Page 58 of Meant to Be

JOSIE

When Nick called this morning, inviting me to spend the day with him and a few others at the quarry, I expected to be thrilled. But instead, I’ve been trying to think of excuses not to go.

I’m now dressed, waiting for him to pick me up, having convinced myself this is what I’m staying in Fern Grove for. Nick. I’m doing things right this time.Nickis right.

I’m clad in a white bikini top, and a high-waisted denim skirt, with my towel slung over my arm. My sunglasses rest on the bridge of my nose as I lean on the kitchen bench, waiting for Nick’s truck to appear in the slim opening of my window.

When it does, I gather everything I need and slip out the door. It bangs shut behind me.

I feel a little nauseated when I see John and Eric in the car. My old friends. I automatically look to the front, expecting to see Elise. Instead, a girl with round, brown eyes and dark freckles sits in Elise’s old seat, an innocent but kind smile on her face.

“Oh my God!” John bursts, tearing out of the car. He wraps his arms around me and lifts me off my feet. We spin around until I’m dizzy. I let out a laugh, slapping his shoulder gently.

“I’m going to throw up on you!”

John places me down, grinning. “Jesus, Josephine. You scrub up all right. Look at you!”

“It’s just Josie, but thanks! You look great yourself, John,” I say and mean it.

Eric, who has always been the tamer of the two, strolls around the car, his long arms dangling by his sides. I do a double-take when I see his face. Dark circles coat his under eyes, and his midnight-black hair looks oily and unbrushed. He’s ghostly pale, much more so than I remember him being as if he is recovering from some sort of illness.

His eyes … his eyes tell me all I need to know. It’s not an illness that plagues him. It’s guilt. I understand because I’ve had a similar look in my eyes since everything went down.

“Eric,” I greet him, almost awkwardly. I want to ask him how he is, but I don’t. We hug instead, and his hug feels lifeless compared to John’s.

“Missed seeing you around here,” he says. “How’ve you been?”

“Good!” I chirp, ignoring the brutal truth of my life and acting as though leaving was the best thing to ever happen to me. “I’m totally cultured and wiser now.”

He finally cracks a smile. “Good to hear.”

I throw my arm into the car and give Nick’s shoulder a quick squeeze before piling into the car with the others.

“Hi, Josephine!” the girl greets me. For a moment, I’d completely forgotten about someone else being here. “Shannon! Remember me?”

“Oh, sure. Hi, Shannon. And everyone, please, it’s just Josie,” I answer, even though I don’t really remember who she is. She must be younger than us. John reaches forward, touching her arm.

Despite everything, it seems traitorous to have someone else here instead of Elise. I can’t help but turn my head to look at Eric. Thoughts run circles in my mind, thinking about how hard Eric’s life must be after everything.

Shannon talks a lot. Too much, too loudly, and her words string together as one as she hardly draws a breath. John and Nick laugh and talk along with her, while Eric and I stare out the windows. The last time we were all together in this car, we were different people. I wish we could go back and rewrite history.

There are a few cars parked across the grass at the quarry when we arrive. I feel a nervous sensation of tingles on my skin when I recognise Harley’s dark black truck amongst them.

I throw my towel down and kick off my shoes. My eyes roam over the clear, turquoise water. The sun is unrelenting as it beats down on me.

My eyes pause when I notice Belle and Brennon perched side by side on a couple of towels close to us. They narrow when I see Harley and Jess there too. Are they a thing now, since she lost her chance with Nick? My hands curl at my sides for no valid reason. A good girl like Jess wouldhatea boy like Harley. I’m baffled she is even seen within a metre of him, let alonehanging out. Is there any part of my life that girl doesn’t want?

“You okay, Josie?” Shannon asks me.

“Yes,” I say a little rudely as I tear my eyes from the group.

“Josie!”

Belle’s voice is like a foghorn over the glade, and everyone in the radius of us turns their heads to stare.

Belle leaps to her feet and bounds over to me.

“Hey, girl! What are you doing here?” she asks.