Page 19

Kaz

HE HAD an arm around Miles, the man’s head on his chest, and if he could, he would stop time so that the moment never ended because he’d never been happier. He couldn’t pinpoint a single thing that caused it. It was just all of Miles. It was all of them.

He felt something in his chest. Something big and loud. Fear most likely.

Fear of losing this. Of losing Miles.

When he’d told Miles he didn’t know what they were doing, he’d been more right than he’d thought, because this?

Lying in bed with Miles? Listening to his breathing?

Trailing his fingertips up and down Miles’s arm?

He’d never once wanted that before. He’d never stuck around long enough after a fuck.

Hell, he’d never wanted to stick around.

Now? Someone would have to threaten him with bodily harm to get him away from Miles and, even then, he might still stay.

The fear was digging its claws in deeper and deeper because how was he supposed to keep Miles?

How could he ever live up to whatever expectations Miles had?

He wasn’t worth Miles’s time. He didn’t have much to offer except great sex, and he knew Miles well enough to know that sex was only part of what Miles wanted. Even if Miles had never said as much.

The things he did have to offer consisted of childhood trauma, a bad attitude, and a serious penchant for trouble. Not exactly the makings of a great catch.

He drew in a deep breath and squeezed his eyes shut in an attempt to chase away the insecurities and fear. It didn’t matter how many times people told him he was worth something because he’d heard enough times that he wasn’t worth shit to believe it.

Fingertips running down his chest had him sucking in a breath, his focus snapping back to the man in his arms. Miles was drawing shapes across Kaz’s chest, a small smile on his lips.

“It’s my birthday next weekend.”

Miles turned his head, brown eyes looking up at him with something soft and warm that he wanted to fucking bottle and keep locked up only for him to see. He wanted Miles all to himself, even if the thought scared the shit out of him.

“I know,” Miles said.

A smug smile spread on his lips. “You know? ”

Miles rolled his eyes and put his cheek back against Kaz’s chest, his confirming hum vibrating against him. He slid a hand into Miles’s hair, smiling down at him.

“You remember my birthday?”

“Shut up,” Miles mumbled.

That pleasant warmth spreading in his chest? He had a feeling it was happiness. Maybe something more. It made the fear rise up again, but he shoved it down and forced the words out.

“I want you to come.”

Miles huffed. “Just did.”

He grabbed a handful of Miles’s hair to tug on it. Miles opened his eyes and tilted his head back to meet Kaz’s gaze.

“I want you to come to my birthday party.”

“Really?”

“Yeah.” He pretended not to hear the croaking sound in his voice.

Miles’s lips were on his the next second and he trailed a hand down Miles’s bare back, following the curve of his spine until he reached that delectable ass.

He rolled them until Miles was under him and braced his hands on the bed to hold himself over Miles.

Looking down at him, seeing Miles’s smile and that affectionate look in his eyes, he felt a sense of doom settling over him because he knew he’d done nothing to deserve it.

All he’d done was hurt Miles. Taunt him.

Push him until he got physical. He sure as fuck didn’t deserve Miles, but he was just selfish enough to keep him.

At least for a little while. Until Miles wizened up and left him like everyone else.

He decided to make the most of the time they had, so he lowered his head, catching Miles’s lips in a slow kiss, teasing his lips open for his tongue to surge into his mouth and claim him.

And then he claimed his body, over and over, until Miles could take no more, and then he let Miles claim him instead.