Page 51 of Lucy Undying (Dracula #1)

51

August 14, 1890

Journal of Lucy Westenra

I’m feeling more at ease now. Though I’m up all hours of the night pacing, checking that the door is locked and the window latched—often until Mina awakes and guides me back to bed—I have seen no sign of the monster in the days since we met.

I don’t know what he did to me or why. My throat still hurts, and sometimes where my pulse should be is an icy emptiness for a beat, two beats, long enough that I fear I’m dying until my heart once again stumbles into action. But I saved Mina from him.

She has had no word from Jonathan, and I’m sorry I ever wished our time in Whitby over. I was being a bad, selfish friend, too lost in my own misery. Now that I know what true misery and horror is, Mina’s marrying someone else feels far less like life and death.

I can’t write more now. She’s returning from her visit to the church and we’re going for a walk. But I’m nearly myself once more. My brush with death makes me all the hungrier for life now, I think! I will survive all of this. Mina, marriage, and monster.

—

I wrote too soon. Walking toward the abbey and churchyard, I saw him. On my bench, on our bench. His eyes flashed red. I couldn’t tell whether he was looking at me or Mina. I don’t remember what I babbled or how I swooned with fear, but Mina had to guide me home again. She fussed over me all afternoon and evening, worried about my nerves, reminding me that I had to stay calm so as not to upset Mother. I fell asleep and woke in terror that Mina would be gone. That I had failed her. But she’s asleep in the bed next to mine. I sit now writing at the window, on guard for those endless red eyes.

He wanted me to see him today at the abbey. To know he’s still here, still watching, still—