Page 4 of Maverick (The Bull Riders #3)

I wouldn’t know because the one time I kissed a guy it was in the back of the barn at my parents’ property and he was sweaty and not in a sexy way, and I pushed him away because I was sixteen and he was twenty – so many problematic horse guys roaming around us all the time – and if it had engaged my impulsive side at the time, I’d have probably dragged him right into the tack room and let him take my virginity.

But my head was somewhere else.

Now it’s there.

I can’t get it out of my head.

I move away from him. Quickly.

I need to save myself.

“I’ll see you at poker,” I say.

He shrugs. “When I get around to it.”

He throws his cigarette onto the ground and grinds it beneath his boot. He takes his time moving away from me, as he prowls off into the darkness.

It’s really the only term for the way he moves. Like a cat.

I spend the rest of the cool-down thinking about what he said. I wish that I wasn’t thinking about it, but I can’t escape it.

Something is going to kill you.

That’s the bottom line. The truth. Colt had been riding bulls for years, and then he had one bad ride. Just one bad ride. That thought has burrowed its way into my head, and I can’t get out. I think about it the whole way to the poker game.

Of course, the poker game goes about like my ride. Three hands in and I’m losing badly, and I really don’t have any more money to keep on betting, but I want to.

That’s when Maverick shows up. That dark cloud that seems to follow him everywhere he goes coming in with him. The man is a whole thundercloud, complete with lightning.

“Still looking for another player?”

“You have a steep buy-in,” Holt says.

“I can afford it.”

I’m sure that he can. Not only has he been doing this a lot longer than the rest of us, he’s had a lot of endorsement deals over the years. He’s hot. He doesn’t have that boy-next-door, easy, accessible vibe that Colt has. No. He’s dangerous.

And I’m thinking too much about his looks again.

“How much?”

“Up to a thousand,” Holt says.

“Okay,” says Maverick, like it’s the silliest thing he’s ever heard, and he digs into his wallet and pulls out a few bills. I’ve got nothing but IOUs in the pot.

We deal the next hand, five-card draw, and my hand is actually looking pretty good. It’s a risk, but it’s one that I’m willing to take.

“I’ll make a bet,” Maverick says, placing a hefty bet that makes my eyes water.

Holt lets out a low whistle. “I raise you.”

“I call,” says Cade.

“Me too,” I say.

“I raise you,” Holt says.

Then I realize that I have to put a bet in.

Or fold. I don’t want to quit with Maverick there, and something reckless fires through my veins.

Like all the angst of the last few weeks – from Colt to my sister’s engagement, to the relentless feeling of time slipping by – possesses me and makes me feel like I have nothing to lose.

Something’s going to kill you.

“I fold,” Cade says.

“I’ll raise,” I say. “I bet me.”

I’m tired of being a sad virgin anyway, and Holt is hot. Maverick is hot. So… Either one of them can do the honors if they feel like it.

It feels less deadly than my fixation on Maverick for some reason.

That I’m leaving it up to chance. This is crazy, and I know it is, but I feel crazy.

I’ve missed this, honestly, this intense need to do something that takes over me sometimes.

It makes me feel alive in a way nothing else does, and it’s never been this, and maybe I’m losing it, but…

I’d rather do this than do nothing.

I’d rather be unhinged than bored.

I’d rather live than die in the arena as a virgin.

Than be a virgin while my sister gets a placement in the FEI Dressage World Cup finals and a husband.

“What the hell?” Holt asks.

“You heard me. I bet me . For the night. Either of you.”

Holt immediately flings more money into the center of the table.

Maverick looks at me, his eyes never leaving mine. “I’ll raise you.”

He puts yet more money in, and I realize that they’ve somehow determined the monetary amount on the bet that I’ve just given.

“I call,” says Cade.

Maverick looks at me. And his lips curve into a smile. Then it’s time for us to show our hands. My palms are sweaty. Cade puts his cards down and reveals a flush. And I grind my teeth together. I put down mine. Full House.

Maverick shakes his head slowly. And puts down my worst nightmare. A royal flush.

“I guess I win. Is that the whole night?”

I’m so embarrassed because I’m still sitting there in front of Holt and Cade, and my heart is going crazy. Not only that, I’m not horrified. I should be horrified. I should be terrified. Instead, I can feel a pulse of desire beating between my legs. I’m wet.

I’ve somehow manipulated myself into a situation where I’m going to sleep with Maverick Quinn.

After years of lusting after him on the circuit.

This is hands down the most unhinged thing I’ve ever done, but it’s all… All this. Everything that happened with Colt, everything that’s happened up till now. Tonight’s loss. I just feel anchorless, and I feel like I need something. Something’s going to kill me after all.

It might as well be Maverick Quinn.

I take a sharp breath and meet his gaze. “I guess that’s it for the game, then.”

“You’re not seriously going to cash this bet in?” Cade asks, reaching out and gripping Maverick by the forearm. Maverick looks down at where the other man’s hand is making contact with him.

“I wouldn’t put your hands on me if I were you,” Maverick says. “Because let me tell you, I’m always looking for an excuse. Give me one. See what happens.”

Cade seems to rethink his chivalry – which I believe was sour grapes and not honor – removing his hand quickly.

“That’s better. And hell yeah, I’m calling in the bet. She made it in good faith. I can only assume that Holt would’ve been in on it if he had won.”

“It’s fucking prostitution,” Holt says.

“Not exactly,” I say. “I’m not getting paid.

And anyway, how is it different from what y’all do at the bar every night?

” I give them both a frosty eye. “I think you were both hoping you could hook up with me by inviting me to this game. I just figured I’d make it official.

Besides, a girl has to get her entertainment somehow. ”

I should’ve actually said that I was betting my virginity. It probably would’ve driven the price up. Didn’t matter anyway, since I lost.

I lost.

And am I really going to go through with this?

Maverick is looking at me, and then he reaches out his hand. I swallow hard, and then I take it. His skin is rough, his hand hot and strong. And my heart is rattling around in my chest like a caged bird.

Then he pulls me forward, bringing me within just a couple inches of him. “You got a place to bunk?”

“I have my trailer. Don’t you have…”

“I was going to go to a hotel. But I don’t have a place booked. Might as well bunk down at your place.”

Then he’s leading me across the parking lot. And I have to act like I’m okay with it. Or I don’t. I don’t have condoms. Does he have condoms? He probably does. He certainly does. He’s that kind of man.

He flings open the door to my horse trailer, and I am aware that Holt and Cade are still watching us. So then I step into the door of the trailer, grip Maverick by the shirt, and pull him in.

Then I step away into the tiny space. It’s like a little one-person camp trailer, with a place for horses in the second compartment that’s much larger than the space for the human.

There’s a bed and a tiny little table. A place for me to put a cooler and a hot plate. And little else. I never have anyone in it, and with a man his size there, I’m overwhelmed.

He can’t straighten entirely, but even so, with his shoulders hunched, he begins to rock back and forth, making the whole trailer move with him.

“They’re going to think–”

He smiles at me, his expression something wicked.

“Isn’t that what you wanted? You were out there making a show, little girl.

And I assume that was for a reason. Haven’t you ever heard that saying?

Don’t go cashing checks your ass can’t cash.

Because I think that’s what’s happened just now.

” He stops rocking then and looks at the bed, not me. “Now hush. I’m tired.”

“Aren’t you going to…”

“Fuck no. I don’t have to take a bet to get a woman into bed. I can get sex if I want it. What I’d like is a good night’s sleep.”

It’s the first time I notice that he’s changed since his event. Since I saw him standing there smoking a cigarette. He doesn’t smell like smoke anymore. Or dust or hay. He smells clean.

He stretches out on the bed, putting his hands behind his head, looking at me through hooded lids. “I’m going to sleep in here. That’s my prerogative. I get you for the whole night. Didn’t say what I had to do.”

“I… I…”

“You want them to think that you’re daring. But what the hell would you have done if they’d won? Because I’ll tell you what, Holt would fuck you.”

“Maybe I wanted to fuck,” I say, my face getting red.

I’m shaking now. I bet myself and this man – this epic villain of the circuit – is going to leave me untouched?

I’ve never felt so stupid. So sad and small and ridiculous, because aren’t men just supposed to drop everything when they have an opportunity for sex? Morals, common decency, et cetera.

“Well, too bad for you, because I won.” He looks me up and down. “You’re what? Twenty-three?”

“I’m twenty- four ,” I say, crossing my arms. “I don’t know what that has to do with anything.”

He’s belittling me now and that’s just mean.

“You just bet yourself for a night. That was some dumb mid-twenties bullshit right there. I recognize that, because I’ve been it.

But I’m not it now. And I’m not going to play this game.

But you can have your reputation, and I’ll keep mine.

Everyone can continue thinking I’m the bad guy, who took you up on that bed, and you can remain unsullied. ”