to myself — solemn vows that now seem fragile and hollow.

I’m caught between the fear of falling for them, and the overwhelming desire to become the man who could break through the walls Ivy has built around her heart.

She doesn’t speak again, letting sleep take her, and freeing me from the burden of laying myself bare.