Page 26 of Miracles and Marriage (Making a Family #5)

Two weeks later Zoe woke feeling achy. She had avoided Cal as much as possible without causing comment over the last few days.

True to her word, she’d worked on the project for renovating the Richmond house and by the Thursday after they’d returned from Richmond had presented Cal with a printout of all her notes and recommendations.

When he’d asked her about contacting painters and carpenters, she’d pleaded a heavy workload and asked if Emily could handle that.

She didn’t want to invest herself in a project she might not even see to completion.

Today, that seemed wise. Feeling slightly depressed, she rose and debated going to work. Her period was scheduled to start tomorrow and she already felt some of the cramping that was sure to accompany it.

She was not pregnant.

And she wasn’t going to continue in the futile effort.

Her doctor had told her it might prove difficult if not impossible to conceive. Why not give in to the inevitable and schedule the operation? The pain caused incapacity each month wasn’t going to go away. It could get worse.

She needed to tell Cal. Zoe knew he ‘d try to talk her out of it. He was tenacious in his pursuit of objectives—at least at work. And she knew he grieved at the loss of the other baby.

He needed a woman who could give him lots of love and lots of children. She only counted in one aspect.

He’d put up a fuss, but this was the wise decision. He never stayed with any woman long, so before she knew it, he’d find someone else. Maybe to have a family with or maybe to squire around to social events as he’d been doing all the years she’d known him.

At least no one else but Chloe and Gabe knew the full story. She must have known deep inside that it would end this way. That’s why she’d been so insistent no one knew about the marriage or the baby quest.

Once the marriage ended, they’d go on as they had before. Or if it became too painful to see him with another woman, Zoe knew she could find a job with another security firm.

Only, deep down she didn’t want to change a thing.

She wanted to share a child with Cal, watch it grow, develop.

See her parents as doting grandparents, her sisters and brothers as extended family the child would love through the years.

Have their son or daughter play with cousins, share in family holidays and birthdays.

And spend summers in carefree fun at the seashore.

And she wanted Cal with her every step of the way.

By the time she finished her hot chocolate, her mind was made up. She was calling in the vacation time she was owed. She’d go to the sea. Any comfort would be found there.

Calling Chloe, she told her where she was going.

“Honestly, girl, you go there more in winter than summer,” her twin said.

“Best time, quiet, no people around. Beside, I want to be by myself for a while.”

“Burning the candle at both ends?”

“No. Some thinking to do.”

“About?” Chloe sounded cautious.

“About ending this farce of a marriage and scheduling the operation.”

“What are you talking about? You have hardly given yourself a fair chance at getting pregnant.”

“It’s complicated.”

Chloe was quiet for a moment.

“You’ve fallen for Cal, haven’t you? He’s so blind. Tell him.”

“That is the last thing he wants. He only agreed to help me because I wanted it so much.”

And because of his lost baby and his uncle’s death. But Zoe wasn’t sharing Cal’s private business even with her sister.

“I’ll go with you.”

“I don’t need handholding.”

Then suddenly she wanted her sister to go. Maybe talking things through would help.

“Pick me up when you leave,” Chloe said.

“Around ten,” Zoe said.

For the first time since she’d made her decision, she felt like the future might not be impossible to live through.

She packed a few things. Called the office to let her supervisor know she was taking off for a few days. She debated not calling Cal, but remembered the last time she’d tried to dodge him.

He answered after one ring.

“Callahan.”

“Cal.” Zoe kept her tone light though her throat ached with tears. “I’m taking off for a few days. Chloe and I are heading for the beach—where else?”

“Anything wrong?”

“No.” She took a breath. “Just some girl time. I’ll call you when I get back.”

“I’m glad you called. I have a last minute meeting scheduled in San Francisco. I’ll be gone for a couple of days but back by Sunday. I’ll come by your place on my way home.”

She started to argue, but didn’t.

“Fine.”

He’d find out Sunday night that she wasn’t home. And he’d be too tired after his trip to hunt her up at the cottage.

“Have a good trip, new business, I hope and not a crisis.”

“New business.”

Cal often presented the strategy for security to new clients, depending on the complexity of the assignment.

“Always good to hear. Have a great flight.”

She hung up and burst into tears. She hated the way her life was going.

“It’s freezing here,” Chloe said, opening the door to the cottage shortly after lunch. They’d stopped in Waterford for a quick meal. After which they paid a brief visit to the local grocery store.

“The heater works fine. There’s nothing better than curling up in one of grandma’s old quilts on the porch and letting the cold breeze try to get to you,” Zoe said as she deposited her bags of food on the counter.

“Yes, there is—warm summer evenings with a balmy breeze to cool you down and a crab feed in progress.”

Chloe put her own grocery bag down and rubbed her hands together while Zoe went to turn on the furnace.

“You’re such a fair weather gal,” she said.

“You bet.”

“I appreciate Gabe being okay for you to come for a few days.”

“That’s the third time you’ve said that. He was fine with it.”

Zoe glanced at her sister. Was there something in her tone? Maybe she was annoying her with her gratitude, but she did appreciate it. Not every husband was happy to have his wife take off for several days on a moment’s notice.

“Let’s get this place warm and start dinner. I love the smell of spaghetti sauce simmering all day,” Chloe said, already putting away the supplies they’d purchased.

Soon it was warm enough to take off their coats. Once settled in, they began to make their grandmother’s sauce. The pot was soon giving off tantalizing aromas.

“So tell me all,” Chloe said as she settled in one of the comfortable chairs in the main room.

Zoe sat on the sofa.

“It’s a dumb idea. I left it too late. There’s no guarantee that I can get pregnant. Dr. Wright tried to tell me that. She was honest when she said it’d be very unlikely.”

“But you haven’t tried for long. Maybe another couple of months.”

“No.”

“Because of Cal?”

“Because of how much I am falling in love with him. He’s more than the man I thought I knew at the office.

Whenever we spend time together, I learn new things and admire him.

Plus the physical attraction grows each time we get near each other.

I have a hard time keeping from throwing myself at him whenever he’s in the same room. ”

“And he’d object?”

“Duh. We didn’t marry for love like you and Gabe. The whole reason we kept quiet was just for this result.”

“What do you mean—you planned this from the beginning?” Chloe asked in surprise.

“I didn’t plan it precisely, but I think deep inside I knew it’d end like this. I didn’t want people blaming him for our divorce, so if no one knew we were married, no one could.”

“Does he want a divorce?”

“I’m not keeping a man tied to me when we can’t have children. That’s not fair.”

“Adopt.”

Zoe shrugged.

“Maybe, someday. But I can do that on my own. I don’t need Cal for that. And he deserves his own kids. He’s the last of his family since his uncle died. Don’t you think he wants his own flesh and blood?”

“I’m surprised he wants kids at all. Gabe doesn’t,” Chloe said.

“You didn’t either. Have you changed your mind?”

“Not really. I don’t know. Your solution has me thinking. What if I did change my mind? Maybe I have what you have and can’t get pregnant.”

“No, you’d know it. And if you start getting symptoms, you’d have time to act. I left it too late. Still, I like my job. I love my nieces and nephews. I can make that work.”

“Don’t give up yet.”

Zoe looked at Chloe.

“I have to.”

Cal arrived back in Washington at five o’clock on Sunday afternoon.

The presentation had gone well, even though it’d been so rushed.

Not a crisis on the part of Protection, Inc.

, but certainly one on the side of his new client.

He was satisfied the company could handle the situation without a problem.

He drove to Zoe’s apartment. He thought about calling her, but didn’t know what she and her sister might be doing. He was surprised at how much he wanted to see her.

Knocking on her door a little later he waited impatiently for her to open. Maybe he should have brought some flowers or something.

The thought knocked him for a loop. What was this, some kind of courtship? They were already married. And trying for a baby. He didn’t need to bring flowers to see her. Though maybe he’d suggest they go out to eat. No sense in her preparing a meal for two on short notice.

There was no bright welcome. There was no sound from her apartment at all.

He knocked again. Waited.

Flipping open his phone, he dialed her cell.

“Zoe’s phone,” Chloe said.

“Is she there? This is Cal.”

“She’s in bed, cramps.”

“Oh.”

He leaned against the wall. A wave of disappointment swept through him. He’d hoped she’d become pregnant. Why was it if a man wasn’t careful, one slip could end up with a baby. Yet they’d been trying for weeks and nothing.

“How’s she doing?” he asked.

“Not as bad as some times. I’ll tell her you called when she wakes up.”

“I’ll come out.”

“Don’t. She’s not feeling up to it and I don’t want to have to entertain you and take care of her at the same time.”

“You don’t have to do either. I can take care of my wife.”

“We’re doing fine here, Cal. She’ll call you.”

With that, Chloe hung up.